1936 - nineteen

Bucky and I leaned against a bar, celebrating the Fourth of July and Stevie's eighteenth birthday. He was now of legal age to drink, Bucky insisted we go out dancing so we could have something to take our minds off our sick mother.

I actually welcomed the break. It had gotten so much harder since she had come down with her sickness, doctors couldn't make heads nor tails of what it was and it was getting expensive for the many medicines she had to take. She could barely open her eyes, much less speak, there were good days when she would give me a soft smile, but then there the days when she'd stop breathing and I'd have to make her sit up to clear her airways.

It was stuffy and depressing in my own home and the economy wasn't making things much better, it'd been pretty bad before, but now it was worse. I had to work double time to make ends meet for the tiny apartment we lived in. That wasn't even counting the money we had to scrape together for Steve's medical issues or our Mother's prescriptions.

"Whatcha thinkin' about Peaches?" Bucky nudged my elbow lightly with his.

"Steve mostly" I sighed, watching as my brother moved through the crowd, he was much too small, half of it was because of his grocery list of conditions and the other half was because he never got enough to eat, neither of us did. Steve apologized as he bumped into people, clumsily making his way toward us.

Poor kid had worn out his only pair of shoes, we had to stick newspapers in them to make them last a little longer, my own weren't much better but we just didn't have the money to buy anything new right now.

"Listen Doll, I think we should go back to being friends" Bucky told me gently, drawing my attention back to him. It was almost a relief really, a relationship on top of everything else was hard to maintain. "I know it's a really crappy thing to do with your ma the way she i-"

I threw my arms around his neck, holding him closer and cutting him off. "It's okay Buck, I want to go back to being friends too" I sighed.

Our relationship had lasted all of four years, on and off again almost a dozen times, but this time had been different. It wasn't for us, I don't think, not much was different except we kissed sometimes, Bucky wasn't one to settle down and this wasn't the time.

I pulled back, smiling up at my best friend. "I agree, we need to take a step back and see other people"

He nodded "maybe when we're older" Bucky took my hand giving it a small kiss. "I'll always be your friend Peaches, promise you'll be mine too?"

"promise" I grinned holding up my pinkie, childishly sticking out my tongue when he rolled his eyes, although he did hook his pinkie finger around mine.

"What are you guys talking about?" Steve questioned when he bounded up to us.

"We broke up" Bucky summed, releasing my hand as we both stood up straight.

"Does that mean I have to pick sides?" Steve wrinkled his nose "because if I have to, I might have to beat up my best friend" he joked.

I cuffed the back of Steve's head, shaking my own as I grinned "there will be no fighting amongst the two of you, got it?"

Steve rubbed the back of his head, grumbling about annoying older sisters. "Fine fine"

"Hey, c'mon guys were supposed to be celebrating" Bucky lightly shoved Steve's shoulder. "Steve is now a legal adult"

"My baby brother is all grown up" I wiped a fake tear away, grinning when Steve rolled his eyes.

Steve leaned against the table about to say something when suddenly someone was being swarmed as they entered the bar. I caught yells of 'Stark' as bright camera flashes lit up the bar.

The famous Howard Stark could be seen as he smiled charmingly and flirted with the ladies. He pushed his way through the crowd of reporters as he looked around.

Stark saw our table, winking at me when we made eye contact. I rolled my eyes, turning my attention back to my boys.

"It must be somethin' to be that famous" Bucky commented absently as he watched.

"Yeah" Steve agreed.

"I don't think we'll ever really have to worry about that" I shifted on the table. "Did you know he's our age"

Steve's gaze snapped toward mine. "What?!"

"He was in my class when we were in grade school" Bucky nodded along.

I raised a brow "he was? How come I don't remember him?"

"Maybe because you were so focused of Steve you didn't notice him staring at you with stars in his eyes" Bucky smirked as my jaw dropped.

"No way, I don't believe it" I shook my head, sneaking a glance at Howard, who was now seated across the room, his arm thrown around a brunette as he laughed at something someone across from him said.

"Believe it" Bucky called my attention back to him. "Except I moved in before he could" He added with an air of smugness "although his crush didn't influence my decisions" Bucky was quick to assure.

"I still can't believe I went to the same school as Howard Stark" Steve replied with awe.

"Hey" I snapped my fingers, making Steve look at me. "Stevie, he's just a normal guy, one who just so happens to have invented something"

"Yeah but he's still cool" Steve defended.

"I agree with Steve" Bucky shrugged when I shot him a look.

"Thank you" Steve grinned. "See, someone who sees sense."

"Whatever" I huffed. "Didn't know you boys were going to gang up on me today."
I glanced at the clock on the wall behind the bar and internally sighed. "Alright, Stevie we have to go home" He nodded, moving to go get his coat. I turned to Bucky. "Bye Buck, thank you for this" I gestured around us.

