4+comments/votes for the next chapter! Thank you to those who do comment and vote, it gives me motivation to write :) the gif above is Alec's eye roll mentioned towards the end of the chapter. Next chapter is when things should start to get interesting, so this chapter gives a bit of background on Izzy/Adelaide and Alec/Adelaide. 

'We all are stranger creatures than when we all started out as kids. Culture forbids, we have romantic fantasies about what dying truly is, fall off the grid.'
(Glowing Eyes, twenty øne piløts)

Adelaide flinched as the door slammed.

Magnus looked at the girl, her hair messy from her training and her cheeks red from her activities and her anger at Jace.

'How did he find you?' Magnus asked when it became clear she wasn't going to be the first to speak.

Adelaide's voice shook slightly when she answered. 'Clary didn't tell anyone where she was going, so he came looking for her and she didn't think to block her location either.'

'She's new at this Adelaide-'

'I'm not angry at her Magnus.' Adelaide said truthfully.

Magnus' eyebrows shot up in surprise. 'Well, then who are you angry at? Jace?'

Adelaide shook her head, turning to meet the warlock's confused expression. 'I'm not angry with Jace or Clary, I'm angry with myself. Jace has every right to hate me.'

'The things he said –'

'Were justified. I am not the same person they knew, Magnus.' Adelaide's tone made it clear the discussion was over.

'I'm going to have a shower.' Her voice softened as she left the room.

Magnus watched the shadowhunter leave. Adelaide may not have been angry at Jace, but Magnus was furious.

*****

Isabelle's words had unsettled Alec.

He hadn't realised how much Isabelle had watched him after Adelaide's disappearance, and it was true that he hadn't mentioned Adelaide to her or Jace after the memorial they held for her. The only time she had talked about her recently was when Clary interrogated him for answers. But that didn't mean he didn't think about her.

He thought about her all the time.

She knew parts of him that no one else did and she had never judged him for anything he shared with her. It was her who had noticed the way he withdrew into himself sometime around his sixteenth birthday, and it was her who pulled him out of it. Alec knew he wasn't a very open person, even now with Izzy his personal life was just that - personal. But Adelaide had a way of making him talk; making the truth find it's way out into the open.

'Alec? Can I come in?' Adelaide was standing outside Alec's bedroom door in the institute. She had snuck away from Isabelle and Jace who were discussing their training when she noticed Alec trying his hardest to go unnoticed as he left his friends in the training room.

'It's open.' Alec didn't feel like talking to anyone, but he knew Adelaide had only good intentions so he let her into his bedroom. He didn't have to tell her anything anyway, he could tell her he felt unwell, he supposed.

'Alec? What's wrong?' Adelaide sat beside him on the bed leaning her back against the wall just as he was doing. Alec refused to look at her expression.

'Nothing. I just don't feel well.' Alec shrugged.

Adelaide nodded as if she believed him. 'Okay, now tell me the truth.'

Alec made the mistake of looking down at her, her big eyes staring back up at him with nothing but concern in their depths.

'It'll change everything between us.' He warned.

Adelaide scoffed. 'I doubt that.' She watched as he sighed, his shoulders tense.

'I-I think something's wrong with me Adelaide. I think I'm...sick.' Alec spoke after a moment, anxiety clawing its way up his throat as he spoke.

'What? Alec...sick? What do you mean?' Adelaide gripped his arm tightly, worry for her oldest friend consuming her.

Alec tried to force the words out. 'I- I.' He sighed angrily. 'It doesn't even matter. Go back to Izzy and Jace. I'm fine.' He stood up and opened the door for her, waiting for her to leave.

Adelaide frowned and made her way to the door, promptly slamming it shut knowing no one was close enough to the rooms to hear the loud noise.

'Alec, talk to me please. You're scaring me.' By now the two were facing off in the middle of the bedroom. Alec's arms were crossed and Adelaide's confusion was growing.

'There's something wrong with me.' Alec repeated, his hands tensing into fists.

Adelaide waited.

'I like girls. A lot.' A strange tone entered Alec's voice. 'But- But I think I like boys just as much.' Alec refused to look at Adelaide, his defensive stance not relaxing.

Adelaide's eyebrows rose but before she could speak, Alec spoke again.

'Is there something wrong with me?'

Adelaide watched Alec, ignoring the defensive stance. Looking at him she could see the terror written plainly on his face at having his feelings out in the open. He was terrified there was something terribly wrong with him, that he was sick in some way. Adelaide felt cloaked in sorrow, wondering how long Alec had been worrying over this.

Adelaide stepped forward and pulled his arms away from his chest, holding his hands in her own. 'Alec, there's nothing wrong with you. You aren't sick.'

Alec scoffed, attempting to pull his hands out of hers but her grip was like steel. 'It's not normal.'

'Hey- Alec, Alec look at me.' Alec looked at her as her demanding tone hit her ears.

'Yes it is. It's completely normal and completely fine. There is nothing wrong with you. You like boys and girls, so what? That's nothing to be ashamed of Alec. You are you, you're still Alec. This doesn't change anything.' Adelaide tightened her grip on Alec's trembling hands.

'You're still the little asshole who helped Jace cut my hair when we were kids, you're the same Alec whose been there for me my entire life, through every hardship and tantrum I've ever thrown. You're my best friend, and I love you not matter who you choose to love. It doesn't matter if they're male, female, shadowhunter or downworlder. I don't care, I just want you to be happy.' 

