"There are stages of zodiac signs? I never knew that. Mom, whether you are in room 109 or 209 at the hospital, just know that your wonderful son is thinking about you. Anyways..." he trailed off for a few seconds, then continued.

"Well, technically, my mom's a Scorpio, but she kind of reads of Sagittarius because she's really good with conversations and scolding people. I'm a Cancer, Mr. Robins." Lysander said.

Did he actually thinking we were conversing about zodiac signs? Apparently so.

"Ryan, this is not a joke." My dad said seriously. But he actually looked like he was going to burst out laughing at any moment.

Lysander sighed. "Stage four? How many hundred stages are again? She's like, gonna live, right?"

Now it was my turn to sigh. "There are only four stages."

"WELL WHY DIDN'T NO ONE TELL ME?" He asked.

"Well, you never asked." My dad said, "And didn't I just tell you that your mom was at stage four?"

"If you didn't know, erm, Ryan, stage four is, like, the stage where you're about to.." I cough, "fly up to heaven." Yeah, yeah. That's what it is.

Lysander gasped. "Is it for free?"

Bruh. Seriously?

My dad coughed, like he was trying to teach a little kid something without lying or scaring them. Yes, Lysander is literally a kid.

"Getting cancer or, uh, flying up to, uh, heaven?" I asked for my dad. Yeah, dad, you can thank me by a Cheeze-it company. What? I need a way to bribe Lysander the moronic monkey. I'm finally improving my nicknames. Yay me.

"W-w-well, both are free, Ryan." My dad stammered. "Me and Julia need... a moment."

"So you're just going to casually stroll in, tell me my mom has cn

Before my dad dragged me out of the room, I called, "Hey, L-Ryan, flying up to heaven also means dying."

My dad dragged me out into the hallway. "Not helping, Julia, not helping."

I heard a chuckle from the room.

"I swear, the guy has super hearing!" My dad said.

"Why thank you, maybe I do!" Lysander called from the room.

He's haunting me. Scarier than any ghost, ready to scare me at any mo-

Yeah, I think I'm scaring myself more than Lysander is. I'm not helping myself much.

My dad dragged me all the way to the kitchen. "Maybe he won't be able to hear us here."

"I CAN HEAR YOU!" Lysander called from the room. It was like, ten feet away.

"You know what? Let's go into the basement."

No more 'I can hear you's were said.

"What? The basement? No no no no-"

"He won't be able to hear us down there!

"Hehe... dad, my room is right on top of the basement." I told him.

He stopped walking. "You're right. We can talk in the garage."

I don't think he's aware of the fact we're talking right now.

"Well, the garage is next door to my room." I argued.

"Oh! I forgot. I seem to be forgetting a lot these days..." My dad muttered.

That I can agree on.

"Then where can we talk?" He asked.

"Three things to break to you, dear ol' dad. For one, it's your house. So how the heck am I supposed to know? For two, maybe we can just skip this talk. And for three, I'm sure he can hear us better when we're far away from him. You know, echolocation?" I informed him.

I forgot to tell you: my dad never made it to college, and he's not full-blood American or anything, so I'm sure he doesn't know what echolocation is.

He gasped. "I don't know what that means, but it sounds scary. I guess we'll just talk here."

Dang it.

"Is your friend...okay? I mean, he's a little...unique, that's all."

"He's fine! He just wants to give everyone the impression of him being the stupid idiot he's trying to be. But his twin brother, Lysander, the 'guy that belongs in jail' is actually a lot better than him." I told my dad. What? Lysander can't keep on being Ryan forever. He's going to blow his cover soon!

I, Julia Robins, shall bet five bags of holy Cheeze-its that thee stupendous Lysander shall, very soon, blow his cover.

There, I said it.

"Nice try, kiddo, but it's not happening. Oh, wait." He stops talking and pauses for a minute.

