THIS IS MY LAST CHAPTER I SWEAR

Well being this age its the last one... Haha late April fools. Anyways tomorrow is my birthday and a lot is gonna go down. I should be happy and giddy with joy right???? Wanna know a secret I'm not!!!!! I know what your thinking on birthdays your supposed to be celebrating your self right??? Not here how can I smile with everything unless you want a fake one. I hate change I think I mentioned this earlier did I?? Oh well not the point anyways my Dad's coming YAY I guess ,but whats the point if he'll most likely leave again. I mean come on if my friends don't even wanna be with me than how would he. Plus it well be like SUPER awkward. And the arguments I can't handle them no I tried all my life to ignore them ,but they always happen. When I was younger it was Mom vs Dad now its Mom vs Grandma or the me vs mom thats rare cause I know when to shut my mouth. I'm tired of them and this household can't go a DAMN DAY without them. It always ends the same with one side crying and the other just angry. Honestly for me its hard cause its all that happens its why at home I stay quiet. Anyways moving on you wanna know what else I hate probably not ,but I'll tell you anyways I hate feeling alone. And I feel that everyday no on seems to notice or care. I mean two friends I'll call them lets see A and J there you know who you are!!  They don't notice that I've been serparating from them heck I bet you if I told them to there face how I feel they would continue as if nothing just like everyone else cause Sylvy's SUPPOSED TO BE FINE!!!!!!!!!!! She's not supposed to be depressed alone or anything. We can use her and toy with her cause thats all she is just a toy to play with when I'M BORED. Thats how I feel and it doesn't stop there. Most of the time I feel like I'[m just a tool like I was in Elementry school kids only wanted answers to Homework and me being me gives it to them. After that its all I'm good for. I just wish there was someone ANYONE who could just make me feel included not alone. For example this one time A sent me through Wattpad one of those videos people make to send to your friend and she said she appreciates me. I was so close to crying because no one has ever said it to me. And even though I will never be visible to her or anyone it made you feel just a bit special you know? Anyways if your thinking of telling me to get new friends let me tell you. Z and B go together while S goes with J there are two J's. Anyways there my group of friends. And E at least with her I don't feel lonely I feel included or just complete with E in the friend kind of way you know. So thanks Bam YOU MAKE ME FEEL SPECIAL UNLIKE OTHER FRIENDS. Sorry I felt that it should be in caps cause it means a lot to me. And B does to even though she won't know. She don't have Wattpad. Anyways these days I've been so stressed with my mom telling me what to say to my father, him coming and staying at a hotel for the first time, my Grandma's head healing after she fell like 2 weeks ago and hit her head really bad on concrete, my uncle in the hospital who went in this Tuesday, my mom and her emotional problems, my cousin who is with a wife beater and she lets him do it and stays with him, and my second cousin which is her daughter who apparently went to live with her father. And me with my emotional stability thats going to snap soon. Not only that ,but I'm going to a specialized high school where people like me dream of going. Ha I'm never going to fit in anywhere. And the work they give is hard not only that ,but Gym class counts. Anyways I just don't really feel like tomorrow is my birthday and I don't expect to be showered with love and appreciation like I've dreamed of. Oh and don't you change (not talking to my Wattpad people who I only talk to here) your attitude towards me if I know you in real life and see you at school because if you didn't care than than why care now??? Goodnight and for those who care thanks!!!!!!!  HAPPY FREAKING BIRTHDAY TO ME LETS STARTS THIS MESS!!!!!!!