37. A guilt surrounding her heart

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Mm;
Night,

Swara and Sanskar were in their room with Arshit. Ap didn't let Swara come out of room even for simple work. She wanted Swara to take rest. Swara was busy with Arshit and taking care of Sanskar. Arshit was very happy. Since two days, Swara was not there with him. But now, she was with him and Sanskar also.
It was dinner time. Swara was going downstairs to bring dinner for them but when she opened the door, she was surprised to find maid was standing outside with their food and AP was also standing beside her.

Ap: I was about to Knock. It's good that you open the door. Here is your dinner. You all have it.

Swara nodded with smile.Maid kept the dinner on the table nd left.

Ap: How are you feeling Sanskar?

Sanskar: I m much better maa and Swara was always there to take care of me. So, oviously I will be fine only. (looking at Swara).

Swara shied hearinging it. She avoid to look at him.

Ap: I know, my daughter is so nice. She always care for everyone.(caress Swara's hair)

Sanskar: Indeed she is. (Still looking at her)

Ap feels happy to see Sanskar praising Swara.

Ap: Hmm, you take care. Ok Swara, you make Arshit eat then I will take him with me.

But Swara nods no and says: Let him be here maa. I was not with him since two days. So,..

Ap: Arey but Swara beta, you may get trouble in taking care of both of them. And Sanskar is also not fully recovered.

Swara nods in understanding but she was little sad.

Sanskar understands her nd says: It's ok Maa. Let him sleep here. I don't think I will have any problem and for whole day he was here so, don't worry maa. Swara can handle everything.

Ap get convinced by Sanskar and smile seeing him taking Swara's side.

Ap: Ok, But swara If you have any problem, Let us know. ok?

Swara nods with smile. Ap left. Then only Laksh also come there..

Laksh: Hey Bhai, how are you?
Sanskar: I m fine.

Laksh: Ok Swara, Doctor told me that Bhai may get fever at night then give him this tablet. It will subside fever.

Swara get worried. Still nodded at him.

Sanskar: But why Laksh? Yesterday, I didn't get fever then why today?

Laksh: Because, doctor had already given youu injection but not today. So, you have to take this tablet in case you get fever.

Sanskar: Hmm ok.

He sees Swara was worried.

Sanskar: It's ok Swara. It happens due to injury or medicine effect. Don't worry. I m fine.

Swara nodded.

Laksh: Yes Swara. Don't worry and call me if anything serious.

Laksh left.

She made Arshit eat then she made Sanskar eat. Sanskar was fine but his right hand was still injured. So, Swara made him eat. In between Sanskar tell her to eat also and both eat together. Swara cleaned up the plates and maid come back and took it.

She gave medicine to Sanskar and made him lie properly on bed. She was about to make Arshit sleep but he was already slept being tired of playing whole day. She also go to her side and lied on bed. Sanskar closed his eyes and slept after sometime but Swara was worried. She was looking at him. After sometime, she also fell asleep.

Midnight,

Swara woke up with unusual sound. She opened her eyes immediately and looked at Sanskar. His breath was not normal. He was shivering. Swara got up immediately and went to Sanskar side. She touched his forhead and neck. It was warm. He got fever. Swara was worried. She woke him up slowly patting his face. Sanskar opened his eyes but his eyes was closing tiredly. Swara cups his face and sign him to open his eyes. She took the tablet kept on bedside table and water and made him eat. Sanskar eat it and again closed his eyes. He was feeling cold. So, Swara covered him with comforter properly and caress his hair. So that he may relax and sleep. She was sitting beside him taking support of bed post. Sanskar was still feeling cold so he hugged Swara through her belly. Swara got shocked. His sudden touch send shivers through her spine. She got goosebumps and she looked at him. He was closing him eyes and getting relief. She tried to take his hand off her but finding him getting uncomfortable and it was disturbing his sleep. She left the idea. He was hugging her more tightly placing his head in her lap. She thought to let it be. She adjusted his right hand carefully so that he may not hurt his hand and kept on caressing his hair. She waited for fever to subside as Laksh told it would subside fever. She sees him getting relaxed and sleeping. After half an hour, his fever subsided but he didn't left Swara. She also didn't try to do anything. She kept on looking at him and caressing his hair. Then she slowly fell into sleep in that position only.

Morning,
Sanskar woke up and felt something soft on his face and very soft pillow under his head. He opened his eyes to  sees around and find himself in Swara's lap. Her hand was on his face. She was sitting with support of bedpost with closed eyes. Sanskar was looking at her continuously. It was not the first time he was watching her sleeping but this time it was something new. She was really close to him. He remembered how she care for him at night as he got fever. He was feeling everything but could not able to open his eyes due to fever and weakness. He keep hand on her hand which was on his cheek. Swara woke up feeling the touch. She immediately looked at Sanskar as if he is fine. Then she realized their position. Sanskar also realized and tried to get up, to which Swara helped him and avoid looking at him. She thought he may not like it and get angry. She was about to apologize but got surprised to listen what Sanskar said.

Sanskar: Thankyou Swara.

Swara look at him confused.

Sanskar: Yeah, Thanks a lot for taking care of me at night, and I m fine now so, don't get worried. (Reading her expression).

Swara smiles.
Sanskar: But you should not stayed like this. You might be feeling uncomfortable in this position. You could have wake me up.

Swara (sign): It's ok. I m fine.

Sanskar: Then also. I m sorry. Because of me, you had to sleep like this. I m..

Swara put finger on his lips to stop him.

