WHALES•TALK
••• Ottawa Rockstar •••

i wanna be your ottawa rockstar
six feet, jumpin' on your dad's car
i could be your pretty boy killer
just another season that i can't control

•••••

A continuation of 'the conversation' bc they still have sm to fucking talk about holy shit why is the lore so deep

(its also my birthday tomorrow and YES i did tell you this for attention. now wish me a happy birthday /silly) 

TW: a lil bit of the Sexual Tension™, mentions of abandonment, unperceived nudity (remember the onsen?)

  Though Lloyd and I finally ended up going to sleep at an ungodly hour in the morning, when I woke, I felt as though I had the best rest of my life.

  A cacophony of birdsong was what I first roused to, the family of sparrows that lived on the trees outside Lloyd's bedroom window singing me awake. I blinked away the grogginess and peacefully sighed. When I turned my head, I found Lloyd so close that I almost startled.

  He'd slept on his stomach, one arm tucked beneath his head, the other tangled around mine. Dappled mid-morning light slipped through the crack of the curtains and dashed gold across his hair, highlighted his lashes, kissed the lines of his face like he were the sole love of the sun itself. His plump, peach lips were parted with slumbered breath. His freckles were so faint from winter that they were almost gone.

  I spent my first few minutes of consciousness simply admiring him. He was warm and supple with bliss. I'd never felt so comfortable.

  My body begged for a stretch. I unfurled, shifting and elongating beneath the covers to soothe the sluggish aches. When my fingers twitched in Lloyd's hold, his grip tightened, as if he were unwilling to let me go even in his slumber. My heart bloomed. I made sure my hand didn't move again, but he was already waking.

  I smiled when his eyes opened to their gorgeous, ruby hue, and he stared back at me as if needing a moment to comprehend reality. He was so cute when he was just waking up. So sleepy, like a worn out puppy.

  "Are you really here?" Lloyd's question was mumbled against his arm.

  It was too early to already be feeling this gooey and smitten. I rolled onto my side and brushed the curls from his forehead, fascinated by the way he looked ethereal even when his cheek was squished up into his face. I was endeared further when his brown lashes fluttered at my feather-touch.

  Lloyd Garmadon was going to give me a heart attack just from being too pretty. What a way to go out.

  I squeezed his fingers. "I'm here."

  Lloyd's eyes found mine again. He lifted his head from his arm and kissed my palm with a nuzzle. When my heart skipped a beat, he nipped the flesh of my thumb.

  I marvelled at how much a single conversation could change us. Before, I was satisfied when I was with Lloyd, but there'd always been this faint niggle in the back of my mind - a small insecurity, a fear so well hidden that even I didn't notice it for months. But it was gone, and that satisfied feeling was nothing compared to what I felt now.

  I never thought I could feel so perfectly happy - and not just happy from being with someone I loved, but so perfectly happy at all. I couldn't believe anybody could ever be as happy as me, because surely this was far above the bounds of the happiness richter scale, a lone data point way off the map. I thought I couldn't adore Lloyd any more than I already did, but I just kept on proving myself wrong. My heart kept on growing and he kept on filling that extra space.

  "You're here," Lloyd breathed. He sounded so relieved that I wondered if he'd feared last night was just some cruel dream. He kissed up my arm and nestled into the dip of my neck with heart-fluttering desperation. The hand he placed on my thigh anchored me to him. "Fuck, I love you."

  My breath hitched. My body burned like a fever, shivered into supernova. Maddening universe, let me wake up like this forever.

  I cradled his head and pressed my lips into his curls. My mind was racing through everything I'd learnt from the night before - but none of it was more important than making sure he knew I was here to stay.

  I found myself on my back before I could even begin to say anything. Lloyd had pushed himself up onto his hands and was kissing me, as if urged to by primal forces, desperate and forever restless. He swallowed my breath like how life kissed away new souls.

  "Oh-!" My exclamation of surprise was muffled again by Lloyd's mouth, and that perfect happiness I was feeling exploded into something even more stunning. I snatched a gasp when I could, staring at his pink, freckled cheeks and besotted gaze in startled amazement. "... hi."

  "Hi," Lloyd repeated, equally breathless. He bent down to kiss me again. I lifted a hand to my mouth with with a sudden onset of embarrassment and stopped him.

  "Ah- wait," I warned, "morning breath-"

  "Don't do that," Lloyd mumbled. My eyes widened as he knelt across my hips and pushed my hand into the mattress. He gazed down at me with longing as his fingers slid between mine. "You think I care about that?"

  My mouth gaped, but my reply was lost in the flustered, muddled mess my mind had become. When he dug his palm beneath my head and kissed me again, my eyes closed with rapture, and I blissfully forgot what I was even embarrassed about. My brain ran blank. My free arm stretched around his neck. His Yin medallion rested upon my chest, contently lying next to mine.

  The room was cold but I was warm, cosied by Lloyd's body heat despite our fallen blanket. He was my radiant sun in this frigid stretch of winter, melting the frost from my unlit corners, thawing my soul until it burned. If there were snow upon my lips, a single kiss would've made it all disappear.

  "Lloyd..." I whispered, turning my head away when he began leaving hot kisses down my neck. I shivered, my inhale shattering. I promptly forgot what I was going to say.

  "Sunshine," he mouthed against my pulse. My hands drew down his bare shoulders, burning and golden from sunlight. His hand flexed upon mine. "My gorgeous, beautiful girl. My Y/n."

