Confronting

"Once you feel avoided by someone, never disturb them again"

• Nala •

4 days, I've avoided Finn for 4 days now
Every time he entered the room, I left, every time I saw him on the street, I all but ran away
I'd been staying with Lola since that day.

And whilst Daisy was doing a great job at nagging me to confront Finn, I just couldn't
I felt too awkward
And each day I ignored him and avoided him only made the situation worse.

Polly was adamant to find out why I wasn't staying at home. She knew something had happened between me and Finn
Everyone could see it. We were normally joined at the hip and now we couldn't even look each other in the eyes.

"Come and help me with this will ya?" Pol asked, disappearing into her office as she read over something
I sighed, getting up and following after her.

• Nala's Outfit •

• Finn •

"All I'm saying is she had cracking tits alright?" John said as we walked into the betting den
"And all I'm saying, is you're married Johnny boy" Arthur replied, I rolled my eyes, like that's ever stopped him before
"You want to run off and fuck one of God's followers, be our guest, but don't shove it down our throats" John threw back.

"Fuck off" Arthur grumbled back, sitting down at Esme's empty desk.
I sat down on the end of the table, my eyes immediately seeking our Nala, but she wasn't at her desk.

John groaned
"You two still fighting?" He asked, nodding to her absent seat
I said nothing, just stared ahead
"You know if you tell us, we could help you" Arthur said.

I rolled my eyes
"I doubt it" I muttered.
"Oh come on... just tell us, we can give you advice" John argued
"The only thing you could give is fatherly advice... and even that's at a stretch" I said.

John was probably the worst at giving relationship advice, he had god knows how many kids now. And he wasn't exactly the father of the year
"Is there a specific reason you're sitting around doing nothing?" I heard Tommy ask behind me, before he sat in the middle of all of us at the table.

"We're trying to help Finn with Nala but he won't let us" John frowned at me
"I don't need your help" I snapped
"Finn" Tommy said simply, I looked over at him, and he clearly wasn't in the mood to wait around.

But I didn't want to tell them
They'd just laugh and take the piss out of me.
"We don't have all day Finn" Arthur pointed out
I sighed
"We just... she saw something..." I shrugged, looking down
"What?" John smirked.

"Nothing" I said immediately
"Finn" Tommy said again
I groaned
"She... I- I was in the bath..." I trailed off
And John started laughing.

"So what?... she saw your cock?" He asked laughing
"No... well maybe but... I- I was..." I'm sure my face was completely red now, I couldn't say it
"Hey" I heard Isaiah's voice before I saw him.

Oh fuck.

"You got any idea what the fuck he's on about?" Arthur asked, pointing at me lazily
Isaiah took one look at my face and started smirking
He definitely knew what was wrong, I hadn't stopped going on about it in days.

I missed her. Sue me

"This about Nala?" He asked, John nodded
"Apparently she 'saw something'" John said, faking fascination
Isaiah started laughing. A lot.
"Oh she saw something... she saw Finn knocking one out to the thought of her" he laughed.

All their faces dropped, before John and Arthur burst out laughing
"She caught you wanking?" John laughed loudly
"And moaning her name" Isaiah added.

I sighed, dropping my head into my hands as they laughed at me
"This is why I didn't want to tell you" I grumbled
"No wonder she's avoiding you" Arthur chuckled.

I took a glance up at Tommy, he was smirking,  clearly finding it funny but not out right laughing at me
"Finn... come here" he said simply, standing up and buttoning his jacket
I stood up, following him to Polly's office.

What did he want? I know he took charge of the family, but I don't want to sit and have an awkward talk about... that stuff
He put his hand on my shoulder, making me walk in front of him as he opened the office door, I walked in first and my eyes immediately caught her.

She was sat opposite Pol
Fuck.

"Polly, can I have a word?" Tommy asked, Polly nodded, standing from her desk and trailing over to the door, I turned around to leave too but Tommy pushed me back gently
"No Finn, you stay here" he said, shutting the door behind him before I could say a word.

And I saw Nala stiffen at the mention of my name.

Then I heard the lock turn. No. No no no
I tried the handle but it wouldn't open, I was trapped in here.
Fuck fuck fuck... I couldn't bring myself to turn around.

