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I looked where she pointed. There was a small crowd of fans with their phones out, facing the girls who were selling the merch and I.

They were probably taking pictures, and if I didn't use my cap to hide my face, they'd get it on camera. And probably Twitter.

They weren't doing anything except inspecting me. I didn't like it, but it was something I was used to. Reminding myself I had no reason to panic, I took a glance at the HXSTS merch, and then back to the fans.

I needed to leave before it did become a problem.

I bit my lip as I took a step back from the two girls. I bowed to them, muttering a 'thank you' and 'gracias' before starting at a fast pace in the opposite direction from those with their cameras up. I begged that no one would follow me.

Suho had told me this would happen. Did I listen? Nope, not really. Was I going to regret this quickly? Yep. But did I yet? No. Not as long as I kept moving.

I held the Daehyun package tightly in my hands as I passed the merch lines, the random dance plays, and the fans waiting for entrance to the venue.

I reached the gate where fans weren't allowed, and that was when I realized my mistake.

I couldn't get back in without the pass.

I'd have to see what I could do.

I approached the security guard, but I wasn't at the same entrance as we came in from.

After a deep breath, Iprepared my not-so-prepared social skills. He wasn't a BigHit staff member, so one: I knew he wouldn't know who I was, and two: I didn't think he spoke Korean. So I had to try English again.

"Hi, I'm Kim Sujin. Backstage... I need to go, my brothers- they are BTS. I came here, them- with them."

He looked at me a moment before shaking his head. "I'm sorry, I don't know a Kim Sujin, I don't have any clearance for allowing them to pass."

Of course. Venue security knew nothing about the idols themselves.

"You know BTS?" I asked, reciting the English phrase I'd heard my brothers use before.

"BTS? The boy band, they're performing tonight."

"Yes! I am sister. Backstage? I need to go backstage."

"Again, I can't be sure you're telling the truth, and I have no clearance to let you through."

I pursed my lips. Would I really have to go to my brothers for help? Going back to find the staff I'd come out with would be dangerous, especially since I knew fans were starting to be aware of me around here. I hoped with all my might my brothers wouldn't be mad if I called them.

"Ok, let me... minute. I will call them."

I stepped back, pulling out my phone as the guard eyed me suspiciously. I didn't blame him for not believing my story. I chose who I thought would be safest, but for some reason, Yoongi picked up from Hoseok's phone.

"Yeah, I'm not even surprised you need something. What is it?"

"Yoongi? Ahhh, you see, well, I lost the staff I came with and-"

"I know that, oh, believe me, I know. He's sitting right here in front of me. Care to explain why? Or is there something wrong I need to help you with first?" I heard the screech of microphones malfunctioning in the background. They'd started rehearsal.

"Yooongi," I cried softly, feeling bad, "please help me, I need to get back into the venue. The staff had the pass and the security guard won't let me through."

I heard a sigh from his end. "That's why I let your uncle know and now he's out there trying to find you."

Agh. That disappointed me. Now I'd made them put in a search effort.

"Can you tell him I'm at the left entrance? The one that doesn't take fan admission?"

"Why don't you tell him yourself? The rest are waiting on me to help Hoseok with his wardrobe, and we're supposed to be rehearsing right now."

"I'm sorry Yoongi, do that. I'll let my uncle know. Just know there's fans on my trail and I kinda need help-"

"I know there's fans on your trail, I was alerted by another staff that videos of you are reaching the media! So for goodness sake, I'll send more stuff out to find you. I'd talk to you about it when you get back but I'll be rehearsing, so anyways. I'll talk to you later. Get back safe and quick, please."

"I will, I'm sorry Yoongles. Thank you for the help."

"Someone will meet you at the gates with a pass. You better be in the seats watching us rehearse in fifteen minutes or I'll stop rehearsal to find you myself."

I knew he couldn't do that. The last thing all of us needed was one of the seven idols to show themselves infront of the lines of fans waiting who were waiting for their concert.

The security guard sighed when I slid my phone back into my pocket. "Look, am I going to need to escort you out or something?"

"No, no, Sejin is man-a-ger, BTS mana-ger. He is my uncle. He come-"

I don't think I'd ever been more relieved to see, from the crowd, and unmistakable face towering way above the rest. My uncle's height was something quite unique compared to the flock of mostly teenagers in lines. He waved his pass up in the air, assuring me the security guard would understand in the next minute and I'd be saved.

As I sat in the front row of the folded seats set up in the arena, my phone buzzed once again from my pocket. Two notifications.

The first was a BigHit email.

Swipe.

The second I half expected to be Suho, considering I hadn't called him back yet, but was surprised to find it was Dae. I hit answer and held the phone up to my ear.

"Kid, put your phone down, I've gotta ask you something while they fix my mic-" Namjoon said out of breath as he hopped down from the stage.

"One second, Daehyun just called me...." I placed my finger over the mic so the boy on the other side of the line couldn't hear my conversation.

"That's not going to take one second. You left the staff?"

"No, he lost me-"

"He did not lose you," his voice softened, "that's not what he said."

"He sure lost my mind," I sighed, ending the call from my friend. I'd have to call back after. "All he did was tell me what to do and to follow him. I wanted to explore a few things while he was doing his little job that was taking forever. And, he left me to go film. That's when I got bored. Plus," I took a breath and then added, "Suho called me and told me to leave quickly because someone took a picture of me."