  His Y/n. This was the most pleasant of tortures. Lord, give me mercy. Death couldn't be sweeter than kissing Lloyd.

  How on earth did I ever last a week without him? I'd never leave his side again.

  My hand grabbed his chin and tilted him up so I could kiss him again. He eagerly obliged, matching my pace until our lungs burned for air. We did have to play catch-up for an entire week, after all. A lot of kissing can happen in a week.

  Lloyd gasped for breath against my lips. "Good morning."

  "Good morning, hero," I giggled. My hand brushed over his cheek and landed beneath his jaw. "Can we wake up like this more often?"

  "Baby, we can start everyday like this." His teeth tugged at my bottom lip.

  My eyes closed with an intoxicated thump of my heart. Jesus, he wasn't holding his punches - what was Lloyd trying to do, kill me with sweet talk? It wasn't even yet noon. My sigh released with an exasperated exhale.

  Satiated from almost sending me into the goddamn stratosphere, Lloyd settled down atop me like a boyfriend-shaped weighted blanket and contently tucked his head beneath mine. My hand beneath his stroked his thumb, my other coming up to claw through his hair. He melted beneath my scratches. Was this heaven?

  It was as if our relationship had been reborn over night. Like I'd been walking around with hands over my eyes for months, but now I could finally see. Colours were brighter. The air tasted sweeter. When Lloyd talked, I heard the delicate tinkling of wind chimes adorning his words. His touch left me blessed and believing that the only heaven was at his side.

  We laid in peaceful silence for a while, catching our breaths while our lips stung and bruised. My fingers traced around his horn numbs and splayed across them. I happily coasted on the aftershock of our kiss.

  "How are you feeling?" I asked after a few minutes had passed. "How's your shoulder?"

  Lloyd grunted into my shirt. "Stiff."

  "Should we put some more stuff on it?"

  "In a minute." I felt my spine lift by his arm pushing itself beneath me until I was trapped in his hold. Lloyd settled into a comfortable position and sighed with bliss. I feared I'd be here for the long haul. "I don't wanna leave for a while."

  I smiled softly. "'Kay."

  I was more than happy to stay here. Human needs were irrelevant - scratching Lloyd's head was all the survival I needed. I would never move from this spot again, and I'm pretty sure he didn't intend to leave at all.

  My blinks grew heavier. I was sure Lloyd had fallen back asleep until I felt a pleasant, gentle rumble against my chest. I glanced down at him in surprise.

  "You're actually letting yourself purr?"

  Lloyd faltered. "Ah... I've given up fighting it."

  I closed my eyes with a pleased smile. It wasn't just that I found his purring adorable and dragon-like, what really made me overjoyed was Lloyd finally accepting that part of himself. Sure, it was a little strange, but so what? Strangeness was always exciting. You never knew what to expect.

  Besides, he was the next god. Purring was nothing.

  "And... do I smell?" I carefully asked. "Y'know, of other people? I haven't worn your hoodie in a while."

  His purring stopped. I supposed that part of him was something he was still displeased about.

  "No... you slept in my bed," Lloyd awkwardly murmured. "You smell good."

  "Define 'good.' Is it like a body soap?" I pulled a lock of my hair around and sniffed it. "Is it like my shampoo?"

  "It's not like that," he shyly corrected. "You smell like home."

  My face burned. "Oh."

  That was way more endearing than vanilla. I didn't need to tell him how adorable I found it, because he could feel it by the pounding of my heart. I was loving this new openness between us - I felt so at peace, as if I'd been holding my breath all year and I could finally take in a big gulp of air.

  Lloyd snuggled his head deeper into my chest. His purr resumed when I continued scratching his scalp, and I couldn't wipe the content smile from my lips. I'd take on any genetic side-effect of his if it meant we could keep doing this.

  "Tell me about the girl again?" he requested.

  My heart burst into a warm parade. She was so far away into the future, and still, he was head over heels. I massaged his horn nubs while I repeated everything I'd told him the night before; everything I knew about her. It wasn't a lot, but it was enough.

  My dragon-boy boyfriend purred all morning.

🍃🍂🍁🍂🍃

  After finally detaching ourselves and dragging each other from the bed, Lloyd and I got ready for a comfortable day of even more resting. We were in the middle of eating the leftover soup Wu and Zane had made for late breakfast when the rest of the team returned.

  Kai was the first one to join us in the kitchen. He had a red duffle bag over his shoulder and even bigger bags beneath his eyes. He passed by us sitting at the bench, on the hunt for a quick snack.

  "Hey, Lloyd," Kai murmured in weary greeting. "Hey, Y/n." He paused mid-step. His bag dropped to the ground as he spun toward us with wide eyes. "Y/n?!"

  "Hi, Kai," I greeted, amused by his shock. "You look tired. Rough mission?"

  "Holy shit, you're back!" Kai glanced between Lloyd and I with utter bewilderment. He looked more baffled than how I imagined the first person looked when they discovered that fire could be created without Uchū. "And you're totally fine?"

  I gave my boyfriend a playful smirk. "Are we doing fine, hero?"

  Lloyd leant forward and sweetly kissed me. "Better than fine, sweetheart."

  I turned back to Kai with a pleased smile. If the fire ninja had another bag, I'm pretty sure he would've dropped that one, too. He swung around the bench and enveloped me into a hug so tight that I wheezed.

