Lord I have to much fun with these

—

Nico, sitting on Will's thighs after sparring: you're like a carpet

Will: what?

Nico: no, not like that.
Nico: wait. Yes. Yes like that

Will: WHAT

Nico: like one of those animal skins

Will: HUH???

Nico: like... a tiger that's been peeled? You know?

—

Percy: oh yeah I love school desks made of steel with a hundred million penises inside
Percy: Well, the desks weren't MADE with the penises, but it's an added bonus :)

—

Will teaching Nico recent history: Boutan is centred around happiness! And genocide... even happy people can commit genocide!

—

Nico: They're hugging and kissing and licking each other! My eyes are on fire!

Will watching the puppies: let them be, they're in love :(

—

Chiron: and of course you guys are getting ready for the greatest holiday of the year.... FLAG DAY!!! No, not Valentine's Day-

—

Will: What we need is more gay golfers, that's what we need

Nico: I say we get rid of all the golfers

—

Will: for the sake of debate, let's say Nico is a WAR CRIMINAL

Nico: what the fuck why me

—

Nico: hey Piper, how do you say "you idiot, there's a fish in ur library" in French

Piper: ... why?

Nico: why do you need to know

—

Will trying to explain Christianity: I was looking through the bible last night and I was like... where did they get this from? DONT. HAVE. SEX. ON. THE. ARC.

Nico: I thought we were learning about slavery in the 1700s-

Will: BUT HE DOESNT LISTEN! And hooks up with his wife! And god was furious!

—

Percy: Yeah they were hiding dead fish in people's wardrobes and stuff

Nico, taking the story:  AND THERE WAS GASOLINE EVERYWHERE AND THEN THE WHOLE CAR WENT UP IN FLAMES!!! KILLING THEIR FISH!!!!

—

Will: Nico, if you had to drop a bomb on a country where would you drop it

Nico, bluntly: Quebec

Will: That's not even a country

Nico: *shrugs*

—

Nico: The test didn't work

Will: That's the point

Nico: What

Will: You take a gay test and it doesn't work. The point is that you took the gay test

Nico, fuming: ... IT WAS A TRICK!!!

—

Percy: It's like not being able to touch a cute dog

Nico: did you just compare Will to a dog

Percy: NO NOT LIKE THAT- I MEAN YES?
Percy: SHUT UP I TOUCH MY FRIENDS ALL THE TIME

Will: Nico you can't even get mad last week you compared me to a tiger skin carpet. I think that's worse.

—

Will: Have you SEEN him in milf glasses???

—

Sonny: This is marraige counselling.
Sonny: Will, tell me what happened

Will: I am broken. Torn. Ripped to shreds.

Nico: I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING

Sonny: Nico. You don't have the talking stick.

Will, pretending to cry: He pushed me onto the dirty street and then everyone stepped on me and he didn't even offer a hand to help me up

Nico: I DIDN'T

Sonny: Wow Nico you're a horrible perosn, how do you feel about this? You have the stick

Nico: WILL IS A PUSSY

Will: you're so cruel... but that's expected from a liar and deceiver

Nico: WHAT??

—

Sonny: I'm sorry my temper got ahead of me

Nico: ...Sure

Sonny, joking: It's just the drugs

Nico, playing along: YOU'RE DOING COKE AGAIN??? YOU SAID YOU STOPPED

Will: I'm lost

—

Will: I only care about Cecil. Cecil is my soulmate. I'm marrying Cecil. I will have two cats with Cecil. I will live with Cecil.

Nico, Will's bf: Calm down Jesus

—

Nico: Am I in love or is this platonic?

Will: I mean I hope it's not platonic we've been dating for 9 months

—

Nico: I feel like Sonny DOESN'T actually... think.
Nico: No thoughts in his brain

Will: He isn't brain dead oh my god

—

Nico: What would you do if I died rn

Will, not paying attention, doing his math homework: Math
Will: WAIT I WASN'T LISTENING TO THE QUESTION

—

Sonny: your knees are weird

Nico: Yeah I was in a car crash when I was little

Will: yeah be nice to him he's insecure about it

Sonny: What-

Nico: It was really traumatic

Sonny: Wait really? Oh my god I'm so sorry-

Nico: Nah just kidding

Sonny, getting whiplash: WHAT

—

Nico: Man. Sometimes I'm just sitting here

Will: Yeah?

Nico: Wondering.

Will: ok buddy

—

A/n

Hehe funny stuff these ones are good

Thea