Fiza took a deep breath, her voice quivering slightly. "It's a long story," she began, rubbing her arms and wrapping her dupatta around them.

Alan noticed her shivering and asked, "Are you cold, Fiza?"

She nodded in response.

"I've booked a room here," she confessed, her words slow and hesitant.

Alan looked down, his teeth clenched, wrestling with his inner turmoil. He then gazed directly into Fiza's eyes, his desires conflicting with his fears-fear of getting hurt or hurting her, not physically, but emotionally. The prospect of both of them losing themselves in the moment only to regret it later worried him.

Fiza grasped the complexity of his emotions. "Just for some privacy, you can leave once we're done talking," she suggested, attempting to provide an escape.

"I don't know," Alan began uncertainly.

Fiza felt a pang of rejection. Was it just her feeling hopeful? Was he truly considering walking away after everything they'd been through?

"Fine, we'll talk here," Fiza interrupted, her resolve strengthening. She took a deep breath and started walking.

Fiza's voice trembled as she confided, "So, you know, Papa conducted my Nikah... my wedding... with Faisal. He told me the same thing as he told you. That he wouldn't pay for my tuition or my expenses unless I lived with Faisal and tried to make the marriage work. And Faisal warned me that he would make sure you went to jail and lost your medical license if you tried to get together with me."

"I hate Faisal! I wish I had never agreed to let him be my roommate!" Alan interjected, his words filled with frustration and regret.

Fiza looked at him, her eyes filled with emotion. "Faisal's a good guy, Alan," she said softly, her voice tinged with sadness and something more.

Alan stood in silence, his heart heavy with questions. Had she developed feelings for Faisal? He knew she had always had a soft spot for him. He waited, allowing her to speak her heart.

"Anyway, I moved in with Faisal. At first I called you several times a day, hoping that you would have unblocked me. Then, about three weeks in, my resolve began to waver. I found myself constantly fighting with Faisal, living under the same roof. I cut off from pappa and I barely spoke to mamma. And Farzana... Farzana might as well have been dead."

Fiza took another deep breath, tears streaming down her face as she gazed at her feet, unable to meet Alan's eyes.

"Faisal was kind. He told me every day that he loved me. He would kiss me, and I allowed it..."

Alan wondered why it hurt so much. He had expected a lot worse, hadn't he thought until today that she had been pregnant with Faisal's baby? Yet, hearing those words from her lips cut deeper than a thousand swords.

He snapped the rubber band against his wrist, as an emotional storm started brewing inside him.

Fiza noticed his action but she continued to speak, wanting him to understand everything.

"I didn't feel anything, I genuinely tried. I attempted to push you out of my thoughts and simply embrace him. But it was always you, Alan. If you weren't in my mind during the day, you appeared in my dreams at night. Everything reminded me of you. It felt as though I was betraying you, and I was betraying Faisal..."

Fiza's heart ached as she vividly remembered the pained expression that crossed Faisal's face every time he caught her in tears. She recalled how he would make efforts to engage her in conversation or bring her dinner, only to find her unable to eat in his presence. She had been helplessly aware of the hurt she was causing him.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she confessed, her voice trembling with emotion, "I realized I couldn't continue like this. Each day seemed to be worse than the last. I began applying for student loans, some way to cover that last tuition payment. But the banks rejected my applications, insisting on a parent's co-signature or a collateral. It was then that I submitted my resignation to the Pediatric HOD. I needed to break free from pappa's control and from Faisal. I couldn't keep hurting him."

Fiza's mind drifted back to that haunting day. It had been the first time Faisal's voice had thundered with anger at her, breaking through the fragile peace of her room, barging in without a knock.

"What the hell is this, Fiza?" Faisal shouted, thrusting a paper before her, a copy of her resignation letter.

As she looked at him in confusion, he explained, "Sundari mam sent it to me."

He sat down beside her on her bed, his hands resting on his thighs, head bowed in defeat. In a softer tone, he asked, "Is it so unbearable to be with me that you have to give up on your post-graduation?"

"I'm sorry," Fiza whispered, the words a fragile apology. "But I just can't..."

A fleeting, pained smile tugged at Faisal's lips. "I thought you were smarter than this. I believed you'd stay with me atleast until your fees were paid in full. I thought we had more time."

Fiza could see the anguish hiding behind his smile, and he shook his head in resignation.

"I know I'm not your first choice," he continued, his gaze finally meeting her tear-stained face. "But I hoped, with time, you might feel something for me."

