Not So Easy - Pansimione

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Hermione sat in her room, taking a breath to calm herself down. She had finally found a name that she felt fit her, so she thought it was time to tell her parents. She hoped that her parents were more accepting than her classmates. Also, she was about to start a new school where nobody knew her (she had already memorised most of her new school books), so nobody would be as hateful.

Hermione walked downstairs to see both of her parents in the living room, perfect, she didn't have to go and get them.

"Harry, is something wrong?" Her mother asked, looking at her with worry at the nervous and overly serious look on her face.

"Actually... I need to tell you both something." Hermione said, preparing to tell her parents what she had known about herself for a long time now.

"What is it?" Her dad asked, shifting in his seat to look directly at her, same as her mother.

Hermione took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down, telling herself that her parents would accept and love her no matter what.

"Mum, dad... I have been feeling this way for a... really long time now." Hermione started to explain to her parents. "I'm not a boy, I'm a girl. I'd like it if you call me Hermione, not Harry."

Hermione's parents were silent for a moment, looking at each other, before looking back at Hermione who was very worried that they weren't accepting accepting her, before they both walked up to her, giving her a hug.

"We love you, Hermione, nothing's going to change that." Her dad said, still hugging her.

"We may still mess up sometimes, but we'll try our best. This is all new to us." Her mother said, looking down at her daughter.

"Thank you..." Hermione whispered, grateful that her parents not only accepted her but were actively trying to get her name right.

Now that that was out of the way, Hermione and her parents spent their time looking into the possible ways to have Hermione transition. In the end they went for the magical way as it would take the least time, which was running out before she had to go to Hogwarts. In addition to that, it would also be possible to make her hair longer at the same time.

It was time, Hermione was at the station in the new clothes her mum had gotten with her on a girls day out, her hair long and bushy like her mother's in old pictures and she was about to get on the Hogwarts Express.

She felt relieved, knowing that nobody was going to question her for being a girl or having long hair and wearing skirts, (she would probably go back to trousers eventually, but for now she wanted to wear dresses and skirts and her mum loved going shopping for them with her) unless they didn't know what those were.

-----

Another young girl was glad to be getting on the Hogwarts Express, but for a different reason.

Her hair was short, black, and straight, unlike her. She had known for a long time that she only liked girls in any way close to romantic (she hadn't experienced sexual attraction yet though, she knew what it was because everyone learnt about it in year 5, but she was too young to think anything about it but "gross"), but she also knew her parents would never accept her for it.

For the whole summer her parents had been trying to get her with a pure blood boy who was admittedly handsome, and mildly feminine, but she just had no interest in him and never would. He was perfectly nice to her, never implying that he wanted them to do anything together, all they ever did was talk.

As it turned out, his parents were trying to do the same as her parents, so neither of them wanted to be there, but they made the most of it and became friends. Pansy never told him about her sexuality, but he never pressed it.

Pansy was hoping to find love while at Hogwarts, it was somewhere that her parents wouldn't know what happened as long as she was careful. 

She was sitting on the train in an almost empty compartment, looking out the window and zoning out, when she noticed a nervous looking girl walk onto the platform. She had long bushy brown hair, wearing a long pleated skirt and a long jumper that was over her hands as she looked around at all the people.

"She's so cute" Pansy muttered to herself, looking at the girl through the window as she made her way to the train, looking awkward and uncomfortable. Pansy silently hoped that the girl would join her in her compartment, but no such luck.

However, someone did join her, the boy her parents had been trying to get her with entered the compartment with two boys and they sat down around her, no way she could be in a compartment with just her and the mysterious girl.

"How are you Pansy?" He asked, a monotone voice clearly masking either a crush or something that happened with his parents.

"Alright, you Draco?" Pansy asked, looking back out the window, waiting for the train to start moving.

"Same as normal." Draco said, briefly glancing at a dark haired boy who was walking past, which Pansy noticed, a tiny smile on her face.

