[ eun rae's point of view ]

"i-it was you?" he stuttered softly as his eyes penetrated into mine.

i didn't know why, but i ran out. i didn't know how to face him. i just wanted him to know that it was me but i was afraid to have a face to face conversation with him. why did i even take out my shades in the first place?

panting, i bent my knees as i tried to catch my breath. i had run quite far away from the fansign area. i realised that i had entered an alley.

all of a sudden, someone touched my shoulders and i jolted up. turning behind, i saw jung hoseok.

"why did you run away?" he questioned as his hands were resting on my shoulder. i slapped his hands off and attempted to run away but he grabbed my wrist gently enough to not hurt me and soon i was enveloped in a hug.

"i missed you, a lot," he confessed as his hands circled around my waist. my breath hitched by his action. we were way too close to each other.

"even though you were just a stranger to me that i met on snapchat, but we met in the pool once, i can't help but to fall for you, you know." he said as he pulled away from me, just a few inches near my face as his breath fanned my lips.

my lips sealed tight. i don't know what triggered me to do so, but i pushed him away harshly as i ran off again, leaving him there.

•••

"yo bitch." jackson cooed as he slapped my back. i did not respond to him, i was deep in my thoughts.

why was i such a coward just now? i showed my face to him, yet i ran. when he came to me, yet i ran again. all i do is running away from my problems every single time. why can't i just bring myself to apologize? why can't i answer to him?

"eun ra?" jackson's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. i nodded my head, motioning for him to continue his words.

"what's wrong?"

i bite my lips as i tried my best to not let tears fall.

"why am i such a coward?" i cried out in the end. jackson sat beside me and patted me on my back as i poured my heart out to him.

"well, do you like him?"

i don't know if i should like him. he's an idol and i'm just another normal fan, what chances are the possibility of us dating? the fans would come and haunt me if i was dating their oppa. i'm especially afraid of sasaeng fans.

"i shouldn't like him, i'm doing this for his own good. he told me he like me but i did not respond anything as my mind was blank at that moment. if i told him i like him and we are going to date each other, i'm scared the fans would hurt him,"

jackson sighed, before going to the kitchen to grab something i think. suddenly, my phone lit up and it was a notification.

'you received a snap from hobihorsehobi'

my eyes started to water again but i did not hesitate anymore seconds to open his snap.

'i'll wait for your answer. i'll wait.' was written as the caption while the snap was a picture of the pavement, with the black and white filter.

"you might as well drink some water," jackson came back and handed me a glass of water. i thanked him and gulped the water. i did not realise how dry my throat was until i needed to get another cup of water.

i stood up from the couch and went to the kitchen, and again, i received a snap from hoseok.

it was a picture of the road and with the caption, 'if you fall, i will catch you'.

i exited the app and switched off my phone. i absolutely did not know what to reply. let me just slowly think what i will reply.

after drinking my second glass of water, i went out of the kitchen to find jackson flipping through the channels of my television.

he decided to stop on the news channel and i yawned. "why news? it's boring."

the screen now shows a picture of a young man, lying on the middle of the road and a pool of blood surrounded him. his back was facing up. the driver who knocked him down had an panick expression.

as i took a closer look at the young man, i realised that he was dress in a white shirt with black jacket and jeans. wait, why does he seem so familiar?

"should i change the channel?" jackson asked, grabbing the remote control.

"wait!" i exclaimed.

a reporter started talking.

"a young man in his twenties was apparently knocked down by a car. the driver claimed that the young man was just crossing the road absentmindedly without looking out for cars."

"more shocking news was, the young man turned out to be an idol from a very famous k-pop group."

"it was jung hoseok, from bangtansonyeondan."

-

yay an update

i sURVIVED FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL HOORAY!

i got yes jams