"Okay," Charlie said as she paced the floor nervously with a one-eyed cat-like creature prancing beside her feet. "So the Extermination is coming in six months instead of a year! No big deal! Just a little setback. Nothing we can't handle! Just angels cutting our time table in half, but who needs a whole year to save souls, am I right?! And next time, when they cut the time in half again, and AGAIN! We'll just HANDLE IT, RIGHT?!"

"Yes! We will," Vaggie calmly reassured her.

"Yeah, don't lose heart, Your Highness," Carrot Cake added. "I'm... almost sure we can figure this out."

"Thanks," Charlie replied. "And call me Charlie."

"Oh, please," Angel Dust huffed as he stared at his phone. "You had less than half a chance when you started all this salvation bullshit. And now... ain't no silver lining this time, toots."

"Sure, there is," Charlie insisted optimistically. "We just... have to look a little harder for it."

"Well, while you're lookin', the rest of Hell is goin' nuts," Angel Dust pointed out as he showed them a news article on his phone. "People are already freaking out about the news. Look at what's happening in the Doomsday District!"

At first, Charlie watched a video of a guy screaming in front of a fire, but then noticed a notification that read "New message from Valentino."

"Uh, what is a donkey show?" Charlie asked, confused. Angel Dust looked at his screen and his eyes widened.

"Ah, yeah... Uh, nothing!" he insisted with a nervous chuckle. "My boss, Val, is just freaked out about the news, too. Like I said, everyone's losin' their shit."

"Yeah, that's true," Vaggie realized. "Sinners are desperate. Maybe desperate enough to try anything to escape the Extermination!"

Charlie gasped. "This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!"

"Cute idea, and all, but you really gonna go out in all of this?" Angel Dust asked, showing her a video of a street engulfed in flames."

"Well, it's not like people are just going to show up on our doorstep," Charlie pointed out. Suddenly, there was a loud BOOM! and they all saw that something had blasted a hole in the wall!

"What the huh?!" Carrot Cake exclaimed, and looked out the wall hole to find a hideous airship aiming all of their weapons at the hotel.

"SHOW YOURSELF, ALASTOR!" a voice hollered. "COME AND FACE... Oh. There, you are. FACE MY WRATH!"

Alastor took a sip of his drink at a table and said to the ship's captain, "Who are you?"

"Who am I? Who am I?! I am the great Sir Pentioussss!" he hissed as Alastor just transported himself down to the ground with the others in a whiff of shadowy smoke. "Inventor, architect of destruction! Villain extraordinare!"

"Ooh! He's a bad boy!" Niffty gasped in excitement as she climbed up Alastor's shoulders. Alastor just grabbed and gently placed her back down.

"Ha! Well, if all that's true, you'd think I'd have heard of you," Alastor said smugly.

"I attacked you literally last week," Pentious pointed out. Alastor just tilted his head at him. "We've done battle, like, twenty times!"

"Well, you must've been really bad at this."

"Silence!" Pentious shouted. "Now, cower, for when I have slain you, the Almighty Vees will finally acknowledge me as their equal!"

"Ooh!" Niffty swooned, standing on Alastor's shoulders again. "Wait, who are the Vees?"

"Oh, nobody important," Alastor insisted, before returning his focus to Pentious. "Well, since you insist..."

Suddenly, several black shadowy tentacles rose up from the ground and two pulled the airship down while a third continuously punched it!

"Please! Stop!" Pentious screamed in horror. Alastor just chuckled at the spectacle.

"Alastor? I think he's had enough!" Charlie said nervously.

"Nah, he's got a few more hits in him," Angel insisted. Just then, Sir Pentious the steampunk cobra wearing a top hat with a giant red eye on it fell out of his airship and landed on his face.

"Thanks for another forgettable experience!" Alastor said to Pentious.

"Thank... you... for letting your guard down!" Pentious laughed as he ripped off the corner of Alastor's coat. Then, he heard Alastor bugle and said, "Oh, shit."

In a burst of green smoke, Pentious was blasted away into the red sky.

"Remind me not to get on his bad side," Carrot Cake whispered to Angel Dust.

"Well, it looks as though I need a visit to the tailor," Alastor said to the others. "Best of luck, chums!"

"Wait, you're leaving?" Vaggie exclaimed. "Alastor, we need your help! We need you to do your job!"

"We need a wall," Angel Dust added, pointing to the giant hole.