-----

Hermione had found herself a compartment. She had finally managed to find one close to the door she entered the train through. There was already a boy (they looked like a boy, she wasn't sure) sitting in there, but they didn't look like they noticed her when she walked in. He was looking everywhere for something before he walked out, his stuff still in the compartment, so she assumed that he was coming back. She sat down and took out a book to read until they got there or when she finished it, whatever came first.

The person came back, looking like they were ready to cry, making Hermione look up, closing her book and putting it down.

"Have you seen my toad anywhere? I've looked everywhere, but I can't find him." They said, sobbing as he tried to find that toad.

"I'm sorry, I haven't seen a toad, but I can help you look if you want?" Hermione said, standing up and going over to the person. "I'm Hermione Granger, you?"

"N- Neville Longbottom." He said, trying to get a hold of his breathing. "Thank you."

"No problem, let's go." Hermione said, walking out of the compartment, Neville trailing after her.

-----

Pansy was sitting looking out the window, trying to ignore the two idiots Draco had brought with him into her compartment, they were guffawing over... something, she honestly didn't know what.

Pansy looked up as the door opened, feeling exhilarated as she saw the bushy brown haired girl at the door, her heart promptly dropping again as she saw the boy behind her. Was he her boyfriend?

"Excuse me, have any of you seen a toad? He's lost his." The girl said.

The boy had already been there to ask, so Draco just rolled his eyes, Pansy, however had sat up and tucked the short strands of her hair behind her ears, Draco definitely noticed, but didn't say anything.

"As we told him last time he came, we haven't seen a toad." Draco said with a groan.

"Sorry, we haven't seen a toad, had lots of chocolate frogs though, want one?" Pansy asked, holding out the box she had been saving to try to pull a prank on Draco or some unsuspecting muggle born.

"No thank you, and thanks anyway." The girl said, before leaving and closing the door, Pansy's arm dropping and turning back to the window, a grim look on her face.

"Which one?" Draco asked, while Crabbe and Goyle went back to whatever they found so amusing before. Pansy wasn't convinced they weren't drunk.

"What?" Pansy asked, not knowing what Draco was talking about, her mind having wandered to the beautiful girl who had just been there and how cute she looked in that jumper she was wearing earlier, and how good the black robes would look on her.

"Which one do you like? My guess is the girl, you weren't as nice when the boy came last time, you kept looking out the window." Draco said, looking at the slightly flustered tomboy in front of him.

"Who said I liked anyone?" Pansy said, Draco had known her for long enough now to know when she was being defensive, not that it was that difficult to see in this context.

"Oh come on, it's obvious. If you're worried about me telling your parents, I won't." Draco assured, going back to his book before saying, "I'm gay anyway."

"You are?" Pansy asked, looking at Draco in shock before she laughed slightly. "Wow, our parents really messed up Dray."

"Dray?" Draco asked looking at Pansy over his book, not moving his face and having one eyebrow raised that Pansy found almost comical.

"Your parents are like mine right?" Pansy asked, turning back to look at the passing scenery, they were far out of the towns and cities now, only the occasional quaint cottage with a range of fields or hills, the occasional view of the sea with swarms of birds fighting over goodness knows what. "Backwards not only in their views of muggles but also about sexuality."

Draco sighed, that was all the confirmation that Pansy needed to know she was right. "So why don't we pretend to date in front of our parents? We're already friends, right?"

"Sure, but don't get in my way with getting Po- uh... a boyfriend." Draco said, reading his book on advanced potions, what he found so interesting in there she didn't know, but whatever, to each their own.

"Boy... I'm lesbian! I don't like boys. I would never get in the way of you getting one, whoever it is, provided you let me get a girlfriend." Pansy said, laughing slightly, wondering if the birds were swarming around some poor unsuspecting child at the beach for something near the first thing and had just got a portion of proper fish and chips.

