" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

"You know, you should be grateful about this situation."

Darkness: What ?! Why would I be grateful about anything here ?!

"Because, there was a non-insignificant chance for Kazuma to be in my place right now."

Darkness: ... ... ... ...

"... ... G'night."

Darkness: Hey ! What ? Are you really just gonna sleep like that ? ... Y- You're... really sleeping ?

"... ... ... Were you trying to do anything ?"

Darkness: ?!... Zzzzzz... Zzzzzz...

"I know you're awake, don't try to pretend, you... Why is my neck damp ?

Darkness: Gh... !

"... Woman, were you licking my neck while I was sleeping ?!"

Darkness: N- No, you're wrong ! I didn't go that far ! Really, I didn't ! It's really not like that !

"Then how do you explain this ? You think after everything else, you need to hide something like that ? It's more the fact that you waited for me to be asleep that bothers me."

Darkness: Y- You're being too loud ! No... ! I really didn't do anything ! Um, I woke up to find my face buried in your neck ! Then, my drool inadvertently dripped onto it... ! I thought I should wipe it off, but when I see you chained to me with such a defenseless sleeping face... For some reason, a strong wave of shame and guilt washed over me... Then I got increasingly aroused and... !

"... I woke up facing you, Darkness. You weren't doing that out of coincidence. Well, I can tell my pants are still here, so you at least have some kind of restraint."

Darkness: I- I can't tell if you're proud or disappointed...

"Oh, I can tell for sure Kazuma would be disappointed in that. As for me, I know you enough to know you're quite the huge pervert yourself, but trying something on your own in the middle of the night ? That's something new. Honestly, I'm tempted to join Kazuma on this one and start to call you Slutiness instead."

Darkness: D- Don't do that ! Un... Uuu My heart started racing after being scolded and called a pervert and slut by you... Am I really hopeless... ?

"That's a tad bit too late to worry about that now, isn't it ? You've always been like that, ever since we first met."

Darkness: ... Thinking back, when I first met you, I didn't think I'd ever be in a position to chat about such crude topics with you. I was a woman of fewer words back then, even worse at socializing than I am currently... Furthermore, I was also more actively trying to keep my distance from you...

"Well, you are a noble lady... So you were most likely forbidden from getting close to anyone. If I'm being honest, my first impressions of you... I expected you to be some kind of up-tight knight, someone who would scold us and boss us around... I guess you passed as more... 'Mature' back then."

Darkness: Hehe... My first impression was that you were quite laid-back, always taking things in a way that wouldn't trouble you... Someone who would try of making everything into amusement...

"By the way you make it sound, it feels like you think i'm actually a complete monster without an ounce of humanity left..."

Darkness: That is exactly what I meant... ?

"Okay, I walked into that one..."

Darkness: ... back then, I was already taken by that lord. But you saved me from his clutches. You saved me and gave me freedom... So now all I wish is to be able to protect you, to provide you a blissful life. As long as everyone can live on like this, i'm satis-

"And you are just as stupid as you were back there..."

Darkness: H- Huh ?

"So you would sacrifice yourself ? Didn't you learn anything from all of that ? It's the same thing you tried with Alderp ! Don't just solve everything by sacrificing yourself ! You really think I went to these length just for you to try the same crap at the first problem ?! And not just me, everyone here !"

Darkness: ... I also... I like you too.

"I... Uhhh..."

Darkness: At first, it was something simple... Watching you become sadistic as you went on adventuring... But then, every time I see you face against all kinds of powerful enemies and come out victorious, I always makes me feel energetic and refreshed. The Demon generals who were stronger than you by orders of magnitude. If I start counting the number of times you've exceeded my expectations, it'll never end... When you tossed money at that corrupt Lord's face, I became truly obsessed with you.

Darkness: I like you. At first because you were sadistic and I was a masochist, so it was a perfect fit. However, as time went on... My type shifted to just you. No matter what you turn into, I would always like you.

"... It's about what Megumin's mom said, isn't it ? You're watching how Kazuma and Megumin are getting closer to each other, and now that worries you. You think you're not good enough..."

Darkness: Uhh... Uhhhhhhh....

"There, there. I guess even the mighty crusader needs to be cared for and protected at times, doesn't she ?"

Darkness: Sh- Shut up... *Sniff*

"... maybe getting chained together like that wasn't such a bad thing after all... I feel like we really needed that talk..."

Megumin: Th- This is not what I meant... That's not what I had in mind ! What the hell happened to the two of you tonight ?!

"Shhh... keep quiet. You're gonna wake her up..."

Megumin: Why are you letting her sleep on your lap... ? Why is Darkness showing such a peaceful face... ? Why are the two of you acting so lovey-dovey all of a sudden ?!

Kazuma: ... They've been ever since the festival. You just weren't able to realize it. Pretty sure they've been doing it on the regular.

Megumin: THEY WHAT ?!

*Click*

"Well, as pleasant as it was, i'm actually quite glad to be free from these things..."

Megumin: They what... They did... What the hell... When did...

Aqua: hey, I'm really sleepy. I already worked hard to find the key, so can I go back to bed now ?

Darkness: ... Huh... Did something happen... ?

"Nothing really worth mentioning. Just Megumin freaking out."

