Merrick

I have a sleepless night that day. Not just because I couldn't rest but because I couldn't take my eyes off Zelina the whole time. I keep replaying what she said last night again and again, and as I look at her now, I can't help but think about our kiss. I have no words to describe how much I liked being wrapped in her sweet scent and the feel of her soft lips against mine. It's strange that my company has been manufacturing a number of exotic perfumes but nothing compares to how good she smells.

She dozed off soon after that kiss, and I couldn't get to ask her something that was on my mind. I stand up and smile, wondering why it felt so good to have her in my arms.

I get a chance to notice now that she looks so beautiful while sleeping. I wish I could stare at her all day. I did that all night yesterday, but it still doesn't seem enough for me. I can see her face through her blonde hair sprawled out as she sleeps on her stomach.

I know I am acting stupid, but it seems like I can't take the grin off my face. I shake my head feeling ridiculous, and walk to the bathroom to freshen up. I don't wanna wake her up, so when I get out of the bathroom, I walk out of the door quietly. It's around eight in the morning, and I make my way to the gym, thinking about making most of my time while Zelina is asleep. I know Claire would be up by now, and I should be ready for breakfast.

I have a closet in my gym, so after I am done with my routine, I take a shower and dress up.

I am not sure if I'll be able to go office today, so I send a quick text to Sarah, letting her know that I am taking the day off.

As I walk up the stairs after putting my phone back, I find Claire standing outside my room. I knew Claire wouldn't mind if Zelina spent the night in my room. She has been with me for a long time, and no one knows better than her about how careful I am around women. She didn't have to worry because I would never try to touch a woman inappropriately, not even in my dreams.

And suddenly, it makes me think about what Monica said right before she left. Hell, I can't help but wonder if I've been careful to a point that my fiancee left me?

Why am I like this? Why can't I let loose? Why can't forget things easily?

I wish I wasn't so guarded. I wish I was more daring, but I try to remind myself that's not the reason why Monica left. The last encounter that I had with her made me realize that she is a crazy woman who doesn't know what she wants in her life. The way she acted in front of her boyfriend frustrated me, and I just hope I don't get to see her face ever again.

"Good morning," Claire says with a warm smile when I reach up to her.

"Good morning, Claire." I greet her back.

"Take this. Perfectly washed and dried." She says, and I take Zelina's dress from her. "How is she now?" She asks.

"Umm...She was sleeping when I left." I answer.

"Okay, make sure you ask her now," She says. "And don't forget to bring her down for breakfast." She smiles at me before she makes her way toward the stairs.

After Claire leaves, I turn around and twist the knob slowly, thinking Zelina would be still sleeping but when I walk inside, I see her standing by the window. I close the door behind me, and at the same time, she turns to look at me. She takes in me, and I wish I could read what's going on in her mind.

"How are you?" I ask her when she looks up to meet my eyes.

"How do I look?" She asks suddenly and this time, I let my eyes trail down her body. She is still wearing my shirt. I don't know if she is talking about her mood or what she is wearing. Regardless, I want to tell her that she looks amazing. That she looks beautiful. I want to tell her that I can watch her in my shirt all day, but none of that comes out of my mouth.

When I stare at her without saying anything, she laughs softly. "Merrick, I am good now."

I look into her eyes and clear my throat, feeling stupid. "I think you'd want this. It's done."

"Thank you." She says as she reaches for her dress. "I am sorry I was getting too comfortable in your shirt." She smiles sheepishly, looking at me. I again feel like I should say something, but I don't. What the hell is wrong with me?

She looks at me a little confused. "Can I use your shower?"

"Of course. There's a spare toothbrush in the cabinet." I answer immediately, trying to sound normal. "I'll be outside. You can change and come down for breakfast."

"Okay." She nods before walking toward the bathroom.

As soon as I get out of the room, I let out a curse. What the hell was that? I need to get my shit together before I turn up as a total creep before her.

I shake my head and go to the kitchen, intending to help Claire and also trying to get a distraction. I need to focus on other stuff, so I don't end up making a fool out of myself. Claire asks me why I didn't bring Zelina with me and I tell her that she's getting ready.