"Sounds like a deal... Pans." Draco said with a smirk, going back to reading.

"That makes it sound like I can cook." Pansy said, thinking about the disastrous outcome of the last time she tried to cook.

-----

Hermione hadn't meant to be rude, she knew that there was a famous wizard called Harry, and she knew that he would be in her year at Hogwarts... She just didn't expect... Well... Him. She thought that she would be able to deal with it, but it wasn't long before the memories of her dysphoria settled in her mind and she had to leave.

She was going to keep as much distance as she could between her and Harry while at Hogwarts, at least until she felt more confidant being herself.

At least, that had been the plan.

But here she stood, in the girl's bathroom having been crying her eyes out in a bathroom stall, confronted with a giant troll. She had read about them in books, but she had never quite gathered how much bigger than her it was. She had always pictured something just a little taller than her dad, but this?

The room, no, the whole castle, had always seemed far too big, dwarfing her and everyone else who set foot in there, no doubt she would get used to it though. The troll, however, made the room look tiny, and made her feel smaller than she ever had in the past, and there was nowhere to go.

That's when he came. Harry Potter, and Ron Weasley of course, but she had never had an issue with him, other than his messy attire and bad manners. She found herself far too glad to see the two boys that she didn't even realise they were in the girls' bathroom.

She was frozen as the two of them managed to fight off the troll, somehow managing what numerous trained wizards couldn't, while they were first years, and she hadn't done anything useful. All she had done was tell professor McGonagall the truth, that the two boys had saved her, even though she had been so rude to them.

After that they all became friends, and she would help them with school work, in part due to her guilt. It was part way through their second year that she stopped jumping when people called out to Harry, having to remind herself that they weren't talking to her, and they didn't even know she had ever been called that.

She liked girls, she knew that, and told her, once again, accepting parents after second year, not wanting to overload them with too much at a time. They took this as just a fact of life that was far less dramatic than the previous news she had given them, she could love whoever she wanted to.

-----

It had been three years, three years since Pansy first laid eyes on the cute little Gryffindor girl known as Hermione. She found out that Draco liked Harry Potter, not that she was surprised. The two of them had no idea how to flirt, their parents having terrible relationships to go off.

They had been joined by another Slytherin, another child of Death Eaters, who also had a crush on one of the Gryffindor golden trio. Unfortunately, none of this golden trio even seemed to look their way unless they were being rude to them.

Pansy was sitting on the train on her own, going home and dreaming of going back to Hogwarts early. She could never stand being with her family for long, but they always insisted on her coming back for Christmas, then she would pretend something came up at Hogwarts and she had to go back just to leave.

The door opened and someone walked in. Pansy just assumed it was Draco, so she didn't turn around until a voice that was definitely not his spoke. This voice was feminine and sounded unsure of itself, the voice of the cute brunette she had seen walk into the station so long ago now.

"Mind if I join you, Parkinson?" Hermione asked, not sitting down yet.

This made Pansy turn from the window to face the girl in front of her, turning her head so fast she was surprised she didn't hurt herself. Sure enough, it was Hermione. She had grown since first year, her hair long, but less bushy than it was before, still bushier than most. She was still wearing long sleeved jumpers, but they were more form fitting, showing the body that had matured a lot in the three years. She was wearing skinny jeans, rather than the skirts or dresses she had worn in previous years, and it looked good.

"Not at all, take a seat Granger." Pansy said, gesturing to the seat opposite and tried not to stare at the beautiful girl opposite her.

"Thanks..." Hermione said, looking like she wanted to say something else, but she didn't continue.

"No problem." Pansy said with a slight smile, looking away again, trying to not to look at her too much either directly or from the reflection in the glass.

"Can I ask you something?" Hermione said, looking at Pansy  directly, looking determined.

"Sure, what is it?" Pansy asked, turning to look at Hermione, trying to quell the blush rising on her cheeks.