Aqua: Hmm ? Why are you acting so casual about this, Darkness ? Are you happy because you spent a night with this man ? You can't lose control of yourself like this. I know that you have some strange inclinations, but you should still respect yourself more.

Kazuma: That's really rich coming from you, Aqua. But guess what, I know full well how things will progress for a man in this situation. From now on, both me and Y/n will have a raucous lifestyle where Megumin and Darkness get our full attention. Then, when you are left alone, you'll end up feeling lonely and eventually realize what your true feelings are.

"Please don't drag me down to your level, Kazuma..."

Aqua: Hm hm. That I should have acted sooner to fix this dawn NEET and corporate villain ?

Kazuma: No, of course not ! You originally only thought of me as a housemate, but after this you'll slowly realize that you actually have romantic feelings for me. But sorry, Aqua, I just can't bring myself to see you as a romantic partner; I can only see you in the same way I see Emperor Zell or Chomusuke.

Aqua: Hey, hold on a minute ! Why do you make it sound like I was casually dumped ?!

"Because let's be frank, the moment someone becomes romantically interested in you, hell will freezes over."

Darkness: ... hey, I'll be coming back late tonight, so you don't have to make my portion of dinner or wait for me. I'll be staying over at my father' place...

"... I'll probably visit the Adventurer's guild myself today... Gonna see how that tax matter changed things, and make my new business clear. Anything you two plan on doing apart for lazing around ?"

Aqua: Don't make it sound like I have a lot of free time. I plan to take Emperor Zell to defeat monsters outside town today. I'll have him start defeating monsters from a young age and start accumulating experience points. If we start his education now, he might be able to swallow the entire Demon King's castle in a single gulp by next year.

"... All you'll get from this is your chick getting swallowed in one gulp, and I must be here to see it."

Kazuma: Hey, where did Megumin go ? She was here just now, wasn't she ?

Aqua: Oh, she just left. She said something about boasting about her victory as a woman to Yunyun.

"Victory as a... She's taking things too fast, too far, isn't she... ?"

Kazuma: 'I can't read her... She's telling Yunyun, but wants to keep it secret from Aqua and Darkness ?'

'I guess she knows Yunyun won't tell it to anyone else...'

Aqua: Oh, yeah, now's the time where the adventurer's guild comes in handy. I think I'll be accompanying you after all. i'll find some bored-looking people to help me raise Emperor Zell's level.

Kazuma: I really don't think there'll be anyone frivolous enough to help a chick grind levels... But alright then, let's head to the adventurer's guild.

Adventurers: Giant Frog subjugation quest here ! We still need a mage ! We still need two frontliners too ! Ones clad in metal armor ! Is anyone available ?!

Adventurers: Seems like several goblins have been spotted in the forest ! That's goblins ! The beloved goblins that are worth a lot of money ! In order to make sure the newbies aren't going to get wiped, we're going with a larger than normal party ! Anyone who needs money, feel free to join up !

Adventurers: Anyone who can't deal with the frogs, want to try dungeon delving with us ? We have a policy of avoiding combat and only searching for treasure ! People with the thief class are welcome, you'll be handsomely rewarded !

Kazuma: Hey, what's going on ? Why's everyone so hard-working ? This isn't like you guys.

Adventurer: Oh, it's Kazuma. Well, what else could it be ? It's the taxes, yesterday. The taxes. Everyone here was caught by the tax collectors and lost half of their hard-earned money. We're just feeling the pinch from our wallets being suddenly lightened like that.

"Hm. Well, at the very least, I see things are proceeding smoothly, aren't they ?"

Luna: pretty much, Y/n sir. we're very grateful for yur cooperation on that matter.

Kazuma: ... What did you do this time ?

"Look at the rewards for the basic quests."

Kazuma: Huh... H- hey, what's the meaning of this ?! This is ludicrously high !

"Welcome to the Adventurer guild of Axel... Sponsored by the Windings Corporation."

Kazuma: ... What ?

"You heard me. Sponsored."
Luna: The Windings corporation offers their services of transport and delivery for free to the Adventurer guild, allowing for much higher rewards for quests.

"It's a win for everyone. The adventurers get to earn more, the paperwork gets easier for the guild, the state gets to have more regular taxes, and the Windings Corporation gets lowered taxes thanks to that."

Kazuma: ... He's getting closer and closer to buy out the country each passing day...

Aqua: Kazuma Kazuma, do you think there'd be anyone who'd free to help Emperor Zell gain some levels ? Everyone here seems so busy...

Kazuma: That'll depend on how much you are offering as a reward. Speaking of, do you have a reward prepared ?

Aqua: ... Well, I have some coupons that can be redeemed at the Axis Church for a free confession from me. Do you think that'll be enough ?

Kazuma: They'll probably just rip it up on the spot, so don't even try. Everyone's panicking over not having any money, after all.

Adventurer: hey, isn't that Kazuma ?! I've heard from the tax collectors ! Lalatina is the mastermind behind this sudden tax collection, right ?!

Kazuma: hey, we were chased around by Darkness too, you know ? You're complaining to the wrong person. Complain to the one who chased you down instead.

"... ... ... Why's everyone looking at me with foam at the mouth all of a sudden... ?"