Client: zoe___fl

How it felt when I was reading your book:

TITLE

A perfect choice! From a glance, it holds humour and romance realms from the sentence so good job on that!

BLURB

Your blurb is sweet. I understand that it is a fanfiction but the key to great fan fiction is assuming that you created the celebrities.

What the blurb could have been:

Random college students, or just roommates? Zayn Malik and Gigi Hadid despise each other but their circumstances force them to change their attitudes as Gigi fakes her marriage contract on her path to a green card.

I see it has some relevant tags as well. I would consider adding fake marriage as a lot of stories fall under that trope.

COVER

The cover is beautiful. Love the choice of colours you picked for your story. As far as the title is concerned, one can notice the clashing of the letter 'M' with the collar, maybe try reducing the size and shifting it more towards the right side to avoid overlaps. The author's name and the quote chosen is beautiful so good job on that!

PLOT AND GRAMMAR

1. Ellipsis is usually used in a sentence when one wants to denote a trail of thought. For such circumstances, only 3 dots are used.

Example: It's probably the most annoying feeling when your college life has been going so well... or maybe not, but it's okay I guess.

2. Dialogues

There were a few areas where commas were missing. Commas used to be a nightmare for me and there are still ways you can get around them.

Example: "You?! What the hell are you doing there," the cute guy asked as he put on his shirt.

What it could have been: "You! What the hell are doing over there?" The cute guy questioned me as he put on his shirt.

Example: "The language is pretty complex so give me a break." She says and I laugh.

What it could have been: "The language is pretty complex so give me a break," she says and I laugh at her outburst.

Example: "I think we should eat the pizza before it gets cold". I say moving back and trying not to look at him.

What it could have been: "I think we should eat the pizza before it goes cold," I advise whilst moving backwards and trying to avoid meeting his eyes.

A simple rule to remember the commas is if a word such as said, say, tells, told, or reply is used, the comma is placed at the end of the dialogue and before the inverted commas.

If the dialogue ends with an action such as questioning, turning around, standing etc., a full stop is used.

OVERALL

It was nice reading this fanfiction because since I am not always reading them, it was refreshing to come across really popular characters. I love that your characters have so much life in them.

Another piece of advice I would provide is maybe try writing your drafts on Grammarly so maybe it can catch the commas and capital letters.

I wish you good luck in all your future works and keep writing! zoe___fl ♥