"Well, I was thinking, the rivalry that our groups have is stupid. Why don't we become friends?" Hermione suggested, Pansy was frozen, she hadn't been expecting that.

"I... I would like that." Pansy said, smiling and trying not to blush.

"Great!" Hermione said with a big smile, looking so cute right now all Pansy wanted to do was to kiss her right now. "I think we should call each other by first names then, we're not enemies. Call me Hermione."

"Call me Pansy then." She said, smiling and holding her hand out to shake, which was returned.

The two girls talked about everything and anything, laughing and enjoying everything. They were eating sweets and discussing things from school work to their friends crushes.

"I don't know if he realises it, but Harry is almost always talking about Malfoy and I'm not convinced he hates him." Hermione said, with a slight laugh as she bit into a jelly slug.

"Well that's good, as Draco likes Harry and has since first year, he was so sad when Harry refused to be his friend." Pansy said with a smile.

The both looked at each other for a second, a smile forming on both of their faces as they realised that they were both thinking the same thing.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Pansy asked, seeing the look on Hermione's face.

"We should get them together!" Hermione cheered, gosh Pansy loved this girl. She only liked her more now that they were more acquainted, and her laugh was so cute!

"Yes!" Pansy agreed. "When we get back, operation Drarry is a go."

"Absolutely." Hermione agreed with a smile, her two larger front teeth on full display, not that Pansy cared, she was perfect in every way.

-----

It was time for them to leave, Hermione had really enjoyed her time with Pansy, she was such a kind person really and she was looking forwards to being closer friends with her. 

Hermione rushed over to her parents, a big smile on her face and a light blush on her cheeks that her mother noticed with a smile of her own. The drive home was filled with the small family exchanging stories of school, work, friends and home.

"Why were you so happy getting off the train?" Her mother asked, looking at Hermione in the mirror as a small blush formed on her cheeks. It was a light blush, but it was there.

"I managed to make friends with a pretty girl in my year." Hermione said with a smile, that her mother caught.

"Oh? Who is this girl?" Her mother asked, getting ready to take a mental note.

"Her name's Pansy Parkinson. She's a Slytherin." Hermione said, smiling to herself, the blush getting darker.

"She sounds nice. I want to meet her some time." Her mother said, noticing the blush and smiling. "I'm sure she will be just as sweet and polite as those two boys."

"Sure, I'll tell her next time I see her." Hermione said with a smile.

-----

Pansy's smile had dropped as soon as she saw she saw her parents, knowing that the next few weeks would be hell. She briefly glanced to Hermione, seeing her happily run to her parents, feeling jealous of her perfect family.

Pansy walked slowly to her parents, shuffling her feet as she went, wanting to be as slow as she could. She knew that her parents would be disapparating with her. She hated it, feeling as though she was going to be ripped apart.

That Christmas was the worst. It was made slightly better by Draco coming, and the two of them being left alone for a while. Pansy excitedly told him about her friendship with Hermione and their plans to get him and Harry together as there was no way that Harry really hated him.

"Oh... Um... Thanks, but you really don't have to." Draco said, not making eye contact with her. Pansy knew that something was up, but she didn't know what. Shouldn't Draco be happy about this?

"What do you mean?" Pansy asked, knowing that Draco still had a massive crush on Harry. "I thought you would be happy."

"I'm happy that you want to help, but it's okay." Draco said, making Pansy suspicious, but then their parents walked in so she couldn't talk to him about it.

It felt like he was leaving her out, which only made her feel more lonely then she always did when she was at home. She felt even more like she was alone in the world than she usually did, sitting in her room trying to do everything she could in her room, not wanting to go down to see her parents and have them accept anything about her.

It was a very happy day when Pansy was able to go back to Hogwarts. Her parents left her outside of King's Cross, believing that they were punishing her for not going out of her room for pretty much the entire holiday, but honestly she was glad.

