" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Eris: That world is currently facing a crisis ! At this rate, it's highly possible that the Demon King really will end up wiping out humanity ! Please listen to me !

"... That might end up being a bit of an issue..."

*Cockadodledooo !!*

"... And on the other hand, there's that issue too."

*Cocka ! Cockadodledooo !*

Aqua: No, Emperor Zell! You shouldn't make noise right now! That man has been saying a lot of stuff about turning you into dinner as of late! He'll do it! A man as brutish as Kazuma-san will really do it! So please go back to your quiet and gentle self! Seeing your unruly side is quite beautiful too, but you can't make such a fuss this early in the morning. We need your power as a dragon to take down the Demon King, so before you grow big enough to fly us all the way to the Demon King's castle, you need to quietly build up your power.

Zell: Cockadodledooo !

Aqua: No, Emperor Zell, please be quiet !

Kazuma: Oh shut up ! What are you doing so early on the morning ?! Keep it down already ! Wasn't he supposed to take a long time to grow up because of his high mana ?! When did he suddenly become a rooster ?!

Aqua: Emperor Zell is a life-form steeped in mystery ! He's a dragon, after all. He must have gotten fired up over fighting the Demon King and awakened to some kind of mysterious power !

"What kind of nonsense are you saying now ? Make that chicken shut up, or he'll be nuggets within a week."

Aqua: Emperor, I'll stop these fiends, so hurry up and run ! Don't worry about me, just run ! Live free and grow strong ! Once you're fully grown, we'll go fight the demon king together ! Be careful of the butcher on the third street !

Zell: Cocka cock... !

Aqua: Aah, Emperor Zell ! Are you saying you won't leave me alone ? Very well, let's face down that fiend together ! As your mother, i'll definitely protect you !

"While I have no problem with you raising a chicken or being delusional enough to think he's a dragon, the least you could do is not put his coop right under the bedrooms ! Move it away !"

Aqua: Then, will you promise not to say stuff like turning him into dinner and such ?

"Only French can willingly eat rooster, it's way more tough than regular chicken..."

Kazuma: ... Still, are you still going on about the Demon King ? Just give up on him already. The last General, the Demon King's daughter, is still hanging around his castle, and so are a whole bunch of elite monsters. Just leave that kind of dangerous stuff to the actually strong people and enjoy our lives here. Don't worry, someone will definitely take care of it. We should be enjoying our lives now that we have fame and fortune.

Aqua: This is why Japanese that are used to peace are... Why do you always think of this as someone else's problem ? It's because of your naive way of thinking that you end up dying more often than a guy playing spelunker. Leave such thoughts back on Earth. Right now, this world is at war. The Demon King's daughter is about to lead a large army against the capital, right ? And there's still a chance that they will attack this town...

Aqua: ... ... ...

"What's with you now ? You're just opening and closing your mouth now, are you imitating a fish or something ? Just how many points did you put into that party trick ?"

Aqua: That's not it ! Right, the Demon King ! Now's the perfect time to take down the Demon King !

Kazuma: ... ... ...

Aqua: Ah, ah, wait ! Don't go back to sleep, Kazuma-san, please hear me out ! If the Demon King's daughter is leading a large force to attack the capital, that means that the castle is empty ! And if they attack this town on top of that... ! They have the barrier, so they feel safe sending such a large force out ! If we attack them while their armies are out, if we are lucky, there might only be the Demon King in the castle ! After all, there's no need to keep a powerful force in reserve when they have that barrier of theirs, right !? This might be the perfect chance to launch a raid on his castle !

"Okay... That's actually a well-thought idea for a change..."

Kazuma: Even if you say that... Ah, I've been meaning to ask, but can healing magic cure baldness ?

Aqua: Leaving aside cases where the hair has been burnt off, that normally wouldn't work... I'm sorry I can't help you, Kazuma.

Kazuma: I'm not going bald yet ! There's a potion in that forbidden set that increases your magic in exchange for turning you bald, right !? I was just thinking of drinking that along with the potion that increases your levels in exchange for your magic, that's all !

"... That could work, but I wouldn't recommend. Even you get quite a bit of your power via your basic spells, after all."

Aqua: There isn't one.

"... Excuse me ?"

Aqua: I gave the potion that increases your levels in exchange for your magic to Emperor Zell. Look at his beautiful body. At this rate, it seems like he will be able to eat the Demon King in a single glup in about ten years, don't you think ?

"... You used the potion that reduces your magic to 0... To that chicken who's only distinct trait was its very high magic. Congratulations, you turned him from a somewhat special chick to an absolutely regular one with no redeeming qualities whatsoever."

kazuma: You used that potion that could've been a trump card to him ?! Why ?! Why are you so stupid ?! Why do you always ruin my plans ?!

