It's really very rude you know? when you drop a single comment after reading a long chapter over 3500 words, not only that few readers request to get the update soon, who hardly ever drop their views.
Just remember, in every single Update a writer put all her efforts, valuable time to keep you guys glued to her book. It's not an easy task.

Avni

"He will make sure that hurt would never gonna reach you" saying this next second I'm caged between his arms.

Kabir pulled me in a hug and I let him do it. I heard him leaving a sigh in relief when I didn't pulled away. Everything he confided, the effect is debilitating. I can allow him to at least hold me, after all he has gone through so much. Because of me.
I couldn't help but my jaw trembled at the thought I'm reason he is hurt. I never wanted this. Not to him , not to anybody.

"I don't believe in another birth and all those shitty stuffs. But if they say are all true then you are not staying away me, there will be no Neil if we by any chance meet again somewhere on earth" he pulled back, said in a grumpy tone. A small cute pout formed his lips and a small gasped blew out of me. I'm numb. I feel very very sad at his little stunt. I can't breath, my chest is aching.

Not a single second his words made me feel discomfort or inappropriate they appeared, rather the more he talked the worse it hit that guilt feeling inside of me.
This beautiful soul deserve best of everything.

Okay that was intense, intimate. A little too much for my liking.

Kabir might have noticed the air change into much reluctant around us so by his statement next he tried to dissolved it down.

"Just saying. It's a joke never mind" adjusting his glasses he shrugged it of and let out a throaty laugh at my blank facade as a result of his words previously, but even so I can see how sad his eyes are. There was forever in those eyes.  My heart clenched at the sight. This is why he is always been an extra sweet to me whereas he has been a bratty child and needles to say arrogant to most of the people knows him.

Nonetheless may God bless him with an amazing life partner, the way he deserves. He is a good Guy you know him right?
I immediately prayed to God and took in a heavy breath. As my heart rapid beating is slowing down, I started relaxing on my seat.

Few more minutes we kept sitting there on that couch in a awkward silence facing away each other, other than that uninterrupted mechanical sound from television, our eyes blankly on the tv screen which I have no idea at what point the movie plot has moved. I just want to leave this spot, plop on my bed, hug my favourite cushion and go to sleep.

Meanwhile few more minutes of sitting there not talking to eachother, I shifted gingerly and finally took attempt to brake the silence with a faint harrumph before I said "we should go to sleep, umm..you must be tired, I'm sure" I let out a awkward laugh and craned my eyes to see the wall clock at the back side of his head, then brought my eyes back at him.

His gaze followed the line of my vision and he smiled nodding in agreement must be.

Next second Kabir stretched his hand to grabbed the remote. He put the television off.

I reluctantly rose off my seat bidding him goodnight. His palm rubbed his face harshly releasing away his fatigue then he wished me back with his voice low and mortified.

My steps advanced towards the upstairs when I heard him mimicked my actions behind shuffling to get off his seat.

I heard Kabir slauntered to the guest room. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

Why we can't stop loving the person we know will never reciprocate us the way we do?

Why it is so difficult to move on out of that relationship which has been totally one-sided?

Why we want that person who we know would never want us?

Why it is always we had to break someone's heart before we love someone?

Why we have to choose the right person after the wrong one, why not the right one first?

Why don't everyone deserves a happy ending?

Why love has to be so complicated?

Yes we all loved that person who never loved us as we do. No matter if we had it know already.

Later I ransacked my brain if there any sign I have noticed, that ever says kabir has a thing for me? And guess what I saw;There are many.

*

Now stop thinking about him instead think about yourself, your pityful state. His is suffice hot and good looking for not to get the distraction. Albeit he will. he will get a blonde or brunette soon. And with this my subconscious bitch is back with her sassy remarks and I can't hate her enough. My chest puffed out a giant sigh of exasperation response.

"You are the best thing that ever happened to me" I fought a smile looking at the text Neil has sent me around 12am. My heart swelled up. He is such a cutie.

Neil will kill me if I again resume calling it to him. He used to get mad whenever I uttered that word for him, he says he hate that word, it doesn't fit with someone hot like him. Hot huh. Log bhina kintey galat faimi mein jeetey hai. A scornful scoff escaped my lips, eyes rolled dramatically.

Really? My subconscious self scoffed at me and I made a face.

God what is happening to me? Why I'm acting so childish? Is this another sign or something? I need to talk to Jui. She is gynecologist. I thought then immediately I realised.

OMG I didn't tell her yet about my current status. She is gonna murder me for being this reckless.

Reckless! I couldn't tag it as reckless. It was sweet love making. I blushed, my cheeks are beetroot red.

Oh God what am I even thinking? What's wrong?

Kabir
"Didn't know it, the day I will truly put my heart out it will be a disaster"

Yes there were many sighs can say I have a thing for her, let alone the vibes. Nothing was there as clear as sky. Even though I didn't wish her see those most of the time. (That was the biggest mistake) To the people, I'm known as a kind of dork person. Whereas my patient are the different case. They love me.

I talk occasionally or you can say I prefer keep my feelings to myself rather than displaying them attracting any kind of attention. This shall be the last thing I would want : someone's attention. But when I did I did it badly for an only person, that is Avni.

