***Jake's POV***

Its been 5 months since I was last happy, since I last saw her, since the break up...It's been 5 months since I made the biggest mistake of my life.

I sat in my stall half dressed with my thumb hovering over her number. I probably do this before every game. I sometimes think she'll call me. My teammates think I've gone crazy, I probably am. Who checks their phone every time it goes off. Waiting for someone, who probably won't text let alone call.

"Jake, buddy. Either you call her or you finished getting dressed because the game starts in ten minutes" McAvoy told me

I tossed my phone to the side and finished getting ready.No one really asks me how I'm doing anymore. I've been like this for the past 5 months, not much has changed for me. Everyone just keeps telling me to call her but every time I try I just can't. I think about what she'll say or if she'll even answer my call. For all I know she's probably moved on by now.

"ALRIGHT BOYS LETS KICK SOME MAPLE LEAF ASS" Pasta yells as we start to leave the dressing room, taking me out of my thoughts

***Y/N POV***

"Let's Go Boys" Kylie yelled at the TV

I sat on the couch beside my best friend, Kylie who was also Charlie McAvoy's girlfriend. I met her when Jake started playing for the Bruins. We became such good friends. She's stayed by my side through every thing. Especially my break up with Jake.

"Charlie baby, you looking hot tonight" Kylie said causing me to laugh a bit

I watched the camera show each of the guys during the national anthem. For some reason I felt they showed Jake for an extra long time. I just stared at that TV screen the whole time he was on it. I couldn't look away for some reason. Then as soon as the camera panned to someone else I looked away. I then suddenly filled with sadness and Kylie noticed.

"You okay girl?" she said softly

"I will be" I said softly

I just sat there and stared at my lap. Tears started to well up in my eyes.

"I miss him. I miss him so much" so managed to croak out, trying to hold back my tears

"Y/N, Oh my goodness. Why didn't you tell me" Kylie said as she pulled me into a side hug

"I feel so stupid feeling like this. It's been 5 months since we broke up. We haven't called or texted each other once"

"Awe, babe don't feel stupid. It's normal to feel like this way it's because you really loved him"

"I still do Ky"

***Jake's POV***

We ended up beating the leafs 4-2. All the boys celebrated as we entered the dressing room. Cheering and yelling went on around me as a sat in my stall, once again going through my phone notifications. Checking if I missed a call or text from her. And like always I see nothing.

"Jake! Come to Marchy's with us. We're going to celebrate this win and our clinched playoff spot" Charlie said as he sat down next to me

I shrugged my shoulders "Maybe"

As everyone left to go to Marchand's place I drove home. Not really wanting to be around happy people when I wasn't feeling 100 percent. Plus I thought long and hard during the game and I think I might call Y/N tonight.

I took a little detour on my way home and I ended up sitting in my car, in the parking of the building that started this all. I didn't know why I was here or what made me come here, but here I was sitting in the parking lot. Of the bar where I got blacked out drunk with the guys before the season started. And kissed a girl that wasn't my Y/N.

I let out a breath that I didn't even know I was holding in. I then headed inside. The smell of alcohol filled the room. I sat at the bar facing away from everyone. The memories coming back clearly. That's when I raised my hand to grab the bartender's attention.

And that's when it started drink after drink. I couldn't stop, I couldn't control myself. Just thinking about everything made me lose control.

I lost count of how many drinks I had but I knew I wasn't okay. I really needed help so I called Charlie to come get me.

***Y/N POV***

After the game Kylie got a text from Charlie. Letting her know that he would pick her up later unless she wanted to go to Marchy's. She decided to stay with me until Charlie came to pick her up. After she left my apartment got really quiet. I was in the middle of heating up leftovers when my phone went off. Without check the caller ID, I answered it.

"Charlie I-I'm at the bar. I'm not s-sure why I came here. B-but I need you to come and get me"

I didn't say anything and then the familiar voice continued

"Charlie I was gonna c-call Y/N and tell her that I still l-love her and that I fucked up but then I ended up here. I n-need your help man"

I knew exactly who was on the other end of my phone but I'm not sure he knew who was on the other end of his

"J-Jake?" I felt the lump in my throat grow before the tears started

"Y/N?" He said in shock

The way he had spoke I knew he wasn't sober and it worried me.

"Yeah it's me. Jake where are you?"

"No Y/N. You don't want to come I'm a mess. I meant to call Charlie"

"Well you didn't call him. You called me. So where are you I'm coming to get you"

He didn't answer me. I just wanted to make sure he was okay and I needed to see him no matter what condition he was in.

"Jake I'm not taking no for an answer. Where are you?"

He finally told me his location. I then drove off in his direction.

I slowly rolled up to the bar to find Jake standing outside with his head hung low. He slowly approached the car, opening the passenger door and crawling in.

"Jake" I said quietly

"I'm not talking about this right now" Jake said as he looked out his window. I respected Jake's choice so I just focused on the road back to my place.

I could tell that Jake knew we weren't going to his place. We needed to talk about us and I knew he wasn't going to let me in his house. I parked in my parking stall and slowly headed up to my apartment, with Jake behind me dragging his feet.

Jake stood outside the door as I entered.

"You can come in" I told him

He slowly stepped in and struggled to remove his shoes. I went to help him but he stopped me. When he finished I showed him to the living room and he sat down on the couch. I joined him and we sat in silence for a while.

"Are we going to talk?" I asked

"Talk about what Y/N, how I fucked up yet again"

"No. Us, Jake. Are we going to talk about us?"

"What's there to talk about?" He questioned

I knew his mind wasn't in the right place at the moment. So I just took a breath to calm down.

"Let's start with the fact that you said you still love me" I said remembering what he said earlier

"What's there to say. Y/N I love you and I haven't stopped loving you. You were the best thing to ever happen to me. But I fucked up and lost you and I deserved that"

"Jake I-"

"Look Y/N I think it was a bad idea for you to bring me here. I'm just going to call Charlie to pick me up"

Jake then reached into his pocket for his phone. Just before he could open it I jumped over to his side of the couch grabbed his face and kissed him. It caught him off guard but he then started to kiss back. It turned into a short make out session. We pulled away at the same time with our foreheads connected and breathing heavily.

"I was gonna say. Jake I still love you too and even though it's been 5 months since everything happened. I'm willing to look past everything for you, for us. I haven't stopped thinking about you since everything happened"

Jake smiled after I said that.

"So do you maybe want to try us again?" He asked me

"If you can ask me that tomorrow when you're sober, then yes"

•••••

A/N
requested by MrsDeBrusk

Thanks for requesting :) <3