Juniper leaned her head against the fogged up windowsill, staring out at the snowy landscape flying by her.

"Oi!" Leo waved a hand in front of her face, "Earth to Junie."

"I'm here." Juniper smiled, snapping out of it. It was hard to clear her mind when Teddy was sitting right across from her.

"You went all space cadet on us for a second." Charlie chuckled, nudging her. Juniper laughed lightly, mind still wandering.

Teddy eyes flicked to hers, so brief that Juniper almost didn't catch it.

James sighed, chattering on about what he had been the whole damn train ride, what to get Rory for Christmas. He was adorably obsessive over it. "So should I get her something small? Or like-"

"Oh my fucking god-!" Vanessa poked her head in the compartment, groaning, "You're still on this?"

James chucked his gloves at her head, "Shut up Ness!"

"He realizes that it's never going to happen, right?" Vanessa turned to Juniper, arms folded.

"When has he ever?" Juniper giggled, smirking at a very irritated James. She noticed an odd, sort of sneaky, knowing expression on Teddy's face. What could that be about?

"This is important, you guys!" James protested, glaring at his sisters. "It's different! This is-"

"The year!" Everyone in the compartment chorused in unison, snickering.

"Trust me mate." Charlie raised his eyebrows, "We know."

"Well, I think we need to have a little more faith in James." Teddy patted his friend on the back encouragingly, "It's alright buddy, I believe you."

"Teddy is the only one in this family who loves me." James lamented morosely.

"See, " Vanesa couldn't resist, flashing a smug smile, "you don't need Rory. You already have a boyfriend."

The rest of them snorted, while James flipped Vanessa off, "Who invited you in here in the first place, you miniature gnome?!"

Vanessa sucked in her cheeks, eyes narrowing in challenge, "I just came in to let you know we're almost home, you moony eyed freak of nature." Before Vanessa ducked out of the compartment, snarling, she added, "Who's never going to get laid."

Juniper gave her sister a high five for that one.

"Junie!" James looked to her in betrayal.

"What?" Juniper laughed, "It was a good one."

"We shared a womb!" James clutched a hand to his heart dramatically.

"Well we share something even more important." Vanessa said, winking at Juniper.

"Oh really?" James rolled his eyes as the train halted to a stop, gears grinding on the tracks with a screeching sound. "And what could that possibly be?"

"An annoying arse brother." Vanessa smiled sweetly.

"Ooh same!" Rose popped up behind Vanessa, Evelyn and Ethan in tow.

"Me too!" Evelyn echoed.

"HEY!" Their brothers all cried reproachfully, offended.

The girls burst out laughing, while the boys just shook their heads, vowing to get them back.

"Now let's go!" Rose beckoned impatiently, "We've got to get Cali, slowpokes."

"Coming." Charlie said, everyone starting to grab their trunks from overhead and walk out the door.

Juniper made for the door, shouldering her bag.

"Er- Junie don't you have that thing you're going to help me with?" Teddy boomed loudly, stopping her in her tracks.

Juniper saw Vanessa and Rose whisper to each other out of the corner of her eye. Oh god they probably knew. She wouldn't put it past either one of them.

"Huh?" Juniper tilted her head in confusion, "I don't know-"

"Remember." Teddy pressed, everyone viewing him strangely, "I needed your help with that thing."

Juniper grew even more confused, shaking her head, "No I-"

"I can help you, Teddy." James offered, lifting a shoulder, "What is it?"

"No." Teddy grimaced, running a hand through his hair tiredly, "I really just need Junie's help."

"Okay..." Leo frowned, eyeing Teddy, "We'll be waiting at the station."

"Thanks." Teddy breathed a sigh of relief, "We won't be long."

"You are acting weirder than normal today, mate. I gotta say." James said. Slowly, everyone exited the train compartment, Juniper throughly bewildered.

Once the compartment was empty. Juniper turned to Teddy, completely lost, "What-"

However Juniper didn't get to finish her sentence because Teddy pressed her up against the wall, pinning her wrists and kissing her..

"Hi." He said when they broke apart, smirking.

Juniper bit her lip, "So that was what you needed my help with."

"Desperately." Teddy murmured, dragging his thumb along her cheekbone. "Now you see why James couldn't help me."

"Well-" Juniper started, eyes twinkling mischievously.

Teddy groaned, taking her face in both hands and kissing her, "Shut up!" His hands traveled down her body, resting around her waist as he pulled her tighter to him.

"You're a really bad actor, you know that?" Juniper teased, planting a kiss on his jaw.

"Well if you could take a hint!" Teddy fired back, lacing his fingers through hers.

