In my mind, I had only one thing, survive today without any drama.

But, like I said before, that is not the case with me; because Shaun stopped me and smiled at my defiance.

"I am going to be there with you from now on and you are going to act like this to your friend?"

"Shaun, hi..." and I turned again, went straight to my class. There was nowhere else to go. The gym was under preparation for the dance. What more should I do? Everyone was looking at him and then to me. The girls couldn't believe he stopped at the Emo sorry excuse of a human being.

As I got into the sanctuary to excuse myself from school public eyes, I was wrong. The class was unevenly filled with students. Damn! Even my class was decorated in pink puke. Every chair was decorated with a pink heart shape. I stripped mine and sat with my legs up on the table. Everyone looked at me with a glare since I stripped their hard work. Like I care!

Only one thing controlled me. What will happen when I turn eighteen?

The seat occupied next to me belonged to Ryder's, school basketball team captain and kickboxing champion. So, you get the picture; tall, rugged, handsome and a complete womanizer. So, yeah, he was the one who sat next to me. At least, the seat was reserved for him. Since he was never inside the classroom; always, running through the school for this and that, never attending classes but for every exam, he got an A. I, sometimes envy him. Whenever I bunk class, my father or uncle knows about it. In short, when the place got a butt, I curiously turned around to look if I was actually blessed to see Ryder's face next to me before the term ends. But, no such luck and I groaned in frustration.

Shaun occupied the seat and smiled at me cheekily.

"What is your problem?" I bellowed at him.

"What is your problem? I will never mind him following me." Britney, a student in my class exclaimed with her high pitched voice. Ugh!

"And that is why you never get a decent one. You are always floundering your ass." I snapped at her.

"You bit*h..." her piercing voice shook my brain, it seems. I rolled my eyes. Luckily, she backed off with just my stare. I am in no mood to hit a girl now. Shaun winked at her to which she melted. Fuc*ing brat!

"Lily, this is not going to work if you are not going to help me. I need to take care of you. You are my project. Did you forget what happened last night?" somehow when he said project he squirmed and tried to cover up what he just said. Project!? I can't believe it.

"Your project...? What did you just say?" I already angry at my fate that made me live a lie with too many secrets and cryptic messages. And now, with this project thing; I am done!

"Yes, Tom asked me to take care of you. And that is the reason why I am sitting right here with you, now." His voice was silky smooth but I didn't find it attractive like I did when I saw him for the first time. I guess my period was to blame then. I am not sure. I don't know what is happening to me and I don't fuc*ing know what is going to happen to me when I turn eighteen and I am so angry about it all.

"Shaun, you better take your sorry ass of an excuse from me now. I am sure you know what will happen when I turn eighteen. But, you are not telling me so there... is the door."

"Lilly, listen to me; if I could, I will but..."

I literally didn't have any energy left in me. I can't take the heat. I am really drawn out. What will happen to me when I turn eighteen is eating my brain, heart, and soul. When I turned to look out the window, Shaun took my hand in his and squeezed. I do not like touching acts and somehow this angered me so much that I punched him in the face. I think he didn't see it coming. He took my punch and released my hands instantly. But, didn't say anything; his scowl said it all.

I got up, walked briskly knocking on a few other students on my way.

Releasing the breath that I have been holding on, I walked calmly to the cafeteria praying so hard not to burst out crying. The pressure is eating me inside out. I grabbed a snickers bar and doughnut. With the snacks in my hand, I walked out to my bike, sat down, leaning on to him and munched angrily. The doughnut was a bit hard; this is not helping me. I really needed something to kick me senseless.

The pressure of having to live a lie like this just made me want to die. But, I have wondered so hard about suicide. That will do no good. I think! Because, what happen when I die? What is death? I have literally too many questions which I am sure not many will have an answer.

I revved up my lover boy and raced the road lines and street signs, cutting through vehicles and stopped in front of my only favorite café on town; The Mickey's café. They gave me the most awesome hot chocolate with ice cream and waffles. Just what I want!

Seeing me, the bald man behind the counter smiles and I nodded at him.

