August 19th, 2014

            "When I write here, I feel so young, like this is the first time I've ever been around a girl. When I write in my other journals, which are sickeningly piling up higher and higher on the table, I feel like a monster. But when I'm not writing, when I'm just in the moment with her, I feel grounded. I don't really think O has any idea what she does to me; and I don't mean the way she gets in my head with just a look and helps me keep calm. She doesn't have much awareness of privacy, I have learned. While there is something absolutely refreshing about coming home to see her moving around the kitchen in nothing but a towel, I'm beginning to wonder how to tell her how attracted I am to her. I'm not the same person I used to be, back then it was easy. With O, I'm not sure how to approach her in this regard. I think... I'll let her approach me when and if she's ready."