Juniper swatted his arm, "No wonder Rory-" She paused, not sure if she should continue.

"Rory what?" Teddy withdrew from her, questioning. "Does she-"

"Yeah." Juniper nodded.

"Damn it." Teddy cursed, "Fuck. I knew she knew. She's too bloody perceptive for her own good. I-"

Juniper's heart ached again. Just a little bit. She knew that they had to keep it a secret. That it would get all kinds of messy if their friends knew. In her right mind, she knew that it was better for this to remain between them. Safer. But another part of her wished that she could tell everyone. However exciting the secretive hookups were, it was also tiring, keeping things from her best friends. Her family.

"She's not going to tell anyone." Juniper reassured, putting a calming hand on his chest.

"I'm sure- it's just this has to- you know- we can't..."

"I know." Juniper said softly, gnawing on the inside of her cheek and trying to prevent the hurt from affecting her. "We should probably go, they're going to wonder where we are."

Teddy's mouth met hers, long and slow, "One more kiss."

Juniper's body tingled, fingertips sparking with heat. Teddy had a way of making her forget she was angry or upset or anything. Especially when he kissed her like that. Teddy's mouth sometimes made her forget her own name.

"One more is going to turn into like twenty more." Juniper wagged a finger at him, turning her face to the side and walking towards the door.

"Well- that's entirely your own fault." Teddy wrapped an arm around her waist, not letting her go.

Juniper crossed her arms, "How do you figure that?" She scrunched her nose, pursing her lips.

"Easy." Teddy tilted her chin upwards, kissing her. "Besides the whole drop dead gorgeous thing, " He quirked one side of his mouth up, "you're you."

Juniper nearly died, as they continued kissing the whole way through the emptied train, separating only when they reached the outside. The space between them was physically taxing for Juniper, and she longed to hold his hand. For him to wrap her in his ams and show to everyone that he was hers and she was his. But- she wasn't his. And he definitely wasn't hers. Definitely not. Nobody tied down Teddy Lupin, and there was no way she could manage it even if it was possible.

"There you are!" Rose exclaimed, hustling them along. "Charlie and James were making fools of themselves, trying to flirt with Muggle girls."

"Annoying arse brothers." Juniper laughed, slinging an arm around Rose.

"Annoying arse brothers." Rose rolled her eyes, poking her tongue out at Teddy.

"I feel attacked." Charlie sniffed haughtily, their entire group journeying through the platform.

"Cali doesn't think we're annoying." James ruffled his younger sister's hair, "Do you Cali?"

Calista shrugged, round, apple cheeks pink in the cold and dimples showing as she smiled, "Eh, you're not so bad." Juniper admired her baby sister's sweet demeanor, she usually came off as shy, but Juniper knew Cali had some fire in there somewhere. A true Hufflepuff.

"She'll get there." Vanessa told them smartly, "Don't you worry."

"Have a good holiday, Ro." Axel Silvers voice came from behind them, the whole family watching as he chastely kissed Rose on the cheek.

The poor girl turned as red as her hair as Juniper and Vanessa wolf whistled. Charlie's entire face contorted, eyes darkening with anger, he growled, "What the fuck-"

Juniper socked him in the arm, hard.

"Oi! What was that for?!"

"You know exactly what." Juniper restrained Charlie with difficulty, while he tried to charge after Axel, already lost in the crowd.

"Were you planning on-" Charlie rounded on his sister, who promptly silenced him.

"Not talking about it."

"But-"

Juniper slapped a hand over his mouth, muffling any overprotective crap he was about to spout. "He'll be shutting up now, Rosie."

"Mmph!" Charlie huffed sulkily, and Rose looked to Juniper gratefully.

Juniper enjoyed these rare moments when she actually got to be a big sister. Rosie, Nessa, and Evelyn were barely a full year younger than her, and sometimes she felt as if they were the older ones, and not the other way around. Especially Rose and Vanessa, they'd just always been so independent. And Evie was so withdrawn it was hard to even get close with her. Cali, Cali was so much younger than her that it hadn't really been an issue. She'd been babied by everyone, she still was.

But she had to admit it felt nice to help them out. To be someone they could ask for advice. She was the oldest girl in the family, after all. And she certainly knew what it was like to deal with overprotective shit. That was kind of her area of expertise. Unfortunately, even with Juniper's intervention, Rosie was looking at a long road ahead of her.

They took the Floo network back to the house, greeted at the Granger Weasley house with a big welcome home dinner. They ordered in, don't worry, Ron was still permanently banned from the kitchen.

Her mother was not there.

Snippets of conversation floated down towards where Juniper was seated, sandwiched between Leo and Charlie.