-----

Hermione was walking into King's Cross, hoping to get some extra time studying in the library as the books there were very interesting. She had been so focused on the books she was going to read that she didn't notice who she walked past.

"Harry?" A masculine voice from behind her called out. Hermione just ignored it, becoming accustomed to people talking to Harry rather than her when that was called out around her, but he wasn't there.

"Harry!" The voice called again, this time much closer and more aggressive.

This alerted Hermione that they were talking to her, that and the hand that hit her shoulder. She jumped, looking behind her to see a boy she used to know. He had always been talking to her and been the person who was the most transphobic whenever she tried to see if they would accept her.

"Harry! Stop ignoring me!" The guy said, Hermione was trying to walk way, but he was holding onto her arm. "Why are you wearing girl clothes?"

"I'm sorry, I'm Hermione." She said, trying to get away.

"Don't lie to me, I know you're Harry." He said, Hermione was starting to feel her old dysphoria come back and she couldn't handle it.

"I'm not called Harry, please leave me alone." Hermione said, breathing hard as she tried to convince herself that he wasn't going to keep pushing it.

"I told you to not lie, Harry, you are Harry Granger. Why are you wearing girl clothes? And why do you have long hair? You look like a girl." He laughed at her, noticing how uncomfortable she was, but not caring.

"Please leave me alone, I have somewhere I need to be." Hermione whimpered, trying to get her hand away from him, but his grip on her wrist was tight, in fact, her blood supply was getting cut off.

"Good for you, but answer my question, Harry." He said, almost enjoying how uncomfortable Hermione was at this point. He thought he was embarrassing 'Harry' for wearing girls clothing.

-----

Pansy had walked into the station to see Hermione looking close to tears and a boy she had never seen before holding onto her. Pansy was worried and went over, hearing Hermione's pleas for him to let her go and leave her alone so she rushed over.

"Hey, leave my friend alone, dude!" Pansy yelled, rushing over to the two.

"Who are you? Harry, you're friends with your this crazy chick?" The guy said, laughing at Pansy as though she was a joke.

"1, her name is Hermione, 2, yes we're friends, not that it's any of your business. Let's go Hermione." Pansy said, pulling the guy's hand off, and walking away with Hermione, holding her hand.

"You're crazy." He yelled after them as Pansy stormed off, showing him the middle finger as they left.

When they were on the train, Hermione broke down crying. Pansy didn't quite know what to do, so she just held Hermione close in a hug, rubbing circles on her back as she waited for the other girl to calm down.

She wished that she had gotten there sooner so she could have saved Hermione from this heart ache, but she couldn't change the past. There was no spell or potion for that, and she could make up for it by just being there for her now.

They were about half way to Hogwarts when Hermione had finally calmed down. The trolley lady had been to their compartment a few times and Pansy had bought sweets for her, and the trolley lady had been kind enough to give her a few extra.

"I talked to Dray over the holiday about operation Drarry, but he started acting weird, I know he's keeping something from me." Pansy said, trying to change the subject.

"Strange. Maybe we should follow the two of them." Hermione suggested, to which Pansy agreed.

The rest of the train ride was spent telling each other about good things over Christmas and some funny childhood stories. Hermione was back to her normal, happy self, for which Pansy was glad about. She didn't ask what was going on with that boy, it was none of her business, and she could figure it out for herself anyway. Hermione was the bravest kind of girl, no wonder she was in Gryffindor.

-----

They were almost at Hogsmeade station, Hermione said, "Oh, and my parents invited you to stay with us over Easter or summer if you want?" 

"What? I mean, thank you so much, I would love to, but why?" Pansy asked, not used to having invites that didn't have ulterior motives behind them.

"Because my mum really likes meeting my friends." Hermione said, smiling brightly.

"Oh, well please tell her that I would be thrilled to come either, or both!" Pansy said, smiling in a way Hermione didn't think she had seen before, she looked good.

"Why are you so cute?" Hermione whispered to herself, not realising she said it aloud.

