Author - _justloveharry_33
Book name - Impossible love
Reviewer - Tanyamalhotra22

Review

Cover :-

All the readers first look for the cover and then decide whether to read it or not . For me , in the case of this book I felt you need to work on your cover . Its just a picture of them three with the title In the middle that too with a font that isnt clear .

So , please I kindly request you to get it changed .

Ps - you can check out our 'gloss creations' (hope it helps)

Blurb/prologue :-

The blurb was quite interesting . It gave a character sketch of avneet and her life , also the intro of a mysterious character shaheer .

The questions which were asked made me really curious to know what the book is about .

Good job on that .

But , there Wasn't a prologue ?!
You Just had a cast list with their pictures posted . You could have atleast mentioned their characterization along with it or could have placed a scene from any one of your chapters in the book to make your readers curious .

I hope you will make one in the future .

Plot / story development :-

The plot was very unusual and rare . At first , it gave me the typical crush-love story type but it wasn't one .

Since , I had psychology as one of my subject , I can very well understand the pace of the story and the way it was carried around .

There arent many stories like this dealing about psychological aspects especially not a fanfiction .

I like how you centered the theme of 'dissociative Identity' also called multiple personality . 
The initial chapters were confusing about what was going on , but later on towards the end it somehow gave an idea on what it was about  .

Good job on that .

But the main problem is , the portrayal of characters or the scenes werent clear .
The dialogues and the way it was presented wasnt upto the mark .

It was too confusing at the beginning and it only cleared out after a certain parts .
If the initial chapters arent good , the readers will most likely lose interest .

If you have time , make sure to edit it or  re-write initial chapters properly .

Also the ending , now that's a major problem . You just abruptly put a end to the story which just unfolded .

We were just getting to know the history of anamika , shashi and madhiha and suddenly , the story just comes to the end with the psychiatrist talking about the disorder .

That's all ?
I mean that's not how you end it .

Readers will more likely get angry while reading this ending . The suspense you have kept throughout the story just disappears in the end .

The last part seemed too rushed that only a glimpse of each personality was seen .
Although , there are many questions still needs to be answered , you just put a full stop to the story without any justification .

Why was avneet experiencing this trauma ? (You are supposed to give us her childhood experience or any other reason for this , but you didnt .)

Where did this shaheer come from ? (I know you mentioned him joining the school as music teacher , but why suddenly ?)

Who was the one behind the letter ? (It wasnt given clearly  , you said it was siddharth but there was no connetion)

There are many questions like this left incomplete , What about the answers ?

See the plot is good but you didnt know how to manage and it is clearly visible that you couldn't connect everything together .

Maybe a sequel which explains about their past would be a better option .

Characters :-

The character development was good in the case of Anvneet . The different personalities taking surface was shown clearly .

Good job on that .

Rest of the characters were complicated .

Siddharth , you introduced him as the guy who avneet has crush on . At initial stages , yes it was good but later on he was a mere side character who didnt have important role .

He was just a mediator in the story while anvneet was trying to analyse the difference in her .

So , his characterization isnt clear from the starting .

Coming to shaheer , this guy was a total mystery . I still dont know how shaheer and anamika/madiha knows each other .

His character wasnt integrated much , we didnt get to know much about him though he is a important character as well .

Like I said , you need to give justification about each character , we need to know about their history and their development , which is missing here .

Major blunder here is avneet's parents . Come on , if my daughter is disturbed or has some problems , I wouldn't sit idle and watch .

There was no reaction from her parents side . We didnt even get to know about her parents reaction which is very important . 

I was hoping till the end to get to know the point of view of her parents but it turned out to be a major disappointment.

Rest of the characters like Ananya and Shanaya had minor roles but atleast they did justification and stuck to their characterization .

Grammar/sentence formation :-

One of the reason why the story turned out to be complicated is due to the way it's written .

I could only differentiate the scenes which has anamika and avneet speaking as they are written using different font style .

There were many grammatical mistakes , the tenses were mixed up and you have used many words that wasnt relevant to the scene .

Eg ; 'flabbergasted' , I mean this word was used multiple times in the story and that too in places which doesnt need much exaggerated emotion to be shown out .

Please sit down and try proof-reading the story once again .

Also the dialogues , I mean I couldn't understand half of them . They were just out of place and didnt really Match with the scenes because mostly they  were short .

You could have extended the chapters  or could have written more lines/words .
But , it was just not enough . It was too shallow and you didn't go in depth .

This story atleast needs a minimum 20 chapters or plus to integrate the plot completely in my opinion .

I suggest you to get it edited properly and make it more readable , so that it reaches to the readers better .

Points to improve :

• characterization

• Dialogues

• Story development

• Justifications

• Grammer

Good parts :-

• Plot

• Avneet's character

• concept chosen (psychological aspect)

Note - hope this review helps you dear , I am sorry if I was harsh but this is only to make you get better . All the best for your future works ××

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