The morning I was to go back on the train for Christmas; I was freaking out.

Everyone assumed it was because I was worried about Harry waking in the night and having a vision of Ron's dad being slaughtered by a snake, but it was actually because I couldn't find my toad.

And the thought of going home without him for Christmas in these dangerous times was making me feel all sorts of uneasiness.

In my desperate attempt to locate him before I had to climb aboard the Hogwarts Express, I decided to venture into the dungeons.

There was one person who might know where he was.

"Excuse me!" I said, my voice quivering slightly as I approached a couple of Slytherins who had just made their way down from the stairs to the Entrance Hall. "Are you going into your common room?"

The two girls, who looked as though they might be in third year, both scowled at my robes.

"What's it to you? Gryffindor?" The larger of the two asked.

"I- I need to speak to Draco Malfoy," I stuttered. "Do you know him?"

At the mention of his name, both girls visibly swooned.

"Yes, of course we know him," the skinnier girl sighed dreamily, "who doesn't?"

"Right, good," I said stiffly, I was starting to feel desperate. Draco Malfoy was my last chance to find Trevor. "Do you think you could go and get him for me... please?"

"Who are you?" The larger one said sharply, her eyes narrowing as she looked me up and and down. "I don't believe Draco Malfoy associates himself with Gryffindors."

"Neve Longbottom, I'm in his year," I said, trying to keep the exasperation out of my voice. "Please... it's rather urgent."

Giving me one last scowl they both nodded before disappearing behind a wall.

Less than a minute later, a white-blond haired Slytherin emerged, his face furrowed in confusion.

"Neve?" he asked.

I was so taken aback by his use of my first name, that I quite forgot for a moment why I was there.

"What is it?" he prompted, taking a step closer to me.

"T-Trevor," I stuttered, his closeness causing my pulse rate to quicken. "I can't find him, and I'm about to get on the Hogwarts Express. I was wondering if you... you'd-"

"You think I've taken him?" he frowned, his grey eyes piercing me in quite an alarming way.

"No!" I said quickly, trying to control my frantic breaths. "No, I just wondered if you'd seen him lately? I- I can't bear the thought of not having him with me over Christmas..." I tailed off, realising how pathetic I sounded.

But instead of a nasty, mocking comment like I was expecting, Draco's face softened and he gave me a look of what I could only describe as compassion.

"Not seen him since yesterday," he shook his head apologetically, "but I'm staying on over Christmas... if you want, I could look out for him? You know... just to make sure he gets fed and stuff until you get back."

I swallowed, not quite believing these words were coming out of his mouth.

"Are you- are you sure?" I asked, my eyes searching his, wondering if I could trust my Trevor's life in this boy's hands.

"I'll look out for him, Neve, I promise, "he insisted, "He likes me. And he's all right, you know... for a toad."

I blinked, once again shocked at his use of my first name. So I hadn't imagined it the first time.

"You're not calling me Longbottom," I found myself stating, rather surprisingly boldly for me.

"Neve suits you better," he murmured softly and, despite the poor lighting, I couldn't miss the faint flush of colour in his normally pallid cheeks.

Our eyes locked and I suddenly felt highly flustered as the atmosphere seem to thicken around us.

A part of me was relieved when we were interrupted by the booming bodiless voice of Professor McGonagall warning all students going home for Christmas that departure time was in five minutes.

"I- I better go," I said breathlessly, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks.

I quickly turned my back on him and started to head back towards the stairs.

"Have a good Christmas, Neve,"

I stopped, and slowly turned my head.

"You too... Draco," I said, my lips tugging into a small smile.

And when he returned it with one of his own, unexpected butterflies fluttered maddeningly in my stomach.

For there, in his silver grey eyes, was the unmistakable twinkle that I had always imagined my prince would one day have.

*****

I spent the entire journey back to Kings Cross station looking dreamily out of the window, sighing blissfully in the warmth that had settled throughout my entire body.

Not even Trevor's absence could ruin my mood, not when I knew he was in very good hands.

"Why, Neve," Gran said when I stepped onto the platform, "you're looking well! Am I to assume that Hogwarts is finally bringing out the Longbottom in you?"

"You know something, Gran?" I said dreamily, thinking of those twinkling silver eyes and hearing my name on his lips, "I think it's certainly bringing out my Neve."