Sanskar stopped and look at her. Swara was also looking at him. They have an eyelock which was broken by knock on the door. Swara comes in to her sense and get up from bed and open the door.

Ap was there with Laksh. She come inside.

Ap: How are you Sanskar?

Sanskar: I m fine maa.

Laksh: Did you get fever?

Sanskar: Yeah, but now I m fine.

Laksh: Why didn't Swara tell us?

Sanskar: Leave it. I took that tablet and Swara was there to take care of me. So, I m fine now.

Laksh: ok.
Ap: Ok, Swara beta, Get ready and come downstairs.

Swara nodded but she was looking tired and Sanskar can easily see that.

Sanskar: Maa, is it important for her to go?

Ap: What? Why ? You want her to be here?

Laksh (tease) : Yeah bhai, why do you want Swara to stay here?

Sanskar understand his teasing but ignore and answer.

Sanskar: Yeah, I want her to be here so that she can take rest as she couldn't sleep at night properly. She was taking care of me as I got fever. So,.

Ap: Oh yes, I should have understand it.  It's ok Swara beta. You sleep for sometime.

Swara nods no and said that she is fine but ap didn't listen anything and told her to take rest. Ap and Laksh left.

Swara could not deny more so she agreed and slept for sometime. Sanskar smiles looking at her sleeping and lost in her.

Sanskar (monologue): I don't know what are you Swara. I just can't understand you. How can be someone so selfless and caring? The more I tried to know You, the more I get surprised. I m so happy that someone like you is in my life who can handle me. You understand me Swara. Kavita did so wrong to you and I blamed you but you forgave me and Kavita and even told me to forget whatever she did. You are such a wonderful person I have ever seen in my life. I don't know what's in you that I can't control myself to think about you, to look at you. Yoou are so special Swara. I don't know why but I don't want to loose you. A person like you. A friend like you.

After couple of hours Swara got up and gets fresh n up and helped Sanskar.

10 days later,

It was ten days since Sanskar was discharged. He was fine now. His bandages, from the hand and forhead were removed. He was just having small bandage on his forhead. In all these days, Swara took great care of Sanskar. Sanskar was also more dependent on her for medicines and his things. His trust on her increased. They got more closer. The bond between them got stronger. Sanskar was getting more confused about his attraction toward Swara and on the other side, Sanskar's closeness affect Swara so much. Swara was really having tough times to control her racing heartbeat and heavier breathe.

On seventh day, Sanskar demanded to go to office but Swara strictly denied it and ap also supported Swara. Swara even told Laksh to not to bring any files and documents to get his sign even as Sanskar was trying to do office work sitting in room only. Finally it was tenth day and AP allowed Sanskar to go to office but he had to come back home early and he will not take stress. Sanskar promised to do that and AP allowed him.

Everyone were downstairs. It was morning. They were having breakfast together. DP nd Rp left to office after breakfast. Laksh also left. Sanskar was about to go but remembered about some file.

Sanskar: Oh shit, I forgot my file.

He was going to room when Swara stopped him and told him that he is not gonna find it as She had kept everything in cupboard. She will go and bring it for him to which Sanskar agreed.

Swara went to their room. She opened the cupboard and she was taking out the file when something fell from the file. Swara got confused to see it. It was looking something small wrapped with small piece of paper. She bend and lift it. She kept the file on table and remove the cover paper from that small thing only to find a memory card. She got confused to see it as why it is kept here with this file? But then she remembered this was the same file which was with Sanskar, a night before accident and his talk about the presentation that he couldn't open because it was password protected. She look at card carefully and get shocked to realized something. The very next day, Sanskar met with accident. What if it was the same memory card.

Swara (monologue): No, no.. this can't be happened. I couldn't do that. Because of me, Sanskar came to Know the truth.

A tear escaped from her eyes. She remembered how Sanskar told her about the file and she helped him. Now, she understood why the password was "Sanskar" as it was her card which was having Kavita's confession. In all these days, she was close to him but he never told her how he came to know about Kavita. But now she knew that. It was all because of her one stupidity due to which Sanskar came to know the truth. She herself open the password lock. She remembered how Sanskar's accident happened. His condition, She was about to loose him because of her stupidity. A guilt surrounded her heart thinking she was responsible for Sanskar's accident.

Sanskar was waiting for Swara but she was not coming. So, he thought to check by himself. He went to his room and sees Swara standing near cupboard taking something in her hand. She was bowing her head down. So, he couldn't understand anything. He got confused and walked to her calling her name.

Sanskar( coming close to her): Swara..

Swara saw him with tears in her eyes. Sanskar got shocked to see her crying. Heift his hand toward her to cup her face but she immediately backed out.

Sanskar (confused): Swara? What happened? Why are you crying?

Swara just looked at the memory in her hand. Sanskar also sees it and get shocked to find the memory card. He remembered how he put it in the file but he never thought that Swara will get it. He got that she must come to know everything and she must be blaming herself.

Sanskar: Swara listen..

Swara move back and point toward herself: (sign) It was me.. It was me because of whom you came to know everything. It was me, just because of me, you met with accident. You were about to die. Your life was in danger because of me. How can I do that? How can be I so foolish?

Sanskar: Swara, Swara listen to me. Don't blame yourself. You didn't do anything.

But Swara was not ready to listen anything. Her mind was roaming around the incidents. Because of her, her Love's life was in danger. She moves back whenever Sanskar tried to go close to her to make her understand.

Sanskar: Swara, understand it please.

Again Swara move back. Sanskar was having enough of it. So, he swiftly move towards her and hold her.

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