CHAPTER 10

TIME flew really fast. Parang kahapon lang ang umpisa ng pasukan. Parang kahapon lang nang makilala ko 'yung tatlo. Parang kahapon lang nang umalis si Kiara.

Nakaka-miss din ang babaeng 'yon.

"Selenn! Tama na ang drama, bruhilda ka! Mag-s-start na ang ceremony!" Rinig kong sabi ni Arjelyn.

I sighed. Memories keep on flashing in my mind. Those fun memories…na kahit kailan ay hindi ko inaasahang mararanasan ko.

During my first to third year of high school, I only had Diancia and Kiara as my companions. Almost 4 years of friendship but I haven't introduced them to my parents. Given that my parents are always busy, same as Diancia. But the real reason is…I'm afraid. Natatakot ako na baka magalit si Daddy at gawan niya sila ng masama. I once had a friend, my Yaya, but when Daddy discovered that…he immediately fired her. 

He's too strict.

Natatakot din ako dahil hindi ako confident…maski sarili ko ay hindi ko magawang pagkatiwalaan. I'm doubting myself to the point that I keep secrets from my parents.

Masaya ako nang makilala ko ang mga magulang ni Kiara. They look so kind and genuine. I wanted to hang out with them more but things came unexpectedly.

Ngayong fourth year ako, I didn't expect that I'll meet nine amazing people. Wence, Tarius, Secret, Romeo, Tessia, Arjelyn, Kit…and Luther.

I felt her tapping my shoulder. "Are you okay?" Nag-aalalang aniya.

I looked at our reflection in the mirror then gave her a small smile. "Yes, I'm fine…" I think.

"Kabado ka?" She asked, I nodded. "Okay lang 'yan. That's normal."

I heaved a sigh. "I'm nervous and at the same time sad." I confessed. "Nalulungkot ako dahil hindi natin kasama si Kiara sa graduation natin." Mahinang saad ko.

"Cheer up, hindi pa naman tayo magkakahiwalay-hiwalay! May 2 years pa tayo dito." She murmured. "'Wag ka nang malungkot, baka maiyak ka ng wala sa oras e'di kumalat 'yang make-up mo." I chuckled at that.

Niyakap niya ako, yumakap din ako sa kanya pabalik. Napabitaw lang kami sa isa't-isa nang bumukas ang pintuan ng C.R.

Iniluwa nito si Secret. She smiled widely when she saw us. She looked really pretty even in her natural look, paano pa kaya ngayong may light make-up siya?

Pumasok siya sa C.R. at lumapit sa amin. "Nandito lang pala kayo. Pumunta pa ako sa comfort room ng senior high school, akala ko kasi nandoon kayo." She giggled.

Hinampas naman siya ni Arjelyn sa braso. "Gaga ka, 'di ba sinabi ko naman sa'yo kanina na sa likod kami ng Gymnasium na C.R. ang pupuntahan namin." Singhal niya. "'Yan tuloy pinagod mo pa ang sarili mo!"

Mahina akong napatawa dahil parang Nanay kung magalit si Arjelyn.

"Sorry na…" nakangusong yumuko si Secret. Para siyang bata na pinapagalitan ng nanay niya.

"Ewan ko sa'yo." Umirap si Arjelyn sa ere bago siya bumaling sa akin.

"Halika na, Selenn, tama na ang drama," mataray na aniya. "Hindi ka naman naming pwedeng iwanan dito dahil nag-iisa ka lang. 'Yung bruhilda mong kaibigan, iniwan ka na."

Napangiwi ako. “Grabe ka naman, Arjelyn. Maybe Diancia just wanted to…explore I guess?” Hindi siguradong sagot ko.

Arjelyn is somehow right…I guess? After a week when Kiara left, Diancia started giving me cold shoulders. I felt like she’s avoiding me and started hanging out with someone else, specifically Sxiandra. Nakakausap ko naman siya pero madalas ang paraan ng pagsagot niya sa akin ay malamig, seryoso at parang…galit. But I just ignored it, maybe she’s just sad that Kiara left, so I understand her. 

Since that day, I started hanging out with Arjelyn, Secret, Tessia, Romeo, Tober, anb Kit. Actually, they were kinda fun hanging out. I never felt left-out. I was happy that they never treated me like others. It’s not that I’m using them para lang may kasama ako.

Why would I use them kung nand’yan naman sila Luther, Tarius, at Wence para samahan ako?

Just like Diancia, I wanted to explore and hang out with others too. Gusto kong lumabas sa comfort zone ko na matagal ko nang pinagkulungan ng sarili ko.

Were on our way to the Gymnasium when my phone suddenly rang. I fished it out from my skirt’s pocket. I saw my mother’s name flash on the screen.

