"You really don't need to do anything, honey, we can take care of the cooking ourselves" Taehyung insists with concern as he watches me hold the very sharp knife with wary eyes, something about the way I hold and use it that worries him.

I don't understand why he feels that way when I'm just cutting potatoes, though. I feel like I'm doing a pretty good job.

"No, I'm fine, Taehyung" I also insist as I keep my eyes on my task at hand, knife used the way a samurai probably used their katana long ago. I raise the knife at a good height, hold it above the potato and...

"Yah!".

Shlack

"Oh my goddess, is she worse than Namjoon?"

"I think they're pretty much on the same level hyung, just... they're on a slightly different spectrum?".

Jungkook's eyes are darting between my hands and the cutting board, his nerves going above and beyond as he observes his omega cut the potatoes in a way that he didn't think possible. Am I going to war?

I turn the angled potato around to cut it again. Knife raised, then shlack.

"I don't know why you guys keep thinking that it's hard for me. It's pretty easy" I muse as I continue with my odd ways. They're not the perfect, even shapes but potatoes are potatoes, right? It all tastes the same in the end.

Is this how I used to cook in the past? Or have I gotten worse because of my amnesia? Yoongi really wants to know right now. Maybe it explains why I used to always eat frozen meals and ramyeon. It seems to explain a whole lot, actually.

"Easy?" Jungkook repeats with a disconcerted look on his face.

I nod. "Easy. Look".

Shlack

"Y-yeah, looks real easy, pup".

"It also looks very dangerous" Jin finally speaks up as he comes around to stand behind me, a hand immediately grabbing the one that's holding the knife before I strike it down on the persecuted potato again.

There's a common sigh of relief that echoes in the kitchen as he takes the weapon from me, and I stare up at him with an offended frown, his gaze meeting mine with an expression that says he's not playing games right now.

"I wasn't dangerous. I didn't threaten anyone, did I?".

"Baby, that potato has been your prey for ten minutes now. We'll never eat at this pace" the alpha counters with a shake of the head, eyes falling on the poor thing that has clearly seen better days. Parts of it are mashed and it wasn't even boiled yet.

Taehyung and Jungkook work in tandem to get me out of the kitchen at the first occasion, and I look very displeased as Yoongi and Jimin take my place with obvious relief over their soft features. It sure leaves a bitter taste in my mouth that they don't trust me with a knife.

Whether that was really dangerous or not... I don't think it was that bad.

"Maybe we can go and do something else, honey" the sweet alpha tries to get my attention elsewhere, a distraction is what this is. He won't get me, this is not going to work. I said I would help and this is what I will do.

Jungkook, seeing the look on my face, continues as he holds my chin the other way, towards the tv and the gaming console he brought along for me. "We could do something else, like this. I'm sure you'll like the games I got for you. Let's play together, I can show you how the controls work".

"But the cooking-"

"No".

I'm forcefully brought to the living room where Namjoon and Hoseok are already sat with a peaceful smile on their faces, the antics of the pack nothing to disturb them when they're already used to it. It's rather endearing, actually.

Taehyung sits down, then pulls me over his lap between the two alphas before I can retort again about my fate while Jungkook gets everything ready for me, seeing as I don't know how those work yet.

He turns on the console, selects a game from the lot, then grabs the controllers before dropping himself over Namjoon with a happy hum. The older man sighs before moving his book aside, arms wrapping around the younger's slender waist to be more comfortable.

"There. The left joystick is for moving, and the right one is for moving the view. A to interact, B to jump". With that begins a series of grumbles as I try to complete the tutorial with my mates encouragements. It's kind of weird, but it's also kind of fun. I can see the appeal in the game for sure.

I do fail at the first boss fight a few times, but Jungkook gives me a pretty good hint when he sees that I'm on my way to getting angry at the tv, and thankfully, the next attempt goes as smooth as the knife I used earlier.

I'm brought to the next level, and I bring my gaze back to the kitchen, a feeling of longing settling within because... that should've been me there.

I really wanted to help them at least with preparing the food, they've done so much for me after all, ever since I woke up from the coma. If I truly was dangerous with the knife... they could've shown me how to use it correctly instead of kicking me out.

Hoseok pats my thigh as he observes the look on my face with scrutiny.