When Zelina comes down, I and Claire are already setting the table. I place the silverware and then look up at her. God, she looks absolutely radiant. It's almost like her presence brings glow to every room that she steps in.

"Are you alright, dear?" Claire asks as soon as she sees Zelina.

"Yeah, better." She responds as she walks toward us. "You are Claire, right? I loved those cupcakes you made." She glances at me and then turns back to Claire.

"Aww... you are such a lovely lady but now you are in trouble because I am not going to let you go before you finish all these," Claire says as she points out the pancakes on the table.

"Well, they look delicious. I am on." Zelina chuckles, then she bites her lip. "I feel so embarrassed that our first meeting had to be so awful."

Claire shakes her head as she looks at her. "That's rubbish. I didn't mind it at all." She says. "All I care about is that you are okay now."

Claire has been always caring and kind and as she speaks with Zelina now, I realize how concerned she was after seeing her in that state last night.

"Thank you," Zelina says to her, and then she looks at me, letting me know that it's also directed towards me. I simply nod at her. I can see in her eyes that she genuinely means it.

"Let's not waste any time, shall we?" Claire says and we all sit around the table.

As we begin to eat, Claire speaks again. "You sure are just as beautiful as Merrick told me."

"Claire?" I drop my fork and look at her in disbelief.

"Did he say that?" Zelina asks and I see a hint of surprise in her tone which makes me frown. Did she really think that I didn't find her beautiful?

"Yeah...he has been saying that since you began working with him." She smiles at Zelina and I sigh. "He can't stop talking about the picnic that you went together with."

"Claire...stop it," I say in a low voice. From the corner of my eyes, I can see Zelina grinning. I did say to Claire that she was beautiful after our first official meeting but it was only because she asked me how she looked. Anyone would be charmed by Zelina's beauty in just one look, so was I but I didn't go on telling that to everyone around. I don't know what Claire is up to but with where she is going with this, I am sure she is going to embarrass me.

"What? Someone has to tell her since you are too shy to speak up for yourself." Claire looks at me and frowns.

Before I can say anything, I hear a squeal. "OMG! Is that Zelina Miller?" Anna screams as she stands in the doorway. When Zelina turns to look at her, she jumps excitedly. "Yes, it's her."

She rushes towards the table, stumbling on her way and Claire shakes her head. "Anna." She warns her.

"I can't believe you are here. Can I get a selfie with you?" She asks Zelina as she gets near her. Zelina nods as she smiles at her.

"Sure." She says.

They take a few selfies and then Anna again squeaks. "Sierra is going to be so jealous."

"Anna, don't you have school today?" I ask her when she begins to take a seat next to Zelina.

She turns around and sighs, looking at me. "I do."

"Then stop bothering Zelina and finish your breakfast if you don't wanna miss your bus," I tell her in a strict tone.

"Whatever." She rolls her eyes and I hear Zelina laugh. "Oh come on, Merrick. You've known her for so long and you never brought her here." She then turns back to Zelina. "Me and my friend Sierra never miss to like your insta posts. They are so cool and I love all your outfits. Oh my god, your skin is so flawless. I want to know your skincare routine." She says.

"Anna, that's enough." I say disapprovingly.

Anna rolls her eyes but I see Zelina smiling next to her. "Don't worry, give me your phone." She says to her. Anna frowns but she hands her phone to Zelina. I watch her as she types something on it and then gives back to her.

"That's my number. We can catch up later when you are free," Zelina says with a smile and Anna's face brightens up.

"Oh my god! Thank you." She screams.

After we finish breakfast and Anna leaves for her school, I call Jack. He was the one who went to get the fish from Zelina's house yesterday. Claire and Zelina are still in the kitchen when I make my way to the door after we clean up everything. I step outside the house and see Jack standing with an icebox. I take it from him and when I turn to walk inside I see Zelina standing in the living room. She looks at the box and the expression on her face tells me that she knows what's in there.