  "Oh, thank god you're back," Kai groaned. "I couldn't deal with emo Lloyd for another day. But seriously - you're okay?"

  I laughed and patted his back. "Other than the broken rib you just gave me? I'm great, Kai. Never better."

  Kai stepped back from the hug with a relieved grin just as Nya and Cole entered the kitchen, followed by Jay and Zane. They noticed me faster than Kai did.

  "Y/n!" Nya bulldozed her chagrined brother aside and leapt into me. I would've been knocked right from my seat if it weren't for Lloyd swiftly placing a hand on my back. "Oh, my god, I've missed you!"

  "I missed you, too!" I held Nya tight with glee. I didn't have much time to recuperate after she almost squeezed the life out of me (there was no doubt she and Kai were related), because then Cole was giving me a hug right after.

  "It's good to have you back," he said, before lowering his voice to a whisper that only Lloyd and I could hear. "Can you give Naomi my number?"

  I shot him a stunned look. "What? I mean - yes!"

  Cole sent me a grateful grin and stepped away to join Kai in hunting for food. Nya and Cole both looked just as spent as Kai, but they were invigorated by my return and recounted their mission deep in the Alps with enthusiasm. I listened with a smile while Lloyd's knee rested against my own.

  My heart swelled. I loved them all so much.

  As the others were debating amongst themselves about either gathering snacks or cooking a meal, Zane came over to check on the Venomari's venom wound. Lloyd pulled his tank top around so the nindroid could inspect it.

  "So, Zane," Lloyd said casually as he took a sip of soup. "I hear you're into sharing personal information, hm?"

  I froze with horror. Zane, however, was unfazed by his unsubtle jab. His smile at the team leader was all peace and knowing looks.

  "Look at who is sitting beside you and reconsider your 'gotcha' into a 'thank-you,'" he said. "All I did was expedite the time it would take Y/n to understand the situation."

  "Still illegal," Lloyd tsk'd.

  "We are vigilantes. We have never operated within the law."

  Lloyd's bravado faded into a grumble. "You don't have to always be right, you know."
 
  "But I do so enjoy it," Zane said cheerfully. "Your wound is healing adequately. I do not detect any signs of infection." The tank top fell back into place. Zane patted the top of my head on his way out of the kitchen. "Welcome back."

  I sent Zane both a 'thank-you' and an 'I'm-sorry' smile. Still unperturbed, he just contently smiled back. I turned back to Lloyd and his grumpy pout.

  "I really am sorry for watching those without your permission," I guiltily said.

  "Don't be," Lloyd reassured with a squeeze of my knee. "Aside from that first tape where Borg asked about Traveller's Tea, we weren't recording any super personal information. It's not exactly my secret diary." He sighed with exasperation. "I'm more just annoyed that Zane didn't come to me with it. I'd have liked to have shown you them myself, but I guess he was worried that you wouldn't want me to approach you first."

  I took his hand in mine. "He was just trying to help."

  "I know. And it worked," Lloyd begrudgingly admitted.

  Smiling, I kissed his knuckles before gathering our bowls and washing them out. I had to avoid being clocked in the head with a muesli bar when Cole called for Kai to throw one from the pantry. We were all back to chaos. I barely escaped the kitchen with my life.

  Stomachs content and escaping the team's racket to have just a little bit more time to ourselves, Lloyd and I ambled down the hallway. Our linked hands swung between us. An occasional monk would pass by and send me a surprised smile, which never failed to make me blush with embarrassment. I couldn't wait for everyone to just treat me normally again.

  "Are we training today?" I asked. I was itching to get back into some katas. Seven-months-ago Y/n would think I'd been replaced by an alien.

  "Nah." Lloyd dropped his red gaze to me with a soft smile. "I'd rather just spend time hanging out with you."

  I hugged his arm, pleased but confused. "That's unlike you."

  "Well, I did just bare every messy corner of my heart and soul for you last night, so maybe I just want to spend some quality time with my favourite person," he playfully shot back.

  "Alright, Master of Sass," I sarcastically teased with burning cheeks. Lloyd chuckled. "What do you want to do?"
 
  He hummed in thought. We stopped beside the window and stared out at the bare-branched trees of the tranquility garden. In a few short weeks, they'd be blooming again, awash in reds, greens and pinks. I couldn't wait to see it.

  "Let's go for a walk," Lloyd said.

  I met his gaze with a smile. "Sounds fun."

  After wrapping up warmly and rescuing Dimitri from Kashu, we set out into the forest. We took the path that Lloyd would usually make me run for trainings, but instead of darting around tree trunks and nearly eating shit from the roots sticking out of the ground, we leisurely dawdled.

  Kashu galloped ahead of us on his three legs, chasing birds and rabbits that he'd never be able to catch but kept on persevering. I huffed into the air to watch my breath steam. The winter sunlight filtered unbidden through the leafless branches overhead, its brightness muted by fog.

  It was peaceful. My hand was bare in the frigid cold but kept warm by Lloyd's hold. He wore only a windbreaker and a green beanie while I was trapped inside a thick puffer jacket, and I once again marvelled at his trick of manipulating his body temperature. Birdsong whistled amongst the trees while a nearby stream babbled. The smell of the forest was so clean and crisp that it almost hurt my nose.

  "Do you remember the first time I found you in this forest?" Lloyd asked. "It must've been the second or third time we felt that tug."