"You know, bun... we all have our own little tasks around the pack, and though we do proceed with a rotation for the big ones, we often go with what we're best at doing. Namjoon, for example, doesn't do the cooking, but he does the cleaning because he's good at it. Jungkook is good at laundry and he enjoys doing it, so that's usually his task. Some of us aren't particularly good at anything, so we help around whenever needed, like Taehyung and I, and that's totally fine".

I purse my lips as I turn slightly in Taehyung's embrace to stare at Hoseok. He gently pokes my nose with a soft finger, then brushes his knuckles over my cheek with a loving gaze upon seeing the sad glow in my eyes.

"You don't need to be good at everything to be helpful. Sometimes, all someone needs is a smile and a helping hand here and there. Maybe cooking isn't your forte, but you can do other things well. You'll find your place eventually, baby".

"Yeah... thanks, Hobi".

As his hand leaves my cheek, I turn my gaze back to the tv while trying to merge more with the alpha holding me, his arms wrapped comfortably around my curves and our legs intertwined together. I stare at the controller still in my hands, then move the left joystick forward with a sigh.

Then a shout resounds from the screen, and I look up to find out that I fell off the cliff and died.

"Oh".

Jungkook snorts out a giggle, and I find myself laughing too as the ridiculousness of the situation processes.

Namjoon, Taehyung and Hoseok share a small smile as the two of us begin to giggle together, relieved to see that the good ambiance wasn't all ruined while Jimin, Yoongi and Jin go forward with the next step of the dinner.

Establishing a new routine in which I can be satisfied will take adjustments from everyone, but there's always love and for now, that's really all we need.

---

A couple more days go by smoothly during which I rest and recover well, and I can't say that a lot happened during that time, though I was never left alone for too long as one alpha was nearly always with me, if not two.

I stayed home and familiarized myself with my new life and environment, but one thing that has continually bothered me since then has been my incapacity to help in the kitchen, or in anything, really. I don't know why it makes me so mad to not be able to help them, but it does.

There was no ill intentions coming from my mates, they simply don't want me to hurt myself or to overdo it, but I find myself feeling rejected whenever it happens. I want to be better. Not only for them, but also for myself and it feels like they're taking that from me.

My first goal as my new me, I eventually realize. Something I want to put the effort in to achieve.

And so, on a day when I'm left alone due to everyone being busy with work - which for the first time doesn't leave me feeling restless - it seems obvious to me when I look up online to find some cooking classes nearby.

If my mates won't teach me, then all I need to do is find someone who'll do it instead, right?

I find a few different ones before settling with the most beginner-friendly class of the lot, and as I sign up for it and come to a page asking for the method of payment, I pay the fee with the card I was given by Yoongi, one that he said I could use for anything I wanted.

I did hesitate for a moment, but seeing as my bank account is pitiful at the moment, I eventually relented, telling myself that the fee wasn't that big and that I could always repay him after I got a job somewhere.

I haven't told any of my mates yet, but I've thought about it often since I got back home and came to the conclusion that it would be for the best. I intend to look around to find a workplace that could offer me a safe environment to familiarize myself with the outside world again.

Staying at home with the pack won't teach me anything useful anytime soon considering that they keep doing everything for me, and going out with them... I somehow feel like we would reach the same result.

I need to do this on my own. I'm a big girl after all, so if not now, then when? The longer I wait, the more scared I'll get.

I quickly receive an email stating that I was successfully added to the list for the cooking class, followed by a link opening to a schedule of all the different lessons showing what would be made that day, which I really like. Sometimes, it's desserts while other times, it's sandwiches, pasta, meat.

I apparently don't need to be present for all of the classes if I don't want to be there, as long as I'm aware that the price paid included every lessons and that no refund would be allowed without a good reason. Seeing as there's one today and I'm on my own...

Why not go?

I quickly get dressed with the beautiful clothes that Jimin made, then attempt a small and natural makeup look using Jin's products before looking into the mirror with a pleased sigh. It feels good to pamper myself like this.

Of course, I am nervous about going out alone for the first time. I would certainly feel much better if one of my mates was with me, but I also know that I need to be brave, so at least doing this makes me feel more confident.

