Asher

Life is not what it looks like, Amiri. Maybe this is your destiny. This might be the true meaning of your life.

My mother's words always send me onto my knees wondering why my life is like this. My life has always been meaningless since my mother falls sick. I was going through a directionless path until my destiny brought me to Gracetown. But this destiny leads me to more delusional path due to which I fall into oblivion all these years.

What is destiny? Is it something that makes your life feel empty? Is it something that makes your whole life feels like maze? Is it something that tells you repeatedly that you are nothing and will remain nothing? ̶ My mother always kept saying that whatever I am and whatever I will be, is decided by my destiny.

If destiny is something that decides your life, then mine is an endless loop. The guy who lives his life luxuriously, that common people can't even dream of having ̶ the life of a prince, is feeling empty all over. As if he has nothing in his life anymore. Even though I have everything, I feel like I have nothing at all. Everyone who I ever loved left me. Everyone who believed in me is no more by my side.

I have felt like I am nothing when my mother was defeated by cancer. She was my guiding light ̶̶ the only light in my world covered in darkness. She protected me from the evilness in my childhood, even though she too was tortured by my bastard father only because she defended me. When my father poured his work tension by spanking me, my mother without any second thoughts jumps in front of me and accepts it herself. I had a colorful rich life in other's eyes, but nothing in my life was colorful except for my mother.

My life felt meaningless when my mother died. I wanted to disappear from my father's borders but the responsibility my mother entrusted me to take care of my sister forced me to stay back. Yet, my mother's absence kept eating me alive. So I decided to make my father pay for it by ruining his reputation and involving myself into the dark night life of Dubai. My ruined life was slowly healed by Grace until I ruined everything.

When I came to this reunion, I feel – Desolation, a complete bareness. Through the renewing memories buried in my past, I feel so suffocated by my liabilities.

When my father sends me away from my life in Dubai soon after my mother's death, I was determined to make him regret it. It was the time when I started to adjust through my mother's absence. I was finally adjusting to Dubai night life until my father enrolled me to Grace Central in my junior year. He wanted me to stop mourning and learn disciple from this boarding school so that I can follow his footsteps. I wanted my father to feel miserable so I decided to be as difficult as I can. Within a week in Grace Central, I was officially the school's bad boy. The girls were falling on their knees to get my attention, my grades were forever low, and teachers wished that I would just vanish in the thin air. I was everything that 'I really am not' on the initial days in Grace. I wanted to just destroy my father's reputation. There was nothing in this world; I hated the most than him. But my plans got all ruined eventually when I learned what life is from them.

12 years before...

"Mr. Ross it's a great pleasure that your son is joining Grace central School." Mr. Jose McCleary grins and shows his ugly tooth.

"It is our great pleasure too. He is a very troubled child you see. Since his mother died last year, He became intolerable. Luckily my oldest friends, Mr. Anderson and Mr. Socrose were kind enough to give him admission in this school. I hope he will be very well cared of." My father looks at me through the corner of his eyes.

Of course, He might have tones of donations and now as the member of the board, he could go in every depth. He might even buy this School. But I wonder from where he even found this school. I mean it's in the middle of nowhere.

"Oh, don't you worry about that he is in the right arms, Mr. Ross. All my students are well disciplines and well taken care of." He says to my father and then looks at me to tell "I hope that you would do the best of your abilities to make the school feel proud of you, Mr.Asher Amiri Ross."

"Of course, sir" I grin at him but inside me I was boiling with pure irritation. 'Wait and watch how I make you all proud of me.' I pledge myself.

"Okay. Good for you then." He then dials on his telephone to call someone. I could hear a phone ringing on the other room so I guess he called the secretary. The phone answered in the first bell itself. "Sylvester, Send me someone capable from junior first class. ASAP."

After some time, someone knocks on the door.

"Come in." Mr. Jose says aloud.

A very tall, good looking guy came in. He has Brown hair and ocean blue eyes like mine. By his physical appearance, there was no doubt that he might be in some sports team.

"Oh! Good grace, it's you Abid. Mr. Ross, this good boy right here is our soon to be School captain, Mr. Abid Levington. He would be a perfect guide for your son since they will be in same class." My father smiles his best fake smile on this new boy. I could feel my father comparing his old self to this boy.