Malawak akong napangiti bago sinagot ang tawag. They told me last night that they’ll attend today so I was expecting and waiting for them.

“Hi, Mommy!” I energetically greeted her.

"Hello, sweetie, is the ceremony starting?" My Mom asked, slowly.

I looked at Arjelyn. "Let's go," she mouthed. I smiled at her then signaled my hand to her.

"Mauna na kayo." I mouthed. She nodded then dragged Secret, making me chuckle.

"Nah, not yet, Mommy." I started to roam around. I walked slowly while talking.

"About that, sweetie…" she trailed off. I heard her sigh. 

Nahinto ako sa paglalakad nang marinig ko ang paghugot niya ng hiningina.

Alam ko na…why did I even expect that they'll come?

"Kasi…'yung Daddy mo may urgent meeting so…" I cut her off.

"It's okay, Mom, I understand." I sighed. "I-I should go na po…t-the ceremony is about to start." Madiin akong napapikit nang pumiyok ako.

Boses pa lang niya, alam ko nang hindi sila makakadalo.

"Anak…" before she could utter her words, I dropped the call and immediately slipped my phone inside my pocket.

Marahas akong napabuntong hininga at sumandal sa malamig na pader. Mahigpit akong napahawak sa aking palda dahilan kaya medyo lumukot ito ngunit ipinagsawalang bahala ko na lamang ito.

"Selennia beybe!" Napalingon ako sa corridor nang makita ko si Wence na tumatakbo kasama si Tarius.

Hindi talaga nagkakahiwalay itong dalawa. Mga loko-loko talaga.

Umayos ako ng tayo saka sila nginitian. "Hey, anong ginagawa niyo dito?" Tanong ko nang tuluyan na silang nakalapit sa akin.

"Eh, ikaw? Anong ginagawa mo dito?" Balik na tanong sa akin ni Tarius. Gusto kong mapangiwi sa tanong niya pero nauwi ako sa pagtawa dahil sa biglang pag-pameywang.

He looked like a gay! But I doubt that he is. Abnormal lang talaga siya.

"Uh…I was just…roaming around?" I said, unsure about my answer.

"Roaming around?!" Tarius exaggeratedly gasped. "Hindi mo ba alam na kanina ka pa namin hinahanap? Oh my gosh, nakakastress ka!" Pinaypay niya ang sarili gamit ang kanyang kamay.

"'Yung bebe mo nagwawala na kakahanap sa'yo tapos ikaw namamasyal lang? 'Di mo ba alam na halos sirain na ng bebe mo ang mukha ko? OMG, I cannot, mima!" I bursted out laughing. He sounds so gayish and he also acts like one! May papilantik pa ang kamay at kilay siyang ginagawa. Maski si Wence ay napapatawa na rin dahil sa kalokohan niya.

Gosh, I didn't expect na kayang magbakla-baklaan ni Tarius! He looks hilarious! 

"Aba, happy ka, gurl?" Pagtataray niya. "Halika na nga! Masyado ka nang nag-e-enjoy! Jusme ka, 'day! Baka marami nang na-jombag 'yang kalandian mo pero wala naman kayong label!" Tumatawa akong tumango sa kanya. 

He held my right arm and dragged me pero hindi pa man kami nakakalayo nang bumalik kami. Naabutan namin doon si Wence na nakahiga sa sahig at tumatawa.

Oh my…mukhang alam ko na kung kanino nagmana ito. Birds of a feather flocks together. 

"Hoy gago, tama na ang tawa!" Binitawan saglit ni Tarius ang braso ko para yumuko bago hinablot ang collar ni Wence at sapilitang pinatayo.

Hindi ko alam kung matatawa ako o maawa kay Wence dahil imbes na makatayo siya, mas lalo siyang napapahiga dahil nawawalan siguro ng hangin.

"Hala, baka mawalan ng hininga si Wence!" Lumapit ako sa kanila at tinulungan si Tarius na itayo si Wence. I held Wence's arm and assisted him.

"Nah, hindi 'yan!" Tarius laughed. "Ganito ang love language namin, 'di ba babe?" Baling niya kay Wence na tuluyan nang nakatayo at kasalukuyang pinapagpag ang uniporme nito.

Pabiro siyang inirapan nito. "Ulol!" Sagot ni Wence sabay taas ng middle finger niya.

Tinawanan lang siya no'ng isa bago walang sabi na inakbayan ako. Napangiwi ako dahil muntikan na kaming nabuwal sa kinatatayuan namin.

Ang bigat ng braso niya.

"Buti pa kami ni Wence may label, kayo?" Pang-aasar niya pa.