But I knew she was there

"Finn" I heard her soft voice.
I turned around slowly, looking over at her
I really missed her. I just wanted everything to go back to normal.

"Hey" I said quietly, just stood there.

• Nala •

I missed him. So much
And just looking at him now. I wanted him to call me darling and kiss my forehead
For us to be okay
"Hey" he said awkwardly
Fuck. Why did Polly have to lock the door?

He just stood there, staring at the floor for ages
I couldn't take it. The silence was killing me.
"Finn?" I asked, he looked up at me immediately
"Can you sit down?" I sighed, he shuffled over, sitting next to me.

He jittered his leg, still looking at the floor, his hand tapping against the table in between us
So I placed my hand over his to make it stop
"Can we- can we talk?" I asked, we needed to sort this
And we couldn't just keep ignoring each other.

"About what?" He mumbled
"Finn" I said pointedly
He sighed
"Do we have to?" He asked, and I watched as his cheeks dusted a deep red
"Would you rather we just keep avoiding each other? That I keep staying at Lola's?" I asked.

He was quiet for a moment, before he shook his head, muttering a small 'no'
"Okay... so..." I didn't know what to say, what do you say when you walk in on your best friend... doing stuff?

"I'm sorry alright, I- I didn't know you were there" He stuttered out, I let out a little chuckle
"Clearly" I smiled, he laughed softly, still staring at the floor
Why wouldn't he look at me?
"Finn- W-why did you say my name?" I asked.

"What?" He asked
"I mean I get that boys... you know, but why did you say my name?" I asked, he kept his head down, shrugging
"Can we just... forget about it?" He asked awkwardly, he wasn't going to tell me
I frowned.

So he doesn't like me... it was just a sexual thing. If that.
I don't know because he won't talk about it
"Okay..." I said quietly, he sighed
"Look, you're my best friend, I just... I don't want to lose you and I know if we talk about... what you saw then it'll be even more weird" he explained.

I nodded slowly
"I get it" I said sadly, he just wanted to go back to how we were
And if I was being honest with myself, so did I.
I missed seeing him everyday.
And I missed home.

Even if I couldn't have him the way I craved, I'd take friendship over nothing at all any day

It was silent again for a while, before he actually looked at me for the first time.
"You wanna... go to the canal or something?" He asked, I nodded
"Sure" I said, standing up
Finn stood too, rushing over to the door and banging against it.

"Polly! Let us out!" Finn called
"Have you talked?" Polly asked sternly
"Yes we're fine, open the door!" He shouted back, I heard the lock go as I put my coat on, and the door swung open.

"You're friends again?" She asked, crossing her arms
I nodded, looking down so I didn't have to look at him. Or Pol.
Woman could read me like a book...
It was still awkward though, and I wanted to know why he said my name.

"Good" she nodded
"Get out then, you've held me up long enough with this shit" she muttered, ushering us out of her office
Outside, John, Arthur, Tommy and Isaiah sat.

All of them smiling or smirking at us
"What?" I asked
"You kissed and made up?" Arthur asked, smirking
"Yes" Finn gritted out, anyone could see he really didn't want to be here.

"Good... that's good" Tommy drawled out, leant back in his chair casually
"We're um, we're gonna go down the canal" I said quickly, grabbing Finn's hand and heading for the door
The contact alone sent shivers up my arm.

I really had missed him.

"Ah" John called out amused
"'Down the canal'... gotcha" he chuckled, making me blush embarrassed
Why couldn't they just leave us alone?
A girl and a boy could be friends without there being any... feelings.

Okay sure I was head over heels in love with him but that isn't the point
They didn't know that... right?
Was it obvious?
Could everyone see? The thought made me drop my grip on Finn's hand.

I didn't want him finding out. Call me a coward but I was too scared to do anything. To say anything
Because I know he'll only push me back. I was his best friend. That's all. I'd never be anything more to him.
Otherwise he'd say something... or at least give me some kind of sign... wouldn't he?

"Fuck off John" Finn replied, annoyed
"Oi, watch your mouth" he scolded him, only making Finn roll his eyes
"Come on" he grumbled, taking my hand back in his, entwining our fingers, just like we always did... ever since we were kids.