I spent the next two weeks telling Gran all about Dumbledore's Army who looked on at me with such immense pride ("They're lucky to have you, Neve; Another Longbottom, fighting the good fight!").

We spent Christmas Day in St Mungo's, visiting Mum and Dad.

"Our Neve is showing her true Longbottom colours!" Gran beamed at my father who was gazing up at the ceiling. "Fighting behind Dumbledore right next to the very Harry Potter!"

Dad said nothing.

I looked down at the floor, blinking back the tears.

"Well," Gran said, making a theatrical show of looking at her watch, despite the fact that Dad wouldn't even understand. "It's time we must get back to put the potatoes on. You know how much our Neve loves her Gran's roasties!"

Slowly, I stood up, leaning forward to kiss Dad's forehead who looked back at me, blinking in startled surprise.

It was the same every visit.

"Merry Christmas, Dad," I whispered.

He said nothing, instead just mutely watched me as I turned away to shrug my coat on.

Mum's bed lay empty due to her wandering up and down the ward, helping herself to sweets from the other patients bedsides; not unlike a little child.

I started to move across the room towards her when I heard a voice that made my stomach drop.

"Hey, Neve!"

I looked up to see Harry, Ron and Hermione just inside the doorway of the closed ward.

"It's us, Neve!" Ron said brightly again. "Have you seen-? Lockhart's here! Who've you've been visiting?"

"Friends of yours, Neve, dear?" Gran enquired, coming up behind me.

I felt a flush rise to my cheeks as everyone looked at me expectantly for introductions and explanations. But I found I couldn't meet anyone's eye.

"Ah, yes," Gran continued, looking closely at Harry and holding out a hand for him to shake. "Yes, yes, I know who you are, of course. Neve speaks most highly of you."

"Er - thanks," Harry said, shaking hands. I could feel his gaze on me but I didn't tear my eyes away from my feet, my cheeks heating further.

"And then you must be Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger." Gran continued, shaking their hands in turn. "Yes, Neve's told me all about you. Helped her out of a few sticky spots, haven't you? She's a good girl, but she hasn't got her parents' talent, I'm afraid to say."

And to my horror, she jerked her head towards where my parents' beds lay.

"What?" Ron said, looking amazed. "Is that your dad down the end, Neve?"

"What's this?" Gran said sharply. "Haven't you told your friends about your parents, Neve?"

I took a deep breath, looked up at the ceiling and shook my head. I just wanted the ground to swallow me up.

"Well, it's nothing to be ashamed of!" Gran said angrily. "You should be proud, Neve, proud! They didn't give their health and their sanity so their only child would be ashamed of them, you know!"

"I'm not ashamed," I said faintly, still looking anywhere but at the golden trio.

The thing is, no one had ever bothered to ask me why it was that I lived with my gran and not my parents. And I could never seem to find the way to ever bring it up; too afraid that people would laugh and mock them.

Especially when the nephew of the person who had done this to them was the same boy who had once bullied me relentlessly.

"Well, you've got a funny way of showing it!" Gran hollered. "My son and his wife," she said, turning haughtily to Harry, Ron and Hermione, "were tortured into insanity by You-Know-Who's followers."

Ron and Hermione both clapped their hands over their mouths, looking mortified. Harry, however, did not look surprised by this 'new' information.

"They were Aurors, you know, and very well respected within the wizarding community," Gran went on. "Highly gifted, the pair of them. I- yes, Alice dear, what is it?"

Mum had come edging down the ward in her nightdress, making timid motions towards me, holding something in her outstretched hand.

"Again?" Gran said, wearily. "Very well, Alice dear, very well - Neve, take it, whatever it is."

But I had already stretched out a hand, allowing Mum to drop an empty Drooble's Best Blowing Gum wrapper into it.

"Very nice, dear," Gran said in a falsely cheery voice, patting Mum on the shoulder.

"Thanks, Mum," I whispered quietly.

She turned and tottered silently away; a sadness tugging at my heart. I looked around at the others, my expression defiant, bracing myself for their amused faces.

But all I saw was pity.

I didn't know what was worse.

After they left, I pocketed the empty sweet wrapper and, that night, slipped it under my pillow, dreaming of the mother I never got to have.

*****