"Tord, get your feet off the counter!"

Tom watched in amusement as Edd smacked Tord's leg. The Norse surprisingly did as he was told, a long yawn escaping him. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, mom." He glanced at Tom and gave him a tired smile. Early, Sunday morning light came through the window above the sink. Edd cooked breakfast for them as he always did, his wallet and keys sitting safely on the counter.

It'd been a few weeks since they'd confessed their love to each other. Tom had to admit, he liked the newfound constant attention Tord gave him. Often, Tord would slip into Tom's room (or the other way around) for a few hours so they could cuddle and watch a shitty movie. Then Tord would have to leave so Edd and Matt wouldn't think anything about it.

Admittedly, Tom didn't like all the secrecy, but the anxiety that came with the thought of telling Edd and Matt overwhelmed it.

Edd snapped him out of his thoughts as he placed a plate of food in front of Tom. "Bone apple teeth."

"Shut it, nerd," Tord piped up as he dug into his scrambled eggs.

Tom rolled his eyes as he stabbed at his hash browns. "I don't know why you're not a professional cook yet," he joked as he took a bite.

"Matt can make better food than I. I just know how to put stuff in a frying pan." Edd rolled his eyes. Matt perked up at his name.

"I can?" he asked, head tilting.

With a roll of his eyes, Edd just said, "Nevermind."

During their rather chattery conversation (mostly thanks to Matt), Tom's phone buzzed.

Again.

He checked the number, only to see it as an unknown one. He rolled his eyes, not bothering to check the message itself. After Tom blocked the number, Danny got another one... then another one... then another one. Tom could've gone to the police, but Tom genuinely doubted they'd do anything. They don't do shit for women, why'd they do it for a guy?

Oops.

"Who was that?" Tord asked, perking an eyebrow. Edd and Matt didn't seem to notice, talking away.

A soft sigh escaped Tom's lips. "You know who."

"She got another number?" Tord let out a huff. "What a bitch."

Tom just smiled at that as he took another bite of his food and put his phone down. Edd glanced over at them, his plate empty. "You guys gonna come with us this time?" he asked, attracting Matt's attention as well.

They awkwardly glanced at each other. "I don't think so. Shopping is boring," Tord said, leaning back in his chair.

Edd sighed. "Alright, fine." He grabbed Matt's empty plate and tossed the two of theirs into the trash can. "Welp, we'll see you guys when you get home." He grabbed his keys from the counter and waved for Matt to follow him

Once they were alone, Tom leaned back in his seat. "What are we gonna do today?" he asked, eyebrow raising.

Tord just offered him a smile. "What do you think?" He grabbed Tom's hand and pulled it closer to him, pressing a soft kiss against it. "Anything you want?"

With a roll of his eyes, Tom took Tord's wrist and gave it a tug. "Honestly, let's just have sex already."

Well. So much for foreplay.

Tom got up from his seat and instead jumped up onto the corner of the island. Tord rolled his eyes at Tom as well, standing up. He wrapped his arms around Tom's waist, pressing a soft kiss against Tom's forehead. "Do you wanna go slow or what?"

"Nah." Tom grabbed Tord's collar and pulled him closer, a low grin on his face. "Come on, let's fuck."

Tord shook his head, pressing a kiss against Tom's lips as he slid his hands under Tom's sweatshirt. "You're so cute when you're needy, min kattunge," he murmured, pressing his lips against Tom's jawline.

"Whatever." Tom didn't bother with whatever foreplay Tord planned, his hands immediately going for Tord's jeans. "Off," he ordered, unbuttoning it and giving it a tug.

Tord scoffed and pulled away, grabbing one of Tom's hands and pulling it up. "What's your deal?" he asked teasingly, slowly pushing Tom down. "Why are you so horny today?"

With nothing but a glare, Tom snapped back with a simple, "Fuck off."

Tord rolled his eyes at Tom's behavior--a good fuck would put him in a more fluffy mood. He grabbed the hem of Tom's sweatshirt, tugging it off of him. His teeth immediately found Tom's collarbone, earning a soft gasp. Tord bit down, nails digging into Tom's waist.

Suddenly, Tom's phone buzzed.

