" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Kazuma: Oh.. I remember now... I was killed by the Winter Shogun, wasn't I ?

Eris: Um... Have you calmed down ?

Kazuma: Ah, sorry. I lost my composure. That was embarrassing of me.

Eris: This is nothing to be ashamed about. You lost your precious life after all.

Kazuma: Um, may I ask... ? Do you know what happened to the monster that killed me ?

Eris: Do not worry, the Winter Shogun disappeared after cutting you down.

Kazuma: Phew. That's a relief... So the rest of them are okay...

Eris: Satou Kazuma. You came from peaceful Japan and encountered something like this... Brave soul who came from another world, I will use my power to let you reincarnate in peaceful Japan to a wealthy family and live a free life.

Kazuma: 'Oh, that's right... You can either go to heaven or get reincarnated as a baby... Going here was an abnormality... It was a short time, but a happy one... Not seeing these troublesome guys anymore...'

Kazuma: Wait, if I get reincarnated as a baby... Does that mean I can get a wealthy and peaceful life, a childhood girlfriend, and all that goes with it ?!

Eris: Uhh... This is within possibilities, yes...

Kazuma: Awesome ! Y/n can take it from now on, I won't regret this, that's for sure ! ... yeah... I'll never regret it... *Sob*

Kazuma: Uh... Tears... ?

???: Hurry and come back, Kazuma !! How can you be killed off so easily in such a place ?! It's too early for you to die !

Kazuma: Ah ?! Wait, what's happening ?!

Eris: Th- This voice... Aqua-senpai ?! I was thinking that Archpriest looked just like senpai, could it really be her ?!

Aqua: Kazuma, can you hear me ? I have cast resurrection on your body, you can come back now ! there's a goddess before you, right ? Ask that girl to open the gate back here.

Kazuma: ... So you finally did something as a goddess... Okay, wait for me, Aqua ! I'll be right there !! 'Wait, can she even hear me ?'

Eris: Hold on, wait a minute ! No, no, I'm sorry, you've already been revived once. By the laws of the heavens, you can't be resurrected again ! The other side can't hear us, unless Aqua-senpai is connected to your voice ! Could you help me pass along the message ?

Kazuma: Uhh... Okay... Hey Aqua, can you hear me ?! She said that I've already been revived once, so I can't be revived again because of some rules in heaven or something !

Aqua: Ah ?! Which goddess said such foolish things ! Tell me your name ! A goddess watching over such a far-off place should respect an elite like me who oversees Japan !

Kazuma: Uhhh... It's a goddess by the name of Eris...

Aqua: ERIS ?! That flat-chested Eris that audaciously used her name as the currency, just because she is worshiped as the national religion of this world ?!

"What in the name of all is happening on that side, aqua ? Mind elaborate a bit ?"

Aqua: Kazuma is stuck until Eris decided to open the gate.

"Eris ? Wait, the Eris ? Okay, Kazuma ! Stay right where you are for a sec ! I'm coming !"

Kazuma: ... What does he mean "He's coming"... ?

Aqua: H- Hey, what are you... Wait ! Stop tha- !!

*F-TWOOOOOOOOOOOM*

*Pop*

"Yo, Kazuma."

Kazuma: ... What the hell did you just do ?!

"I call that 'The Headshot', quick and painless. I just needed a few words with Eris real quick."

Eris: Y... You... Just...

Aqua: You all are stupid ! The three of you ! But listen, if Eris really refuse to let you leave, you can just go and rip out her pads and-

Eris: I get it ! I get it ! I'll make an exception this time ! I'll open the gate !

Kazuma: Pads ?! They're pads ?! They're really pads ?! ... I don't mind if they're pads.

"... You go ahead and leave, I still need a word with her."

Kazuma: Got that. Don't take too long though.

*VIOMP*

Eris: Really, Aqua-senpai is still as unreasonable as ever.

"You don't say. But besides that, there's one thing I needed to ask. 'What the hell ?'."

Eris: Huh ?

"You remember how I took a character's abilities from a videogame, right ? So could you explain me how the hell are there character from said game just going around in this world ?"

Eris: Y- Yes... I should have told you... But some of the gods may have taken a keen interest in some of Earth's entertainment... And one in particular decided to... "Include"... What did he call it again... "Easter Eggs" I think ?