"Honestly, Ron! You've got food on your face." Hermione to her husband, clucking her tongue.

"Is it better than dirt on my nose?" Ron offered through mouthful of food.

"You should've known not to order chicken wings, Hermione." Juniper's father goaded.

Rose, "Charlie I swear to god if you don't hand me the bread in five seconds, I will eat you!"

"...I'm legitimately going to strangle you." Vanessa brandished her fork at James aggressively in response to him flicking mashed potatoes on her hair.

"Dad! Nessa's trying to murder me!"

"At least if I go to Azkaban I won't have to see you!"

James threw more mashed potatoes at Vanessa's face, some splattering on the table. Juniper hid her laughter behind her hand, thankfully her Aunt Mione was too distracted to see. Then some hit her arm, "James!" She shouted.

"Kick his arse, Ness." Ginny said, urging the girl forward.

"Aunt Gin!" James cried.

Mateo took a bit of the mashed potatoes on his thumb and carefully wiped it on his wife's cheek, grinning at James, "I've got your back, James."

"You're going to regret that." Ginny's eyes gleamed with competition, and from then on, it was all over.

A full on food fight broke out, and the men definitely got the worse end of it. Juniper was covered in potatoes and spinach and he hair was all sticky. She was whole heartedly looking forward to taking a shower on her oen home as they said their goodbyes and walked up the lane to the Potter house.

Juniper was surprised to see Teddy follow them, bags in hand "You're staying with us?" She asked, running a hand through her matted tangles.

"Yeah." Teddy answered, "Is that a- problem?"

"What? No- no of course not-" Juniper stammered, flustered. "Just- what about Sirius and Evelyn?"

"They're visiting my grandmother."

"You didn't want to go?" Juniper questioned. How odd.

"I mean- not really." Teddy sighed heavily, downcast. "Everytime I there she either cries or tells me how much I look like my parents. Or both. It's just sort of depressing."

Juniper was quiet for a moment, "Wow, Teddy I'm sorry- I didn't-"

"It's fine." Teddy brushed her off, "I'd rather be here." He glanced around furtively, making sure there was no one in earshot. "With you." He whispered, close to her ear, his fingers just barely skimming her own as they walked side by side.

The moment was cut short far too quickly, arriving at Juniper's door. She headed inside.

"Hey Junebug."

"Mum!" Juniper exclaimed, dropping her bags in shock.

"Told you I'd be home for Christmas." Miranda smiled, and Juniper noted the dark circles ringing her mother's eyes. She looked thin. Too thin.

"Well you've missed everything else." Juniper mumbled sourly, more to herself than anyone else. But her mum heard it.

Harry, oblivious, approached his wife, eyes misty. "I missed you, Mandy."

"Missed you too." Miranda replied, "Although your appearance is slightly off-putting." She gestured to the copious amounts of food that they'd each tracked into the house

"Too bad." Harry said, "I'm kissing you anyway."

Juniper averted her eyes as her father dipped her mother. Though she guess it was nice things were back to semi normal. She remained cross at her mum, however. She'd just missed so much this year. And she was always so hard on Juniper.

She took a pleasurable, hot, shower, eternally grateful for the power of water heaters. She even got most of the food out of her hair. The snow fell steadily outside her window as she slipped on sweatpants, a jumper, and a pair of fuzzy socks. It was late, the house quiet and still. She could hear the snores of her brother echoing from his room. It was exhilarating, knowing that Teddy was right in the other room. Even though he'd spent the night in James's room a million times, it was different now.

Juniper decided to go downstairs for a cup of hot chocolate, she wasn't quite tired yet. She shivered a bit, rubbing her arms as she traipsed through the drafty lower floor. There wasn't any heat down there besides the fireplace, which was off. When she arrived in the kitchen the light was already on.

"Teddy?"

"Missed me that much?" Teddy grinned cockily from his spot at the kitchen island, "You just had to come looking for me, eh Potter?"

"As if." Juniper scowled at him, busying herself with boiling water. "I wanted hot chocolate."

"Lies." Teddy came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and propping his chin on her shoulder. "You wanted to kiss me."

"Shut up you arrogant prat." Juniper elbowed him out of the way, hoping the dark was hiding her blushing cheeks.

"Ooh a shut up and name calling." Teddy licked his lips, "You really want to kiss me."

"Shut up!" Juniper whacked him with the spoon she was using to stir the pot.