Aqua: W- What, you don't have to get that angry ! I just thought that if Emperor Zell gained a few levels and grew larger, he'd be able to do something against the Demon King ! Come on, look ! Don't you think he looks a lot stronger now ?

"... ... ... I can't tell which of the two is the stupidest one, and that's honestly very concerning."

Kazuma: Pfft.

Darkness: What are you guys raising such a fuss about so early in the morning ? Breakfast is ready, so... y- You look like you're having fun...

"Me, yes. These two, not so sure."

Kazuma: Cut it out ! You'll let mosquitoes in if you break a hole in the window ! If you break it, i'll use your room until the window is fixed ! Wind Breath !

Aqua: using magic is cheating ! If you don't want your window broken, then help me out with taking out the Demon king !!

Kazuma: Create Water !

Aqua: So you're giving the goddess of water a refreshing shower now ? Did you forget ? I can be completely submerged in water and it wouldn't do a thing to me. Even if it's getting cold out, this is but a reward to me-

Kazuma: Create Earth !

Aqua: Wait, no, stop- !!

"... i'll have breakfast now. They should stop doing these soon enough."

Kazuma: Zzzzz...

???: Nii-chan... Wake... Onii-chan, wake up ! You'll be late ! Come on, wake up !

Kazuma: ... Zzz... ?

Aqua: Good morning, Onii-chan ! Now, let's go take down that Demon King like we always do !

Kazuma: Get off !!

Aqua: Oniii-chan !!

Kazuma: ... Today's awakening was kinda nice.

Aqua: I knew it. Using "Onii-chan" on the lolicon Kazuma really does work best. Hey, Kazuma, isn't it about time you give in already ? You might whine and grumble, but you're the kind of person who always pulls through in the end whenever one of us is in trouble, right ?

Kazuma: Do you think I'm some kind of blue cat robot who can do anything ? In the first place, you are the actual goddess here, so shouldn't you be the one to resolve such issues ?

Aqua: The only things I can do are purifying water, dealing with undead and devils, and resurrecting people. Goddesses aren't exactly that great of an existence, you know ?

"So you finally admit it, don't you ? And I assume you can't seal the Demon King or something, can you ? Sealing evil existences is kinda what Goddesses do, but a phony like you..."

Aqua: The only sort of evil I can seal away right now are the kind coming from Kazuma's pants...

Kazuma: D- Don't stare at it... I can't help it, it's morning ! Anyway, nevermind that. Right now, it isn't a guarantee that you would be able to bring down the barrier, right ? But if another General would be taken out, you'd definitely be able to bring it down, so let's wait until then, alright ?

"The last General is the Demon King's daughter, isn't she ? However strong she may be, I can't see her coming out unscathed after a direct clashing against the Capital's forces, with all these cheat holders, elite knights, and the royal family on top of it. If anything, I'd say taking advantage of the ongoing attack to take them from behind, quite literally cornering them between a hammer and a hard place."

Aqua: general... if there's only one general left... Yeah, if there's only one general left, I'll definitely be able to take down the barrier ! Once the barrier is down, someone will eventually take the Demon King out ! Yeah, definitely ! I'm heading out just for a bit !

Kazuma: ... She's not thinking about...

"Well, there are only two generals left... the Demon King's daughter, and..."

"So, that's why she's in timeout baby jail right now, sorry for the inconvenience."

Aqua: Wiz ! Where are you ?! Stop hiding and come out already !

Vanir: Are you deaf ? Moi has already told us that the slacking shopkeeper isn't here ! That shopkeeper orders a bunch of useless stuff the moment you take your eyes off her, so Moi is also... Hey ! Remove your hands from my mask ! Dear associate, handler, do reign in your rabid hound of a Goddess !

Aqua: Hey, strange devil, if those powers of yours aren't a scam, hurry up and use them to determine Wiz's current location.

Vanir: Hmph. Don't lump my powers together with that of the goddesses who claim omnipotence but are in fact unable to accomplish anything at all. Besides, Moi has already told you, the more power a person has, the harder it is for me to see through them. That defective shopkeeper has no talent for business, but the one thing she does have is power.

Aqua: You talk a big game, but at the end of the day, you just don't know, do you ? You really are completely useless whenever it's important. This is a little weird coming from me, but doesn't that make you even worse than me ?

Vanir: ... Very well, it has been some time, but perhaps it's time for me to get serious. It's best that you leave the store. Moi shall settle the score with those irritating gods today.

"These two really don't get along..."