"Of course!" Alastor agreed. "Can't let my new project fall into disrepair already. What will the papers say?"

With that, Alastor conjured up a few construction workers to fix the wall, and left without another word. Angel pushed Vaggie aside and chuckled at one of the workers.

"Hey, sweet cheeks," he said flirtatiously. "Whatcha doin' later? I love me a man with a giant... tool."

"Um, okay..." Carrot Cake muttered as she packed a few papers into a satchel.

"What are those?" Charlie asked.

"Flyers to promote the hotel," she answered, showing one of them to the princess. "I spent half the night designing and copying them. I... I know they're kinda lame."

"This... is... great!" Charlie said ecstatically. "Let's go hand these out now!"

"Just out of curiosity, who are the Vees?" Carrot Cake asked as she handed stacks of flyers to Charlie and Vaggie.

"Three of the most powerful Overlords in Hell," Angel Dust explained. "Trust me, cupcake, you don't wanna rope yourself up with one of them."

"Overlords? You mean, like the big purple guy I met when I first came to Hell?" Carrot Cake wondered.

"Oh, Ramm's just a glorified foodie with a big dick," Angel Dust insisted. "He's harmless."

"To an extent," Vaggie warned. "He's still an Overlord. However, if there's anyone you should worry about, it's the Radio Demon..."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ajkaebudwq0

As Carrot Cake stuck flyers to windows and lampposts across Downtown, she made sure to avoid as much conflict as possible.

"The end is near!" a random sinner wearing garbage screamed. "The angels will come to smite all of Hell!"

"Would you like a chance to avoid that?" Carrot Cake asked as she held a flyer up to his face.

"Redemption... that's fucking hilarious," he laughed. "You can't escape your doom!"

"Cool it, Reg," a smooth voice said. Carrot Cake turned to find a familiar horned demon holding a wad of cash. "Here, go buy yourself some meth."

"Thanks, Ramm!" Reg replied, and headed down the street.

"Don't you have somewhere important to be?" Carrot Cake asked in annoyance.

"I gave all my employees time off until the panic dies down," he explained. "If you can't stand the heat, don't bother coming into the kitchen."

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense," Carrot Cake pointed out as Ramm glanced at one of the flyers.

"So, you're staying with Lilith's kid?"

Carrot Cake blinked. "Who's Lilith?"

"Lilith was our queen, the first woman, and the reason Hell exists," Ramm explained. "After she left Eden and fell in love with the angel Lucifer, they talked Adam's second wife Eve into eating that sweet forbidden fruit. Once humans had free will, what was to stop evil from influencing their choices? Lucifer was banished from Heaven and cast away with Lilith into the realm of sin they created together."

"Whoa," Carrot Cake gasped.

"Yeah, Lucifer gave up on his dreams and humanity, it's why nobody here takes him seriously," Ramm pointed out. "Lilith, on the other hand, grew more and more powerful, and I personally believe this made her ex jealous."

"What do you mean?" asked Carrot Cake.

"Even though he got into Heaven, Adam wasn't quite as respected by the Heavenly Council as he had hoped to be," Ramm said. "However, many of them feared a demonic uprising, and granted Adam the task of leading the annual Exterminations, since he was the only one up there who actually knew Lilith."

"So, Lilith is the reason there's so much suffering," Carrot Cake muttered. "Where is she now?"

"How should I know?" Ramm replied. "Speaking of suffering, how have you been, Chutney?"

"Shitty first week, but I've been doing better since yesterday," she admitted, continuing to put flyers up. "Also, I changed my name to Carrot Cake."

"Oh, after the first food I gave you," Ramm said with a seductive smirk. "That's very cute."

Carrot Cake huffed. "Look, if you think I'm going to accept that stupid offer, then..."

"Let me stop you right there for a second," Ramm interrupted. "I just wanna ask you a question. Do you honestly think sinners can be redeemed?"

"Well, I uh... I don't know," Carrot Cake admitted. "But I'm going to help Charlie anyways, because..."

Ramm raised an eyebrow at her as she paused. "Because...?"

"She reminds me of who I used to be," she replied. "That's all I will tell you."

"Fine," he said with a shrug. "But my proposal still stands. Let me feed and fuck you, and I will give you the world."

Carrot Cake rolled her eyes, but just before she could look back at Ramm, he was gone! Not that it really mattered.

"I'm not meant to have the world..."

I don't know if I should continue this... if anyone wants me to, let me know.