  Was that really only in December? It felt like a decade ago. I was a completely different person back then, scared of the sudden, strange tugging I was feeling toward a ninja I'd never met before.

  "I remember almost dying of hypothermia," I muttered. He huffed in amusement, heating the air before him.

  "Well, I remember you telling me you were off limits," he softly said. "I think you made me the happiest man in the world that day."

  "Why, because I rejected you to your face?" I teased, though I knew the real reason.

  "Because you chose me and not the mask," Lloyd answered. "Because I hadn't even asked you out yet and you'd already decided I was yours."

  I glanced up to find him already watching me, and my heart stumbled at the adoring look on his face. I had to stop walking so I could swing my arms around his shoulders and kiss him. And just like every time I kissed him, my heart grew infinitely bigger. My world grew infinitely better.

  The singular thing that I didn't like about kissing was that I couldn't admire his face at the same time. I pulled apart so I could do just that, committing his lines and curves and colours to memory, even though I'd already done it a thousand times before.

  Lloyd softened further at my devoted smile and drew me closer by my hips. The clouds of our breaths mingled between us. My fingers played with the ends of his blond hair that curled up from beneath his beanie, tiny tugs and twirls that made his eyes even redder. If it were even possible.

  He used to be afraid of showing his red eyes around me. Now, they were rarely green.

  "I always know what I want," I affectionately said. "And I'm stubborn."

  "Yes, you are." Lloyd tilted my chin up so he could kiss me again.

  I couldn't feel the tips of my ears and my toes were beginning to grow numb, but it didn't matter when I was being kissed so sweetly by my less-of-an-enigma boyfriend. The worst storm in centuries could pick up with us in its centre, and I still wouldn't be moved from his arms.

  Beside us, Kashu impatiently yapped. We broke apart and stared in surprise at the young dog, who insistently stared at us with his blond tail wagging.

  "Ah, sorry, buddy," Lloyd snickered. "Were we boring you?"

  "I think we just got told off," I said amusedly.

  And so it was decided by our three-legged dog from Stiix; no more boring kissing, time to continue exploring. I leant my head on Lloyd's shoulder as we continued down the path.

  I never got much time to admire how beautiful the forest was in winter when I was racing through it. The floor was the tawny-orange of dead vegetation, the branches stretching and sparsely decorated by the leaves that still clung on. Patches of green moss dotted the tree trunks on occasion, and a gentle fog drifted amongst the roots and shrubbery.

  It could easily be a shot from a horror movie if I were walking this path alone, but walking it with Lloyd and Kashu negated all feelings of unease. Plus, Lloyd looked extra cute in a beanie and with his breath clouding before him. It was a sight I never knew I needed.

  "Hey, hero?" My call of his name escaped with a puff of steam. "Can I ask you something?"

  Lloyd's hand tightened around mine with reassurance. "Pretty sure last night established that you can ask me anything."

  I warmed at our ease and snuggled my face into his shoulder. He kissed the top of my hair in response. I was floating again, drifting away on the breeze.

  "Can you please talk to your dad?" I asked, before frowning at the memory of his expression after Lloyd's dash with the venom made it clear what his greatest fear was. "He looked really upset after..."

  "Ahh..." Lloyd clocked on to what I was hesitant to say. "Yeah. That's a good idea. I think I need to speak to Mum about it, too."

  I looked up at him with a small frown. "Are you going to be okay?"

  Lloyd smiled at me. "We survived. I'm sure I can pull my parents and I through."

  I shared his smile. Kashu crashed through the shallow stream that began to weave close to our path, biting at whatever he could see swimming in there. I watched the cold water bubble over rocks and through fallen branches. Some patches of it was still covered in ice.

  Lloyd's silence wasn't a heavy one, but something more thoughtful. He stared at the fog before us as he turned words over in his head, probably already planning what he was going to say. How was he going to explain to his parents that his fear of being abandoned came from them?

  But, like Mi said back at the archeology site, I couldn't help fix every problem I see. This was Lloyd and his family's hurdle. All I could do was my part; to never give him a reason to think that he'd be alone.

  "Lloyd?" I was quiet.

  "Yeah, sunshine?"

  "... what did you see?"

  Lloyd's red eyes dropped to me at my cautious question. He sighed, and it blew from his mouth in a cloud of heat. Kashu loped a few paces ahead, sniffing at every new interesting smell.

  "Everybody leaving. One by one, until I'm all alone," he answered. "Because I wasn't a good enough team leader, a good enough son, or a good enough student. I saw Morro taking over me and hurting you, and nobody would come save me. I saw myself as what I looked like when I hurt Axon. I was a monster that everybody abandoned."

  I wrapped my arm around Lloyd's. His hand came to grip mine on his bicep, tight enough to reassure himself that I was still there. He watched the fog as if it was twisting into the memories of what he saw.

  "It's not so different to this reoccurring nightmare I have where I wake up and the entire monastery is empty." He meagrely shrugged. "They've all left me."

  "That will never happen," I said firmly. "And you're not a monster."

  "I know, sweetheart," Lloyd softly reassured. "But sometimes fear just doesn't make much sense."

  I smiled wryly. My anxiety could attest to that with a bold familiarity. "No, it doesn't. Still, though, you'll have to peel me off with a crowbar to get me to ever leave your side."

  The solemn atmosphere was drowned out by the delightful sound of Lloyd's laugh. I'm sure he was envisioning it; me, practically glued to him, his very own human backpack. "I guess I'll just have to kick away every crowbar I see."

