AFTER 3 YEARS

Again, the same memories, she woke up in the mid of the night with tears in her eyes, thinking about her life which was pure paradise, then. She can't complain about anything but looking at the night sky all she could do was blame herself for the mistake she did before three years when she didn't think about anything and decided to separate herself from the part of her soul. Her husband, her best friend, her whole life.

Oh my god, I can't deal with this anymore, please end this separation or end my life god. I know I have been a complete idiot and stupid. Please give me one chance, please.

She cried to the god just staring at the ceiling while feeling his presence all over her body again. Even though it has been three years, she could still feel it as they made love for the first time last night. His lips were on her neck when he demanded her words when he was inside her. Say, you love me.

"I love you. I am sorry." She cried to her mere imagination, but she couldn't do anything more than that. After whatever happened between them, he just disappeared also leaving her no trace to track him. No media could find him when he resigned from the post of CEO from Oberoi industries. All she could do was check his father's TEJ SINGH OBEROI tweet to follow up the news of his existence when every tweet regarding Oberoi industries has shivaay's existence message hidden.

Her life didn't change in a snap like before when she lost her parents in an accident, but she took every foolish decision on her own and separated herself from him. She had no idea when she took that decision, but there was a thought in the corner of her heart that he will come back to her, but that was what her egoist's heart told her over then.

"Do me a favor Anika, hereafter even you get a chance to bump into me by coincidence, please don't do that. Let it be our last time to see each other and hear each other."

That was the last words she heard when she took that decision, she felt her heart crack over then. But she ignored it. But he meant all those words. Her palm automatically came to her heart when she recalled those words from him. I want you, back. I need you back.

Without controlling her trembling heart once again, she picked up her phone lying next to her. Her hands shivered in longingness, she tried calling him again, it would be at least her zillionth time calling his number over this past three years. But there was the same message heard repeatedly.

"The number you have trying doesn't exist"

"Please, at least once, I am dying without you." She cried and lazily walked over the balcony and tried his phone number repeatedly. But the same message was heard repeatedly making her go weak on her knees. She dropped the phone from her hand when his image re-appeared in front of her eyes again. Her eyes went on her empty ring finger which had her both wedding ring and their promise ring. All she left with was the gift which he forgot to give it on her birthday due to the weather. The heart pendant, having their name attached beside, she felt it stringing her heart.

"ANIKA..." She heard her Aunt Catherine's voice when she immersed herself in the thought of her husband. She didn't mind to reply anything but she knew she will find her soon.

"Anu..." Her voice softened when she saw her on the floor holding the metal barricade for support.

"You can't be so weak, Anu. Laura and Saahil still trying to find him. Please have hope, I can't see you like this, my child." She held her head to her shoulder and let her breathe a little by planting some hopes inside her. Saahil who was doing his postgraduate also trying to find a lead about Jhanvi and Shivaay who both went missing.

"I don't know... But I could feel... He would be in pain..." She told in-between her sobs holding her pendant.

"Where will he go, Anu? We will find him. Laura is also with Bhavya trying to fetch information. Just have patience, my dear." Catherine consoled her when she cried helplessly.

"He did that because he loved me, why did I link it with my situation and hurted him? Why did I do that?" She asked her with teary eyes.

"Sometimes it happens, dear! Without even our control! But it has been three years." She told her rubbing her forearm which was around her.

"When he said those words, how would be terribly upset with my words, right? I could see the pain in his eyes, but I went on with my accusations and my decision." She said recalling the past when she decided to cut off the threads.

"Come on, Anika. Nothing is finished. You're still his wife. You both didn't get divorced yet. Have hope! Forget what's the day tomorrow?" Catherine asked, thinking about those tears rushing even faster.

"I must be the worst wife in the entire world, because of me not only one but two souls suffering in pain, one knowing about it and the other without knowing how her mom ruined her life by separating her from her father." Anika sighed, thinking about her two-year-old daughter who's sleeping peacefully in her room by not knowing what her mom did with her life.

"And it would be her second birthday celebrating without her father and her grandmother," Anika told. The hesitations and baseless anger faded away in a second when she found out she was pregnant as soon as she relocated to Dubai. And Shivaay was the first person she dialed to reveal this news to him. But from then, to now, all she could hear was the same message. Her pregnancy never went happier, every second, every moment she spent with tears and missing him. From the first sonogram picture till she gets her baby in her hand. Catherine and Laura left everything and decided to be with her when she shared the news of her pregnancy with them while saahil was stuck in Germany with his post-graduation. She even tried calling tej to know about them, but he didn't respond to any of her calls. She stopped herself from talking about her baby since she couldn't trust him and was scared, he would separate her from her child. He could do that in every sense.

"I promise, on her third birthday, you will be celebrating with her family. This time, we will search them in every possible nook and corner." Catherine promised. And held her up to the room where her daughter sleeping peacefully having no idea what was ahead of her.