"Sorry what was that?" Teddy teased, feigning confusion. Juniper knew exactly what he was trying to do. Quite often, when he was being annoying or she just wanted to leave him speechless, Juniper kissed him to shut him up. "I didn't quite catch-"

"It's not going to work." Juniper cut him off, "Good effort though." She ladled the hot chocolate into cups, handing one to Teddy. Teddy purposefully spilled bit onto her knuckle.

"You sure about that?" Teddy lifted her knuckle to his mouth, slowly sucking, kissing the liquid off. Juniper had to put her other hand on the counter to steady herself, and Teddy smirked in triumph, "Hot." He stated, eyes intense and locked with her own

Juniper exhaled shakily, lust flooding her senses, "Teddy-" She breathed warningly.

"Relax." Teddy said, mischievously, "I was only talking about the drink."

"I hate you."

"Oh did you think I was talking about you- did you-"

Juniper couldn't help herself anymore. She kissed him, practically catapulted herself into his arms as her legs hooked around his waist.

"Hot." Teddy repeated, trailing a line of kisses down her neck, butterfly soft. "For the record, I'm talking about you this time."

A shiver ran up Juniper's spine, electric and wonderful, "You better be."

"Goosebumps." Teddy noted, voice low. He pulled her tighter into him, "Is my kissing really that good?"

"Fuck you."

"Well that was sort of the general idea."

Juniper closed her eyes, a stupid smile spreading across her face. He was so unbelievably cheeky and oh god she was obsessed with it. "We should-" She managed between kisses, covering her mouth to contain a moan, "Oh- we should- we should really get to bed. We don't want to get- caught." With difficulty, she led Teddy up the stairs, shushing him giddily as he bent her over backwards across the railings to kiss her. "Teddy!" She whispered, once they reached her bedroom. "Someone's going to hear us!"

"You know you never asked me why I was in the kitchen." Teddy pointed out, threading his fingers through her hair.

"Why were you in the kitchen, Teddy?" Juniper decided to play along, wanting to get every extra moment alone with Teddy that she could.

"I was waiting for you." Teddy whispered, cupping her face in his hands. "Obviously it payed off." After a few more kisses, Teddy ceased his amorous activities, "I should- " He nodded to James's door, giving her a quick, last peck.

"Right." Juniper replied, fingers still intertwined with his. Neither moved. There was a beat. "Or-"

Teddy grinned, tightening his grip on her hand, "I like or." He leaned in to her, their noses almost touching.

"Yeah?"

"Or sounds perfect."

The holiday was passing extraordinarily quickly. And although Juniper was happy about the reprieve from school, the whole Teddy situation was starting to weigh on her. With everyone in the house all the time, it was literally impossible to get a second alone with him. There were the nights of course. But he was always gone in the morning, which usually made Juniper feel worse, and the boys had been having sleepovers at the various houses frequently so Juniper hadn't seen Teddy as much as she would've liked.

Viv had called the other day, asking if Juniper would like to come to a Muggle party with her, but Juniper hadn't responded. Her mind was just so foggy at the moment.

She felt like a seesaw. Teddy kept making her mind go back and forth, back and forth, up and down, up and down. He would be getting letters from lovesick girls, but then later he told Juniper she was going to get him killed one day, because he couldn't stop looking at her. He'd joke around with her like her best friend, and then kiss her senseless in a hallway. It was all very confusing and conflicting and Juniper's emotions were being all shaken up, like a blender on high speed.

And then she saw the way her parents looked at each other. How her uncles and aunts looked at each other. Christmas had been especially hard. Hermione and Ron snuggled by the fire in a warm blanket, Ginny and Mateo sneaking kisses like teenagers, and Juniper's own parents, dancing around the room to Christmas music. They all just loved each other, so much.

And all that had certainly set the standard high. Juniper found herself wishing for that connection with someone else, a relationship like the ones she'd grown up with. Then she remembered Teddy. What she'd agreed to, what she'd wanted to do. Casual. What she thought she wanted. Sometimes she could convince herself that she could be casual, she was just sixteen for chrissakes. She didn't have to find her true love or any of that crap. Now was the time to be free, make mistakes, shag, date for the hell of dating. She shouldn't care about connection. Casual seemed easy, fun, relaxed.

But Juniper was far from relaxed.

She wanted to be relaxed though. She wanted to make it work. So Juniper tried to clear her head, zipping up her black puffy jacket and going out in the nearby field to have a snowball fight. It was ridiculously cold outside, and the tips of Juniper's ears were red until Teddy gave her his hat to wear, tucking it neatly over her massive black mane.

She was too determined to feel cold, though. It was sisters versus brothers, and they'd already had a Quidditch match (which the girls had won), and there was no way they were giving up their winning streak, or their bragging rights.

