Hey everyone. This collection is not dead yet and here I have something new for you. BUT this is about the death of a character. So if you can't handle it, please don't read any further. The next chapter will be funnier, I promise. But first of all, I hope you enjoy reading it.

The rope snapped deafeningly and the next moment I found myself lying on my stomach, leaning far over the cliff. Too far. I managed to grab Penny's hand at the last moment.

"I've got you," I said with relief when our eyes met. I wanted to pull her up, to back away, to do something so I could get her up, but I leaned too far over the edge. I couldn't get enough grip, let alone muster the strength to pull us both back. We needed help. "Call for help! Now!" I shouted to Mandy and Norman, who we were able to successfully rescue from the ledge before the rope frayed on the edge and almost dragged Penny into the depths. I heard Mandy talking into the radio and calling for help. "Hold on, Pen. The others are almost here," I encouraged her, but as if fate wanted to belie my words, her glove on her hand began to slip off a bit.

Fear filled me and I saw in her eyes that she realized it too. I wanted to grab her wrist with my other hand, but as soon as I let go of the edge of the cliff, where I had stabilized myself, I noticed that Penny's weight was pulling me down with her. I called out to Norman to hold my legs, then felt both children grab my ankles, but they weren't heavy enough or strong enough to provide a proper counterweight when I tried again, reaching for Penny's wrist to grab hold of without slipping myself.

"They're not going to be here fast enough..." Penny began and my eyes snapped back to hers. I saw tears welling up in it.

"No! They will and you will hold on!" I replied seriously and saw her take a breath as the glove slipped an inch more from her hand. I immediately tightened my grip, seeing that I was hurting her, but it would heal once we got her back up.

"Maybe I'll, but my glove..." she replied to me and again the glove slipped off a little more. My stomach turned, my chest tightened, naked panic took hold of me as I refused to admit the reality.

"No, no, no! I won't let go of you, Pen. Never," I stated, feeling my eyes begin to burn in my desperation. Tears streamed down my cheeks, just like Penny's. In contrast to me, she now smiled reassuringly. It was forced, but she did it. For me.

"Sam. It's okay," she said quietly, her voice choked because she herself hadn't yet come to terms with what was about to happen. The glove had slipped even further from her hand. Both of us were now curling our fingers and only holding each other by the fingertips. I heard Jupiter's siren approaching in the distance. Rescue was near, but yet so far away.

"No, it's not!" I protested, curling my fingers even more because I felt hers slowly slipping away from mine.

"I love you. Both of you. Don't forget that." Her voice was just a whisper. My throat tightened as I saw her sadness, melancholy for everything that she would no longer experience.

"Pen, no. Please..." I gasped, strangled, and tried to reach for her again, but stumbled. The siren could now be heard directly behind me and fell silent. Doors opened. The children excitedly explained what was going on. But none of that mattered. Her fingers slipped a little more."Please don't!" I begged quietly before she slipped away completely. I tried to grab her again, stretching myself even further over the edge to do so, feeling someone with more force throw themselves at me to hold me, while my gaze never left Penny, who had tears in her eyes, but without making a sound, she fell into the depths. "PENNY!" I screamed desperately one last time, as if that could save her - the moment she hit the bottom.

I jumped and gasped. My chest felt tight, my heart was beating so loud it was ringing in my ears, hot tears were streaming uncontrollably down my cheeks.

"That nightmare again?" a familiar voice asked worriedly from the darkness next to me, before I felt her snuggle up to me and lay her head on my shoulder. I put my arm around her and pulled her a little tighter, desperately searching for the comfort that I so desperately needed but that no one could give me.

"It's getting less," I murmured under my breath as I forced myself to breathe in a controlled manner and shake off the dream that came back to haunt me over and over again, leaving me a little more desperate each time.

"You should do something about it," she suggested quietly, and I felt her gently running her fingertips over my shirt-covered stomach to calm me down.

"I told you, it's getting less. Go to sleep now!" I asked her grumpy and also closed my eyes, hoping that it was enough and that she would understand once and for all that I didn't want to talk about it. Not with her and especially not with anyone else. No one would understand what I was going through and I was tired of the sayings that things would get better eventually. I used it as an excuse myself to get left alone, but it was always just a lie. It would never come true.

