"Pretending to hate is much easier than pretending to love, but she tried the latter anyway, knowing that it satisfied his heart more than hers."
—A Human Named Chloe, 'The Hollows Of Hiraeth'
_________________________________

T h e H o l l o w s   O f
H I R A E    T    H
_________________________________

"Wow." Was the only word that left my mouth as I stated in awe at the massive shop, almost how a factory would appear—just with no assembly lines. There were shelves and shelves of goods—one section of the massive shop was food, of course. There were loads of fridges and freezers all in a long line, appearing to go in order of expiration dates, as shown by the dates written on the freezers. I'm guessing this is where Jameson got his secret supply of Ben and Jerry's ice cream from.

Carter started to walk over to a desk and I followed in suite, noticing how this part was set out almost like a garage, with delivery vans and motorbikes dotted all over the place. I saw as the massive metal door was slid across and a grocery truck sped off. Then I turned to my right and watched as a pizza guy unloaded the boxes from his motorbike. This is now my favourite section of the place; it smells like heaven.

Carter gave in his name and his order, then the chipper woman behind the desk turned around, calling out his order. Few people listened, then a woman walked up to the pizza guy and began a conversation with him.

I noticed, though, none of the employees were guardian material; they weren't big built or tactful with their jobs, to be honest, the place would be in much more order if they employed guardians to work here. Also, upon spinning around in circles to watch everyone carrying out their jobs, it became noticeable how everyone here was actually enjoying themselves. I guess I would, too, if I got to work with food everyday.

The woman who was conversing with the pizza delivery boy strode over to us, flashing us a grin before handing a pizza box to the lady who was serving us at the desk. In response, the woman at the desk set the pizza box down in front of us and tapped away at the keyboard.

Then finally, she smiled up at us, "Enjoy!" She told us and I tried not to grimace at the sudden spout of joy I was being thrown. It was definitely a contrast between the feelings of the tensed and stressed out guardians.

After departing my favourite building, Carter spoke up. "Damn, now I wish I got a job there." He complained and I laughed.

"If I was you, I'd be sobbing; I'd love that job." I grinned at him and he shook his head at me as we continued down the stairs.

"Only you would want to work when you don't have to." Carter finally commented and I chuckled.

"It's pizza!" I exclaimed in defence but Carter just laughed at me. After that we walked in a comfortable silence, with just a small conversation sparking up every now and then.

We finally got back to Carter's dorm, and some part of me hoped we would run into Jameson outside ours. However, I was slightly disappointed when we didn't, and I was back to being tied down by my fake relationship. It's not fake to Carter—a nagging voice in my head reminded me.

We settled down on Carter's bed, eating the pizza and messing around. Old funny stories and inside jokes were being flung around like photo albums as we fed our hunger with a very scrumptious pizza. At one point, we even started feeding each other; cute, right?

Carter and I had just finished reminiscing about a past holiday together when I realised that we had finished all the pizza. I pouted at the empty box and watched from the corner of my eye as Carter laughed at me. I crossed my arms over my chest, my mood only becoming more sour by being laughed at. Carter pecked me on the lips where they were pouted, and the mood immediately changed.

Something flipped, something changed. Carter's eyes darkened as they zeroed in on my lips and I was almost surprised myself when I started to lean in. Falling for my guardian or not, I can still be turned on by pizza and a quick kiss. Of course, this made me sound weak, to which I mentally grimaced at. Then I remembered what Jameson said—he told me I had a 'big heart'. So what can the damage be of feeling too deeply? Jameson had sounded pretty positive as he spoke of said 'big heart'.

As thoughts, observations, assumptions and worries clouded my mind, I felt a warmth on my lips. I jumped back into reality, only to be surprised when I found Carter's lips on mine. The reaction was delayed, the thoughts were still coursing and pulsating through my mind. It was brutal; the amount of thought I had to put into actually responding to Carter's moving lips.

Then, when I did, things got heated. Before I knew it, I was laying on top of Carter, kissing him ever so passionately. It was if Jameson never existed. It's funny, actually, it's so wrong; the fact that I only forget about Jameson when I'm in the middle of a lustful act. Then again I have to wonder, did I really forget Jameson? Next, a confessional thought scared me; I could never forget Jameson.

But I should. I should forget how I feel about him. Not only does it break the rules, but it's breaking my heart, it's breaking the relationship between Carter and I. It's selfish to hold onto feelings for Jameson when I'm here holding Carter. It's sinful, but it's the way I feel. When I'm with Jameson it doesn't feel like I'm breaking rules, I'm not restrained when I'm with him; I'm free, and I'm safe. With Carter, it's too restrained to even breathe; everything has to be a certain way or I'm sure Carter would see into my heart and know my true feelings—then his heart would break. Do I even really feel safe with him? That thought scared me stiff.

It took a while for Carter to notice, appearing too caught up in his desire to be in touch with reality. However, he soon did, a few seconds after, and pulled away.

He frowned up at me, "What's wrong?" He asked, voice both breathy and confused, both uncontrollable and worried. I pushed myself off him, a small, fake smile plastered to my face in an attempt to make it seem that all is well.

"Nothing," I told him, probably speaking with too much glee or smiling with too much happiness. Carter looked obviously unconvinced—remember to remind me never to be an actress.

Before Carter could ask me more questions, I quickly stood up. "I need to go, Cassie's going through a hard time and.." I trailed off, slowly backing to his door.

"And I should probably text her." I finished and Carter frowned down at something. Carter spoke his mind before I realised my mistake. Damn it.

"You've got your phone here?" He told me as he shifted off the bed, taking a few steps towards me. His tone was questioning and confused, a tone I would use too if I was him.

"I–I erm should probably–"

"Sky." Carter stopped dead in front of me and raised an eyebrow at me, waiting for me to stop blubbering.

When I had, he smiled. "If you wanted to ditch me then you could've just said." Carter told me with a painful big grin smacked on his lips.

"I–" I started to object.

"It's fine," Carter shrugged, "This whole thing is kind of weird for me too," He admitted, shoving a hand into his jean pocket. It is?

Carter nodded as if we had a telepathic connection, though, with the way my face scrunched up, I'm pretty sure it was obvious enough what I was thinking.

"We went from best friends to kissing on my bed," Carter laughed, outstretching his arm to gesture to the bed we had previously been entangled together on. "Of course I find it weird." Carter concluded and I have a feeling my face fell. Oh.

"So, we can take it slow if you want," Carter suggested, reaching past me to open the door.

"But now you should probably get some rest." He told me and I nodded, happy that I could be excused.

Carter pecked me on the lips and I backed out into the corridor, "I love you." He smiled at me and I opened my mouth, then closed it.

With a regretful smile, I bid my farewell, "I'll see you around." The tone was flippant and almost flirtatious, and I hoped it would make up for the fact that I hadn't told him I loved him back.

I walked over to my dorm with a thick blanket of melancholy draping over my shoulders and weighing me down. I knocked on the door and, unsurprisingly, Jameson swung the door open.

"Thank God." He breathed out, looking dishevelled as he yanked me in the room.

_______________________________

Yank that tramp

(Autocorrect changed that to 'trump'. I'm terrified)

So pizza

And Carter

With Sky

Ye

Tea

Mm

Same

(Is it obvious that I have nothing to say)

BYE

-still got nothing to say ye tea

_____________
Next update: Wednesday
_____________

CHAPTER SEVENTY-SIX SPOILER:

Why was Jameson in such a panic?

Is he eager?

Or is there something more sinister happening behind the scenes?

Emotions are unpredictable.

Can the mood shift?

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

QUOTE OF THE CHAPTER:

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*