We see Y/n and Paimon standing in a circle-y ground in Jueyun Karst. They were currently looking for some adepti folks, when outta no-where a voice is heard.

Adeptus: And who might you be? Those that dare enter Jueyun Karst.

Moon Carver 'Maybe knows Santa'

Y/n: Just a guy who's a traveler for fun.

Paimon: And Paimon!

Y/n: Take a look at this.

Reaching into your trusty bag, you pull out the sigil "Childe" gave you.

Moon Carver: A Sigil of Permission... Many a season has passed since one was in the presence of such item... He before you is the might and illuminated adeptus, Moon Carver. Speak, Traveler. What business do you have?

Y/n: You see... Everyone is calling me sus back the-

Millelith#1: It's him! The assassin! He dared to flee here in Jueyun Karst.

Y/n: Oh, for fuck's sake...

A group of Millelith are seen standing on the other side of the circle, the same place where you first entered.

Millelith#2: Sir, we've already stepped too far into Jueyun Karst ourselves...

Millelith Sergeant: Ugh... There's no choice. Apprehending the assassin is our top priority, we must press on!

Moon Carver: Disturbing our borders... See them gone, Traveler. One will not have interruption.

Not having much of a choice, you got ready for a fight. Why did you comply? Well... You kinda need him in a good mood for him to help you out now.

Y/n: Only spears, eh?

Three of the fifteen Millelith charge at you with their spears in hand.

You charge up your Anemo powers as you jump over them with it.

Y/n: Don't try it! I know Kung-Fu, Karate, Ju-Jitsu, and twenty other dangerous words!

Millelith Sergeant: Take the target alive!

Y/n: Bad idea. NIIINJAAA GO!

You proceed to spin like a MOTHERFUCKING beyblade become a big ass tornado. A STORM THAT IS APPROOOOOA- I really should stop.

You sucked in 4 of them, as the others are running away from your tornado. You suddenly stop before raising your arms making the Four Millelith fly off, two of them hit their comrades while the other two fall down on the ground. - 8 remains.

Y/n:

Millelith#2: Sir, target is insulting us with his dance!

Millelith Sergeant: Fucking dammit! I said alive! Maybe a stab or two can disciple this fucker!

Y/n: I didn't wanna have to do this... That's a lie. I wanted to.

You reach into your plot-bag as the soldiers sorround, you slowly pull out a weapon of mass destruction.

The soldiers look quite shocked as their eyes widened before the sergeant begins laughing his ass off followed by the other soldiers.

Sergeant: THIS! IS! A! FUCKING! BANANA! HAHAHA!

Millelith#4: And here I was worried! PFFT AHAHAHA!

You simply remained silent as you slowly peel the banana MENACINGLY!

Millelith#2: Uh... Sarge... I don't like where this is going.

Sergeant: Oh, relaaax! What is he gonna do stab us?

Y/n: Yes.

The sergeant looks completely baffled and weirded out as well. He looks towards his soldiers as he orders them.

Sergeant: What are you waiting for!? Get him!

Two start charging at you as you, spears in hand ready to impale.

You just dock and slash one of them in the leg as he yells out in pain and falls.

Millelith#3: HOLY FUCK! THIS ACTUALLY HURTS!

The other proceeds to try to take advantage of your crouched position but you pick up some dirt and throw it in his eye.

Millelith#4: MY DAMN EYES!

Y/n: Gonna cry?

Millelith#5: AW hell naw! I don't get paid enough for this shit! You're on your own!

Millelith#6: W-wait for me!

Millelith#7: You see there is a concert going on so... TOODLES!

Millelith Sergeant: Y-YOU FUCKING COWARDS!

Millelith#8: Ayo, Sarge. He is injuring us with a banana. A. FUCKING. BANANA! WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT!? I'M OUTTA HERE!

Millelith#9: BESIDES ISNT HE THE ASSASSIN!? WHY IN THE WORLD ARE WE AFTER A GUY WHO KILLED A GOD!?

Millelith#2: AND WE ARE IN THE LOCATION OF THE ADEPTI! I DONNU ABOUT YOU, BUT I'D RATHER NOT MESS WITH THEM!

Y/n: Oh, look! Common sense! It's rare nowadays.

The other soldiers proceed to haul ass getting back to Liyue leaving their Sargent behind.

Sargent: AH, I'LL GET ALL OF YOU FIR-GAH!

He looks down to his right and sees the banana impaled into his soldier, making him drop his spear as you suddenly appear in front of him.

Y/n: あなたのとても哀れな. (You are pathetic.)

You pull it out for him as he falls down defeated-NOT dead by the way- He looks back to you from the ground with terrified eyes.

Y/n: ... Boo.

Sargent:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tve0xwnWpjI

He was hauling his ass back to Liyue following his soldiers... Oh boy, that was entertaining.

Moon Carver: ... One was not expecting such turn of events. But one is glad that you saw them off. Tell me, Traveler.

Paimon: Well... It's a long story.

TIMESKIP BROUGHT YOU BY RAID SHADOW LEGE-OUCH!

Moon Carver: Preposterous... PREPOSTEROUS!!!

Y/n: My ears...

