Illicit

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He was sleeping calmly when some sound fell on his eardrums and he opened his eyes slightly.

A fragile feminine figure appeared in front of his eyes in the dark of the room. He smiled to himself. Memories from last few months to earlier this night flashed in his mind.

How he met her after so many years. How much her smile had changed in all these years.
How much she finally accepted that She missed him.
How She admitted of still Loving of him.

His eyes fell on the table clock at the side table to the bed. It was about to strike 2.40 a.m. . He took a deep sigh of relief to realize. How much She needed him, almost the same He carved for her all these years.

It took him a little time to accept that She was the one after their break up at college. But when He felt it, She was gone by then. Her best friend informed him that She got married to an affluent businessman, just after a few months of their result.

He closed his eyes and sat back as the hurt was coming back. He felt the need to hold her again to make sure, she's real not a dream.

He got up and went to hold her from back. His hand slide around her waist and grabbed her against his strong bare chest, taking in a firm back hug.

"Oh, how much I missed this." He said with closed eyes, nuzzling up at her neck to back of ear and implanted a warm kiss at her temple.

She stood still for a moment like a mannequin, then started to arrange plates of her saree which She was just dragging when he came from behind.

"I may sound orthodox but I have to admit, this saree makes you more beautiful, more elegant and on top of all, most irresistible." He chuckled against the bare skin of her shoulder, nuzzling away the Fringe of her blouse a bit.

"I need to go." She exhaled controlling herself against the impact of his touch.

"Go? You mean right now? But where?" He withdrew his head a bit back and made her turn toward himself to face him.

As She turned to face him, he noticed her dark eyes filled with tears, face had lost all shades of pink he had witnessed just a few hours back. As if something had stung her.

"What happened? Why are you crying?" He inquired, taking her face in his palm with concern.

"Don't you know? What just happened between us?" Her eyes started to turn fierce just like her tone.

"What?" He raised eyebrows in surprise.

"Don't act like nothing has happened." She shook off his arms and stepped backwards.

"What? Why you behaving like this? How can You think that I can forget this night." He quickly took steps and covered the distance between them, trying to smile a bit.

"Look at me, I love you and your feelings are not differ to mine. We just lived our love. And there is nothing wrong in living your emotions." He held her shoulders and made her sit on the bed.

"This is wrong. I should have controlled my emotions." She could hardly form the sentence before breaking into sobs and hid her face behind her palms.

He couldn't help but felt a strong pang somewhere near his heart. He wanted to hug her and say anything that can offer her comfort. But her words, her repentance over their lovemaking had started to make him feel guilty, as if he had taken advantage of her.

Silently, he withdrew his hand which he raised in futile attempt to reach her shoulder. He raised from his knees as he had been kneeling in front of her only, grabbed his shirt, lying somewhere on the side table only.

As he pulled the shirt, few books from the table fell on floor. The thud made by them made her realize the Swift movement of his.

She wiped her tears and looked in front of herself in hope to find him, but he had walked a few steps away from her. She got up and followed his steps to hold his hand from behind, "Where are You going?"

"I... I can't bear it anymore." He said trying to hold himself back.

"You can't bear it? And what about me?" She left his hand and stood lifeless in front of him, with tears rolling down on her cheeks.

"What You want Arya? You want to go away from me. So I have to leave. It's not right time for a woman to roam out there with a young baby girl. I can't let you go out." He growled this time at her with frustration.

She just kept gazing at his face. It made him more frustrated. But he heaved helplessly and added, "You stay, I'm leaving." He turned away to walk out of the room, buttoning his shirt upwards.

He had taken only two steps when her arms encircled around his chest from back and stopped his moving feet.

"Please forgive me Akhil but I ... I should not be doing this. With You with my daughter, with my... Husband." She took a pause before adding up the last word and started to cry worse, digging her head in his back.

"Husband?" He freaked at once at the mention of the word and turned to face her, removing her arms from his sides, "You even know what that word stands for? That man never deserved to be called 'A Husband'. He left you two years ago with a two years baby?" He held her closer by arm, pulling to look straight into his eyes, " You still count him as your husband?"

There was something in his eyes, a kind of mixture of shock, disbelief, anger and disgust which scared her.

Yet she dared to speak up, " I can't change the fact Akhil, He is father of my girl and I'm still his wife."