"Daddy?" I opened my eyes and suddenly sat up when I heard the frightened child's voice next to me, so I could take my little daughter in my arms and pull her onto my lap. She was my everything. I would endure anything for her. For her I even went through the hell called life.

"What's wrong, my darling?" I immediately asked her worriedly and pressed her against me as if she could disappear in the next moment. I knew I was overprotective, too clingy, but I just couldn't do anything about it.

"I saw her," she whispered softly in my ear and I listened.

"Who did you see, my sweetheart?" I replied confused and looked down in the darkness at my little darling, who looked exactly like her mother, even if I couldn't see it that well in the darkness. Only faint light from the night light in the hallway came through the open door.

"Mummy. In my dreams," she answered me as if it was the most normal thing in the world, while it only worried me even more. She saw her mum in her dreams far too often for my liking. Still, I was glad that she dreamed about her differently than I did. At least she still had nice dreams with her."She's worried about you." That, however, was new.

"Really? Why?" I asked my daughter in astonishment, wondering if the little one was noticing too much of how much I was suffering and processing it in her dreams in this way.

"Because you miss her so much. She tells you to look forward." Those weren't words a five-year-old girl would choose, and it made my heart clench. Could it be? The whole time?"Don't you look where you are going when you walk?" she asked and I couldn't help but smile as I gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"Yes, my darling. I always do," I answered my daughter's question truthfully. However, I couldn't follow her mother's request. It just hurt too much.

"I miss Mummy so much, Daddy," the little one sobbed quietly and clung to me even more. It brought tears to my eyes too. The pain never stopped, but it only pierced my heart more and more relentlessly when I saw how much my daughter suffered from the loss of her mother. A loss that I was responsible for because I couldn't hold her, couldn't save her.

"I do too, my darling. I do too," I confessed to my daughter, my voice breaking. I couldn't live with this guilt, couldn't live without it, and yet I had to, for the sake of my daughter. I had to be strong for her. She needed me.

"Hey little one, stay with us tonight," came the sound next to me as she took my little angel from my arms so I could calm down. I sniffled briefly while wiping the tears from my eyes with my hands before I also lay down again and covered my sunshine with my blanket, which was now between us. She immediately snuggled up to me again. Even if she liked and accepted the woman next to me, I was still her father and no one would ever be able to replace her mother, whom we both missed so dearly since one year - all three of us, in fact. "I can't replace your mummy, But I'm always there for both of you and will look after you, okay?" she then said to my little one and I felt a deep gratitude welling up within me. That was what brought us together and what would always connect us - that she was there for us in times of deep sadness and we helped each other get over it because we were all connected by the same thing - love for a person who's loss had torn a deep hole in all of our lives.

"Thank you, Aunt Annie," I heard my little one whisper, but her voice sounded so sleepy. I knew she had fallen asleep only a moment later before I noticed her breathing calming down. I also closed my eyes again and hoped for a dreamless night.

"Sam." That voice calling to me in the darkness was as familiar to me as I missed it sorely.

"Penny?" I called to her cautiously, prepared to find myself back on the cliff with her at any moment, reliving my greatest loss and, above all, my greatest failure. This was my punishment for the guilt I had incurred and I would have to live with it. But it wasn't the cliff that appeared before me, not our ride there in Venus, or Penny's face when I held her, which is how my dreams usually began. Instead, a radiant figure appeared before me, surrounded by a blinding light that slowly grew dimmer as she approached me. It didn't take long for me to realize who the silhouette I first spotted belonged to and my heart was pounding loudly in my chest. Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched her frozen as she walked towards me, only to end up standing in front of me and looking at me with her beautiful smile that was so full of love. She put a hand on my cheek and I couldn't hold back the tears any longer as I literally nestled into her touch."This is the first time I've seen you in my dreams other than on the cliff," I asked quietly firm, indescribably grateful that I was granted this.

"It's also the first time you realize you're dreaming at all," she remarked, and I realized she was right. These dreams always felt so real that I always didn't realize, until I woke up that I had only dreamed. The pain still remained the same. "I've been trying to get to you somehow since my death, but only our sunshine allows that," she then explained to me and for the first time something like concern stole into her gaze, whereas otherwise she only had a deep one radiated peace.