If I feel good about how I look, then I won't be so intimidated by the glances I'm given. My size is something that I'm still getting used to, so I'm oddly... aware that any stares I would receive from strangers would not necessarily be a compliment.

Still, I have to say that the more I think about going out there, the more I'm excited to tell everyone about my day later tonight. I'm sure they'll be proud of me when I let them know that I was brave and went outside despite my anxiety.

With my pulse beating strongly in my veins, I grab my bag and keys before standing at the door, a hand clutched at my heart. I can do this. I will go out there, take the bus downtown, then enjoy the cooking class and show off to my mates at the end of the day.

I nod to myself, then exit the house before walking to the bus stop nearby, which is convenient since I can't drive. I simply cannot find the interest for it anyway, so it doesn't really bother me. I feel like taking the bus will do the job a plenty.

I don't find a lot of people around here at this time of the day, so I let my eyes wander the houses in my street with wonder, because in all honesty, every and each one of them are huge and luxurious. I even pass by the pack's house, recognizing it only because Jimin pointed it out for me on the way back from the hospital.

No cars in the large driveway, and every lights are turned off.

I continue for a few more minutes until I find the stop, then wait there with my online bus pass ready to be used in my phone, which I paid for with my own money this time. I got ten tickets, so that should last me for a while, I think.

It takes another five minutes before the huge vehicle finally gets here, and I board without too much struggle. Finding an empty seat near the back, I hurry over and make a move to sit down right as the driver starts driving again, which nearly sends me face first on the floor.

Heart stuttering in growing nerves and eyes blinking quickly, I try to ignore my embarrassment to instead keep an eye on the surroundings once sat, because I'm not really sure exactly where it is that I need to stop yet.

The bus stops at regular intervals, with people coming in and out nearly all the time. There comes a time when the space becomes so cramped that I need to make myself smaller besides the window, then others when it's almost entirely empty, only to get overfilled again.

The experience turns slightly sour when a group of young men need to stand to fit in, their eyes on me and whispering not so discreetly about how I should give them my space and get some exercise instead, though I try to ignore them with a smile plastered on my face.

I'm not giving them the satisfaction of hurting me even if inside, it does hurt a little.

When comes the stop that I was waiting for, I hurry out - not without almost tripping on the way - then follow the map all the way to the building where the cooking class should be happening. Luckily for me, I'm only twenty minutes early so I shouldn't have to wait for long.

Deciding to stand by the locked door, I lean against the brick wall, eyes on the sky while my ears and nose absorb the liveliness of a downtown life, which is so different from the calm street where I live. Cars pass by constantly, people walk without a care for those around them while others chat and laugh together, and scents mingle and sway with the wind.

Tourists visit the surrounding shops, the words they speak not always ones I understand, their different ethnicities catching my eye and making me wonder where they could be from more than once. It must feel good to look so pretty.

The thought is sneaky, merging itself with the others so easily that I barely notice it until something strikes me as wrong. I just compared myself to them, didn't I?

A car suddenly stops in front of the building and a beautiful woman - a beta - steps out from the passenger's seat with a bag over her shoulder before leaning back in to kiss the driver, who I assume must be her mate.

She steps back with a happy giggle, a few loving words shared between them, and she's about to close the door when her gaze notices me standing near. The next thing I know, she freezes still like someone who just saw a ghost materialize right in front of them.

She quickly pats the seat inside the car before leaving the door open as she runs to me, eyes turning watery as her hands grab mine immediately.

"Y/N? What are you doing alone out here? Yeoppie said that your mates were giving you a few more days before taking you outside!" she reveals shakily with a warm chocolatey voice, information that I am hearing for the first time.

"Er... I'm afraid none of them were wise enough to let me know" I mutter lightly with an awkward laugh. "I'm here for the cooking lesson. I signed up earlier, then figured I could come when I found that a lesson was happening this afternoon. Was that a wrong assumption? Should I have waited?" I ask, suddenly worried about whether my presence here could cause an inconvenience of sorts.

The woman quickly shakes her head, her eyes still in disbelief to see me here, fingers tight around my own. At the sound of another door opening and closing, we both look in its direction to find a tall alpha staring at me with utter shock on his face.

"I'm very sorry for what I'm about to say" I apologize beforehand, clearly noticing that they knew me from before my amnesia. "I fear that I don't remember you. I got into a... er... situation and ended up forgetting everything. Am I supposed to know you?".

