"Love is tough. Love survives through the worst of situations, and thrives through hope. Even when things seem hopeless love will find it's way"

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Zulai

Yesterday brought back so many memories. When I saw him, it all came back to me. The past started beating inside me like a second heart. I could still see his beautiful face in my head.

He was shocked by my brothers revelation. His lips parted as he examined me, he glared at me wide-eyed and flinched. His lips twisted with displeasure.

Tanimu looked at me disappointedly, with a little bit of surprise, hurt and a drop of pain that can only be caused by someone you care about

I winced, with my face clouded by doubt because I have already Created a bad impression of him in my mind. I don't want anything to do with him anymore. There was nothing going on between us in the first place, and I intend to keep it that way. I gave him a dry look and walked away.

Deep inside me, I know that I felt something for him. Something strong that I have been suppressing for the past few weeks. Long after I thought I have given up, my heart still searches for him without my permission.

How could he do this to me? he knows fully well that I'll soon be wed. I'm trying so hard to fight this feeling that I am feeling for him. I have tried so hard to forget him, why did he come back into my life.

He made me question all the decisions that I have made earlier, like I was unsure of being able to spend the rest of my life with my future husband Tanko. I can't believe I am having cold feet.

I pushed all the thoughts away because I had to get ready, my future husband is on his way to see me. We have a lot to discuss. I quickly got ready and waited for him in the sitting room.

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Tanimu

It's already four in the evening and I am still in bed buried in my thoughts, I am in outer space. yesterday's incident is still sinking in, it's still fresh in my memory.

I wished some days could be erased from the pages of my life. It sucks when you know that you need to let go, but you can't because you are waiting for a miracle.

I am in so much pain, and pain doesn't need an explanation, it needs comfort and the freedom to be felt. The thought of losing zulai alone made my eyes sting. My heart is shattered, I thought I would die. I guess you don't die from a broken heart, you only wish you did.

I finally gave up being sad, miserable and lonely, it doesn't suit me. It's not in my nature to give up this easily. I got out of bed, showered and headed out. I am going to Zulais house to see her brother, We have a soccer match tomorrow.

I bumped into my mother and her husband "yakubu" on my way out. "We need to talk to you, miserable bastard", yakubu said.

"Not now" I replied. I know it has to do with my marriage to Raliyat and right now, I have more important things to do.

He lost his temper and started throwing insults here and there. I ignored him and walked away. The last thing I heard was "Your mother will never know peace and would never be happy again if you do not marry Raliyat as soon as possible".

I didn't take him seriously because I know that He has been bitter ever since I told them how I really felt about my marriage to his cousin Raliyat. I was afraid to break her heart, considering the fact that mine belonged to another.

I don't like Raliyat, l never have and never will. She's just not my type. Marriage is the most anticipated event of her life. She had been trained to serve that purpose ever since she was a little girl.

Raliyat is the kind of girl that has been bred and brought up with the idea that her main purpose in life is to get married and be a dutiful, obedient and submissive wife to her husband. She believes that women are created to serve men in best way possible.

She has never been to school, except the pre marital training school she went to, where she was thought how to take care of her future husband. She was trained by a professional, A middle aged woman who knows the tips and tricks of marital life. She knows the art of seduction and the direct passage to a mans heart.

She is a pro at solving couple's problems before they even occur. Yet, the woman has been married and divorced twice. She was once the centre of gossip and intrigues.

All the women in this town envy her, they wanted to be just like her. She is highly valued and respected.

Raliyat has been sick for the past four days, but Yakubu has refused to take her to the hospital. she hardly eats anything because nothing sits in her stomach. She pukes all over the place. She is weak, pale and fragile.

I took pity on that poor unfortunate soul and offered to take her to the hospital myself. My mother was overjoyed, she thought it was a very good idea because we would get the opportunity and enough time to bond.

Yakubu stoped me, he forbade it. He said the only medicine that could cure her illness is my marriage to her. I am afraid I wouldn't be able to give it to her. It seems like her days are numbered, poor soul. 

I reached my destination minutes later, I knocked on the door and Usman(Zulais brother) opened it. He was surprised to see me, I could see it in his eyes. Why wouldn't he be? after the way I embarrassed myself in his presence yesterday. I just looked down ashamed, like a little child that just broke a precious vase.

"Come in, I'm so glad you're here. We have a lot to discuss" he said as he closed the door behind us. He cleared the air, he made it seem like nothing has happened yesterday. Usman looked at me as though he understood all the things he didn't know. He understood my silent cries, and he is being supportive.

We walked through the corridors, but we didn't go to the sitting room where we sat yesterday, we walked past it because it was already occupied. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted zulai with someone seated in the sitting room. they were so engrossed In a conversation that they didn't even notice I was staring. It looks like they were having a good a time.

It's him, the excuse of a man. He is in the sitting room with zulai, he even called her his wife. Not in this lifetime, I said to myself.

She was breaking my heart without even knowing it. The guy was being pert and flirtatious and she was obviously into it.

What is it with him that she likes? is it his massive head, his pointed forehead or his ginormous feet?

Is it his enormous palms or his rattled, sharp, kolanut stained teeth?

Is it his protruding belly, his height or his pitch black complexion?

I couldn't help but wonder. What has he got that I don't? How could she chose that creature over me. This just doesn't add up, it's not fair.

I was brought out of my thoughts when Usman cleared his throat, he saw me looking at his sister and that Animal like an overaged idiot. How embarrassing, I quickly looked away and followed him. He took me to his room.