And now, is my absolute favorite hobby beginning. Watching people go by their own business. It's nice to watch the confused, busy people who walk here and there through the streets. I love to watch them for hours. However, mommy dearest will always cut short my hobby by another useless pompous party.

And that reminds me of the party tonight. I don't want to go and I won't. Sheesh!

A clink made me turn to my senses and my heart beamed at the feast in sight. The baldie; I don't know his name, brought me my waffles with extra chocolate and ice cream, hot chocolate with marshmallows and ice cream. But, he set down another plate and that contained a piece of peach pie.

"On the house"

"Why?"

"Looks like you need it, hun."

"Thank you. But, I can't eat it all."

"You will find it amazing."

"But..."

"I insist."

I couldn't say no to him. However, it looks like I will need it.

Sipping on the hot chocolate, I could feel my nerves instantly loosening up. Not even snickers bar could do that to me. I felt happy. In between sips, I turned to watch the milling crowd since it was lunch hour. The street was crowded and I loved it. Woman, teens, men, everyone rushed out, looked at their watch, looked at their phones, tabs anything and walked briskly. Some even said sorry for bumping into each other.

On the other side was a park with green grass and in front of it was a small lake inside the park. It was a beautiful park. So, many people crossed the road in hurry and hugged a waiting partner on the other end and a few even kissed each other. Come on; take a room if you want. Not in public. I smiled, though. It was a beautiful scene to see. People who loved each other hugging each other; without fearing what happens next, without living a lie. I sighed!

For the first time in my life, I genuinely felt sadness extremely. I golfed down half of the pie and instantly felt like hugging baldie. It was simply superb!

With a content smile, I turned around and something caught my eye which I believe was in my sight even before but I didn't mind it.

A guy, dressed in a posh black suit was walking up and down the street in an interval. At times, he was talking on the phone or looking at the tab. Now, I saw him looking inside to the shop and then turn around and crossed the road to the park. I have no idea why I picked him from the middle of so many black suited guys. He had something that instantly caught my attention. I followed him and he stopped and sat on a park bench facing the café. Now, that was totally weird. Also, with his sunglasses, I was not sure where he was looking.

I sipped on my chocolate, bit another large bite of my pie and looked at the man to find him nowhere. He's gone. I searched up and down the street and as far as I can search, but I couldn't find him. A bad feeling clenched my gut and I couldn't brush the feeling away. Something is wrong. Terribly! As my birthday is nearing, everything is getting strange. Evelyn's behavior, Stephen's message, Simon's advice which I am sure has a double meaning and Sam. Sam is the most I felt acting differently. He is more caring, but he hides it so much that I am able to see through the act. His eyes speak volume to me; at times, I feel him trying to share something with his eyes but being the brat I am, I never show I care. But, I do. I care a lot and that is my problem at times.

Just like baldie said, I needed that extra pie; the extra calories and sugar to rejuvenate me. I paid him and crossed the streets to the park. I sat down on a bench that faced the lake. Though it was manmade, it was beautiful, long and peaceful. A duck family swam by and the last baby plunked into the water headfirst. It was hilarious. Luckily, I counted this distraction as a blessing.

My phone vibrated. It was Tom.

I picked up the call.

"Where are you pumpkin?"

"Uncle, seriously stop calling me that, I am not a kid anymore."

"For me, you will always be a princess."

"Fine, fine"

"Where are you?"

"Can I not enjoy nature without worrying what will happen to me when I turn eighteen?"

"Sweetie, not this again... are you in the park across Mickey's?"

"Yes. But, I will hit the road soon."

"Ok, come home then. Don't you have a party to attend?"

"I am not feeling well uncle, please; give me a minute for myself. I have planned to sleep in my room. Allow me, please! If I die on my eighteenth birthday, grant me this as my last wish."

"Don't talk like that."

"Whatever."

I hung up the phone. No, seriously, I am wondering if I am going to be flat that day. Is that the fuss all about? Am I having some sort of medical history that I don't know? Did my father enter into any sort of damn deal with the demons to grant me life or something; God, my mind is churning up worst scenarios. I just want it to come and go. No, I don't want to turn eighteen. What if I run away? Unlike all my other attempts, I will try it again.

Yes.

I will try it again.

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sHits ABouT to FalL