Moon Carver: The Liyue Qixing... Utterly disappointing. How could one possibly assassinate Rwx Lapis during the Rite of Descension... And then place suspicious upon the attendees!? Hmph... Traveler, of the unjust accusations placed upon you, one has become aware. The mind knows its answer. Though one must consult with one's fellows, lest the mind be misguided. Go. Take your Sigil of Permission, carry with you a message.

Y/n: To whom? Santa?

Moon Carver: Mountain Shaper, and Cloud Retainer can be found here. Only fate will decide if you shall find them-- Only fate. There exists a Conquror of Demons, a Guardian Yaksha. Go to Wangshu Inn, and you shall seek him.

And with that, the Adeptus dissappears just like it appeared.

Paimon: Wangshu Inn... OH! It's that place we saw! Y'know the place built on a VERY big tree. Though, it seems too basic for an Adeptus.

Y/n: Eh, better than scaling mountains... I just jinxed myself. Great...

TIMESKIP BROUGHT YOU BY A YAKSHA LISTENING TO A BARD'S MUSIC

Y/n: This place has an elevator? Haven't seen one on quite a while now...

Paimon: C'mon. Paimon bets he's in the balcony, we aren't gonna find him in the kitchen now, would we?

Y/n: I dunno. Food can't be resisted by anyone.

Paimon: You got that right!

Finally reaching the balcony, however no one was there.

Paimon: Huh? He's not here?

Y/n: Lunch break?

You start walking further reaching the railings. The view was great and all, but not as good as the one you had from the fireworks chair.

Y/n: I could use garlic bread with avocado right now...

???: To the blind everything may not be as it appears.

Y/n: I don't think they can even see the appearance, dude. Wait a minute...

Xiao 'Edgy Thicc Snow-Eater Kirito'

Y/n: ... I didn't know we were in India. But I guess I should show you this first.

You who stans Xiao and commented that you wanted him to sleep with Y/n... Cleanse yourself. You know who you are.

Xiao: A Sigil of Permission... You came prepared. Though this stops me from hurting you myself. Doesn't stop you from getting hurt in other ways.

Y/n: You're hurting me with that edge. I think I got cut like a thousand times.

Xiao: I do not know of that "Edge" you're speaking of, human.

Paimon: Uh... Paimon doesn't get it...

Xiao: Too much contact between our worlds is breaking the rules. Mortal souls are not as robust as those of adepti, nor can your blood carry this level of adeptal energy.

Y/n: Rules are meant to be broken though. You can let this slide and I'll give you some food.

Xiao: ... Ahem. It's for your own good. Leave. Now.

He turns his back from the two of you.

Paimon: Wait a sec! We came here to-

And he's gone.

Paimon: Ugh... Paimon's so peeved! All he does is think about himself!

Y/n: What part of that conversation led you to this conclusion...?

Paimon: Paimon wants to give him an ugly nickname... But if you tick off an adeptus the only thing you'd find in treasure is cabbage. Bleurgh! Guess we'll just have to ask the boss lady on how she's able to talk to adepti.

Downstairs, a lady is seen working in front of a desk. That was the reception area.

Verr Goldet: Hm. Such wonderful weather toda-

THUD

Verr Goldet: What th-

Y/n: Hey, boss-lady! How do you talk to adeptus like a normal person!?

Verr Goldet: Did... You just jump even though we have stairs?

Y/n: Yup.

Verr Goldet: Adventurers... But I see that you've already met Xiao if you want to talk to him. Not often he is in a good mood to agree to see people.

Paimon: That's his good mood!?

Verr Goldet: Oh yes, the adepti are very hard to come by. Many people go their whole lives praying to them, never once actually to see one. When the Geo Archon bukt Liyue, he borrowed power from the adepti. But most of them only know how to protect Liyue by fighting. So for many millennia, it has instead been humans who have led Liyue, whilst the adepti have lived hidden away on the outskirts.

Paimon: You really know alot, huh boss lady.

Verr Goldet: Heh. It's not "Boss Lady" it's just boss... Anyway, seen as you have the favor of the adepti, things should be a lot easier. Well... If you wanna know my opinion... If you keep Xiao in a good mood, things should be okay.

Paimon: Good mood? Can't imagine what a good mood would look like on that "Vigilant Yaksha".

Y/n: Oh great. You gave him a nickname... Now we are gonna have to deal with cabbages in all of our treasures. Bleurgh!

Paimon: Uh... Paimon never said anything! Besides its a cool nickname...right? He won't be mad... Uhh...

Verr Goldet: No need to worry. In fact, that's what he's known as. Things will be interesting now, won't it? (Come to think of it... I've never seen him smile either.) How about this-- You go see the chef for a bowl of Almond Tofu, and a plate of whatever you're best at making. Almond Tofu is one of the few human foods Xiao likes. The other is up to you.

Paimon: Up to us eh...? Heh. This shouldn't be a problem for Chef Y/n!

Y/n: You donut.

Paimon: But can't you make the tofu yourself, Y/N?

Y/n: He lives here. So basically his favorite is the one served here. *Whisper* Don't worry. I'll steal the formula. Plankton better take notes from me.

Verr Goldet: Chef Yanxiao is currently on a break. You should be able to find him in the big balcony to your left.