Alec let out a shaky sigh, embracing the girl tightly. He could feel tears gather in his eyes and he blinked them away rapidly.

'You're my best friend, forever Alec. I love you.' Adelaide mumbled into his shirt.

'I love you too, Addy.' He whispered, feeling grateful to have her.

Adelaide pulled away from him slightly so she could see his face. 'Alec?'

'Yeah?'

'Does this mean I can buy you a stupid t-shirt that says 'freewheeling bisexual' across it?'

'No.' Alec glared at her, but as he looked at the grin on her face his lips twitched and soon the two were full on grinning at each other.

'I thought it was a great idea.' Adelaide pouted and then laughed.

'I'm not so sure the Clave would agree.' Alec sighed, his mood slipping, knowing how they would frown upon it.

Adelaide made a face. 'Fuck the clave.' She stated firmly.

Alec's eyes widened at her brazen words and Adelaide laughed, a mischievous look entering her eyes as she looped her arm through his. 'C'mon Alec, let's talk boys.'

Alec groaned as she dragged him out of the room, but his protests were half hearted. For the first time in a long time, he truly believed everything would be okay.

Alec smiled slightly at the memory. He didn't like to think about Adelaide too hard because his heart would hurt and he would find himself mourning her all over again. He would never understand what had made her leave the institute so late at night ending in her disappearance and eventually leading to her being declared legally dead. He would never get the chance to ask her. She was gone.

Alec let out a long sigh.

He'd told Izzy not to think about her and yet here he was, thinking about her every single day.

*****

Isabelle wished she could go back in time.

She wished she had paid more attention to Adelaide in the final moments she had seen her alive; maybe then she could have prevented her from roaming the streets the night she disappeared from their lives.

Adelaide was older than Izzy by only a year, and yet Adelaide had never once spoken down to her or treated her as inferior. Instead they had grown up as sisters and eventually become parabatai. Isabelle loved that she had a female friend who didn't drool over Alec and Jace. There had been other young shadowhunter girls who had come through the institute over the years who had befriended her in hopes of getting closer to Jace and Alec. After all, shadowhunters were known to make political alliances through marriages and snagging a Lightwood or the last living Wayland would do wonders for some lower ranked shadowhunter families.

Isabelle traced the parabatai rune on her skin gently. She would never dare tell her brothers, but there were times when she swore she could feel something on the other side of the fading rune, but of course that wasn't possible. Adelaide was dead. It was a known fact among the shadowhunter community that Adelaide Renhallow was dead and gone. It was just wishful thinking, she supposed.

But that didn't stop some small part of her hoping, praying, that Adelaide was out there somewhere, alive and breathing.

*****

Jace's head was spinning. She was alive.

Jace had refused to speak to Clary after they had left Magnus' and Clary had known not to push him. When they arrived at the institute he had instructed her to find Alec and get him or Izzy to train her again. Jace nodded at Izzy when they arrived ignoring her questions.

'Jace!' Isabelle yelled at him. 'What's gotten into you?'

Jace followed her eyes and saw the bag he had been punching had fallen off its hook with his last swing.

'Nothing.' He snapped picking the bag up and placing it back where it belonged.

'Do we have to do this now?' Alec complained as he stepped into the room with Clary following behind him.

'Yes. Either you or Isabelle are going to fight against Clary so I can see what we need to work on.'

Alec crossed his arms. 'Isabelle.'

Isabelle rolled her eyes and picked up two training staffs from their holders against the wall. Alec went and stood beside Jace.

'What's up with you?'

Jace refused to look at his parabatai, knowing how tempted he would be to tell Alec everything. Jace knew how much the truth would hurt him, so he just shook his head. 'Nothing.'

Alec rolled his eyes in annoyance at Jace's obvious lie.

'Ready?' Isabelle asked Clary from the training mat.

'Ready.' Clary confirmed, gripping the staff tightly.

Neither of the girls moved as they waited for the other to strike first.

'You're fairly small which makes it easier for you to dodge attacks, and if you can, strike your opponent in their weak spot first.'

Adelaide's earlier words drifted into the forefront of Clary's mind and before Isabelle could defend herself, Clary had moved forward and struck Isabelle in her ribs.

Alec's eyebrows rose in surprise as Isabelle jolted backwards, her face also contorting in surprise and pain. She hadn't anticipated Clary's move.

Isabelle hit back, knocking Clary in the side. Alec watched, expecting her to be thrown off balance enough for Izzy to get another hit in but to his shock she regained her balance immediately, swinging at Izzy who blocked the hit.

Jace watched the two girls carefully, noting where and how Clary struck at Isabelle and how familiar it seemed. His expression darkened considerably as he realised Clary was using Adelaide's own tactics to weaken Isabelle and lower her defence. Adelaide used to love striking him in the ribs routinely during their own fights knowing that with enough force behind her hit she could cause bursts of pain that lowered his defence even if just for a second, and usually a second was all it took for Adelaide to win.

Jace snuck at glance at his parabatai and noticed the frown on Alec's face as he watched Clary, and Jace hoped desperately that Alec wasn't drawing the same conclusion he had. If the truth came out, it wouldn't be good for any of them.