  I grinned. I could work with that. 

  We walked for another twenty minutes but instead of warming up with exercise, I only found myself growing colder. The temperature was slowly dropping. I huddled closer, thankful that my boyfriend had a furnace of a body. Lloyd noticed.

  "Ready to head back?" he asked.

  I eagerly nodded. "Yes, please. I'm pretty sure my limbs are going to freeze solid and fall off."

  "We can't have that." Lloyd wrapped his arm around me and rubbed my shoulder to warm me up. He whistled for Kashu to recall and turned us back toward the monastery.

  Lloyd's body heat was so cosy in comparison to the cold that bit my skin. I snuggled closer, savouring his warmth and relishing in his scent. He began to step sideways from how much I leant into him.

  "Excuse me," Lloyd chuckled. "I'm trying to walk, here."

  I made a sound of complaint. "But you're so nice and toasty and I'm freezing."

  He released an exasperated sigh before deftly sweeping me from my feet. I was so startled that I screamed, and Kashu began barking so loudly that a flock of birds took off from nearby trees. I stared at Lloyd with wide eyes as my heart sprinted.

  "Better?" he asked with a raise of his brow.

  I slapped his chest. "A little warning next time!"

  Lloyd clicked his tongue and shook his head. "Can't do that, sunshine. Ninja expect anything."

  "Oh, yeah?" I challenged. "Did you expect this?" I stuck my finger into his ear.

  "Hey!" Lloyd lurched his head back with a yelp. He staggered, struggling between craning away from my finger and keeping upright with me in his arms. Kashu began to bark all over again, leaping up at Lloyd as if this were some fun new game. "Hey, quit it! Y/n!"

  "Call mercy!" I bargained.

  Lloyd was almost in crying from laughter. "Mercy! Mercy!"

  Grinning at the look on his face, I relinquished my attack. My arm slung around his neck instead, soaking in his fire-power warmth. Lloyd took a moment to regain his breath between giggles.

  "Not so ninja of you," I said with a disappointed shake of my head. I readjusted his askew beanie to sit more comfortably over his hair. "What is that, five wins for me? I thought the Green Ninja was supposed to have good reflexes."

  Lloyd sent me a sharp-toothed grin. "You're such a nuisance."

  I preened, because being called a nuisance by him was as good as being called adorable. "I know."

  He rolled his eyes. "Straight home then, princess?"

  I pointed down the path. "Onwards, my knight."

  Lloyd dutifully began the walk back home with a shake of his head. Kashu trotted on, excitement over, and deviated only to check out an interesting patch of grass.

  I tucked my head into Lloyd's shoulder. How long ago was it when he carried me through the forest when it was pouring with rain? That was the first time I saw his scar, and the first time we had a conversation that wasn't shy or awkward.

  Now, look at us. I had his earwax on my finger. We were the image of true love.

  I smiled at my own mental comment and kissed the exposed skin above his neckline. The sway of his walk and the cradle of his hold was so comforting that I could fall asleep. I traced the line of his scar above his windbreaker, wishing that it was a little bit warmer so we wouldn't have to go home just yet.

  "This feels familiar," I murmured. Lloyd hummed in agreement. "Now you just need to take off your shirt."

  He snorted. "Down, girl."

  I giggled and caught his amused gaze. His grin was handsome and gorgeous - I'd hoped he'd get to smile like that forever. I also needed to ask if he'd wear beanies more often, because I really was losing my mind over how cute he looked in it.

  "Do you wanna go in the onsen?" Lloyd suddenly asked.

  Startled by his out-of-the-blue question, I blushed. "I wasn't being serious."

  "I am," he said. "C'mon, it'll be nice. Especially on a day like today."

  "But..." but we had to be naked. And even though we'd been dating for nearly seven months and we couldn't see anything through the milky spring water, I wasn't sure if I was ready for that.

  "We don't have to," Lloyd reassured, smiling gently at my hesitation. "I just thought you'd like it. No stress."

  I bit my lip with consideration. It did always look super tempting, and what was Lloyd going to do, pressure me? He'd never do that in a million years. He was the textbook gentleman.

  "Can I decide when we get home?" I asked.

  "Of course," he answered. "We can watch a movie instead if you don't want to. There's a new Batman-"

  "Onsen," I quickly said. "I've decided. Onsen it is. Hurry up, cowboy, let's go!"

  He stared at me, stunned by my quick answer. His brows dropped.

  "... wow," Lloyd drawled. I grinned nervously.

  We arrived home a lot quicker than I'd hoped, and when I was set back on my feet, I found myself no more sure about what I wanted to do. Still, I assured Lloyd that I was fine, took a shower (as customary before entering an onsen) tucked a towel around myself, and quickly ducked out of the bathroom door and into the onsen's bamboo-fenced courtyard.

  I immediately had second thoughts. Not because of the nakedness, but because of the cold.

  "Holy shit." I instinctively hunched against the chill. I was sure I'd turn blue in thirty seconds. "God, how is it so cold?!"

  A snicker from the water made my heart leap. Lloyd was already in with his back to me and his hands over his eyes, and I found myself staring. The milky water lapped at his scar-nicked skin, disturbed by his minuscule movements. His spine was strong, his shoulders stark and solid, his defined muscles subtly flexing with each breath. The blisters from his wound didn't even look that bad, hidden amongst the cloudy steam that emanated from the onsen. He looked like a painting.