Paimon: Okie-dokie!

This is a very interesting walk. Nothing to see here.

Y/n: Oi, low-budget Xiao!

Yanxiao: Can't you see I'm on a break, kid? Scram.

Y/n: Make a wish Xia-

Yanxiao: Scram!

Paimon: WOAH. This guy's business is as good as blacksmith Wagner back in Mondstadt.

Y/n: Maybe they're twins. The only difference Wag has a beard... And a creampie. Oi, beardless Wagner. It's for the b o s s. Almond Tofu.

Yanxiao: ... I see... If it's for the boss. Then I guess I don't have much of a choice, do I? But my heart is not really in it right now, not enough to make a dessert as painstaking as Almond Tofu.

Paimon: And why's that...?

Yanxiao: A fencer's hand must be steady, so too the hand of a chef.

While Y/n was having flashbacks of the amount of times he cut his hand, the chef of the Inn has a scared look on his face, as he continues with a panicked tone.

Yanxiao: But my hands. I'm... They're not steady... Because ahh, a traveler once told me that this inn... Is haunted.

Y/n: Haunted you say?

Yanxiao: Y-yes. And then just now-just now! In the kitchen... I saw something... Something not right.

Paimon: *Whisper* This chef looks and acts super intimidating, but speak of ghosts and he becomes weak.

Yanxiao: I keep thinking... Even Wangshu Inn isn't safe. I-I can't keep a steady hand for something like Almond Tofu.

Paimon: Alright! In the name of high-quality tofu! We need to check this kitchen out!

Y/n: We could just report back to bossu, but... Ghosts! Heheheheh.

TO THE KITCHEN

Paimon: Uhh... Doesn't seem to be anything...

Y/n: And here I got excited...

Paimon: Uhh...

The guide seems to have seen some transparent young girl behind Y/n not too far.

Y/n: Turns out the man is schizophrenic...

Paimon: Uhhhh....

Y/n: But... This kitchen has no supervision, huh?

Paimon: *Screams in Enchantment Table*

Y/n: MY EARS! I'M PROUD, BUT MY EARS!

You hear a child-like laugh coming from behind you, taking a look you see the ghost skipping outside the kitchen.

Y/n: IT IS REAL! YEEEAAAAAH!

Paimon: NOOOOOOOO!

Back to Dollar Store Xiao

Yanxiao: What!? You saw it too!? There really is a ghost! What... How can I...

Panicc attacc goes brrr.

Paimon: Okay, so he's useless now. Let's just go see the boss lady again.

Another scene change...

V

err Goldet: *Chuckles* Scared of something so insignificant. Hard to believe he was once a notorious bandit.

Paimon: You don't seem that afraid of ghosts, boss lady.

Verr Goldet: Gods and ghosts, I've seen it all before.

Paimon: Come to think of it, others don't seem to know there's an adwptus in the inn, except for the boss lady.

Verr Goldet: Shh!

Y/n: Dis is library.

Verr Goldet: Say anymore and you'll be divulginv my little secret. Right. Best you be off. Go see that little ghost doesn't go scaring anyone else.

Y/n: Hmm...

Verr Goldet: Don't give me that look. I'm not ordering you around. It's like what the adwptus said, mortals souls are not as robust as those of the adepti. So as not to be harmed by the adepti, you can start practicing with that ghost.

Y/n: So ghosts and adepti are somewhat alike? Huh. Still, we don't know where that little gal went to.

Verr Goldet: There is a calligraphy painting in the inn knows as Witness Sigil. It's been in circulation for over a thousand years. Go take a look. Once you have, look for a place outside where you can see the exact same Witness Sigil formation.

Going back near the stairway, you seem to have found the painting quite easily.

Verr Goldet: Oh, and please use the stai-

Y/n: BANZAI!

Verr Goldet: And he just jumped off from the balcony... Oh boy.

Timeskip because... I don't know

Y

/n: What... The... Fuck?

Our protagonist is seen in front of some stones with the Witness Sigil marks on them... One problem though.

Y/n: How the fuck does this work!?

Its been about fifteen minutes, as Y/n was trying to figure out what to do.

Paimon: We could go and ask the boss lady...

Y/n: I'm close to figuring it out. Shut up.

Paimon: But weren't you... Nevermind.

Y/n: Random bullshit, appear!

*Insert Heavenly music here*

A yellow light appears on the ground, you go up to it and stand on it while looking at the marks... All of the parts looked connected as you proceed to hear to clicks with some golden light shining from it. Alas the ghost girl appears.

Paimon: AAAAH! THERE SHE IS! Y/n, you go grab her! Paimon'll give you... Uhhh... Emotional support!

Y/n: C'MERE GHOSTY! THE GHOST BUSTERS ARE HERE WITH MY ANEMO VACUUM CLEANER!

You end up chasing her for like 50 meters. Going across the bridge into some place knows as Guili Planes, sorrounded by some trees.

The ghost looks at you waving before entering what looks to be a broken Ruin Guard?

Y/n: WUT?

The run down junk proceeds to shake as it flies in the air with four arms.

Paimon: Uhhh...

Ruin Hunter 'Even more annoying'

Y

/n: Holy shit... Four-arms has seen better days.