A snowball flew past her head, the fresh powder soft beneath her feet. It was a bright day, sun reflecting off the icy ground. It was an intense battle...until it wasn't.

Juniper peered over the snowbank her and Rosie were using to hide themselves, and realized that the boys were nowhere to be found. "Wait here." She instructed Rose, cautiously creeping gout into the open. To her surprise, not a single snowball flew her way. Where the fuck were the guys? THey'd never miss an opportunity to take her out.

Unless...

Juniper sighed when she saw her suspicions were correct.

Girls.

A whole gaggle of them, Muggle tourists she thought, from their bright snow bunny outfits. They stood a little ways away at the old stone bridge. She could hear the gales of lilting giggles from here. Charlie, James, Teddy, and Leo all looked very pleased with themselves, and it made Juniper want to punch them each in the face.

Huffing, she marched up to where the boys were leaning to look cool. Her boots stomped irritably in the deep snowdrifts, and she was full aware of how ridiculous she looked with her wild, snow covered hair. But guess what? She didn't particularly give a fuck.

Her blood boiled when she saw a particularly bold girl put a hand on Teddy's chest, while another pretended to slip on the ice and fall into James's arms.

"Hi!" She said brightly, once she reached the bridge, her gaze stone cold.

The girls all viewed her with mild disgust and annoyance, looking her up and down judgmentally. The guys shuffled sheepishly, pointedly staring at their shoes.

"Who are you?" One girl asked, beady eyed.

"I'm Juniper." She answered briskly.

"Are you like dating one of them or something?" The distaste dripped off her words, as she twirled a platinum blonde curl around her finger..

"Ooh definitely not." Juniper grimaced, and she went down the line, "Twin brother, cousin, basically cousin, Teddy." She turned to the girls again, who were very disgruntled at having their flirting interrupted, "Look, I'm sure you're all very nice girls. The problem is...these are not the guys you want date. I promise."

"How do you know?" The blonde girl said obstinately, pouting.

"Let's see." Juniper tapped her finger to her chin in thought, "Why don't we start off with James? Yes? Good. Most importantly, he's been obsessed with the same girl since he was eleven. Eleven. No one really has a shot. And despite the fact that he's been turned down several times, he continues to pine away. He writes poetry about it. Really bad poetry."

"I'm going to kill you." James hissed under his breath, and Juniper moved on to Leo.

"Now Leo is great, very smart, very sarcastic, a nice guy. Unfortunately for you ladies, Leo has a boyfriend." Juniper winked at Leo. "Charlie. Charlie once burped God Save the Queen. I feel like that's self explanatory. Oh! And he still sleeps with night light."

"Junie!" Charlie exclaimed, eyes wide and wincing.

"And last but not least, the infamous Teddy Lupin, who will shag you and never speak to you again." Juniper was joking, and then she wasn't. She knew Teddy felt it too, but he tried to laugh it off. Juniper swallowed, inhaling deeply, "Thank you for playing ladies, but I'd run out of here as fast as I could if I were you. And these boys have a snowball fight to get back to." The girls were still standing there, slightly dumbstruck. "That's right, girls! A snowball fight! Like they're five years old!" Juniper raised her voice, shooing them away.

When they had all scurried in the opposite direction, the boys rounded on her.

"Was that really necessary?" Charlie folded his arms.

"Yes." Juniper said simply. "You just left me- I mean- you ditched the snowball fight!" Juniper knew that wasn't really what she was talking about. She knew her frustration stemmed from something else entirely, and that she was being unfair, but she couldn't help it. It had been building up inside her the whole holiday, and it had to explode sometime. This just happened to be the tipping point.

"You're really this angry about a stupid snowball fight?" Leo asked skeptically

She continued, refusing to meet Teddy's eye, "Yes I am! I'm disappointed in you- in all of you. Especially you James!"

"Me?! Why me?"

"You like Rory, you shouldn't be flirting with other girls-"

"But I-"

"There are real feelings involved." Juniper ranted, raged, not letting anyone else speak, "You should never just string a girl along for fun- people get hurt- you shouldn't- you just shouldn't!" Poor James. It wasn't him she was upset with.

The boys blinked at her, bewildered.

Juniper threw her hands up in defeat, "God- I'm just done okay! I'm going inside!" She stalked back to the house, furious.

The minute she entered the house, she dialed a number, "Viv? Yeah, I changed my mind. Count me in for that party tonight."

fun chapter for me to write

the next one will have some DRAMA and some heart to heart stuff as well
last chap before we head back to school which may bring a few surprises...wink wink

then again what do i know

i'm just the writer ;)

ranting ———————————>

don't forget to comment and vote!

love you all

colleen