  My face was burning so wickedly that I almost forgot about the chill. I dropped my eyes and squeezed them tight.

  "Shit," I whispered again.

  "Hands over my eyes, just as promised," Lloyd said, before hesitating. "You don't have to come in if you don't want to."

  Be brave. He was giving me an out that I didn't really want to use. The heat of the onsen beckoned me. Lloyd's silhouette in the steam called for me. And the frigid chill in the air - well, that was practically shoving me forward.

  Lloyd's towel had been folded neatly atop the smooth stones of the spring's edge. My cheeks warmed even more at the innocent sight of it, as if the green cotton could accuse me of sin and send me to straight to hell.

  Go away, catholic school memories, I silently begged. There's nothing embarrassing about the human body except for what society tells us to be embarrassed about, and society's just a big, mean liar.

  Do it like the Romans, right? Or, more appropriate, like Lloyd's very own extended family. Onsens were totally normal - traditional, even! I should've been all over this like Kashu to a steak. I was the only one being abnormal about it.

  I was also pretty sure that my fingers were starting to turn to ice.

  I forced myself to drop my towel. In the next second I was in, hurriedly slipping into the water with an ungraceful splash. The heat of it burned at first, and I gasped aloud against the sensation, but my cold body was eventually relieved by the dramatic change in temperature.

  I could understand why Lloyd liked it so much - the onsen wasn't just a bath full of hot water, it was a goldmine of minerals that instantly soothed my bunched muscles. The more used to the heat I was getting, the more I could feel myself falling limp to its hold, and I quickly came to the conclusion that I could live in this spring forever. I relaxed with a moan of bliss.

  "Nice, right? What did I tell you?" Lloyd's amused voice pulled me back to the living world. "Are you decent?"

  I sunk until the water hit just below my chin - the ultimate coverage. "... yeah."

  Lloyd turned around and dropped his hands. His content grin fell in bewilderment when he noticed where I was - on the furthest possible end from himself. I could barely see his amused expression through all the steam between us.

  "What are you doing all the way over there?" he called.

  "I'm-!" I reeled back and sunk a little more into the water. "... nervous."

  Lloyd softly laughed. "Clearly. You're looking at me like you're a deer and I'm the headlights." 

  My blush darkened. I turned my eyes away.

  "You've got nothing to be nervous about, sunshine," he reassured. "The onsen is a place of peace and respect."

  "Peace and respect is great 'n all but it doesn't actually make me any less nervous."

  He chuckled. I glanced up at the bare branches of the sakura tree that veined across the cloudy sky. I wished it was already spring so I could see them bloom. I could imagine the milky surface of the onsen a blanket of pink, the cobblestones of the courtyard a carpet of petals. That would be so zen.

  "I can see why you like this," I admitted. "It's really nice."

  "It's why I wanted to share it with you," Lloyd said.

  I dropped my gaze and finally took him in. The hot water's surface rippled against Lloyd's chest, his proud scar glistening and wet. He still wore his black yin medallion just as I wore mine, and his shaggy curls had been pulled back into a knot, leaving his fringe loose to frame the handsomely cut planes of his face.

  My face went hot again. First the beanie, now the hair knot? This wasn't fair.

  "Can I come a little closer?" Lloyd asked. At my hesitation, he offered a solution. "We can sit a metre apart."

  I considered that. "... two metres."

  "I can do two," he agreed.

  My eyes bashfully drifted away as he began to paddle toward me. I found a smoothed stone seat and took it, trying my best to let the water make me relax. Lloyd stopped two metres away and leant back against the smooth stone edge. He caught my stare and smiled, and I diverted my gaze as if I'd get chastised for holding it.

  "You're so shy," Lloyd mused. "Where's my girl who wanted to rip my shirt off before, hm?"

  "It's all false confidence," I said grimly, which made him snicker. I peeked at him from the side of my eyes. "I like your hair like that."

  Lloyd reached up at touched his hair knot as if he'd forgotten how he did it. He probably did. It was one of those careless styles that he made look effortless though I knew I'd never be able to emulate no matter how meticulous nor careless I could be.

  "Thanks," Lloyd said. He nodded at me. "I like yours."

  I'm pretty sure I just shoved mine into the most appropriate, reasonable style that managed to make it stay up and out of the water. Still, I blushed at his compliment.

  "Thanks," I replied quietly.

  Feeling awkward, I tucked my hands between my knees and chewed on the inside of my cheek. Lloyd drew his hand across the surface of the water and watched the wake it left.

  "So... Cole asked you to give his number to Naomi," Lloyd said, kicking off the conversation in a very correct way. "That's a good sign."

  Correct, because I was immediately energised. "Right?! Oh, my god, I could barely stay in my seat!" I leant toward Lloyd. "Did Cole tell you about when he bumped into Naomi last Sunday?"

  He shook his head with a small smile. "No, he didn't. I'm guessing it went well?"

  "It did!" I excitedly recounted what Naomi had gushed to me over the phone - Cole coming to her rescue, him walking her back home, their conversation about rain. Lloyd watched me ramble with a soft look.

  "What do you think their ship name would be?" I asked.

  Lloyd frowned and tilted his head. "Why would they get a ship? We already have the Bounty."

  What? Oh, right. Sometimes I forgot that he wasn't exactly up to date with the current slang. My poor grandpa jargon'd boyfriend - he was worse than my dad.