Nginusuan ko siya. "Manahimik ka nga…" namumulang saway ko.

Speaking of Xyrex, I haven't seen him since I came here to school. Where could he be?

I admire him, really. Nakaya niya akong ligawan ng ilang buwan. Arjelyn mentioned to me that boys nowadays are impatient, kung anong gusto nila dapat makuha agad-agad…pero hindi naman siguro lahat. I mean, hindi naman lahat ng boys ay red flag. 

Sa limang buwan na panliligaw sa akin ni Xyrex, pinag-iisipan ko pa rin ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya. I mean…yes, I like him but it doesn't mean na I should say my 'yes' to him. Gusto kong pag-isipan muna ang magiging desisyon ko dahil ayo'kong magsisi sa bandang huli. I want it to be worth it.

I have no plans na paasahin siya, na hindi siya sagutin. Sasagutin ko naman siya pero naghahanap ako ng magandang timing besides…I haven't introduced him to my parents yet and also, I haven't meet his parents too. I was planning to introduce him to my parents today but I guess it's not yet the right time.

Nang makarating kami sa tapat ng Gymnasium naabutan namin si Xyrex na may isang estudyanteng kinakausap. Xyrex looked serious while the student…didn't even look scared at him. He was just staring at him with blank emotion.

"Oh shit, nag-ha-heart to heart talk na naman siguro ang magkapatid." Ngising saad ni Tarius.

"Magkapatid?" I asked.

"Oo, magkapatid sila…hindi lang halata." Wence chuckled. 

Pinagmasdan ko ang dalawa. Hindi nga halatang magkamukha sila. Xyrex looks dominant and strict but he has this lively aura that not all people can see while the other one looks serious and stricter than Xyrex. Walang emosyon ang kanyang mukha at kahit nakasalamin ito ng makapal, makikita pa rin ang nakakatakot na aura nito, he looks younger than Xyrex.

"Selenn, I think you need to go first. Mauna ka na sa loob, kakausapin lang namin itong dalawa." Wence said. I just gave him a nod.

THE ceremony started. All the students are sitting at their respective chairs, looking happy and enjoying the moment, while me…here I am, sitting, feeling so sad.

I wanted to talk to Selenn or Arjelyn but they're far away from me. Alphabetically kasi ang pagkakaayos ng aming upuan at ang katabi ko ngayon ay hindi ko gaano ka-close kaya hindi ako umiimik pero tuwing tumitingin naman siya sa akin ay ngumingiti ako.

“Now, let’s proceed to Mrs. Teryquin elcante’s advisory class, the Grade 10-Zircon!” Our Principal announced.

I was so preoccupied that I didn’t even understand what our Principal just said. I was busy playing with my hands, not paying attention to what's happening in my surroundings.

"Selennia Iccen Coftia, with highest honor!" Isang malakas na palakpakan ang gumising sa akin sa reyalidad.

I looked around and saw almost everyone looking and smiling at me. My forehead creased.

What's happening?

"Selenn, tinatawag ka na sa stage. You have an award!" Klea, my classmate, muttered smilingly. "Congrats!"

For a second, I couldn't process everything what she said so I was just staring at her with confusion but when I heard Sir Tery's voice, calling my name, doon ko lang napagtanto na pinapaakyat na pala ako sa stage!

Nakakahiya!

Blushing, I made my way to the stage. Hindi ko magawang igala ang aking paningin dahil sa kahihiyan. Mas lalong namula ang aking mukha nang may marinig akong mahihinang tawanan.

"Congratulations, hija." Sir Tery shook my hand as I accepted my diploma. Inilayo niya ang mikropono sa kanyang bibig bago muling nagsalita. "Where's your parents, Selenn?" He asked, smiling. 

Tahimik lang akong umiling, his mouth formed an 'O' then slowly nodded while smiling.

Yumuko ako ng kaunti habang nakaharap sa kanya upang tanggapin ang medalya nang may maramdaman akong presensya ng isang tao.

"Sir, may I?" A familiar baritone voice filled my ears.

As I looked up, I gasped.

"Xyrex…W-What are you doing here?" I whispered.

He smirked but didn't utter anything. In my peripheral vision, I saw Sir Tery grinning widely as he shook his head. I gulped when I saw him give the medal to Xyrex.

Oh geez.

Mariin akong napakagat ng aking labi nang unti-unti niyang isuot sa akin ang medalya. Dahan-dahan akong lumingon sa mga tao. The crowd was super wild! They keep on screaming and chanting. But that's not what caught my attention.

Oh no.

"Mommy…"

I saw her, staring at me with no emotion in her face.

Oh, God, save me.