She is the person I never dared to speak.

I always liked her yet tried hard not to fall for that winsome face( and ofcourse her as a brilliant person any boy would want to be with her) who had me several sleeplessness nights, as well as uncountable bad days. Because of her my mood used be at edge almost all the time, yet she is the reason I can be sweet.
But the day I heard mama said her real mom means Aaheli Chatterjee once shared a wish to my Mom. That she wants to get her daughter married to her bestfriend's son, it's me. Yes our families are that close. Me and Ayan Bhai is like real brothers. He has been always like a mentor to me.

like Wooaw parents do sometimes the most childish thing and the best part is they never even realise it and their those powerful stunts could actually break how many hearts throughout that insane process they hardly get any idea about.

Tell me if I should laugh or bark.

And that's it to get more kick to my already burden heart who has started having feelings for Avni. It was kind of a crush intitally but gradually it changes into something deep, never ending. Since she left uni I thought this is the time I would be over her. I was so wrong though.

I didn't know she has the same effect over me until.......that evening
Reyaansh uncle called Dad one day and after a long talk over that call he made clear that he is thinking of me and Avi together.

And as expected I was in cloud nine. I started day dreaming about her being in my room, in my bed, in my arms.
Now I know how divvy I felt, I should have talked to her before I hurt my heart. Only my bad is I wasn't cognizant of the fact that someone as beautiful as her can't be single forever. Unlucky me.

Her health issues never been a big deal to me or my parents the moment Reyaansh uncle reveal it to us few years ago in a conference abroad, me and Dad went to attend in London we assured him there is hope and I can prove it. He was so happy and promised us a call very soon.
Even Neela Aunty was there, but Reyaansh uncle talk to Dad privately about the whole thing and Dad was supper supportive the moment he sensed I like her. Dad never failed surprising me.

I can make thousands of babies with her, it's not an issue as such from my end. We can always go for IVF, Surrogacy, options are there.
That's what I thought. Which is now only a unrequited wish. A past.

My stomach flipped at the thought, not in excitement but in dejection from the very fact I know she will never return my love. Avni will be always my first.

My endless.....forget it. I don't want to discuss it further, not in my head either.

Once Ayan Bhai has said...
"there is no fun getting everything we want in life, sometimes it worth feeling the pain of not getting half of it. That's how we human survive, learn to let go things we ever wanted them the most "

It took all of my willpower not to act clingy but let her go. This time.
Good bye love.

I smiled. It's time to move on.

*

Avni

"What would you say if Dadda ask you about it. I mean that thing...um...you know what I mean?" I said in a tone low than normal when Mom and Dad isn't paying attention toward us.
Our last night conversation is still ricocheting off my heart. So I asked kabir when his facade were grown in fully praising mood for my mom's kalonji luchi and Dum aloo breakfast. (Luchi is Poori in Hindi)

"Nope. What's it?" Stuffing his mouth full he said in a face as if nothing happened between us last night, we never talked.

How could someone change within a night? I stared at him like he is an alien sitting beside eating breakfast, then realising my stupidity staring at him too long. I darted my gaze away and concentrated on my food. I'm mortified been staring at him that closely. God knows what he thought.

"Stupid" the only word I muttered letting out my little frustration over his that awful aloofness suddenly he pulled up.

"Come again" he said in an amusing tone, leaning his had towards me. Stupid. I repeated in my brain, obviously. I so want to snatch that faint smirk his lips have put on.

"Nothing" I whispered gritting, stuffed my mouth harshly.

"Well that conversation never took place" he pulled away his head straightening his face he said. His voice left that amusement, now it is serious. Good for him. Should I smirk like he did?

"What do you mean?" My forehead crinkled. I paused munching the food in my mouth.

"I meant we never talked" he said before he grabbed a glass of water and took few sips.
Is he real?

Like he would give up? I wanted to say this in reply. But thought to remain quite. Okay I got it, this way the forever insolent, standoffish Kabir Sinha comes back. I rolled my eyes and puffed through my nose a tiny tiring sigh. My shoulder slacken, I resumed my breakfast without a single word exchange any further. Through my peripheral vision I saw Kabir mimicked my action then He went for scrolling his ph silently in between munching his food. Heights of nonchalant-ness. I don't know if there any such word exist in English dictionary.

Thereafter few minutes passed all my attention was on a spot; over the kitchen Island where mom and Dad is full enthralled making another cup of tea for us. It's Sunday so there is no hurry.

Or better I would say Dad is making his special masala tea, the ingredients he never shares to anyone, neither mom has any idea about it. As I say he never shares.
But I like when they are like this. The way they are right now. Fighting like two grumpy kids in the kitchen who are not in mood compromising a space for the person beside. Mom won't leave her spot watching him and Dad wouldn't let her be there. What's the point to go all nuts everytime they share the kitchen? Nobody has the answer.

My dad is everything but not a cool kind of person.

Speaking of Dad it reminds me I need to talk to him or to Mamma. Before he over cook it. Not the tea. My life it is.

~~~~~~~

Thank you so much for reading.

Love MoN ❣️