Paimon: Did she possess this flying Ruin Guard!?

The Ruin Hunter looks at you with its beaming eye, it proceeds to shoot out 5 rockets towards you.

Just before one hits you, you use your Anemo powers to send yourself back and with your other hand send a burst of wind towards the rocket above you sending it away from you. As the other rockets hit the trees... Somehow they were fine.

Y/n: Good thing this is an old junk. Well, ghostie. As a wise man used to say... MAN, FUCK THEM KIDS!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9We2XsVZfc

The Ruin Hunter proceeds to change one of its hands to a spear-sword for a hand... Basically a long pole that folks use for jousting for example.

The Hunter proceeds to slash towards you before charging full in. Good thing for you it was only going forward, as you only needed to side-step to the left.

The possessed machine flies up in the sky yet again, ready to fire rockets. However, you noticed that it's eye started glowing brighter taking more space into the "eye socket".

Unfortunately though, you couldn't throw anything at it, as you were more focused on dodging the shit ton of rockets launched to the ground. Some rockets were basically in the place you dodged the last rocket, to whick made it harder for you.

One rocket hit a tree making a branch fall on your head, quite the impact... Or I must say... *Puts on sunglasses* Genshin Impact.

Why are you booing me!? That was a good one!

However, the branch hitting your head made your dead brancells return to life.... Even though it supposed to be the other way around. Let's just say you got an idea.

You proceed to taunt the ghost by sticking your tongue out.

Y/n: You're a poopy-head!

Kids insult towarda a kid. Big brain.

A bit annoyed the possessed comes down to the ground level, ready to strike with the pole. Attack pattern over there.

Charging towards you, this time you side step to the right, but this time something was in your hands... A red, smiling bunny doll.

Y/n: Go! Go! Baron Bunny!

You throw the baron to the ground as it proceeds to dance. Distraction placed.

Y/n proceeds to use the Vietnamese style attack from the trees. Climbing on it, as the possessed doll seems quite amused with the bunny not noticing you...before slapping the bunny away. Which made you angry... Just a bit... I swear just a bit... It's not like you wanted to go on a genocide or anything.

You jump on the back of the Ruin Hunter. Being a machine, especially an old one, it didn't feel your presence as you were hanging from its back.

The Ruin Hunter proceeds to fly up to the sky, getting ready to throw rockets again to get you out of your hiding spot. It's eyes shining like the sun except low budget. Before it was able to shoot, you THRUST your sword into the eye as sparks shoot out from it, before slamming to the hard ground... Broken for good this time.

Y/n: @_@ Uhhhh...

Oh right... That fall must've hurt. You good?

Y/n: No.

Okay, just checking.

Paimon: Y/n!

Y/n: KAGUYA! STOP BULLYING YUU FOR FUCKS SAKE!

Paimon: Huh?

Y/n: Sorry... Wrong Y/n that is still not created yet.

Paimon: Oookay... Hey, ghost!

Ghost: 🎶Silly-Billy hilichurl🎶

Paimon: Haunting things isn't nice! Little girl, are you listening?

Ghost: 🎶Chilly-curl, frilley-churl🎶

Paimon: Now listen here, young lady!

Y/n: You're in biiig trouble, ghoster. To your room. You're grounded!

Dusky Ming: Oh... Okay. Dusky Ming won't trade the travelers at the inn anymore. Hehe. Next time... Y/n can come play with Dusky Ming. If you don't come and play... Dusky Ming will fiiiind yoouuu~

Y/n: ... What did I get myself into?

And it disappeared... Not creepy at all.

You walk towards the doll Amber made for you, and check if it's damaged. Nope, good as new.

Y/n: Oh, thank God!

You pat the doll's head.

Y/n: Ya did well, Baron. Rest now.

TO WAGNER'S LONG LOST TWIN

Yanxiao: W-what... You really got the ghost to stop haunting the inn.

Y/n: Yes...*Mutters* And she's haunting me now.

Yanxiao: Wow... You really are something... I am in your debt. Please wait a moment... I'll make you the smoothest, silkiest bowl of Almond Tofu.

TIMESKIP BROUGHT YOU BY Y/N DEFINITELY NOT STEALING THE SECRET FORMULA

You just watched intensely of how he made the tofu. Noting down everything he does into your brain.

Yanxiao: Haha, my hands are steadier than ever now that's she's gone! Well, Traveler. Here it is. My best Almond Tofu yet!

Paimon: Nice! Surely, this'll work!

Y/n: You don't mind if I use the kitchen for a bit now, right?

Yanxiao: Of course! Feel free to use it however and whenever you want!

Y/n: Well... Heheh.

COOOOOOOOOOOOOOK! Too much hype? Okay...

And now, you're back at the balcony... Surprisengly, he was there looking at the scenery. He seems to have noticed your presence and turns around meeting you.

Xiao: You two again...

Y/n: Hello there.

Paimon: Wait! Don't go disappearing again!

Y/n: Behold! ALMONDU TOFU DA! AND... salad.... Just salad... For a kitchen there was a disappointing lack of other ingredients. But this one has satisfying in the name... So...

Xiao: Oh...

He takes the Tofu from your hand, and goes all in!