He inched closer, his voice a gentle whisper, "I love you, Fiza. All I've ever wanted was to protect you."

"I'm sorry," Fiza repeated as Faisal leaned in and kissed her lips.

He had told her he loved her and had kissed a few times over the past three months, but she had never once kissed him back. To his credit, he had never tried to cross any other lines or force himself upon her.

He then walked out of the room to retrieve two envelopes.

"Here," Faisal said, gently handing her the first envelope. It contained the approved student loan she had applied for. "I signed as your collateral."

With trembling hands, he then gave her a second envelope.

Fiza opened it slowly, finding her marriage contract inside. It was signed by both Faisal and her father, the original document. She looked up at him, her heart heavy.

"You can tear it now, or you can give me permission to register our marriage," Faisal pleaded, his eyes filled with hope and desperation.

Fiza hesitated, torn by conflicting emotions. Faisal had never registered their Nikah. He loved her and was now letting her go.

"I'm going to tear it, Faisal," she whispered, her voice quivering.

"Just promise me this, Fiza," Faisal implored, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Promise me you won't go back to him unless you have a real reason to believe he won't hurt you again."

Fiza gazed at the man who had loved her unconditionally, despite knowing that her heart belonged to someone else. She looked at the man who had accepted her despite everything, who met every criterion on her list for an ideal husband. She remembered how he had been by her side during her miscarriage, how they had worked together tirelessly during the pandemic, and how he had sacrificed his ego and reputation to protect her by marrying her when he had thought she was in danger. But she felt nothing for him, nothing but pity and overwhelming guilt.

"I promise, Faisal," she said softly, her heart aching as she tore the marriage certificate.

Faisal finally broken down, and she held him close, whispering, "I'm sorry, I'm really sorry." Her mind, for the first time in months, felt at ease. Everything seemed lighter.

Fiza snapped back to the present, her voice quivering with emotion. Fiza couldn't understand why tears were streaming down her face as she thought of Faisal.

Alan gently rested his hand on her shoulder, an intuitive feeling that her tears weren't for him alone.

"Faisal, he co-signed my student loan, so I wouldn't have to rely on my father." When she looked up at him, her voice quivered as she finally confessed, "He also gave me the original marriage certificate and I destroyed it. He had never registered it. The ceremony itself had been illegal. So... technically, I was never married."

Tears cascaded down her cheeks. Alan pulled her close, his lips finding hers in a passionate kiss. Her words, "technically, I was never married," echoed in his heart, igniting a sense of freedom and longing that had been buried for far too long.

His lips hungrily explored hers, a sensual dance of desire as his hands glided down her face, tracing the delicate contours of her neck before settling on her waist.

She responded eagerly, kissing him with a fervor that left them both breathless, her tongue seeking entrance into his mouth.

His lips trailed a fiery path along her cheeks and then down to her jawline. "Fiza, you are mine. Just mine," he whispered seductively into her ear, his warm breath sending shivers down her spine as he tugged at her earlobe with his teeth.

Alan's heated breath caressed her face and neck as their kisses deepened, each touch an expression of their profound love. Finally, with a heavy heart, Alan pulled away, the realization of their surroundings intruding upon their passionate moment.

Fiza gently held his hand, guiding him through the lobby, up the elevator, and to her hotel room.

As they entered the room, Alan felt a sense of urgency. There were important matters they needed to discuss about their future; he didn't want to be swept away by the passion of the moment without addressing them.

"How long are you in Bangalore, Fiza?" Alan inquired, his eyes serious as he met hers. They needed to plan their future together, and he wanted to ensure they were on the same page.

Fiza's eyes sparkled with a warm smile as she replied, "I live in Bangalore now, Alan. I'm an assistant professor at our Medical college." The realization washed over him - they were finally in the same city. They may still need to commute in opposite directions, but they would finally be together.

"I love you, Fiza," Alan confessed, his voice filled with sincerity. "I can't love anyone else the way I love you. It's just you for me, Fiz."

"I know!" Fiza playfully winked at him, her eyes dancing with affection. "You told me this last year, just before you asked me to repeat after you that you were my husband and I was your wife."

Alan vividly remembered that conversation, and everything that had happened after. His smile widened. It seemed she had replayed it in her mind as many times as he had.

"Yeah?" Alan asked, a mischievous smile curving his lips. "And then what happened?"

Fiza met his gaze, her eyes filled with a daring challenge. "And then you pushed me against the wall," she replied, her voice tinged with anticipation.