"Wish you a very happy birthday, my darling Aishi. I hope your daddy is here to wish you." She said kissing her forehead. Soon she turned around her little body and wrapped her little arms around her mom's neck. Anika securely kissed her head and pulled her little body upwards and tried to get some peace but her mind still revolves around her husband. As for now, Aishi was her only driving reason.

***

Anika widened the curtain up when she saw her two-year-old woke up but stayed stubborn to open her eyes since she guessed it was her special day, and whenever her Cathy that's what she used to call her Catherine takes her name, repeatedly, she will confirm that something will definitely be going on with her. When she celebrated her first birthday, obviously she didn't know anything as she started to speak and walk very newly but now, she understood she's the special person in the household where everyone around her was willing to be her servant, not because she's the youngest but also the cutest and smartest baby in the entire world.

"Aishi..." Anika called her, but she turned around on purpose, such a drama queen. But Anika pulled her baby to her lap and showered her with kisses.

"Happy birthday to the cutest, happiest and funniest baby in the entire world," Anika spoke in between her breaths and started tickling her. Aishi's voice broke out with chuckles when her mom tickled her in the stomach.

"Op it. Mumma..." She said in between her laughs and held her to her lips and kissed her forehead.

"I love you so so so much, Baby." She spelled.

"I luv you..." She replied to her. She recently started to learn to say I love you, Even though her two-year-old couldn't say it properly, Aishi makes sure she lights Anika's mood everyday whenever she's down.

"You know why I love you so much," Anika asked her daughter, who did nothing but smiled at looking at her mother with so much love in her eyes. Even though her daughter didn't understand what she was saying, her eyes were responding to her.

"Because you're looking just like your daddy" She looked at his picture which was next to the bed. She held it in her hand and smiled, "Copy... Paste" Anika said looking at her daughter. Aishi crawled to Anika's lap and sat on her lap.

"Daddy..." She said looking at the picture, Anika didn't wonder, because it was obvious from Aishi's side to call him daddy looking at his picture as Anika speaks with her pointing at shivaay in every conversation.

While then, their apartment calling bell rang, she guessed Catherine must have attended the door, but she was silent, suspiciously Anika turned around and saw her brother approaching with a large teddy bear and called Aishi in his peak tone. Aishi screamed and jumped at her uncle who loaded her kisses and gifts.

"Happy... Happy... Happy birthday, my love." Saahil said in-between his kisses, Aishi laughed aloud and kissed him back. Her blue orbs shinned when he gifted her a huge panda and the Moana dress which she adores. She cupped her cheeks and jumped at the same place when Saahil opened the gift for her.

"Ake way... Ake way... Moana..." Aishi automatically started to sing when Saahil checked the size of the dress of her while measuring it outside.

"I guess we can't use it after today, it looks quite tight on her," Catherine said.

"But I bought it for age three kids." Saahil frowned.

"Aww... We will click as many pictures as possible we could today, okay, princess Moana?" Catherine said and called Aishi to her, Aishi quickly jumped to her and kissed her cheek. She thought her relationship with her aunt stayed till the existence of her grandmother. But she stayed, as her support when she had nobody. And loves her unconditionally like her own daughter. She still remembers how she held her palm and cried unconditionally when she gave birth, and she was the one who held Aishi first in her hands. Again, it was shivaay's idea to invite her for Christmas.

"Sista..." Saahil finally saw her sister who looked desperate to hug him, more than the comfort, she needed information. Saahil walked towards her and hugged her warmly. He planted a quick kiss on her forehead.

"Fine?" Saahil asked her.

"How am I looking?" Anika asked him in return.

"Terrible!" Saahil replied to her.

"Exactly, listen..." Anika held her brother's palm and looked at his eyes back while having tears in her eyes. "Any information about him?" Anika asked. Saahil stayed silent but he opened his mouth drawing a deep breath. "No, Sista... Sorry..."

Anika couldn't control her tears, tears leaked from her eyes when she dropped her brother's palm abruptly. She couldn't even focus on anything. She was losing hope every passing day and felt like dying when she realized he was not there next to her. Saahil just looked at her, even though he wanted to yell at her for her stupidity, he stayed silent thinking there was no use in yelling at her.

"I can able feel, how he would have felt when we suddenly disappeared from his life before 11 years. At least, we have proof that he's alive through Tej Singh Oberoi's tweet, but he had nothing over then, right. I think I am paying back." She said and wiped off her tears.

"Your situation right now is different, you have his child with you," Saahil argued as he couldn't see his sister blaming her every moment.

"Is that even an excuse? He didn't know anything about Aishi, if he knows saahil, do you think he would have left me in the same situation?" Anika said, he had no answer to it, but soon Anika composed herself and wiped her tears off.

"Sista, not today, please. Not for anyone but your daughter." Saahil said to her.

"Seems like only one option left with us," Anika said to him, Sahil's face hardens.

"Tej Singh Oberoi."  Anika spelled those words. 

****