He nodded, moving over to me and tugging me into a hug. "You ever need anything, you tell me, alright doll?"

"Mhm" I hummed, but we both knew I wouldn't. I haven't accepted much help in the past, and I wouldn't now.

I pulled away, giving my friend a smile.

"You okay walking home?"

"Yes, I have Stevie, we can handle ourselves" I assured.

"I'm sure you can, just worried" Bucky hugged me one more time. "Get home safe for me, okay?"

I nodded fondly at our little catchphrase. "We will Buck, promise"

Looking around for my lost brother, I smiled when I found him, he was waiting by the door, coincidentally lingering near Stark's table. Rolling my eyes, I walked in that direction.

"Ready to go?" Steve asked as I approached.

"Laura Rogers is that you?" Howard Stark called from his table. I gave him a small nod and a friendly wave before taking Steve's offered arm.

We exited the bar together, the New York air was cool as we neared the middle of the summer.

"Laurie, what are we gonna do when mama..." Steve asked quietly.

"We'll mourn her just like mama did for papa. Mama's boss most likely will stop helping us when she passes. You will continue to be a kid and I'll continue to work."

"But I can help!" Steve protested.

"Mama had the right idea when she didn't let us work in the factories. Besides with all your medical needs, there aren't a lot of jobs for you to do" I insisted, trying to ignore the mixed look of hurt and guilt on Steve's face. "I can do it Stevie, you just focus on staying alive and getting to art school."

"I hate that you have to do this on your own. We're supposed to be in this together Laura" Steve pointed out.

"And I'm supposed to protect you" I retorted. "I can't do that if I'm worrying about you having an asthma attack or you fainting"

"That happened one time!" He defended

"One time too many, and it was after you pushed your body too hard" I took a deep, calming breath. "We shouldn't be arguing. It's your birthday after all"

"Change of topic, I can do that" Steve paused for a moment, shifting himself to walk between the street and myself. "I can't believe you and Bucky broke up"

"It's for the best, we've decided to take a step back and just be friends." I sighed. "Maybe in the future if we're both still wanting to start a relationship, we will."

"Not that it's any of my business, but I think you guys are going to get married one day"

"Have you been talking to mama?" I rolled my eyes, tugging on Steve's arm slightly.

"What? No"

"Its just mama said almost the exact same thing to me the day Bucky and I started going steady."

Steve laughed, it wasn't just a small one, no it was a full belly laugh. I hadn't heard one of those in a long time. "It's because you and Bucky are the only ones who can't see that the two of you are perfect for one another. You guys are soulmates" he said, practically wiping a tear from his eye.

"there's no such thing" I shook my head.

"Deny it all you want, but Bucky has been there for you since the day the two of you met, and he helped you with me."

Sighing, I turned my attention on the sidewalk in front of me. "Steve we tried, for four years. But we just don't work. We're better off as friends. People can say what they want, but Bucky and I won't make it romantically"

Steve was silent for a moment, before he nodded. "I see that. Maybe you aren't meant home to be together, but the two of you are peas in a pod. Even if it is just platonic"

"Exactly." I agreed as we started walking up the winding stairs toward our old apartment. "Now, we should check on mama"

I pulled the hidden key out from behind the loose brick, unlocking the door before putting it back. Our home was dark inside, the lack of noise didn't sit well with me.

Hurriedly, I made my way to mama's room, her door was wide open, she stared at the ceiling as she breathed quietly, something that hadn't happened in almost two years.

"I can see it Laura" mama called out deliriously. "Joseph is waiting for me" her quiet suddenly burst into a fit of coughs. I stepped toward her.

"Mama no, it's just a dream" I cooed, sitting at her side and taking her hand in mine. "Papa isn't here." I could see Steve standing in the doorway, the same heartbroken look on his face that I imagined was on mine.

The bliss of the distracting night had faded the moment we stepped foot back into our apartment.

Mama's eyes drifted closed, her ragged breathing returning as she took deeper breaths. I sighed, adjusting her blanket to make her as comfortable as possible.

I needed to go out and look for another job tomorrow. My last one at the library had fired me because they didn't have enough money to continue to pay me.

"How much longer do we have to watch her suffer like this?" Steve asked quietly as I shut mama's door behind me.

"The doctors have hope that she's gonna pull through" even as I said the words, I knew they were a lie. Mama had been sick for almost four years, if she were gonna improve, she would have done so already.

"And if she doesn't?"

"Then we mourn our mother" I repeated from our conversation earlier in the night. "It's late Stevie, go to sleep, I'll lock up the house"

He hesitated before nodding. Steve tugged me into a hug "thank you for everything Laurie."

"Happy Birthday Stevie" I replied back, before pulling away and offering my pinkie. Steve smiled before wrapping his around mine, just like when we were kids. "We're in this together."

"Together" he nodded again.