"Tim! It's movie night!"

"What the fuck do you mean, 'movie night'? It's six in the afternoon!" Tom called back, but left his room anyway, hand gripping his phone.

"One more correction out of you, and I'll hide all your Smirnoff," Tord threatened as Tom walked into the room.

That earned him a glare as Tom stood in front of the Norwegian. "If you do that, I'll make you deepthroat one of your own shotguns, commie," he spat viciously, leaning forward.

Edd and Matt shared an uneasy glance.

"Bold of you to assume I wouldn't like it, Jeho." Tord winked.

Tom tilted his head back and laughed, his salty state disappearing within a second. He sat down on the couch next to Tord, pulling his phone out as Tord grinned.

"What just happened?" Matt whispered to Edd, eyes blown wide as his hands gripped drinks for everyone.

"I've got no clue," Edd admitted as he held onto the popcorn.

"So, what are we watching?" Tom asked, blinking up at the duo as Matt handed him a bottle of water.

Matt tossed Tord a Solo before settling into the couch with his angry, static water (sparkling water). "Edd said it had Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson in it, so... eye candy."

"Oi! Don't go cheating on me!" Edd said as he practically launched himself on the couch, bringing Matt up a few inches. "Nah, it's called Skyscraper or something." He waved his hand dismissively before cracking open a cold one with the boys (cola, of course).

They all laughed as Matt grabbed the remote.

The movie started, but Tom's mind had strayed elsewhere. This movie had been out for awhile, and he had already seen it but didn't want to complain.

Instead, his eyes found Tord and his mind wandered to a land of the Norwegian.

His heart eased at the thought of him. He really did love spending time with the asshole, even if silence filled the air. He just liked being near him, watching the way his chest rose and fell with each breathe. The way his russet eyes shone when he told a stupid joke or teased Tom...

He's cute as fuck. (Don't let Tord hear him say that.)

You know, Tom's never really understood why people say that your stomach fills with butterflies when they're around someone they love. Tom's never been like that. For him, it's always been just goofy smiles and a melting heart, as they always seem to calm him down. He even thought he might've been aromantic for awhile, as he never really understood what "love" meant. Tord seemed to have the same impact on him.

Wait.

No.

Tom doesn't—he doesn't love—that's fucking ridiculous, he's not—he's still not gay, people, that's a sin.

A nudge to his side pulled him out of his thoughts so fast, he could've sworn he got confused sexuality whiplash.

"You alright, Jeho?" Tord murmured comfortingly into his ear, a hand on his outer thigh (nonsexually). "You look like you've got a midlife crisis going on."

Tom gave him an unsteady smile. "How can I have a midlife crisis? I'm in my twenties."

"Did I fucking stutter?"

A small laugh escaped his lips, earning a glance from Edd. "No, I guess you didn't."

"Seriously, though. Are you sure you're okay?"

Tom sighed, rolling his eyes as he reached for Tord's hand. "I'm fine. I promise." He gave Tord a quick squeeze.

That earned a soft hum as Tord returned his attention back to the movie. Tom glanced back at their intertwined hands and internally reminded himself how gay holding hands are.

You've literally been fucking for like, months, and you're worried about holding hands? the left side of his brain thought.

One more word out of you, and I will slaughter your host, his right brain responded.

Tom shook his head at himself, tilting his head back and revealing his Adam's apple as he sighed.

Fucking...

Tom has spent years unteaching the homophobia his parents had taught him—he did his best to be an ally, but he knew he had some homophobia left in him. He fucking hated that. He knew it'd take awhile, but...

He couldn't help but feel like that's a pretty big factor in why he's so damn confused about his sexuality. (Still not gay, guys.)

What's so bad about being gay, anyway? Or liking the same sex in general. It's just attraction.

How do you even describe attraction? Like seriously, attraction is weird as fuck you allosexuals; give the author a break.

Tom shook his head and sighed. He'd think about his sexuality and internalized homophobia later. Eyes closing, he rested his head against Tord's shoulder.

What felt like five minutes later, Tord gently nudged him awake. "The movie's over, Jeho."

Tom blearily opened his eyes, shuffling. "Fuck off," he mumbled, lifting his head up. Glancing around, he sighed. Matt managed to crawl onto Edd's lap during the movie, asleep while using Edd's shoulder as a pillow, whom of which had fallen asleep too. He snored loudly, head tilted back and arms wrapped around Matt.

How cute.

"You just wanna stay here with me?" Tord asked, hand moving to massage Tom's scalp. "You're pretty cute, Thomas."

Tom huffed, slapping Tord's arm. "Shut up." He placed his head back on Tord's shoulder.

The closer he got to the Norwegian, the more the scent of smoky vanilla filled his nose. He sighed deeply, cuddling into Tord's side to chase it. Not to mention, Tord's shoulder was a surprisingly good pillow, though it might be because of his excessively expensive hoodie.