"It's good to meet you Mr. Abid. You remind me of my teen self. What is your ambition boy?" My father asks.

"I want to be a businessman, sir. Aren't you Mr. Paul Ross, the great businessman from Dubai of Ross Enterprise?" The boy asks with lots of admiration in his eyes. Even if my father failed to become a good father and a husband, he is a great at the business world and an inspiration to many aspiring businessmen like Abid.

"Yes, I am and I like your vast knowledge about business world. Surely, I can see you becoming a great business man in the future. Maybe one day, you might even stand as a rival in front of me." My father tells him with an evil smile that was only visible for me. The poor boy thinks that my father is sincere, but he doesn't know that even though my father appreciated him, he was warning him to stay away from him path at the same time. My father might even be threatened by this young boy.

"I feel honored to hear it from a great business man like you. This made my day."

This poor innocent boy has no idea what my father really meant. My father is a filthy man who will chop off all the grasses coming in front of him. This was his kind of warning to not indulge in his business. My father is a dangerous man, if he sees someone as a threat; he might even take a step of even killing the one blocking his path.

"You can take Mr. Asher to your class, Mr Levington." The principal tells Abid.

My father then comes to me to say: "You are my heir. My son, you need to move away from past and move forward. Your mother wanted you to become a strong man who can lead our name. She said..." That's enough of his drama. He didn't have to bring up my mom if he wanted to show the principal how much he cares about me. Well, he could see through his evil intention behind all his actions.

I wonder how my mum even fell in love with him. My mother was a single child in one of the richest family in United Arab Emirates. She had royal blood of the ruling family from her father's side. My father was also from an influential family in United Kingdom but as the last child in a family of seven, he left his home to work under the royal family in Dubai. That's when he saw my mom and they fell in love. He established Ross enterprise by my mother's money. Everything was fine in the first year of their marriage but then he became weirder when he returned from his business travel. I was born soon after sometime but things changed between my mother and him. He became more cruel and abusive. I still wonder what changed him.

I move away from my father's grasp and rushes out of the door. I could finally breathe as I come out of the room. Even though this school is in middle of nowhere, it looks like a freaking palace. The grey stoned Victorian structure in middle of a great green valley. I should agree that this place looks beautiful like a Swiss valley without snow.

"Liked the School?" The soon to be school captain comes behind me.

"It's in middle of nowhere." I reply.

"Gracetown is a wonderful place. Just because it is away from the city, doesn't mean it is nowhere. This place is a Hotspot for historians and tourists."

"Whatever. Soon to be school captain."

"You can call me Abid, you know. Come on let me show you the rest of Grace central."

"I don't need your tour."

"It's not a choice, it's a tradition. Why do you have such a rude behavior? You didn't even say a proper goodbye to your dad. Beside, your dad..."

"What do you know about me or my dad? Don't you know the rule-'do not indulge in others business'. So, don't." I snap at him.

"It's not my business. I was just saying that don't talk like that to your family."

"And my family is none of your business."

"Whoa! Cool down. I am sorry if I offended you but let me at least show you to class." He walked away hoping that I will follow him.

A week passed like falling leaves in a tree on autumn season. I did everything that could to make my father's name go down. Every teacher curses me and girls still beg for my attention. Everything was going according to my plans. I just need to get my expulsion and then I could go back to my life in Dubai. The only thing that irritates me is the captain boy who always tries to befriend me. He always took chances to come with me saying that he was a school guide even if I didn't want him at all. He still hung around asking about my life in Dubai but I felt him studying me carefully when I don't answer him.

Abid left my side since yesterday because of his Investiture ceremony which was conducted today afternoon. It was a boring ceremony with lots of chosen captains and prefects marching and giving oath. Soon after the ceremony, I was lurking in the hallway when a small boy came crashing over me. I am in bad mood today as our math teacher gave his shitty attitude in the morning itself on a test I failed.

"Are you blind old man?" The boy groans.

"SHUT UP FUCKER. YOU RAN INTO ME." I shout at him.

The poor boy starts to cry his eyes out, which again makes me angry.

"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU CRYING? MOTHER FUCKER." there is nothing I hated the most than seeing someone crying in front of me. I loose my cool as I become nervous in such situation since I don't know how to handle them.