The beta blinks her tears away at the realization that to me, a stranger is currently holding my hands. She releases me, then steps back a respectful distance, her gingerbread scent comforting and soothing. Her mate, who smells like black coffee, joins her side, his eyes round like little marbles.

"Y/N. Y-you're not supposed to be here" he repeats the same words as the beta, and again, why do they know something I don't? My mates are going to have to be more specific with me if they make plans without my knowledge.

"Let's go inside for now" the woman says after rubbing a hand over the alpha's shoulder, after which she goes to unlock the building's door. "To answer your question, Y/N... In-yeop and you used to work together, you were close friends. He called Hoseok almost every day since the incident to hear about you".

I follow her inside with a frown, that's not something I was told, yet again. I'm definitely going to have a word with my mates later tonight. I might be an omega, I might not remember my old life, but that doesn't mean they should treat me like I cannot handle anything. I deserve to know what is linked to my person.

The alpha, In-yeop, holds a steady pace behind me, something protective about the way he stands like a wall between us and the door. It's... familiar, in a way. I don't know if it's just my imagination, but it's like I've experienced this kind of feeling with this exact scent before. It's comforting, safe.

We make it inside a large kitchen where are several separate working tables with sinks and stoves, and my eyes widen in amazement. This is where I'm to learn from now on, right? It will certainly be a lot of fun, considering that my mates don't ruin it for me.

"As for me" she continues softly, "I'm his pack's beta, Bora. We met a few times in the past, and I used to share some of our pack's food with you. We weren't exactly... close friends, but we all cared for you. You were our pack alpha's protégé after all, you were important to us".

His protégé... yes, that sounds right, for some reason.

"I see" I murmur softly, eyes staring back at the alpha with a guilty frown. "I'm sorry that I forgot all about you. If only Hoseok had told me about you, I would have made time to see you sooner. You must have worried so much for all this time".

He shakes his head reassuringly, pheromones pushing out to fight against my sense of guilt. They wrap comfortingly around me, calming and easing down my nerves, as if he's so attuned to how my body works that he could do so his eyes closed.

"Don't worry about it, Y/N, you had enough to deal with as it is. We have a common friend, Dal, an omega who used to work with us. He... he had trouble handling the news of your accident and had to stop working indefinitely, he's so sensitive after all. His pack took him on a trip to try and help but... would it be alright if I let him know about how you're doing right now?".

I had two friends, and my mates didn't think to let me know? An anger starts to brew from within the pit of my stomach, each new bits of information feeding a storm that will soon befall the pack. They won't know what hit them, and I don't intend to make this a fun time for them.

"Feel free to let him know, In-yeop. You can even call him, if that can help. I don't mind talking to him and answer any questions he might have while I'm here, I'm partly responsible for his state so I should help any way I can".

His eyes show the immense relief that my words offer him, and he nods softly before grabbing his phone while Bora smiles at me, a hand ushering me closer.

"Come, I'll show you to your station in the meantime. I'm so excited to teach you about the joys of cooking and baking, you weren't really... you had a hard time doing good things for yourself in the past" she reveals softly as she brings me to a clean table with all the basic equipment I could need. "I offered many times to help, but you weren't ready for that step yet. I'm very happy to see you here today".

I hum as she speaks, that does seem to fit the bits and pieces I could fit into the puzzle of my past. I feel pity for my past self, who couldn't find it in herself to accept happiness. Whatever that ex mate of mine did, it sure broke me.

I wonder how it would affect me to see him again now. Would a part of me recognize him? Such a silly thought, but if we were to cross paths someday soon, I would want to show him how strong and confident I am now. That he did not ruin my life, and that I am happier than ever.

"I feel lucky that I had such good people looking over me" I muse softly, a hand caressing the machines that I will eventually learn to use. "I wish you could be part of that new future I'm building for myself. If you would like to, of course. You'll probably notice that I'm... different from the 'me' you knew before, but I hope you don't let that disturb you too much".

She smiles, then rests a warm hand over mine, eternal love flashing in her eyes as she gazes at me with affection. "We wish for nothing less, Y/N. It will be a pleasure to get to know who you are today. You do seem a lot more confident and proud of yourself, and it warms my heart to see".