There is something with our family and saying "Oh,wait!" and then just completely not saying anything after. It's so weird. Maybe we're secretly wizards or we can tell the future or something. Maybe I have the same disease Bob and Sid have.

"Maybe we should ban you from hanging out with Ryan, too. And I would like to meet this... Lysander friend of yours." My dad chuckled evilly.

No, no, no. This wasn't supposed to happen. I will not lose my five bags of Cheeze-its. Never.

"Oh, he's busy right now. You know, after jail and stuff." I told him, "BUT he's like, totally innocent, so don't run up to him and handcuff him or anything. And please don't be ridiculous. You're scaring all of my friends away. Do you seriously not want me to have friends that bad?"

"Hey, I really don't like kids. They're here to replace us grownups. I'm just trying to be the overprotective father I couldn't be. I mean, it's not my fault that my daughter isn't attractive enough to get a boyfriend! It's also not my fault that even if you did have a boyfriend, you'd scare them off before I even get to meet him." My dad said.

Says the one who literally is scaring the crap out of Lysander right now.

Yes, that's right. That's how awesome my parents are. Trust me, my mom's even better. At least it's not my brother here. He'd embarrass me more than my parents combined. Ugh, why did he have to be so cute to get all the info out of me? Sigh.

Don't listen to my dad. He's so scary to E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E that I'm sure everyone a ten feet radius away from him would just fall on their knees and beg for mercy.

"It's weird how Lysander and Ryan happen to be identical twins..." my dad said.

"Yeah... it is...."

"And even though you're not as attractive or young looking like me, old woman, you're still my favorite daughter. Oh, I gotta go for a minute. Hold on." My dad just left me there, standing there.

For one, my dad looked older than my grandpa's great-great grandmother's uncle's dad.

For two, I'm his only daughter. He just sucks at making people feel better. Well, it kinda just runs in the family.

And for three, it's been more than a minute.

The phone rang, and I picked it up.

Caller ID: None Of Your Business.

I wonder who that is.

I picked it up and greeted the person on the phone. "Hello?"

A lot of crackling was on the other end before someone said, "Oh, hey, it's me!"

"Who's 'me?'" I asked, confused.

"Nevermind. Tell Lysander to come to Bob's house. Right now. We have a really, really important thing to tell him."
__________
Now that, my friends, is the end of Chapter Fifteen.

I have a very important favor to ask you guys. Before I tell you, let me give you a hug. *hugs*

I shall forever love you if you help me.

I'm trying to enter this book for an award, and I need you guys to vote for my book. The book that gets the most votes wins, so on.

When you scroll, find my book title (We the Weirdos). Comment '❤️' beside it, and that's how you vote. You're allowed to vote twice if you'd like to.

Link: https://www.wattpad.com/1102499832?utm_source=ios&utm_medium=link&utm_content=share_reading&wp_page=reading_part_end&wp_uname=somerandomhuman88&wp_originator=e0cESAEK9NelKdS6wS9RIeFFlJMyBXjeCmcrjfR5XKAsXtCyxm3mhT4Kaeh9g5czvHIsR9wjWLx2aKu3AEepelVbSLOP81nC82Gs8sEUWUkJptG%2BAeHO6jTJY1R%2FaRYe

Thank you! Now moving on...

Who's your favorite character?

And question number two....

Who out there is in love with Lysander? Come on, I know you guys are out there. Comment if you are!

Who do you think is on the other line of the phone? What is the very important thing the person on the other line want to tell Lysander?

Somerandomhuman88's Tip Number Three:

Parenting Hack: When punishing your kids, don't take away their electronics. Just take their charger and watch the fear in their eyes as they use it less and less while the battery slowly dies.

But don't worry. I don't have anyone to try this one, so maybe I can test this out on my siblings, but I kinda have to take everyone's chargers because they could always ask for my parents'.

Thank you guys!

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Have a wonderful day and stay awesome!

And when school starts, I'll update a bunch at one time (on the weekends).

Somerandomhuman88