"That's not how you speak to a little boy you know?" The so called school captain comes by the little boy's side.

He says something to that little boy and gives him some candy. The boy smiles and goes his own way.

"What did you tell the boy?" I ask.

"Just that you are going to buy him a candy everyday as a token of apology." Abid grins at me and I hiss at him back. But I have to confess that if he didn't save me right there, I would have take the little boy's eyes out. That would have made me a life long sinner.

Suddenly, two other boys come and stand beside Abid. One is a very tall and build guy and other one is also tall but lean guy. They were in my class but I don't even know anyone's name because I didn't bother to ask anyone of them.

"Hey, Abid I said to Stef that he could bring his friends too like you asked. I don't get why you are allowing the kids to come to our party not to forget they are just fresher kids?" The build guy asks.

"I guess it might be because Abid wants a particular friend of Stef to come to his party." The lean guy says in a mocking tone.

"Oh shut up! Stef is like my brother. He should be there in my party. Why not bring his friend's too? I don't want him to left out among our class."

The build guy suddenly noticed my presence. His face lit up as if he know me well.

"Huh! Asher, are you coming to the party?"

"What party? Who are you?" I ask irritatingly.

They look horrified by my sudden interrogation. "Wow! What a guy? It's already a week and he doesn't even know his classmates name. Bravo." The build guy rolls his eyes and raises an eyebrow to his friend. "Is this the good guy you were talking about Abid?"

"I am Liam; this is Abid as you know. And the eye rolling fat man is Sam. It's good to officially meet you Asher Amiri." The lean guy, whose name now I know as Liam saves his friend, whose name now I know as Sam, from getting killed by me for his twisted tongue.

"I am not fat. I am build and strong." Sam keeps rolling his eyes at Liam. I wonder if this guy has a problem with his eyes.

"I have a party tonight at the dock near Grace Central to celebrate being the new captain. Our entire batch will be there. Would you like come?"

"Is there girls, booze and pot?" I ask anyway even though I already knows the answer.

"What? We are not doing illegal stuff's we are celebrating leadership. And your list doesn't suit the situation." Abid says.

"Oh! Girls are coming of course. Wine will be there." Sam says.

"Shut up. Sam" Liam scolds his friend.

"What? I just said the truth. But Asher you can't do anything to the girls without their permission and don't tell anyone about the wine. I had to go through a lot to get wine from old militant living up the town." Sam whispers to me. This time I roll my eyes at him.

"Nobody is forcing you. Everyone is invited. Since you lurk on the hallway alone, I thought this could help you make friends." Abid offers. Then he and the other two guys walks away leaving me alone.

Of course I am not going. But as the night came, it felt too boring sitting in the hostel room. I have a single room which my father managed to get me. It is isolated from others so that I could have all my privacy to myself. This is the only thing my father agreed before he left. Since I can't sleep, I decide to take a walk.

As I am walking around the corridor, I am thinking about my mother. I miss her very much. She took a lot of sacrifices for me and my sister. My younger sister Zara, who was two years younger than me, is all I have after my mother's death. She is all alone in Dubai. I am scared whether my father will hurt her like he hurt me and my mother in my absence. The thought makes me sick. After my Mother's death, I couldn't be a good brother to Zara. She hated me because of the lifestyle I lived in Dubai. She distrusted me because of it.

As I walk thinking about Zara and Mum, I notice that the corridor leads to a garden on the east end of the school. I have never noticed this place before. I walk straight to the garden in the darkness. Moonlight and laminating stars are the only sources of light that help me see the wonder of this place. Suddenly, I hear a beautiful humming sound ̶ a mother's lullaby. I have heard my mother singing it before. I follow the sound as I feel it calling out from me.

The sound leads me to a hill top near the garden. There is something shining up the green mountain. As I walk towards it, I see small fireflies here and there, but only few. On the hill top amidst the green meadow is an old willow tree, which is lit up my millions of tiny fireflies. It looks magical. I notice someone beneath it humming the mother's lullaby. I couldn't make out the figure. But I know it's a girl looking up the willow tree. What is she doing?