"That man had abandoned You when You were carrying his child in your arms! And he is your husband!

That man didn't even care to come back for his own child when even his parents informed him about her illness. And Still he is father of Your child?"

His eyes started to bleed with tears of anger at the mention of her past sufferings caused by her husband. He almost pulled her up closer to his face. So close that she could feel his fuming breaths on her face.

"Akhil, You are hurting me." She whispered looking into his teary eyes.

"You are doing the same. Trust me, worse than ever. You looking at our love as a sin because of that man who ditched you years back." He exhaled putting her down on her feet.

She felt as if thousands of needles piercing into her whole existence. Unable to stand on her own, She fell on her knees like a shattered glass painting, and started to cry worse.

He took few steps away from her in attempt to leave the room. Opened the door and took a step ahead when her murmuring words fell on his ear as if she was talking to herself, "I'm sorry Akhil, I'm sorry. Don't... Please don't leave me. I'm tired, please don't go. He left me good for nothing. I know I don't deserve you but please forgive me."

He tried his best to step ahead and shut the door behind but he could not. His fist hit hard on the wall to give him some release from the stress loading up in his mind. After a few deep breaths he turned back in the room.

The scenario in front of his eyes was enough to shock him. She was lying prone on the floor, still sobbing hysterically. He quickly reached to her and took her in his arms to lift and place her on bed.

"Please, please don't go." She begged to him between sobs, holding his shirt in firm grip, looking at his face.

He placed her at bed and turned to get some water for her from the table across the room but her grip at his shirt turned more firm, "please don't go. I'm sorry Akhil." She curled herself closer to him.

"Calm down Arya, I'll get some water for you. I'm not going." He tried to pecify her by pampering her head.

"No, You will leave me. As I have hurted You. I know, It's not right to compare You with him but He left me like that only. He went for a business trip and never came back. Just a call to let me know that I was not good enough to match his personality. I was not good enough for being His wife. I was nothing but a mistake which he don't want to see ever in life again." She broke into his lap, hugging around his waist.

He got tears once again to realize may be this was the reason Arya denied to meet him earlier, that man had made her belief that it was her fault,in their unsuccessful marriage. He started to rub her back gently.

"Maa said, He will be back in sometime but he didn't. My daughter asks about her daddy. What should I tell her? That her mother failed as a wife that's why She lost her father! She is going to hate me Akhil when She will get to know it." She dug her face in his lap and cried bitterly.

"Stop it and look at me." He said with affection to calm her.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm crying for my failures while I have failed You do many times, as a beloved, as a friend and now, even as an one night stand, I'm failing You. I'm sorry but I'm a mother Akhil. I have responsibility of my daughter too." She said and sat back facing away from him.

He got shock to hear her words. For few seconds he sat still 'One Night Stand' is this what she thought of him, of his love?

"What You just said? " He held her face in his palms sitting in front of her.

"One Night Stand' is this what these 5 years of our separation taught You?" He inquired looking straight into his eyes but in response to his question her eyes stray away, trying to hid the pain.

"If You didn't get what I have told you earlier this night, I Love You Arya Rai." And he placed a soft kiss on her lips.

She accepted his love without any resistance. He just stayed closer to her face as if tracing her face with his eyes only while his hand moved swiftly and pulled up the corner of her saree and place it over her right shoulder to cover her bare part of body.

"And let me remind you one thing. I invited you to this house warming party with Your daughter. Whom I want to call my daughter too if you have no problem in it." He said smiling a bit, caressing the back of her neck.

She closed her eyes resting her forehead against his. A silent drop of tear rolled down at her cheek, "Are You sure? It's not going to be easy, to tell your family, to accept someone else daughter as yours." She said in a terrified manner as if he would back out any moment.

"No, it's not that tough as I made Our daughter sleep tonight in her new room which is just next to ours. If you have forgot. But the toughest part is going to be, to make you trust that I'm here to stay. This is our love, our family, nothing illicit." He assured her taking her head on his chest to make her sleep.

"What if He comes back?" She said abruptly, hugging his chest.

"Ahm, his father told me, He had sent the divorce papers last year but they hide it as you were not mentally strong enough for the shock." He admitted the secret. But there was no response from her side.

"Arya?" He inquired and looked down to find her asleep hugging him tight.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zucJcJ6UJ84

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