"Can I see them?" She asks in a low tone.

My eyes soften and I nod at her. She takes the box from me and then places it on the ground. I watch her as she takes a deep breath and then opens it. She bends down as she looks at her pet fishes that were the reason for her smile once as they lie there lifeless now. I know how much they meant to her and it makes me sad to see her hurt. I walk up to her and place my hand on her shoulder.

"They deserve a proper goodbye. I wish I could bury them at my house." She whispers as she looks up at me. "But...I don't wanna see Jamie's face yet. I am too angry to have her in front of me. Though I know I don't have much time." She closes the box and stands up to face me. "Do you know any place where we can bury them?"

I try to think for a moment and then say. "I have a big backyard. If that's okay with you?"

"You wouldn't mind if I bury them in your backyard?" She asks in disbelief.

"That's not going to bother me." I smile as I look at her. "I am okay as long as you are."

Zelina stares at me and I know she is trying to fight back tears. She gulps slowly before she says. "Thank you, Merrick. You don't know how much this means to me."

She carries the icebox and I grab her hand as I lead her to the backyard. I have most of my childhood memories engraved in my heart from the backyard and I feel privileged to have spent it with my dad. For the two of us, it's been the place where we had our family time. It's huge with a beautiful flower garden at the entrance and then a spread of lush greenery.

We go back and then I let Zelina choose a place. She scans around and suggests a spot in front of a small bush and I get it dug by Owen, our gardener. After she is done putting the fish in, we cover it and I get her some flowers to place over it.

I stand there in silence and watch Zelina. A tear rolls down her eye as she stares at the grave after we are done with everything. "Sorry, I know this looks stupid." She wipes it off and looks at me.

"No, it doesn't," I say. "You have every right to mourn over your loss."

She nods and then she looks around after a moment. "You have a beautiful garden."

I smile at her. "Do you wanna look around?" She nods and I give her my hand. We begin to walk on the path around the garden. I can feel Zelina easing a bit as she stops to take a closer look at the Lillies that we have. She halts everytime she sees a flower and leans down to enjoy it's fragrance.

After we have a nice tour of my garden, she speaks. "I wish I could stay here forever. It's so peaceful." There is a smile on her face as she takes in every plant as we begin to walk again.

"I am glad you like it."

"Can I ask you something?" She says and I look at her.

"Yeah."

"Did you know about Dean and Alexa?" She hesitates before she asks me.

I frown. "Alexa?"

"Remember, my friend? The owner of the bar where we met first?" She reminds.

"Oh yeah, the bar owner that pretended to be your sister." I scoff. "How can I forget her? She was too busy helping her friend than being concerned about her Clientele."

"She was just trying to save me after you got all grumpy for no reason." Zelina crosses her arms defensively but I can see her fighting back a smile.

"Seriously, you blame me for that?" I ask as I play along with her.

"Yeah...you could have easily accepted my offer and spared me of all the drama." She says and for a moment I see the cocky Zelina Millier in her eyes back again. The one that approached me that night and it suddenly makes me feel sad.

I stop and then turn to look at her. I've always wanted to ask her this. I wanted to ask her if she regretted hitting on the wrong guy. Of course, Zelina is a sexy woman. No one would ever dare to reject her unless that's someone as stupid as me.

"You would have liked that?" I ask her slowly as I look into her eyes. "Us hooking up that night?"

I don't know why but I am suddenly scared to hear her answer.

Zelina takes a step forward and stands in front of me. "Maybe yes, for time being because I would have gotten to share the bed with the hottest man I've ever laid eyes on." She smiles as she places her hands on my chest. "Though lucky me, I still got to do that last night." She says jokingly.

I gulp slowly as I watch her eyes turn darker after a moment. "But to be honest, I am glad you didn't. You hurt my ego by rejecting me but I am glad you didn't take me to the bed at the first chance that you got. You didn't see me as an object of pleasure. You didn't turn out to be like other men that I've met, Merrick."

She then leans forward and whispers. "And I am really grateful for that...because what we have now is much better than what I could have had in that single night."