"What?" Pansy asked, a blush on her cheeks, she looked adorable, especially now her hair had grown out to just past her shoulders.

"What?" Hermione asked, jumping at the implication she had been caught.

"You said something." Pansy said, looking at Hermione in the eyes, making a blush spread on her cheeks.

"I- um..." Hermione said, trying to think of an excuse before going with the truth, "I said that you're cute."

It was Pansy's turn to blush, hers a lot more obvious on her pale skin, almost akin to Draco's concerningly pale skin, than Hermione's much darker skin.

"Y-... You think I'm cute?" Pansy asked, feeling the heat on her face.

"Um, yeah... I have thought so for a while. That's why I asked to be friends..." Hermione said, playing with her long, dark brown ringlets. "I'm sorry..."

"No!" Pansy said, more loudly than she had intended. "I mean... I think you're cute too, I have since I first saw you walk onto platform 9 3/4 when we were first years."

"You... You did?" Hermione asked, feeling the compartment getting warmer, as well as a significant boost to her confidence.

"Yeah..." Pansy said.

There was a moment of silence while the two girls tried to figure out what to say next, both of them red faced from embarrassment.

"I like you!" They both said, eerily in sink.

There was another moment of silence, Hermione opening the window to cool them both down a bit, before they both sat facing each other, blushes firmly on their faces. Crookshanks was silent for once, almost enjoying watching the scene unfold.

"Do... Do you want... To be my girlfriend?" Pansy asked looking up at Hermione, tears rising in the brunette's eyes.

"Yes, Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend." Hermione said, tears of joy spilling down her face. She was happy for two reasons, one; she was in a relationship with her long time crush, two; she was their girlfriend.

Pansy pulled her into a hug, knowing from the genuine smile on her face meant that she was happy, rather than the misery she had been feeling earlier, with pain she would never know.

When the train reached the station, they took a carriage together back to Hogwarts, where Hermione ran off to write to her parents that Pansy would come at Easter (and hopefully over the summer) as well as the good news about her being a girlfriend to Pansy.

Hermione felt as though she was on cloud 9 for the rest of the day, however some interesting news came to light when she told Ron and Harry about her relationship status.

"Um, Harry, Ron, I need to tell you something." Hermione said, leading the two of them to an abandoned classroom.

"Sure 'Mione, what's up?" Ron asked as he and Harry followed her.

"I'm in a relationship with Pansy." Hermione said, after taking a breath to calm herself. "...Parkinson." She added when there was no response.

"That's great Hermione!" Ron cheered, but Harry kept back, meaning that her heart was in her throat, surely he wasn't going to reject her, right?

"Yeah, well done." Harry said with a smile, but it was clear that he had more to say, so Ron and Hermione let him continue. "I actually have something to tell you both as well."

"Well go on mate, we won't judge, unless you killed someone... Unless they were a Death Eater, or they hurt 'Mione." Ron said, making Hermione eternally grateful for her friends.

"Draco and I have been secretly dating for a while now. We got together at the end of last year." Harry admitted, Ron's jaw dropped.

"I knew you didn't hate him!" Hermione cheered, Ron still stood there, dumbstruck.

"Merlin mate... I'm happy for you, but now I'm the only single one." Ron said, looking slightly downcast, but his joy for his friends was still clear.

"Oh, I can fix that, with Pansy's help, we might even get Draco in on it too." Hermione said, smiling at the two, slightly evilly making the boys worry.

-----

By the time it was the end of the year, the rivalry between the two groups was gone, replaced with love. Hermione's parents loved Pansy, practically adopting her as she had been kicked out by her parents after they found out she was both lesbian and dating a muggle born.

Blaise's crush on Ron was soon reciprocated, and they were the last to get together, but they were all just as happy as each other, although Harry and Draco still had to keep their relationship secret, until they finally were able to leave their houses, having a home with Sirius in 12. Grimmauld Place.

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