Paimon: Quick! Tell him everything before he finishes eating!

Y/n: *INHALES*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4XGJKl7Pzow

Y/n: In short: GeoGod Dead. I'm called sus. Looking for adepti.

Xiao: ... What... Rex Lapis... I... I can't imagine it. Though times have changed, I've never imagined a Liyue without him.

Y/n: (Did I give him more than he can chew...? I think I messed him up more... )

Xiao: The ruling Qixing... Just what rule have they played in this...?

Y/n: So far they are the biggest suspects... Though maybe... They are working with someone with higher power... I could be entirely wrong though.

Xiao: Could be... I will seek Moon Carver, Mountain Sharper, and Cloud Retainer. It is time they made their decisions.

Y/n: So you're going straight to the Qixing?

Xiao: *Nods* Yes, we will... Although I have my reasons to not want to get tainted with the mortal realm, but... Responsibilies are responsibilities.

Y/n: Alright. Careful though, there is a high chance it was them who killed Rex Lapis... So try not to get killed there.

Xiao: ... Do not worry, mortal. It is our duty to defend Liyue at all costs... Though... I do appreciate the warning.

Paimon: Wait! Paimon still has one last question.

Xiao: Hm?

Paimon: That... Dusky Ming. She's...

Xiao: When conquering demons, on occasion, you can come across spirits who have never hurt anyone, yet are also not able to move on. So I asked the innkeeper and the boss if they could keep her for a time.

Paimon: So really, Wangshu Inn was looking after her! Really keeping a wide range of business.

Xiao: Well then, Traveler. You best be off now. We already spent too long with each other.

Y/n: Well, Adios.

Timrskip brought you by Chibi Y/n making Tofu for Chibi Xiao

Mt. Hulao... A mountain in the west side of Liyue. Like any other mountain. Once you reach the top, you can admire the view from there. Looking at the flowing river, and the falcons flying by. Nature sure is beautiful.

Y/n: My legs...

Oh right... Poor, Y/N. Hauling ass to Liyue then going on a big ass journey without rest.

Paimon: Almost there! You can do it!

Y/n: I should be getting used to this... How does Aether and Lumine do it? Well, besides the fact they were doing this way before me...

Venturing off, as you reach a small lake, you notice a man praying and begging in front of it.

Man: Have mercy, O might adeptus! I beg you... Show mercy upon me and my brother... Spare our lives!

Y/n: What in the blue hell are you doing?

The man startled a bit, turns around hastily as he smeets you both.

Man: Who... Who are you?

Paimon: We asked you first, buckoo.

Man: Oh! you enjoy safe passage in Jueyun Karst... It can only mean one thing!

He looks at you with a new found hope in his face.

Dumbass Man: You must be adepti messengers! Sent here to rescue me and my brother!

Paimon: ... What?

The guy bows with his hands together as if he was praying.

Li Ding: Oh, have mercy on Li Ding mighty messengers of the illuminated adepti! I beg you to save us... My brother and I, we only came here because our family is poor, and heard of treasures hidden in the amber of Mount Hulao. It was stupid of us, but we needed Treasure to sell and support our family...

Li Ding: We followed the path up the mountain, but suddenly, the amber... It swallowed up my brother, Li Dang! I ran away and made it this far before it dawned on me. We were trespassers the abode of the adepti, and this was our punishment... I had no idea how to rescue my brother, so I just started praying for the adepti to have mercy, right here on the spot. And at long last, two messengers came to my aid...

Paimon: Uhh.. We're no-

Y/n: Beholdeth, mortal soul! one hast hath heard thou's pleadeth to recue thy flesh and blood. After longeth considering, and venturing deep within thy spirit, one hast finally hath decided to accepteth thou's prayers.

Li Ding: Th-Thank you so much, adepti messenger! I... Don't know which amber he got trapped in, but it's on the road up the mountain. I promise, we won't be foolish again!

Y/n: Hm... Wait here, you desperate soul.

Li Ding: O-of course, might adepti messenger!

You walk back down, making sure he doesn't see nor hear you anymore beforing releasing a laugh you've been holding.

Y/n: H-He actually believed it! Pfft!

Paimon: Well... You did talk like an ancient being back there. Honestly, you sounded like Fischl.

Y/n: Fischl is basically a walking essay generator, she talks like that in a daily basis... Honestly, I has to brainstorm to make it somehow believable. Oh well, that was fun. Wonder if the adepti will show themselve because I'm a fraud.

Timekip brought you by Y/n breaking ambers...

NOT THAT AMBER! THE ORANGE STONE THINGIES

After a couple of minutes breaking the ambers, with some of them containing: boars, squirrels, treasure, and even hilichurls. As you broke the amber in front of you, you hear coughing.

Y/n: HE ATE A BAT! FALL BACK!

Li Dang: Wha-What!? What happened...? Y-You rescued me? Thank you... Have you seen my brother? His name is Li Ding, we were climbing the mountain together.

Paimon: Well... Ahem... Thou's flesh and blood is wating for thee up near the lake.

Y/n: Ayy...

Li Dang: So he made it! He's okay!

He sighs in relief before thanking you both as he proceeds to run to see his brother.