He led me out the betting den and started striding down to the canal, I had to jog just to keep up with him as he tugged me along.
"Finn... Finn slow down" I said, coming up by his side as we made our way down the bank towards the water.

It was a hot day, but the water still looked freezing.
He sat down on the edge, pulling me down with him, our feet dangling over the edge, a short distance above the water.

We sat there for a while, in complete silence as we stared out at the summer water.
"I missed you" I mumbled quietly
I saw him look at me out the corner of my eye, but I kept my gaze on the water.

Then... I felt his lips against my cheek, in a short but sweet kiss
"I missed you too" he whispered, and I couldn't help but smile, turning to look at him, his face mere inches from mine.

"Nala... I-"
"Nala?" I heard a voice behind us, cutting Finn off
I looked behind me, and I saw the one person I never wished to ever lay eyes on again
Tom... Tom fucking Campbell

Tom was the only boyfriend I had ever had, he was two years older than us and I hadn't seen him in nearly 2 years
I thought I loved him... in that stupid 'first love'  kinda way
Who could blame me? I was 15 and naive.

And when I caught him kissing another girl... my naive self cried over him. I actually cried over this... idiot
Tom wasn't anything special, he was better off than most of us around here, and I learnt a few years back his uncle was an inspector.

A high and mighty policeman that fucked with Tommy for a while.
"Tom..." I didn't know what to say to him, he looked older.
Whereas Finn just stiffened up beside me.

"Hey, been a while" he smiled, that pretty boy smile that would make most girls swoon, standing with his hands in his pockets casually
"Yeah, what are you doing down here?" I asked, looking him up and down
He was in a suit... of course he was in a fucking suit, I heard he was an accountant now at his dads company.

"Just... just taking a walk" he said casually, but the way he rubbed the back of his neck made me think otherwise
"Right" I drawled out
"Finn" Tom acknowledged, Finn merely looked at him, before turning his attention back to me
"You two are still... hanging around together" Tom pointed out.

"Of course we are, we're best friends" I said
"Friends... so you're not... taken?" he asked
"I don't think that's any of your business anymore" Finn said, and then I felt his hand close over mine
I tried not to read into it
I know he was just trying to protect me, I'd had a fair few nights crying on his shoulder after the breakup.

But his hand... his touch. It was gentle, and... just Finn. My Finn
"Quite, nonetheless, I still want to know" he said
"I- um..." I didn't know how to respond
"Yeah, she is taken, she's mine, you can be best friends with your girlfriend ya know" Finn said abruptly, looking at me to play along.

I nodded slowly, smiling
"Yeah, uh- sorry Tom" I said
"Nothing to be sorry for, just asking" he smiled, I nodded, but I didn't believe it.
"Well... maybe we can go for a drink sometime yeah, catch up?" He suggested.

"Um... I don't thin-"
"She's not going anywhere with you" Finn snapped
Tom chuckled
"You're her boyfriend, not her keeper" he laughed, Finn stood up
"She's mine. Which means she's not going near you" Finn said calmly, squaring up to him.

"Finn" I said, standing up too
"She can go where she wants" Tom smiled
Finn didn't say anything, he just looked pissed
"She can get in whoever's bed she wants" he whispered.

And that's when Finn punched him. Hard
And Tom staggered back, looking back up with blood trailing from his nose
"Finn" I said shocked, he grabbed my wrist, pulling me along behind him again as he stormed off.

•

"Finn... Finn... Finn!" I said louder and louder
"What?" He said, breathing heavily as he abruptly turned around, stopping us in our tracks on the street
"I- what was that?" I asked confused
"He's just such a dick, he can't just talk about you like that Nal" he said annoyed.

"I know... but you didn't have to hit him" I muttered, lowering my head
I heard him sigh, before I felt his arms wrap around me
"I'm not sorry" he mumbled, chin leaning on the top of my head thanks to his height.

I looked up
"Why did you pretend to be my boyfriend?" I asked
"So he'd leave you alone" he said
"Yeah but now every time we see him we'll have to pretend to be a couple" I chuckled, he shrugged
"So?" He asked.

'So?'
Why are boys so goddam confusing?
What on earth does 'so?' mean?

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