  "No, it's..." I sent Lloyd a thoughtful look. "Never mind."

  "Cole has been suspiciously absentminded this week," Lloyd noted. "This must be why. I bet he really misses school, now."

  My heart sunk at the reminder. "Yeah..."

  Lloyd noticed my downcast frown. He placed his hand palm-up atop the water and wriggled his fingers, disturbing the ripples. It was a clear invitation.

  Casting him a small smile, I scooched over as much as I would allow myself to and stretched my hand out to rest in his. He linked his fingers through mine and squeezed. His thumb brushed the length of my own.

  "He'll be okay," Lloyd soothed. "We haven't given up trying to find a way to reverse it. Besides, it sounds like things are working out for him and Naomi."

  I rolled my tense shoulders and relaxed with a nod. The steam of the onsen felt as though it were massaging the tension from my brain itself. I could see myself taking a dip in here often - maybe on the evening after my last exam, when I could unwound all of my fraught stress that'd been built up. Yeah, that'd be nice.

  I stared at my hand in Lloyd's, drifting half-hidden in the water. His nails were jagged and uneven. I was reminded of the time they'd turned into black-tipped talons, and then I recalled what he said in one of Borg's videos.

  'I just want to make sure that I'm not turning into something that will make her life harder.'

  I frowned. "Hey, Lloyd?"

  Lloyd groaned with amusement. I'd been asking him questions all day - but as to be expected. I could finally set my curiosity loose, and he was my biggest mystery. I kept being cautious, expecting myself to ask something that was finally too much for him, but he just kept on humouring me with a patient smile. It was addictive.

  "What do you want to know now?" he teased.

  I smiled faintly. "In one of Borg's videos, you said that you thought you were turning into something else. Do you mean, like... permanently?"

  Lloyd's grin faded at the severity of the question. I squeezed his hand in apology.

  "I really don't know," he unsurely answered. "All these changes have only happened within this last year, and Axon..." He hesitated, his face contorting with unease. "Borg couldn't find a reason for it. Maybe it's the venom finally taking me like it did Dad. That seemed pretty permanent, at least until I defeated the Overlord."

  Lloyd said it thoughtfully, as if the concept of his body transforming into whatever his genetics were demanding from him was like picking an extra credit class, or deciding which book to read next. He said it as if the reputation of Lord Garmadon hadn't been breathing down his neck his entire life.

  But there was a dreariness to his gaze that I didn't like, an empty resignation that this was the road he'd been forced to take and was trying to be chipper about it. One of his greatest fears was that everybody would abandon him if he looked like something other than human. He was scared. Of course he was.

  I shuffled closer until I could rest my head on his shoulder. Lloyd expelled a heavy breath and leant his cheek atop my hair. He felt exhausted.

  Would I be able to handle it if Lloyd did turn into something that resembled Lord Garmadon? Could I handle the tusks, the talons, the horns? Could I say goodbye to his faint freckles, his red eyes, the soft ways in which he caressed me with his fingertips?

  I was confident that I could. He'd still be Lloyd, just... differently shaped. Lloyd, but a little bit sharper.

  "Everything's gonna be okay," I said quietly. My hand rose to pick up his black medallion. My chest warmed at its comforting weight, the twin to my own. My thumb smoothed over the carving of his dragon. "Whatever happens, you've got me."

  Lloyd softly kissed my hairline. "Thanks, sunshine."

  I turned my head up to catch his gaze and smiled. He was comfortable again, reassured. He pressed his lips to my forehead and kept himself there, as if needing the contact. I leant into him.

  A small flutter of something white in the sky made me turn my attention to it. More began to fall, battering against the wind, almost camouflaged against the grey clouds and hidden by steam. My eyes squinted. No way.

  Lloyd made a sound of discontent when I snapped my head up to the sky and dislodged him. But no, I was right - the flurries were unmistakable.

  "Oh, my god," I gasped. "Is that snow?"

  Lloyd glanced up at the clouds before sending me a confused grin. "Yeah? It usually snows around the Alps."

  "It's snowing!" I pushed myself off of the edge of the rocks and into the centre of the onsen. "Oh, my, god, Lloyd! I haven't seen it snow since I was six!"

  Bewildered, Lloyd leant his arm on the edge of the pool and watched as I lifted a hand into the air. But the steam was too hot, and the snow began to melt before it could land on my palm. My grin fell.

  The gentlest blast of wind sent the steam tumbling away. I glanced back at Lloyd, who'd lifted his reclined hand toward me with a content smile. I stared at him, slightly flabbergasted. He never used his wind powers.

  When a snowflake landed on my hair in my peripherals, my pondering was abruptly cut. I gasped with delight.

  "Thank you!" I held my palm out again and giggled when the small, white flakes fell onto my heated skin and promptly melted. "This is so..! why aren't you more excited?!"

  "Because it snows here every year," Lloyd answered with amusement. "I guess it doesn't snow that much in the hottest part of Ninjago, huh?"

  I shook my head, entranced. "Never." A snowflake landed on my nose. Thrilled, I stuck my tongue out to catch some more.

  Lloyd slipped his arm from the ledge and swam out to join me in the pond's centre. I sent him a joyous beam at his approach, enamoured in the way the snow would briefly cling to his blond top knot.