Tord pulled back as Tom let out a groan of distaste. "Can you please shut my phone off?" he asked in annoyance, glancing at his phone on the counter. He couldn't reach it from where Tord had him.

"Why don't you just tell her to fuck off?" Tord asked as he grabbed the phone, glancing at the text from the unknown number.

Tom pouted. "I doubt it'd work. She's persistent as fuck." He ran his hand through his hair as Tord glanced down at him.

"I... have an idea." Tord looked back at the phone. "Can I take a picture of you like this?"

His eyebrows raised. "What?"

"To send to her. She might back off if she knows you're with someone else," Tord said, head tilting.

Tom's lips pursed in thought. "Only if you're in the photo with me."

Tord brightened at that. "Alright! But you gotta open the message for me, please." He handed the phone to Tom. He took it and typed in his password, opening up his messenger app or whatever the fuck it is and handed it back to him.

"Hurry it up," Tom grumbled like some sort of tsundere, making Tord roll his eyes. He held the phone up as he leaned down to press a soft kiss against Tom's neck. Tom also seemed to get the memo, just tilting his head and throwing up his middle finger as a pose. Tord snapped the photo, stifling a laugh as he leaned back.

He typed out a simple, "He's taken. <3"

Then he sent the photo, shut the damn phone off, and placed it back down on the counter. Tom looked up at him, offering a smile that looked like a mix between a humorous and seductive look. "Do I get a reward for my obedience?"

Tord rolled his eyes. "Shut the actual hell up." He pulled out a small bottle of lube (Tom wasn't even surprised anymore--Tord basically brought lube everywhere he went now) before tugging off his own sweatshirt, tossing it on the island.

It didn't take long for the two of them to distract themselves with kisses once more, the occasional hickey added into the mix as Tom gently traced Tord's tattoo. Tord's hands found Tom's sweatpants, tugging them and his briefs down, backing up so he could pull them off. He didn't bother to get them off completely, rather just until one leg was free and the sweatpants draped from his other leg.

Once that ended, Tom needily pulled Tord in for another kiss as the Norse hurriedly shoved his jeans and boxers down, revealing his erection. Tord pulled away, but just barely, their lips still touching. "You ready?" he murmured, earning a scoff.

"Hurry up already."

Tord rolled his eyes once more, pulling back further so he could squirt the lube onto his cock. He wrapped his hand around himself as he tossed the bottle of lube onto the island's counter. Once he was suitably covered in lube, he wiped his hand off against his jeans before grabbing Tom's hips.

With a huff, Tom propped himself up on his elbows, moving his leg and hitching it up on Tord's shoulder. "Come on."

"You're so needy." Tord pushed inside of him, hands travelling up Tom's waist and to his nipples, giving them a soft squeeze. A soft moan left Tom, a sign that Tord better hurry up.

With that, they fell into a rhythm, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room. Tord kept a tight grip on Tom's waist, nails digging in and giving Tom a dull pain that he knew he liked.

"God, fuck..." Tom whined out, head tilting back as his fists clenched. "I love you." He squeezed his eyes shut, earning only a hum as Tord focused on his movements.

Tom's leg slid off of Tord's shoulder as he pulled one of his hands from under him, reaching up and grabbing at the nape of Tord's neck. He forced Tord down, catching the Norse's lips with his own.

They were a bit too occupied to hear the garage door open.

A high-pitched moan escaped Tom as Tord deepened the kiss, pushing down until Tom's back pressed against the cool marble.

"What the f--"

In mere milliseconds, they were apart from each other, eyes wide and faces turning red.

Edd stood there, hand on the entryway to the hallway. Their eyes met, and a staring contest ensued.

Holy shit. Holy actual shit.

"I... forgot my wallet..." Edd awkwardly mumbled, his own cheeks pink. Despite the awkward moment, he couldn't break eye contact with them as he awkwardly leaned over to grab his wallet.

Once again, silence overtook them as Edd ducked out into the hallway, practically running out of the house to spill the tea to Matt.

"We're so fucked."

Edd and Matt didn't come home for quite awhile. Tom could only guess that they did not want to be in the house.

Not to mention, Tord got a lovely text message.