My brother nodded. "I understand that, kid, but then you kept going, didn't you?"

"Yeah," I shrugged, "I figured I'd lost the people who might have taken a picture since they didn't seem to care about me all that much."

Joon took the seat next to me and then wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Sorry, I'm sweaty-"

I laughed, "I don't care, Joonie."

"Anyways," he shook his head, "look, I know there's that struggle between knowing the fans care about you or dismissing the idea completely."

"Yeah, who knows if they even care about catching me on camera to share because I'm your sister or because I'm Sujin?"

He thought for a moment. "You remember how many people listen to your music?"

"The silly things I post on YouTube? Joon, you can't count those. I'm just the sister of BTS, and they want to know if I'm going to provide them music like yours."

"I can't deny some of them think like that," he chewed the bottom of his lip, "but you know there's going to be people who genuinely like it, and they'll stay. They'll be there for you later when you need it. You just need to keep going, see how many people are still there later. Maybe it just takes patience."

"You sound like you've experienced this yourself."

"Yeah, I have. I think you forget that we at one point were a new hip-hop boy band from BigHit Entertainment, and there's no doubt we lost fans once we weren't the shiny new group anymore. But guess how many real ones we gained over time?" He turned around, facing the empty arena. "Count those seats, and it'd only be a fraction of the real ones."

I couldn't help but smile. "You're right. I'll be patient."

"That's the spirit," he smiled back, "but in the meantime, you need to be sure you're making smart decisions so you can get to that point without a scandal."

"Without another scandal," I reminded him, thinking about the one I had with Jimin just the other year... and maybe a few others along the way to tour.

"Just another reason to be careful." He tapped my head. "Learn from your mistakes and you'll be golden." He was quiet for a moment, and I couldn't think of anything else to say. "So tell me what you did after you left the staff I told you to stay with and ended with some videos and an angry Yoongi?"

"Ugh," I sighed, "Well it was real nice to just be a fan. Until I wasn't."

My brother laughed. "Tell me about it."

"Well, I got to see the little area where fans had displays for trading merch and handmade stuff. It was really cool and fun to watch, and then..." I stopped. I'd been so intrigued, I somewhat forgot the total details of what I saw. "Some HXSTS fans were trading HXSTS merch."

He went quiet for a moment. "Ah, that's what caught your attention."

"Yeah," I nodded and my voice softened, "and they had some for Jiho."

"Oh," Namjoon said, turning to me. "I... I'm not sure what to say. What did you think?"

"It just kinda surprised me, that's all. I hadn't seen him included in something for the band for a while. I'm still not sure whether I like it better that way or not."

"I'm not telling you how to feel, but remember what you decided on?"

With a nod, I recited, "respect and forget."

"Right. Take it a step at a time and see what comes of it. If it's not something to dwell on, you'll know."

"It isn't. I won't."

"Alright, kid-"

The director approached Namjoon with his mic, telling him it should have been fixed, as Yoongi started some test runs from the stage. "Solo stages after solo stage break set, 'Save Me' and 'I Need U' to proceed."

"I've gotta get ready for that. Lesson learned, stay with the staff for now on, alright?"

"Yeah, I get it Joon."

After Namjoon hopped back up onto the stage to continue, my phone buzzed again. It reminded me that Daehyun had just tried to call, so I redialed his number. He picked up immediately.

"Hey Sujin, you'll never guess what Suho just showed me." The way he said it so cheerily was mildly frightening. He sounded almost a little too giddy with whatever Suho had shown him.

"Is he there? He asked me to call him back once I was with my brothers-"

"Yeah he knows you're with them," was Dae's simple answer, "but back to what I heard. Did the Kim Sujin call little 'ol me... cute?"

I groaned and hid my face in my hands, ignoring the blush that was creeping up onto my cheeks. "You saw that?"

"Your English was just adorable too!" I could practically see the teasing grin on his face. "'Ah, yes, he's really cute'."

Him repeating what I said with perfect pronunciation really set in the fact that I did indeed call him cute- in a language that was not my own.

"Dae!" I pouted as he giggled across the line.

"That moment is immortalized in my mind. You'll never escape that video. One day when we're both famous I'm going to pull out my phone and play it on some big show so the whole world will see how good looking you think I am, just you wait."

"Taking one out of Suho's book?"

"Do you know it wasn't my book to begin with?" I could hear Suho cackling in the background speaking loudly about something that was drown in his laughter.

"No." I said, horrified.

"Yes."

"My world will never be the same,"

"Only as it has to be from this point on. Saying that I was cute in a language I can speak," Suho shouted in the background again, "You've inflated his ego!"

"Well luckily I don't live with him, and am currently out of the country,"

"Are you- are you saying that you don't think I'm cute?"

I went silent. "Er, I didn't say that."

"Suho, she thinks I'm not cute!" I could hear faintly from him, "Well what am I meant to do about it?"

After a quick facepalm, I asked, "Okay, so which is better? What do you want me to say? Does it count for me to say I go with whatever you like best as long as you keep in mind that doesn't reflect on my character?"

"Yeah I guess, I've got a boyfriend to call me cute so it doesn't matter but I'm still going to bring this up later just you wait."

Hope you're all staying safe, healthy, and happy!

See you next week,

Rose