"... Wow... There's a weeb god out there. Well, if you see the guy, give him my regards."

Eris: I will, even if I haven't seen him in ages... Is he still hanging with Ristarte and her hero...

"Hm ? Well, sorry for the mess, but I really wanted to get this answered ! Uh... I'd say 'Until next time' but I honestly hope this is the last time we see each other. Bye !"

*VIOMP*

Eris: ... Thinking again, maybe I should've told him about these two...

'... Funny... Everything is cold, but my head feels warm...'

Darkness: A- Ah ! You're awake ! What has gotten into you ?!

"Uh... Oh, right, I'm back. My neck's sore..."

Aqua: How is that a surprise ? You burned off your own head with that beam. How did you take so long to get back ?!

"Ah, that... I'm really sorry if I made you worry, but I needed a bit of... Divine conversation, if you may..."

Kazuma: Please don't do that again... Next time you want to ask something, just go through me...

"Alright. Honestly, as much as I complain about it... I don't think I'd trade this life for the one I had before."

Kazuma: ... I would. I want a trade.

Aqua: How dare you, you hikiNEET ! If you want to see that child so much, I'll send you there right now !

Kazuma: Stop, stop ! Don't rough up someone who was just revived, you violent goddess !

"... These two are as energetic as ever, that's a good thing."

Darkness: Is your body okay ? Does it feel weird anywhere ?

"Mmh... Neck sore. Nothing some stretching can't solve. Kazuma ?"

Kazuma: I seem fine. By the way, how was I killed ?

Aqua: You were beheaded by the Winter Shogun, a clean cut. Thanks to that, it easily reconnected and healed. I also restored a bit of your blood, but not all of it, so you'll probably feel weak if you do anything strenuous, so no vanguard duties. It'll be over if you get hurt and bleed again, understand ?

Kazuma: Be- Beheaded... ?

"See that pool of blood over there ? You head rolled until it hit that tree."

Kazuma: Gh... You know what... Let's just call it a day and head back to town.

"Agreed."

"It took us about one hour... And we made about 1,600,000 Eris... The result's not bad, but maybe not worth dying for..."

Kazuma: That winter Shogun is said to be a special monster, how high is his bounty ? To break Darkness's sword in one blow, he seemed stronger than Beldia and his 300 millions.

Megumin: The winter shogun doesn't do anything as long as you leave the snow sprites alone. Even so, the bounty should be about 200 million, at least.

"It's less, but... Beldia was a demon general, and actively attacked people... For a passive monster to have a bounty of 200 millions... Glups."

Kazuma: 200... With that much money, I could clear Aqua's debts, buy a house and live leisurely for quite a while... Megumin, couldn't you use Explosion on it ?

Megumin: The Winter Shogun can't be defeated by the Explosion. Although it had a shape of a human, it is still a fairy. Fairies are immaterial, an existence just like mana. If It was an existence like the Fairy king, its magical defense would be rather high, so although Explosion could deal some damage to it, it would still be hard to settle it in one blow... Also, I don't want to cast something on such a scary opponent.

"No way in hell here either. I don't wanna try to chip damage it for days, I'd fall waaaaaay before it does."

Kazuma: Hmmmm...

Aqua: Hmph, Kazuma, you look rather down. But I wasn't just thinking about prostrating. Here, look !

"You... You kept one of these sprites ? Did you hide that one from the Shogun all along ?"

Kazuma: Oh, that's smart of you, Aqua ! Okay, hand it over, I'll crush it right now.

Aqua: Wha- ! No ! This child is for my fridge ! To drink ice-cold neroid in summer... No, don't kill this child ! I even gave it a name, so you can't kill it ! No, no !!

"Don't push yourself. Even lessened by a certain someone's debts, we made quite the killing today. Let's just rent a room and call it a day."

Aqua: Hehe, I have to take good care of this child and make lots of ice in the summer. And I'll sell shaved ice with this child on the roadside ! I'll sleep with it in the hot summer night... ! Hey, do you guys know what it eats ?

"Do sprites even eat ? Don't they just feed on mana or something like that ?"

Megumin: It looks light and fluffy, probably tastes good if you dip it in sugar and put it in your mouth...

Kazuma: ... There was Eris... And then these guys... *Sigh*. I want a trade...

"Laws of jinxing, Kazuma..."