  "Do you make snow men?" I asked. "What about snow dragons? Do you still train when it's snowing? What about snowball fights, do you do snowball fights?" I gave a sudden, dramatic gasp as an idea struck me. "Do you guys do ninja snowball fights?!"

  Lloyd laughed at my unbridled enthusiasm. He lifted a hand from the water and joined me in catching snowflakes.

  "We have the occasional snowball fight," he answered. "And, yes, there has been history of ninjitsu being used in the middle of one."

  I grinned to myself as I imagined the ninja flitting about a snowball fight. Zane and Cole would surely build some shields out of their respective elements. Kai would be difficult, he'd probably just melt the snowballs before anything could hit him. Jay's the fastest. He'd be launching his attacks before anybody could see him coming. Nya's skilled and ferocious - that alone would make her someone to be weary of.

  Lloyd would be the wildcard - he had both offensive and defensive powers, and with his recent Wind upgrade, he could simply flick the snowballs right back at their launchers mid-throw. Never mind the fact that he was the best skilled, the one who trained the hardest. He'd be a menace.

  "I wanna be in a ninja snowball fight," I said wistfully. It seemed like so much fun.

  "I'll ask the others," Lloyd offered. I brightened, sending him the biggest smile I could manage. His expression warmed at mine.

  "Go easy on me, please," I requested. "I'm a baby ninja. Actually, wait - put me on your team. We'll crush them all."

  He snickered at the confidence I really shouldn't have. "I'll see what I can do."

  I grinned. We watched the snow fall for a few more peaceful minutes before Lloyd began to inspect his fingertips. He picked up my hand and did the same.

  "I think it's time we jump out." He showed me the wrinkles on the pads of my fingers. My shoulders slumped.

  "Aww." I pouted. "I like it in here."

  Lloyd gave me a smile and brushed the tip of my nose with his thumb. "Next weekend."

  I reignited. "Okay!"

  After Lloyd turned away and covered his eyes again, I braced myself for the freezing air and hopped out. He laughed at the curses I spat beneath my breath as I wrapped myself in my cold towel. The cobblestones were like ice on my feet.

  "No running!" Lloyd called.

  But it was too late. I'd already sprinted inside.

  Because men have the mythical powers of taking negative seconds to get changed, Lloyd was already waiting in his bedroom by the time I got back. He was reclining on his bed with Meowthra curled at his thigh and purring. With one hand, he was scratching her head. In the other was an open book.

  I paused in the doorway, stunned by the sight. It took a moment for me to speak. "You really have been reading."

  Lloyd slowly nodded in confirmation and turned the page. "Hey - what does 'arithmetic' mean?"

  "It's another name for basic maths." I took a seat on the edge of his bed and joined him in scratching Meowthra's head. Her purrs doubled. "I hope you know that this is way more attractive than you being shirtless."

  Lloyd peeked up at me with a red-eyed smirk and I had the feeling that he already knew. He flipped the book shut and dropped it down onto the bed between us. I stared at it, broken-hearted.

  "No," I mourned. It was so short-lived.

  "Mum's back," Lloyd said. "I'm going to have a talk with her and dad."

  Theatrics gone, I glanced back up at him. "Are you going to be okay?"

  Lloyd smiled lightly. He slipped his legs over the side and walked around the bed until he stopped before me. My face was taken in his gentle hold.

  "Probably not," he admitted. He kissed my frown away. "But we all need it. We've never really talked about... that time of our lives."

  I wished I could be there with him for moral support, but this was a discussion between a son and his parents. It was something that they desperately needed to discuss; their feelings, their reasonings, their reassurances of love and devotion. A talk about how destiny screwed them all over but would never pull them apart. A peek back into a painful past and an unfurling of their roles within it.

  There was no spot for me in that room. Not for something as private as this. That's okay.

  I smiled at Lloyd with sympathy. My hand reached up and rested over his. "I'll be here."

  "You always are," Lloyd said softly.

  My heart burst with a detonation of pretty, snuggly feelings. I stretched up and closed my eyes. He obliged my request for another kiss with tranquil sweetness, and the hand that moved to the back of my head kept me tilted.

  I would've kissed him all evening, but Lloyd parted before we could succumb to the pull that'd entangled us both. He pecked my eyelids in a calmer offering. When they opened, I found him watching me with a tender smile.

  "Good luck," I whispered. "I love you."

  "Love you more," he said.

  I groaned. "Don't you start with that!"

  Lloyd grinned at my pissy scowl. Then he hesitated, like he'd felt that urge to kiss me again and almost bent to its will. He sighed through his nose instead and firmly squished his lips against my cheek. He left the room before he could stall for longer.

  I watched the doorway where he disappeared and hoped that everything would go smoothly. I glanced back at the tabby cat and smiled.

  "Just you and me now, kitty cat," I said.

  Meowthra rolled onto her back and stretched. That was a good idea.

  I took Lloyd's spot on the bed, still cosy from his body heat, and petted Meowthra beneath her chin. Her purrs resumed with vigour. I smiled at how similar it sounded to Lloyd's. My mind had never felt so calm, so cosy.

  Snow was still falling. I could see it outside the window; gentle, pristine flakes that drifted throughout their descent. It was a dance that could be calculated through wind and temperature, the earth's placement, the sun's glare. Each dancer could be scheduled down the very minute second. Each could be measured and predicted. But why would you?

  It was nicer just to sit and watch them.

  It more was peaceful to let the small things remain unknown.