You proceed to walk back up, as you see them talking with each other, they notice you as both bow with their hands clasped together.

Li Ding: Thank you for reducing my brother, O mighty messengers of the illuminated adepti! Like promised, we won't be foolish anymore! We've trespassed in the real of the adepti for long enough. Thank you, adepti messengers!

And they run off, leaving the mountain.

Paimon: You know... It would be super helpful if we were actually messengers. 'Cause it seems like this adeptus has some real temper problems.

Mountain Shaper: Who dares to trespass on my mountain? Who is it that frees the thief from his incarnation?

Y/n: KONO Y/N DA!

Mountain Shaper: Y/n... Hm.

The adeptus suddenly appears on top of the mountain, as it flies down in front of you.

🅱️IR🅱️

Mountain Shaper: Foolish mortal, come forth and receive your punishment.

Y/n: What if I'm into it!? Have you ever thought about that?

M.S: SILENCE! COME FORTH!

Y/n: Sheesh. No need to be so rude. Here I'm walking.

You are now face-to-face with the adepti.

M.S: You intrude upon the sanctity of Mt. Hulao, you destroyed the amber of my mountain and you free a thief whose freedom is not yours to give. The thief's ignorance was an affront to the adepti... But your actions are an abomination of the highest order!

Y/n: Yeah, that does sound like me. At least I got the highest score. But... I have a good explanation. Moon Carver sent me to talk to you.

M.S: Moon Carver... Trusted a mere mortal to be his messenger?

Y/n: Well, at least I send the message and not be a moody teenager like you.

M.S: Hmph! Such disrespect to the adepti! Who do you think you are, mortal!?

Y/n: The main character. Now shut up, and do your job. Take a look at this.

M.S: Is this... A Sigil of Permission? One is surprised that such thing still exists in the mortal realm. In the beginning, Rex Lapis cast them for the mortals with his own hand. Few were made back then, and thousand of years on, fewer remain... Speak now. One shall listen to the matter which brings you here, then one shall verify the truth thereof. You would be wise to speak the truth, for Liyue is not so far from here that one would be easily deceived.

Y/n: Well... You're in for a shock.

The Traveler proceeds to explain the adeptus everything that happened in Liyue. Let's just say... Mountain Sharper was shocked... Wait that's underestimating it.

M.S: Rex Lapis... Assassinated? At the Rite of Descension!? What mortal in Liyue--nay, in all the world, would conspire to commit such fool treason? Or perhaps... The more pertinent question, what powr in the world could aspire to achieve it?

The adeptus screamed in the air, with its wings above its head, like a crusader praising the sun.

M.S: Rex Lapis charged the adepti with protection of Liyue, and we have always honored this duty. As the people we have prospered, so have we gradually withdrawn into the mountains. Indeed, this was a gesture of good will towards humanity. But now... Alas! Red Lapis, gone... Traveler, of the matter you have relayed, one has become aware. One now knows why Moon Carver has sent for us. Once one has done with certain matters here that require my attention, one shall conven with the other adepti.

Y/n: one question... What exactly is the amber? It looks like an oversized Cor Lapis.

Paimon: Ooh! Ooh! Paimon knows this one! Adepti always have magical powers in storybooks, seems it's true in real life too. You know, like how Gras is actually adepti hair, and rivers are actually adepti saliva... There must be something similar going on with the amber.

Y/n: All this time... I have been swimming in saliva. And I've broke some shit... Literally.

M.S: And there you go again. Your nonsense knows no bounds with your respect. The amber is produced by a flower that one has planted here, called the karst crawler. The majority of the plant is hidden underground. When stepped on it it produces amber to trap the invaders. After taking up residence here, one planted many karst crawlers to insure that the tranquility of the mountain would remain undisturbed. Over the years, they have helped prevent many disturbance, but in the process they have also trapped many curious things...

Paimon: Oh... So the amber is alive?

M.S: Correct. Thus one may not leave the place in its current state, for fear of the risk of innocent lives in one's absence. One will depart as soon as one has attended to this matter. One trusts that the matterg of your departure will be swifter in nature.

Y/n: Well, last one. Goodbye, bird.

M.S: *Sigh*... Farwell, mortal.

TIMESKIP BROUGH YOU BY Y/N ANNOYING MOUNTAIN SHAPER

Ah, we are now overseeing Mt. Aozang. It is north of the previous mountain. Quite high up.

Y/n: Nailed... It... *Pant*

Oh my God... Did you just climb an entire fucking mountain!?

Y/n: Yes... Ah... These stamina foods are really helpful.

Oh right, you use the game mechanics when the plot allows you to.

Like the previous mountain, it has a small lake in the middle. However this time there was some land in the middle, basically like a very smol island in the lake. There was a table made out of stone with three seats that are also from stone.

Paimon: Hey. Who put this table here? They even set it ready for dinner. There's even a wine jug and everything.

Y/n: Definitely not Venti.

Paimon: Look! They even have the guest's name written on the seats! "Here sits Retainer"... "Here sits Guizhong"... "Here sits Rex"! Maybe, it's short for Rex Lapis.

Y/n: Wow. Good job, Sherlock. I didn't even notice.

