Childhood kisses

"I can't even look at you without wanting to kiss you"

1922
• Finn •

I was sat at the table in the kitchen, I'd been helping out in the betting den all day waiting for Nala to get home from school and I was fucking bored
Arthur sat beside me as Pol drank her tea, John rambling a story in her ear about Esme and the kids
Yet no one bothered to really listen.

The door suddenly swung open and Nala stormed in with a scowl on her face, trudging into the kitchen and grabbing my hand, pulling me up from the table and dragging me upstairs.

I was confused as she tugged me up the stairs, hearing John and Arthur shouting after us
"Yeah hello to you too" Arthur scoffed
"Bye then Finn" I heard John laugh.

Nala pulled me into her room, pushing me to sit on the bed, following after me
"Kiss me" she blurted out, cheeks red and chest heaving
My eyes widened as I shifted a bit of distance away from her
"What?!" I practically shouted, swallowing harshly.

She looked quite frantic
"I need you to kiss me" she said, looking at me with hopeful eyes as she moved closer to me
"Why?" I asked, stunned as to why she wanted to kiss me
I mean... I'd daydreamed of kissing her ever since we were 12 but why would she want to kiss me?
I realised I couldn't move any further as my back hit the headboard.

"'Cause all the girls at school were talking about boys and how many they've kissed and stuff and they think it's weird I haven't ever kissed a boy" she rambled on
"And we're 14 now... don't you think it's weird?" She asked, momentarily stopping her freak out and looking at me, her gorgeous blue eyes staring into mine and she had her arms either side of me, leaning into me.

"Um- a b-bit" I replied, I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks as she stared at me
"Oh come on Finn please... just once... just so I have actually kissed someone ya know?... it's not like it'll be your first kiss" she argued, her eyes pleading

What was she talking about? It would be my first kiss, granted I wanted it to be with her but I don't think I could ever admit that to her.

"Um..." I didn't know what to say
"It- it would be my first kiss" I stuttered
Her big blue eyes widened at me
"But you..." her eyebrows furrowed
"How can you not have kissed a girl?... you're you" she pointed out, I was confused, what does she mean I'm me?

She seemed to think for a moment and then spoke again
"Would you mind if it was me?" She asked softly, fingers fumbling the sheets in her hands
I shook my head furiously, I didn't trust myself to speak.

Her face seemed to light up again and she moved closer to me, chests touching as her tongue crept out across her bottom lip
"So... you'd kiss me?" She asked softly, looking at my lips
I froze for a moment and then slowly nodded.

She didn't say anything else, just moved even closer, her lips hovering over mine
"And it won't ruin anything?... we'll still be best friends?" She asked barely above a whisper, I could feel her warm breath on my face
I couldn't nod again, any movement and her lips would be on mine.

"Yes" I breathed out, barely breathing as I waited for her to kiss me
She closed her eyes and moved forward, I closed my eyes too... bracing myself
Within a second I felt her soft lips on mine, we stayed like that for a minute, before she began moving her lips against mine hesitantly and I tried to copy her.

Her lips felt like everything good in the world, she slowly moved her hands up to softly grab my face, pulling me closer to her, I didn't know what to do with my hands so I lightly held her lower back, but then she moved my hands to her waist, grabbing my face again afterwards.

She was the first to pull away, keeping her eyes closed for a few seconds and still holding my face
Then her eyes opened, and I swear I could have died right then and there, she was so fucking beautiful, looking up at me like that, lips slightly swollen from the kiss and cheeks flushed red.

No words were spoken for a while, her hands eventually dropped and she moved back a bit, looking down at her hands and playing with her rings
"Uh- thank you" she said just above a whisper, so quiet I'm surprised I heard it.

I just nodded again, still not trusting my voice
The silence was deafening, she was my best friend and I just kissed her.

"Dinner!" The shouting voice of aunt Pol pulled both of us back to reality and we stood up at the same time
I went to leave but she softly gripped my forearm, pulling me back to her and embracing me in a hug
"Are we okay?" She asked after a moment, I hugged her tighter and spoke into her ear
"Always" I said, she pulled away and smiled, before making her way downstairs, leaving me standing there.

I didn't want any other girl anyway, I'd only ever wanted her... but after that kiss, I knew for sure she would be the only girl I would ever love.

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