"STOP!! I DIDN'T LEAVE ANYONE!!"

when I open my eyes the scenario changed and I get up discovering y/n looking at me with concern and a shocked face.

I found myself breathing heavily and sweating. okay!! that was a dream yoongi cool down.

y/n: had a nightmare?

she asked but I couldn't reply whenever I close my eyes I see them saying that I abandon them!!

"I didn't- I didn't leave them.!!"

y/n: heyy... it's okay! it was just a bad dream, I'm right here.

she said wrapping my head under her arms and resting on her shoulder. after a while I cool down and told her my dream... she left my head after hearing and shockingly look at me.

y/n: YOU DIDN'T TELL THEM?? THAT YOU HERE!??

I shook my head and she gasp.

"Nobody knows I'm here. they all think I'm in Daegu resting."

y/n: what the actual fuck happened all this time?? now I don't care if you are ready or not yoongi! you have to tell me everything.

I nod with my head low and start to talk then she pauses me.

y/n: but first... we'll take care of your nightmare... call namjoon now!

"But I didn't bring my phone!"

she was about to shock again but stop herself and went into her cupboard for a spare phone then she gave it to me.

y/n: call him!

"he'll be mad that I didn't tell y/n"

she snatches it from me and calls him on her own... I bite my nails in nervousness starring at the phone over her ear. how namjoon will responds knowing I'm not in Korea and out alone.

y/n: hello it's y/n!

she speaks and I signal her to put it on speaker.

namjoon: y/n I'm sorry but suga hyung is not here right... he's in Daegu but he should have contacted you till now!

y/n: because he's here!

namjoon didn't respond may be trying to register what she said. y/n pinch my thighs to speak... ouchh!

"namjoonah!! I'm here with y/n"

namjoon: hyung really? why didn't told us before?"

"aah-

y/n: just now he saw a nightmare where you all blamed him for leaving you all!

I hit my head! why she has to say that? namjoon stay quiet a bit... I'm doomed!! suddenly he chuckles.

namjoon: that's so great hyung... we all were thinking a way to let you both meet!! you did good... spend the time with her and clear all the misunderstandings I'll tell others about this... they'll be happy just like me.

my eyes widened by hearing him. thank God they don't think I left them!

"namjoonahh! thankyou"

namjoon: hyung bye... I was sleeping right now! and y/n I'm sorry for not responding to your calls and massage you'll know the reason from suga hyung. bye.

he said and cut the call with yawning sound. now I feel lighthearted and messed too! all I have to do is apologize to y/n and tell her the truth about that photos.

y/n: let's have breakfast first then you have a lot of explaining to do.

she said walking towards a bag in the corner and throwing clothes at me.

y/n: I still can't believe you came here in one outfit and nothing other than that... what you thought you'll see me from afar and go?

"I thought if you see me then you will hit me and walk away... didn't know you'll take me home."

I said scratching my nape, she chuckle, and signal me to get fresh for breakfast.

--//--

y/n dad is at work in a hospital and her sister Emma went to college, mom is out too... we are alone. I want to know what happen to her?? earlier she said 'she went through a lot all this time I won't know what happened.

but not before I explained my stupid decision! I mess up, hurt her and she always cleans it. why I'm this bad at relationships?

y/n: I'm still mad at you! so if I didn't like your reason I'll throw you out... yooongii.

she said sipping tea on the couch whereas I'm sitting across her like a scared cat. I'm fucked!! but I deserve this too. I should start before she kills me with her scariest glare.

I gulp close my eyes and start...

"After we good-bye I got a call from namjoon... you remember manager ask them urgently and they had to go?"

she nods with a 'hmm'

"yeahh so namjoon called and said that they know about us... I thought I'll sort things out and tell you later. when I reach our meeting room all were there... our crews, manager, members everyone.
Jin was signaling something that I don't understand... I was already sad about you going so I normally sit on the chair asking them to start the meeting."

she starts to take interest and pause everything while looking at me.

"then-manager throw some pictures of us on the desk... us hugging and kissing. I don't know how they got this but there was it! on the desk in front of all. I didn't have any excuse at that time. they gave us long lectures that we doing great and it's not a good time for any rumors."

hearing me she turns her real self to her vulnerable side.

"because of me they took all of our phones... said they'll give back once we made a comeback properly (BS&T) and should stop contacting you. I immediately open my phone while they collect others... I blocked you and delete the contact so that they don't contact you in my absence."

y/n: but your comeback came after 3 months! why didn't you contact me after that?

"that three months, they mocked me that 'they didn't expect that from me' 'all are without a phone because of me' 'everyone is disappointed in me' I watch others telling me 'it's alright we are good' but they listening lectures because of me."

y/n: so you all spend your 3 months without phone?

"No! company gave us another phone but the tapped one. even if I want to contact you I won't... they'll know what I'm doing on my phone."

y/n: what about after getting your phone back?

"as I said they drowned me into the guilt of making suffer other members because of me. that made me wait for more months...I unblocked you like thousand times even type the whole massage but didn't send it. it was hard I don't want you to understand me anymore that time."

y/n: you don't want me to understand you in the end?? so why did you come here? to end what we had?

she said with the saddest and scared face.

"I came because I missed you... every single day!!! I felt like I'm dying whenever I think of you."

she bit her bottom lips to control her tears but I said the truth every sec I there was like a year to me. she inhales deeply to blow the tears before they fall.

"it's all my fault. I was losing my mind there so as soon I got a week off, I contact my brother and came here with his help. I wanted to apologize on your face, not in massage."

I didn't tell anyone so at least I'll listen to the lecture later.

y/n: I don't know what to say.

"Just yell at me do whatever you thought you'll do when you see me again... but please don't stay quiet."

y/n: I hate us! I hate that just to see me you had to do all this. I'm sorry!

"don't say like this y/n! this sounds like you ending what we have... please don't!"

why? it's all because of me I deserve to be alone... if she leaves me it's my fault. tears have both faces but her is more obvious than mine... I'm fucking scared to hear her!

y/n: after I came back I loosed my job. my bo-boss tried to take advantage of me he thought I like him already.

"W-What?? that boss who also your friend?? and why the fuck he thought that you like him? did he harm you... you alright?"

I spring beside her and grip her shoulders to look at her whole. that motherfucker!! she nods her head and removes my hands from her then continues...

y/n: there was a party after a month I came back. that dick starts to introduce me as his girlfriend in front of his friends and clients... I didn't want to create any scene so I co-operate a bit and went early home.

"YOU DIDN'T SLAPPED HIM?? Y/N!!! that's so not you."

to be continued...

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(a/n: is the reason enough for him to stop contacting her? I mean sometimes happens right? our own guilt makes us stop doing the right thing.

thanks for reading... love you all 😚💜)