He stepped closer, pinning her gently against the wall, their faces mere inches apart. "Like this?" he murmured, his breath brushing against her skin. "Mmm..." Fiza hummed in response.

"What happened after?" Alan whispered, his fingers tenderly tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear.

Fiza bit her lip, her voice soft and sultry. "Then you kissed me." Their lips met in a passionate embrace, igniting the intensity between them.

He pulled back slightly, his lips hovering over hers. "What else did I do?" he asked, his voice a sensuous murmur.

Fiza hesitated for a moment before confessing, her voice a whispered promise, "You opened my bra and... touched me."

Alan skillfully unhooked her bra and helped her out of her Kurti. She was out of breath. Yet, she held his gaze, refusing to look away. This was the strength of his Fiza, vulnerable yet powerful in her own right. She was everything to him.

He kissed her breasts, his mouth moving tenderly from one to the other, gently sucking while his fingers caressed the curves he adored and missed.

Breathless and consumed by longing for her love and affection, he finally asked in a hoarse whisper, "What happened next?"

Alan knew the answer all too well, as did Fiza, but she remained silent, her eyes closed, her body trembling with the intensity of their shared memories.

"Open your eyes, Fiza," Alan said softly, coaxing her to look at him.

For a fleeting moment, everything that had transpired in the past year now seemed to fade away. It was as if they were transported back to that construction site, the same raw attraction between them. His hand glided along the length of her thigh, lifting it and wrapping it around him. He pressed his pelvis against hers, igniting a familiar, fiery connection.

"Alan, wait," Fiza's voice brought him back to the present, and he gently released her leg, leaning against her trembling form. Their foreheads touched, their breaths mingling in the charged air.

"Let's take it slow, please?" she implored, her eyes conveying a complex mix of pain, hurt, and fear.

Alan nodded in understanding and captured her lips in another passionate kiss.

Fiza's world felt suspended in time. She was with Alan, her Alan, and in his arms, she found a sense of belonging that had eluded her for so long. Every touch from him set her ablaze, igniting a passion that coursed through her veins. She yearned for him, for the physical closeness that could bridge the chasm between them, but she also knew that they needed to talk. It had been a year, a year marked by pain, misunderstandings, and the slow process of healing. They needed to tread carefully.

Alan, sensing her internal struggle, asked softly, "Do you want me to leave?"

Fiza shook her head in response. "Unless you want to?"

This time, it was Alan who shook his head, a tender kiss on the tip of her nose eliciting a smile from her.

It was late, and Fiza had changed into her comfy pajamas while Alan stripped down to his boxers.

Fiza chuckled as the memory of the first time she had sen him in his boxers resurfaced. "Remember in Gokarna, when we were still just friends, you tried to sleep next to me in your boxers?"

Alan grinned at the recollection of their carefree past. "Oh, those were the days."

Fiza playfully warned, "Don't try anything tonight."

Alan feigned seriousness. "Oh, I won't... try," he replied with a wink.

"Idiot," she laughed as she climbed into bed. Fiza rested her head on Alan's bare chest, noticing how he seemed even more muscular than before. "Have you been working out more, or has it just been awhile since I've seen you?" she asked, tracing playful circles on his chest and abdominal muscles.

Alan's breath hitched at her touch for a moment, but he quickly recovered. "I've been hitting the gym quite a bit. Some of these orthopedic surgeries demand a lot of physical labor."

"You've also lost weight," Alan observed.

Fiza began, "You must be happy-"

Alan interrupted, frowning, "Oh, come on, Fiz, you know I love you no matter what. I was just trying to stay on top of your fitness just like I did on my own."

Fiza mumbled smilingly, "Yeah, yeah, that's what you say now..."

Alan climbed on top of her, and Fiza's eyes widened as a sense of familiarity mixed with anticipation washed over her. It was both comforting and exciting to have him close once more.

"Alan," she whispered softly, closing her eyes as he showered her with wet kisses over every inch of her face.

"Let's take it slow," she gently urged, and he complied, rolling back to her side and wrapping his arms around her.

Fiza closed her eyes, nestling against his chest, and Alan watched as she slowly drifted off to sleep, just as he had witnessed her do, so many times before.

As he kissed her forehead, he wondered if he would finally be able to sleep peacefully again.

**********************************************
Authors note

What are your thoughts on this chapter?
Anyone else feeling a little sorry for Faisal?

Let me know your thoughts. Don't forget to vote and comment!

💔Faiza