Paimon: Oh, shut up! But... Who is Guizhong? Paimon has no idea. Retainer... Didn't Moon Carver say that there is one called Cloud Retainer?

Y/n: That's... Why we're here.

Paimon: This must be where the adepti have their dinner parties! *Giggles* How about we cook up some extra special dishes for the adepti, we're sure to get Cliud Retainer's attention that way... But what do we cook?

Y/n: I donnu... Tofu?

Paimon: Hmm... People must come here to do offerings all the time, let's look around. There must be some leftovers. Do you think that the adepti might like to try some... Sticky Honey Roast?

Y/n: They won't even have the chance to see what it looks like as you've eaten it.

Paimon: Heheh. True! Hey, look! There are fire places over there!

Timeskip

Y

/n: So... Mora Meat, Jewelry Soup, and Matsutake Meat Rolls. At least someone made a tidy fireplace unlike the Mora Meat chef...

Currently you were holding, the Mora Meat and Jewelry Soup, while Paimon was holding the Meat Rolls.

Paimon: It's smells... So good.

Y/n: I'll make you one later, for now let's offer it to the Clout Retailer or whatever the name is.

Setting the dishes on the table, as you place the last one, you see that the force-field thingy that covered the cave entrance disappear.

Y/n: No one can resist my cooking. Heheh.

Eneteing the cave, you notice that there was a temple entrance door in it. Like the Temples backs in Mondstadt. Opening the gate you enter it.

Right now, you're in a big ass temple. You hear a voice come pitta nowhere.

Cloud Retainer: One feels the presence of a Sigil of Permission. One knows not why you have come, though the sincerety of your offering is clear... Hence, you shall be given an opportunity.

Y/n: Yeah..."sincerety" ...

C.R: Find a way through the abode, and you shall receive thr audience of the adepti you abode.

Y/n: Yeah... It's not like there is a Pyro monument in front of me, and I use Anemo.

C.R: Oh... Give me a second.

The Pyro monument changes into Anemo.

Y/n: I think it's best if we Timeskip this...

TIMESKIPPU IS UNBREAKABLE

C

.R: One is must impressed... The path that leads through the abide defies those of ordinary abilities.

Y/n: OK cool.

🅱️IR🅱️2

C.R: The one before is is the adeptus, Cloud Retainer. Now, speak of the matter which brings you here.

Y/n: Those were some puzzles and a weird see through golden bridge. Did you make the mechanism of this place?

C.R: You summarized correctly. In fact, even Rex Lapis and Guizhong themselves found one's technological accomplishment to be worthy of commendation.

Paimon: This place is huuuge! And there is so many mechanism! Did you really have the whole place for yourself? What's it even for? Did you build it as your private mechanism workshop or something? It's just like the stories say, the adepti leave the human world, find somewhere to be a hermit, and then they research and invent all these amazing things...

C.R: One is simply not partial to the tedium of social interaction and wished to find some peace and quite.

Y/n: Now that reminds me of someone...*Mutters* Oh dear.

C.R: Find it one did... Shortly after which, you arrived bearing your Sigil of Permission... But enough! State the matter which brings you hear at once! You have disturbed the tranquility of this place long enough.

Y/n: It's a long story...

The lad proceeds to explain what happened in the harbor.

C.R: Rex Lapis... Assassinated!? How can this be? Such heinous crime... Who would dare?

Like the Mountain Shaper, she screamed into the air.

C.R: The notion is so preposterous to be unbelievable... One shall have to verify the matter independently...

Y/n: Easy, easy... I already notified the other adepti, it's suicide to go there alone if Rex Lapis got assassinated there.

C.R: No... One shall squash Liyue first, then convene with the other adepti.

Paimon: Did... Did you just say "Squash Liyue Harbor"!? Are you serly gonna wipe out the whole city!?

Y/n: And here I thought Xiao was the edgy one. Calm you feathers! For someone smart enough to make these sorts of mechanism, you're quite idiotic!

C.R: Idiotic you say... IDIOTIC! Only a sufficient magnitude can negate the possibility of further incidents.

Y/n: Okay, take a chill pill. What if the assassin isn't in Liyue. How about now? Plus, you're a damn adeptus, didn't you make a contract alongside the other adepti to protect the city?

C.R: "If"... And it is as you say. But if Rex Lapis has indeed been murdered, then Liyue is in great peril. To delay quashing the threat is to invite further disasters. It is precisely because one does not wish to see further suffering that exceptional measures are deemed necessary at this exceptional time.

Y/n: Now you're making excuses, Ms. Exceptional. "Oh dear, the God that I made a contract with making an oath to protect Liyue no matter what is gone. Best I destroy the entire fucking city!". Get a better excuse, because that one is basically for the filler villains.

C.R: And what do you know?

Paimon: Yikes... She really has her mind set on squashing Liyue. Y/n, think of something!

Y/n: You accepted out offering, therfore a contract between us has been made and sealed. From what I've heard in Liyue "Those who dare to break the contract shall face the wrath of the Rock!".

C.R: Not from Liyue, that quote is from Rex Lapis himself. People of Liyue merely adopted it... Besides "Contract" a cruel irony that you should appeal to the notion after the merciless murder of the God of Contracts himelf. The people of Liyue seem quite content to dispense with their contracts. They are quite adept at taking that which composed black and white, and turning it gray...