Seriously. That shit had fur inside it. It's pretty reasonable that Tom steals it all the time.

What a rich asshole.

Tord sighed in content, bringing Tom closer to him, arm wrapped around the Brit's waist. "Do you know how cute you are?" he murmured gently, soothingly rubbing his waist. "Sinnsykt søt. Du er så forbanna søt, kattunge. Jeg er ganske sikker på at jeg faktisk kan el—" Tord cut himself off, eyes going wide.

"Why'd you stop?" Tom mumbled angrily, shifting. "I like it when you talk."

"Really? You always seem to complain when I do."

A scoff. "Shut up, Tord."

"Point made."

So, Tom just cuddled Tord in the dark, eyes open and cheeks pink. He couldn't seem to fall asleep as he stared at Tord.

Tord seemed to fall asleep, his arm loosening around Tom. He looked nice with his eyes closed as he breathed softly. Tom could've sworn just looking at him made his cheeks grow more pink.

Would it really be that bad if he wasn't straight?

His heart plummeted at the thought, eyes widening. Yeah, he's been thinking about his sexuality this whole time, but the words "wasn't straight" did not cross his mind.

He stood, Tord's hand uselessly falling on the couch. His parents would fucking murder him if they found out he had thoughts like that. Absolutely not.

Tom held his breath as he rushed out the living room and into the hallway that led out.

After ten-ish minutes of walking, maybe more, he pushed into the bar.

"Hey, Tom!" the bartender—Shenna—called as he sat down.

"Hey," he mumbled, placing a hand on his eye.

"Nasty day, huh? Wanna talk about it?" Shenna asked, twirling her long back hair with a finger.

Shenna is pretty cute, but she also has a hot fiancée. He is pretty lovely.

"More like I want to drown it out. Can you give me the hardest shit you have?"

With a roll of her eyes, Shenna did so. "It's that bad, sweetheart?"

"Fucking kill me."

An hour later of drinking and chatting, Tom was totally shitfaced.

"Alright, that's enough for you." Shenna took away the shot glass. "Are you ready to spill the tea yet?"

Tom sat in silence for a couple moments before throwing his hands up in the air, almost tipping back. "Would it be that bad day if I was into guys?" he asked, eyes wide.

Shenna nearly choked on thin air. "Uh—no. Why are you asking me that, though?"

"I don't know!" Tom facepalmed, letting out a distressed whine. "You know... Torb?" he slurred, looking up at her with pathetic eyes.

"Tord? What about him?"

"I'm pretty sure I, like... like him," Tom admitted, planting his forehead on the table.

Shenna actually choked on thin air. "Like...? The guy you openly hate and fight with all the time? Your literal rival?"

A shrug. "You know how you taught me how to hide hickeys 'n shit?"

Alright, she doesn't like where this is going.

"He's been the one giving them to me."

"Holy shit, Tom, you queer fuck," Shenna said, sighing. "Tom... there's nothing wrong with being bisexual, or biromantic. Do you think he's attractive?"

"He's hot as fuck." Tom glanced up at her.

"Okay, Tom, you're probably bi. There's nothing wrong with that. Why are you so concerned about it?"

Tom pointed a finger at her. "Internalized homophobia... also, my parents might murder me."

Shenna blinked. "I thought your mom was nice?"

"My birth mom is nice. Super accepting and whatever. But after my real dad died, she got me into this really nice foster family or whatever that I grew up with. They let me keep in contact with her, so that's nice, but... they're also super, super, super religious. It's really hard to get that out of your head, ya know?" Tom slurred, looking up at her with wide eyes.

Her face softened, reaching over and petting Tom's hair. "It's alright, Tom. Adam—my fiancée, cuz he's pan—grew up with Catholic parents, and they never really accepted his sexuality. They ended up getting over themselves, and I think they had to try to do that, so I am grateful for that. But, even if you love your parents, Tom, they should love you for who you are, not for who they want you to be."

"That's... actually some good advice." He tilted his head. Then he shrugged. "I dunno, Shenna. Last time I thought I was into a guy, I got my ass beat, which says somethin' cuz I know how to brawl."

"Wait, how long has this been in your mind?"

"Since my teenage years. Jesus, Shenna, you think I have sex with a guy once and turn gay?"

"That's not what I said!" Shenna hissed, only to calm when she remembered how drunk Tom was. "Look, Tom, like I said before, it's okay to not be straight."

Tom sighed. "I know." He opened his mouth to con—

"Aye, sugar tits, can you come get me my fucking drink now?"

Tom whipped his head around, ready to jump to her defense.

"Aye, neckbeard, can you get your head out of your ass and realize I can kick you out for that? I will poison your drink with Botulinum toxin, asswipe."

Tom couldn't help but laugh.

feel free to leave a comment! they make my day :)