SONG REWRITE

(This AU was made by me all the way in Middle School! And now edited and polished by me and Fiona! An AU where the characters got their memories back and formed a resistance to rise against The Ink Demon!

Inspired by Engineers Are Your Friend made by Random Encounters.)

Buddy: Hey, uhh, doc? You okay?

Shawn: I'm not going to get the taste of that expired Bacon Soup out of my- BLEGHHH!

Norman: Well, I think I've got something to get your mind off it. Sit by the fire. Look at the stars...in fact! Tom, hook a brother up.

Norman held out a sausage in front of him. Tom sighed and then took out a custom made flamethrower and burnt the sausage that was held out in front of him.

Norman: Uhh...thanks.

Jack: Hey, Norman. What's with the guitar?

Norman: Well, since we're settin' up a fire? Figured I could sing a little song.

Shawn: Oh, here we go.

Norman starts playing the guitar.

Norman: ~I was guarding some joint, with a gun ready to point. My trusty projectors nearby. But along came a ROCKET, when I couldn't block it, then I knew that searcher must die~

Tom: Say what now-

Norman: ~So I gave its big noggin' a serious floggin! Then put a round in its rear end! And now it's digestin' without its intestines. Cause the projectors weren't his friend. The wrench was my scythe! I'm a herald of doom! Gorges are graves now, and my fort was their tomb! It's too late to duck if you hear it go BOOM! But projectors are your friend~

Jack: ...WHAT.

Norman: There. Now, doesn't this help?

Tom: How about a happier song?

Norman: Fine, fine. Let's see...

Buddy gulped.

Norman: ~I had me a chum who would chug too much rum, then go blow the place up, as kids do! But I realized one night as he vanished from sight that ol' Joey had that cold inky goo! When I saw I'd been tricked, I was pretty dang ticked! And my fists, well, they started to clench! And he screamed and then bled when I took off his head! With the business end of this here wrench!~

Shawn: Wait, that never happ-

Norman: ~The ink runs like rivers when I come around! I'll blow you to slivers all over the ground! We'll bash you and beat you until we defeat you! But projectors are your friend!~

Shawn: ...eh, it's an improvement.

Buddy: Do all these stories end in murder?

Norman: Alright, ya babies. What do you want from me?

All: ...

Tom: ...love?

Norman: Heh. That ain't my strongsuit.

Buddy: You've never had a girlfriend?

Norman: Well...there was one.

Shawn: This is gonna be about a projector...

Norman: ~Her name was Katrina, and if she had seen ya, you'd probably be dead in a box! She was little and bright, and had one helluva light! Like some kind of glow-up fox! She died from a Piper, and Tom couldn't scrap her! So Trina got made a new twin and her new baby sister, she miserably missed her, but her light missed no one again!~

Buddy: The implications of that scare me...

Norman: ~And I'd smile and strum on my ink-stained guitar! While no-scoping scumbags both near and afar! We'll blow all your brains out, whoever you are! Me and all of my friends...~

He creepily puts his arms around everyone, making everyone there rather uncomfortable. Tom of all people tried to scoot away.

Norman: ~So don't be afraid to come sit by my fire and toast up a wiener or two! But if you double cross me, then things will get saucy and I'll blow a big hole straight through you...WE'LL MASSACRE THEIR MEDICS AND ALL OF THEIR SCOUTS, INCLUDING THEIR BRUTES TO GOUGE THEIR EYES OUT!~

Everyone backed up.

Norman: ~I'd kill this whole crew, but we ain't evil goo! Oh, projectors are....your....friend!~

Shawn: ...we're sure about the 'we ain't evil' part? Cause you might be.