Y/n: Okay then, did your contract day it will be canceled after the Geo Archon dies?

C.R: ...

Y/n: Hello? I asked you a question, O mighty and illuminated adepti.

C.R: No...

Y/n: DING DING DING! THERE YA GO, YA BLOODY Maniac! Thinking is not THAT hard... Now. Take a deep breath and rethink. I'm being logical here in these Shenanigans... Good God.

C.R: *Deep breath*... Nevertheless. Since you came here in the name of contracts, far be it from one to abandon one's own contractuap obligations. Least of all, when you come bearing a Sigil of Permission... *sigh* Rex Lapis infused these sigils with adeptal power when he first cast them. That power once aided humans in battle.

C.R: Must if the sigil's power has long since worn off... It is a keepsake now. Even though, this keepsake cannot be taken as proof for you trustworthiness. One must investigate the claims you make independently. This... No doubt, is Moon Carver's very reason for summoning us. Your audience with the adeptus befreo is now concluded. Leave at once, Traveler. And disturb me no further.

Y/n: Mhm. Sure, try not to rage while I'm gone.

And with that, the traveler and his guide left.

R.C: This, mortal...

Alas, Y/N was able to communicate with the adepti, as now he was returning to Liyue to meet the Fatui Harbinger, Childe. Even though, Y/N still needs to be careful not to get spotted by the Millelith or anyone that think he is the assassin.

Liyue Harbor

C

hilde: Hmm... I see.

You explained the situation to the person who gave you the sigil.

Childe: Moon Carver, Mountain Shaper, Cloud Retainer, and Conqurer of Demons. Some of these names have never come up in the intel of the Fatui. As a returning gift, I too have some information to share. Regarding the Archon's passing... The Liyue Qixing's response has really given me food for thought... They've announced that, as the true killer has not yet been found, they are not allowing anyone to pay their respects to the Exuvia. They've even gone so far to try and cut off information... But with the Rite of Descrnsion and all, even the Qixing isn't able to keep a lid on things.

Paimon: The Exuvia?

Childe: It's common knowledge in Liyue that Rex Lapis is also an adeptus. The Geo Archon is the God of Contracts, also known as the Exuvia, Prime of the Adepti. The mighty and illuminated adepti of today have all signed contracts to protect Liyue way back then.

Paimon: Yeah, we've heard it from Moon Carver...

Childe: As you know, they both have the responsibility and aptitude for the job. If the ruling Qixing becomes unable to perform their duty properly, the adepti will have the right to take correct action. The Geo Archon's spirit has risen, so why would the Qixing hide his vessel? Truly suspicious...

Y/n: Maybe... They're doing experiments on the body? To find out how exactly did he die? Or... Something else... Good grief...

Paimon: If the Liyue Qixing won't allow anyone near the Exuvia. Then Y/n's quest to find the Seven is already over!

Y/n: (You absolute moron!)

Childe: Oh, you're looking for the Seven? And just why might that be, pray tell?

Y/n: Unlimited supply of Primogems.

Childe: Uh... What?

Y/n: Yes.

Childe: Oh.. Oooh! I see, you're trying to make me confused. Quite mischievous, Honorary Knight. But then again, it's good for you. After all, you wouldn't wanna be nuked by the Fatui now, would you? But... I can help you with the Seven, you know.

Y/n: What's the catch?

Childe: Oh... You hurt me.

Paimon: Didn't you say not to get juked by the Fatui?

Childe: Right. Give me some time... Time to find someone. Some who can help you break through this stalemate.

ZHONGLI! ZHONGLI! ZHONGLI! Ah-Ahem... Sorry. Got too excited.

Childe: Truly fascinating. The harder they try to silence the situation, the greater the chaos erupts.

Y/n: That's not really anything new...

Childe: Well, if you want to be around to see how it all crashes down, best you stay alive until we meet, yes?

Y/n: Easy enough.

And he entered the Northland Bank, to do whatever.

Currently you were walking downstairs, reaching the streets, getting your SNEAK skill to use. Hiding in the grass...

Until someone from behind you covers your eyes... How you didn't notice them... Plot.

???: Hehe... Guess wh-WAH!

JUDO TAKEDOWN. You grab the person's arm and flip them from above you, as they hit a bush.

???: Ouch! Y/n, that was mean! Is this how you treat your cooking buddy?

Y/n: ... Oh. Hey, Xiangling.

Xiangling: Hey, Y/N!

Paimon: Yeah, this is normal.

The bear proceeds to wave.

Y/n: Hello, Guoba.

Well...this is awkward.... Let's just leave it here.

_______________________________________

Yo... Sorry for the wait. It's been like a week and a half... I think. Y'know... Exams... Suck... Send help.

God, it's so tiring. And I just hit my head on the door frame a few minutes ago... I don't know why I'm telling you this, but thought it might make you laugh.

7,400+ words.... Hope this is good for you, and not making it too long with no interesting stuff happening.

So how was it? Good? Bad? C-C-CRINGE?

This is a nice picture, I thought I might share it with you.

DashingBanana... Barks?