"Does that mean you really visit her? Every night?" So it was really true?

"If I can't make real memories anymore, why not have nice dreams?" she replied with a shrug before the smile disappeared from her face. "Why don't you let go, Sam? Your guilt is so strong that it's going to eat you up inside. You couldn't do anything about it and you couldn't change it," she then asked me seriously and everything came crashing down on me again - all the thoughts, accusations and feelings that had been haunting me for one year.

"I should have gone downstairs myself. I..." I started, but she didn't let me finish.

"But I've gone first. Would you have wanted me to suffer like you are now?" she then remarked and I imagined Penny suffering the same pain as me. I shook my head quickly. Of course I would never have wanted that."It's good, Sam. I'm fine here and I'm always with you. Every day I watch you and I'm happy that you're alive. I just wish you'd laugh more again. That you'd laughing again at all," she then remarked and put her arms around me and her head on my shoulder. I followed suit, holding her and burying my face in her neck before she pulled away from me again. Just enough to put her hand on my cheek and look me in the eyes with a smile. "Make me laugh, Sam. Only you could always do it so easily and so wonderfully," she then asked me with a smile and warmth filled me at the thought of her laughing, how we had teased each other and how much joy it had always given me to see her so happy. Nothing had filled me with more love and pride, especially when I had been the reason for her joy.

"Does that mean our life here on earth has now become a show for you, from which you expect a little more comedy?" I remarked skeptically, phrased it a little more jokingly and it had the desired success. She laughed and it sounded wonderful even in my dreams.

"You see, that's exactly what I mean," she said happily and snuggled up to me again. I was still holding her. If it were up to me, I would never let her go again. I put my face against hers and even though I knew that dreams weren't true, I felt like I could feel her warmth and breathe her scent, which I was so sorely missing in life."Be yourself again and enjoy this what you have. Take care of our daughter and enjoy the time with Annie. She is not me, so you shouldn't think of her as a replacement either. Tell her that she won't get closer to me by being there for you and playing family. You can be a real family if you both open your eyes and see each other as you really are," she then told me what we had to change in life. She was right and we both knew it too. Annie and I supported each other in our grief. We made each other feel like we were closer to Penny because she was her cousin and I was the man she loved, her soulmate, as Penny always said. She had been mine too, which is why I knew I would never be able to love anyone like that again. But maybe Penny was right and it was time to at least appreciate what we had in life. But still...

"I miss you so much, Pen. I'm afraid that if I let anyone get too close to me, except our angel, I'll betray you or forget you," I confessed to her with a sigh and again Penny backed away enough to put her hand on my cheek and look me in the eyes with her patient smile.

"You won't forget me, Sam, and you'll never betray me just because you're happy. I'm with you. In here. Forever and maybe when you finally let go and your heart feels a little easier, I also visit you every now and then," she then said as she placed her other hand on my heart and sealed her wonderful proposal with that teasing sparkle in her eyes.

"If that's a promise, from tomorrow on I'll only laugh so that you can haunt my dreams all the more often," I couldn't stop myself from replying, carried away by her exuberant mood.

"Ah, ah, ah! Remember that I also have a daughter. You'll have to share me with her," she admonished me with a grin as she wrapped her arms around my neck to look me in the eye. I could see how much she had missed this and how much she was enjoying it. At least as much as me.

"Nothing better than that. As long as I can at least see you again," I replied seriously again and couldn't resist kissing her gently.

"You may, Sam. But don't forget that life is what's really important. Enjoy every day, just like I will enjoy seeing every day of yours," she then reminded me again as I felt her pull away from me and began to remove. Reluctantly I had to let her go.

"I love you, Pen. Forever!" I called after her again, wanting her to hear it again in case I didn't see her again, while I felt a weight seem to be lifted from me, ever further she moved away from me. It was almost as if Penny had taken all the pain and guilt away from me, leaving me with a peace that was indescribable and fueled by the hope that this dream was not the product of my imagination but had at least some reality to it.

"I love you too, Sam. Forever. See you soon in your dreams," I heard her say before she disappeared again in a dazzling light as I slowly woke up.

THE END