Edd

Please clean the kitchen before we get home

Tom wanted to fucking die.

They finally came home in the evening, and Matt ditched them all to hide out in his room. Edd, on the other hand, motioned for them to come into the living room.

It's just as awkward as you would think it'd be.

They all sat down on the couch, Tom pinching the bridge of his nose as Tord looked at the ground.

"So..." Edd clicked his tongue. "I know it's not technically my business, but how long?"

Tord opened his mouth to respond, only to close it because he honestly had no idea. Tom, on the other hand, responded with an awkward, "Since June."

"J--" Edd's eyes widened, and he huffed. "June?"

"I think so," Tord piped up, reaching up to rub the back of his neck.

Edd clasped his hands together like some kind of condescending parent. "It's been nine fucking months... and you didn't think to tell me or Matt?"

"Well, we technically haven't been 'official' until last month..." Tord shrugged awkwardly.

Edd didn't respond, internally calculating what Tord meant by that.

"Oh my--"

"Wait--"

"You guys were friends with benefits!?"

Tom's cheeks burst into flames as he covered his face, groaning into his hands as Tord awkwardly laughed, just nodding.

"Tom, I thought you said you were straight?" Edd said, sounding rather exasperated.

"Not anymore," Tord mumbled, earning a glare from Tom. The Brit grabbed a pillow from the couch and slammed it against Tord.

"Fuck off you bisexual bitch!" he snapped, eyebrows furrowed as Tord laughed.

"The fuck you mean? You're bi too!" he pointed out, only to get hit with the pillow once more.

Edd just watched the scene, pinching the bridge of his nose. "So you guys are a couple now? Not friends with benefits?"

They looked back at him and realized that they should probably stop, so Tom put down the pillow as Tord said, "Yes. Boyfriends now."

"Okay. That's all I wanted to know." Edd stood up, ready to leave before glancing at them. "You guys cleaned the kitchen, right?"

Tord nodded, and poor Edd just got the hell out of there. With that over, the Norse glanced at Tom. "See? That wasn't so bad. Besides the initial shock, he took it well. Nothing to worry about."

Tom looked over at him, expression deadpan. "I was on the verge of a panic attack that whole conversation."

This is a shorter one folks, only 2k words. i'm gonna try not to be too sentimental during this a/n bc honestly that's all i've been doing

school's started so that's p chill, i'm doing online bc i'm high risk. and that was uh. pretty smart. because my school lasted three days before someone caught covid. and we weren't going to close the school down for online classes. then she went to a party/sports game (i've heard both so idk) so school got online for two weeks lmao

but uh school's being weirdly fucking easy for me. sorry if that. sounds braggy. but i'm ahead in a majority of my classes. so i've legit only been spending 3-ish hours on average (followed by like a six hour day on friday bc i'm lazy). but it's wack

also i find this funny and i'm not trynna vent to be clear,,,but like i've been doing the thing. that i do. when i'm either on the verge of a mbd or during one. like i'm watching/playing a lot of minecraft (i don't know why that's a tell for my mental state but it sure is), isolating myself from my friends (honestly not complaining about that tho, i like being alone), and just. not fucking writing. which is why today is such a good day for me, i did about 1.5k of the words today so hopefully i'll be fine! but like here's the thing to that. i havent actually had the mbd yet. it's been months and i'm constantly like "hrmmm wonder when the fuckening is gonna happen," it's great i swear

overall tho i'm in a pretty good mood. i've been catching technoblade's streams and honestly? he's become one of my fav youtubers extremely fucking quickly. i love him more than i love myself

that's it! i hope everyone has a good day!!!

also!!! i've created a fucking timeline for ofh for this, it was wack

oneeee last thing. i've been thinking about going and fixing up the earlier chapters, introducing danny earlier (prolly not by name tho), and fixing up some of tord's behaviors

short story time (related)

everyone always says i write tord's personality good and it's just. so fucking funny to me. because i hate tord. i think around a year ago, i chilled tf out bc i became less obsessed with the fandom, but like. that's the reason why tord's behavior is so fucking shitty, especially in the beginning. like yes it was intentional, however in my mind, at the time, i was like "tord is too shitty to become a better person. Fuck You, Tord"

that's it lmao