It was a bright Saturday. The sun shone down brightly, the air smelled vaguely of flowers. All the clocks seemed to be ticking by faster than normal, but somehow, as I stood in the near vacancy of the corner of Orchard Street and Ross Avenue, it felt like before. It felt like I was actually okay again.

The light changed to the little icon of the yellow man that showed when it was safe to cross. I crossed the street, grabbing Theo's hand and pulling it along with mine.

He'd called in sick to McDonald's... and I... I'd put off plans of theft for the time being.

The smell of coffee wafted out over the entire intersection. Bells tinkled as I pushed open the door, the rustic lighting showing Theo's face, still quiet and paler than I thought it should've been.

I looked away, memories of what he'd said that morning threatening to make me drop his hand, but instead, I pulled him forwards.

I walked past the sign reading "We have a no cash policy. Credit and debit cards only." Tables filled the whole shop, and it wasn't long before a chair was under me and Theo was across from me.

Surprisingly few people were in the shop for a weekend, but that was good. Lucy, the same girl that'd served me and Daisy, made her way leisurely towards me and Theo.

"Welcome to Cindy's Coffee Shop. What can I get you today?" she said in a bored tone. Her eyes flicked over to the counter with an extensive display of pastries. The effect was ruined by a big man leering over them, a badge reading 'manager' stuck on it.

I looked over to Theo, asking with my eyes how much we could actually afford. He just nodded subtly.

"Can I have," I stared at the case, "a chocolate brownie, please?"

"And you?" she muttered to Theo.

"Nothing, thanks," he said, his voice sounding tight, not that Lucy noticed or commented on it. She just walked away.

"I like this place. It's cute. Quaint."

He looked down at his hands. "Are those the only reasons you like it?" His eyes flicked towards the sign.

"No. They're not."

He nodded, his face grim. Lucy didn't break our silence, but she did bring a brownie for me to stuff in my face.

She walked away, and both me and Theo didn't say anything more.

He had a haunted look in his eyes. I wondered... did he look like that before he...

It didn't matter, did it? His justifications didn't make me feel better. His apologies made me feel worse for still letting it bother me, but it was all so horrible.

But then, I was hardly one to judge.

They wouldn't look at me. I had devoured the chocolate goodness in a matter of seconds, so all I was left to do was stare down at my chocolate covered hands. I reached for a napkin, wiping the brown smudges off, looking up to see Theo looking at me.

I really didn't like the way he was looking at me. I'd probably looked at him the same way all the past months, but that didn't make it any easier to maintain eye contact.

"Rose, did Daisy say anything about a cure for you?"

"No," I said, looking down at the table.

He nodded.

"Are you going out again tonight?"

"I don't know." He groaned, still looking as bad as ever.

I smiled, probably looking like a scheming weasel looking for its monicle, "How about you go, and take me with you?"

"What?"

"You heard me."

"It's not safe."

"That never stopped you," my smile dropped so my face was like stone.

$$$

"Are you sure you want to come?" Theo asked, but we were already out of the apartment building. There wasn't much he could do to stop me.

"Yes. I already said that. Besides, this is going to be a challenge for me too." I patted my pocket, feeling the slender outline of crisp bills in it.

"And say you can't part with it? Are we just going to run out of the taxi?"

"Probably."

The yellow car was already driving towards us.

I got in the car with a defiant little smile towards Theo. He reluctantly got in after me.

"Where to?"

That was the cabbie, and I let Theo rattle off an address, but my head was already buzzing.

Should I have been getting ready to part with what felt like a huge part of myself, to give that up, or to run like Theo had said? Theo was definitely preparing to run. That act of faith was encouraging.

I leaned against the car, letting the steady nausea settle over me, bracing myself to let go. I just needed to let go.

The taxi came to a stop sooner than I hoped. He turned around. "$11, please."

I reached into my pocket. My hands clutched the money. When I looked down they were white and shaking. I counted out fourteen dollars, my hands trembling, my breath coming fast.

I closed my eyes, shoving some money back in my pocket. The cabbie gently pulled his fare out of my hand, and it was as though I couldn't move. My throat was tight, and my entire body was weighted to the seat. He'd taken it.

Theo was outside, opening the car door.

"Have a good evening," he was saying to that cabbie, the cabbie that'd taken my money without realizing how much personal growth that was. It was like it didn't matter. I started to move forward, he'd just put in the cupholder.

Theo pulled me roughly back, forcing me out of the car. I stumbled, and he caught me, even as the yellow car drove away to be lost on the streets with my money.

But it wasn't mine anymore.

I felt weak in the knees. Theo was entirely holding me up.

"Rose?"

I'd done it.

I smiled lightly.

I shifted my weight onto myself.

"I did it, Theo." Then I was shrieking, "I did it! I did it!"

"Yeah, Rose. You did it. How do you feel?"

I felt terrible, but that wasn't the point.

"I did it!"