Suddenly the girl has a glass jar with her. I understand the purpose behind her visit; she wants to catch the fireflies. She is luring them to her by humming. Suddenly I slip on the wild tendrils and falls back. That made a huge sound which scares away the fireflies.

Thousands and thousands of fireflies fly away from the willow tree spreading light to the darkness around me. The girl suddenly turns to the sound ̶ towards me. I saw her face for the first time amidst millions of fireflies that lit around her. I finally capture her feature ̶ girl of Dark haired, hazel brown eyes which lit up due to the fireflies and she is wearing a white satin dress looking like an angel. I don't know why my heart is beating very fast.

Before the fireflies can go away, she starts to jump around trying to catch them. She is not tall enough to catch them. So I decide to help her out.

"You can't catch them." I say.

"Yes, I can."

"You are too short... they are flying so high."

"I need to catch them. It's a gift for someone. Can you help me then?"

"I don't help people."

"Please. I don't have time. I need to go fast. Please help me in the name of humanity."

"What will I achieve by helping you, anyway?"

"I will help you too next time when you need it."

"No. I need you to do something I tell you whenever I need."

"Okay deal, now can you hurry?" She is trying to see me clearly. I guess she couldn't see me clearly in the darkness. So I step into the light walking to her and take the glass jar from her hands. I extend my hands to catch few fireflies and put them into the jar closing it tightly.

I notice that her face is so red. Is she blushing? Of course any girls would blush when they see me this close. She has some look in her eyes that make her eyes twinkle. Anybody could read her eyes. It was too clear ̶ too innocent.

"Like what you see?" I tease her. I have never seen anyone blushing like that. I give her back the jar. For a moment our fingers brushes each other. It feels so warm. It feels something as if some energy passes from her to mine jolting my whole body.

"Thank you for your help. You are really a good person." She smiles.

I am anything but a good person. But something about her words reminds me of the person I love the most in the world- My mother.

"I am anything but good person" I snap.

She looks pale suddenly. I shouldn't have snapped at her but she walk away to the other side with firefly jar before I can say something.

As she is disappearing into the night, I follow her. Something in me makes me curious to see where she is going. Follow the angel- My heart says.

I notice that she is going towards the dock, the party. She joins a little meek boy and a blond cute girl. She is also addressing few more guys. Her face brightens up like the firefly as she looks at someone. I followed her eyes to see her looking at Abid and his gang. Abid is looking back at her with his greatest smile too. His eyes sparkle as he sees her. She runs towards him and gives him the firefly jar. His eyes brighten even more and he hugs her tightly.

Guess Abid have this cute girl as his girlfriend, Lucky him. The girl might love him so much that she was determined to get him fireflies in the night all alone. How stupid it is to fall in love? ̶ stupid enough to offer yourself to the wrong guy to get fireflies to her right guy.

The night seems long... I stand on the other side watching people celebrate leadership and friendship. But I don't care about anything. All I care about is to go back to my life in Dubai.

"You are a good person, Amiri. You will find your destiny." My mother's words ring my mind. It reminds me of the words from the firefly girl ̶ the little angel with innocent hazel brown eyes. I realize that forgot to ask her name, but does it matter anymore?

~~~~
I watch as Hazel walk away from Stef. She has changed a lot.
She looks different ̶ too powerful.

"She has changed for good. Didn't she? Look at the monster I made out of that innocent girl." I say to Stef as I walk to him.

"You are mistaken. She is not monster but goddess herself. You now need to be careful pretty boy because she can make you devil beg for her mercy." Stef says challenging me. He starts to walk away.

"Not until she dares to face me. She will fall all over again when she faces me again." I challenge back.

"Are you sure about that? Wasn't it you who fall all over every time?"

"Not this time."

"Who are you hiding from, Amiri? I saw your face when you heard that she is engaged. You looked like Himalaya fell on you."

"I don't care about her. I have never cared about her." I say more to myself.

"That's true, Amiri. For once you are right. You only cared about you and it's been eating you alive."

This time I keep silence. For once I agree with him. My regression for my mistakes is eating me but no one need to know that.

I walk in to the club telling myself that not everything is over. The memories are too much. But I hope I will survive today. I hope.

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I am exhausted. I didnt even read this chapter properly.

Who do you think that girl who Asher met was?

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