I share her smile with a fondness settling deep inside my heart, and then In-yeop takes that moment to come back, before he hesitantly hands me his phone. "Dal would like to hear your voice. He doesn't need to hear anything specific. He just wants to hear you".

I accept the device carefully, as if by doing so, I get to hold the omega himself, then bring it up to my ear. I hear only a soft breath on the other side, slightly shaky.

"Dal, right? This is Y/N" I start off softly. "You must have heard about my amnesia from In-yeop, I'm sorry for the way the news affected you. He said your pack took you somewhere nice, are you feeling better there? Are they taking good care of you?".

A sniffle reaches my ear and my heart softens, achingly so. 'Noona' the young man whimpers softly, tears laced in every tremble of the word. "I thought I would never get to hear your voice again, that you would start over without us, I was so scared. Noona, are you really okay now? Are you happy? You're not sad anymore?'.

I blink slowly at his questions, and something in them makes my emotions stir, a deep, old pain that is familiar, yet a stranger to me. "I'm not sad anymore, Dal" I answer softly. "I'm doing good, for real. I'm freely being who I want to be, who I think my past self would've wanted to be. I signed up for a cooking lesson because I've found that I'm not very good at it".

He giggles softly, a wet sound to the noise, and I smile. 'Yeah, you never really liked cooking much. I'm glad that you're willing to give it a try now. It feels good to hear your voice, noona, you sound... different, in a good way. Thank you for agreeing to talk with me today, it... it makes me feel a lot better already'.

"Of course, Dal. I'm sorry for forgetting all about you, but I promise that should you want to, I'm more than willing to work on our friendship again. It might be different from the one we had, but it would be a pleasure for me to have you and In-yeop in my life again".

The alpha's eyes crease the slightest bit at my words, and a decision I've made has never felt as right as this one does.

'I was hoping you would say that, you don't know how happy you're making me right now' Dal chirps, his tears now forgotten as he seems to vibrate with new energy. 'I promise to let you know when I'm back in the city, we could go for a coffee somewhere then'.

"I would love that. Going for a coffee sounds nice" I muse softly, feeling so deeply warm in my chest. Talking to another omega feels nice, someone who can understand what I go through better than any other second gender. It's a different energy from the alphas I'm always with.

'Alright, we'll talk again, noona. I don't want to keep you from exploring your new cooking adventure. I'll send you a message later, okay?'.

I hum with a small smile. "Okay. Thank you, Dal. Have fun out there with your pack and please let them know that I'm sorry for the trouble I gave them. It was never my intention to affect so many people with my amnesia".

'No. It's not your fault, noona, you have nothing to apologize about. Focus on taking care of yourself, that's all that matters. I'll see you soon?' he asks softly, slight vulnerability in his voice.

"Soon, yeah" I muse, and on that note, we end the call, after which I give the phone back to In-yeop. "Thank you for this" I let him know sincerely. "I didn't know how much I craved for friendship until now. It's nice to have that desire wake up within me. I can't have only my mates in my life, after all".

He nods seriously, phone pushed in his pocket with a light frown on his face. "Of course. Just... don't be too mad at your mates for hiding us from you. Hoseok and the others wanted to ease the revelations at a slow pace, give you time to settle".

I sigh deeply at that, then shake my head.

"I appreciate that they care for my well-being, In-yeop, but that's not their decisions to make. I deserve to know about such important things as friends who mattered to me, or that they expect me to stay home like a domesticated dog without first asking me how I feel about it".

He winces slightly at my choice of words, uncertainty flashing in his eyes at the real anger he can see in mine. It's clear that I'm serious, and I am prepared to take action. I will not keep silent on something so important to me.

They told me to not keep silent, to speak up at all time, so that's exactly what I'll do.

Bora shares a worried glance with her alpha, but they don't add anything more. They can see that I won't change my mind, and in some deep corner of themselves, they're relieved to see me standing up for myself for once. This is good, even if it will cost the alphas watching over me a good scolding.

At this moment, people begin to enter the building to reach their station with pleasant smiles and greetings, and In-yeop sighs in the disappointment of having to go.

"Well, I'll leave you two to it" he says before turning to me again. "If you need anything, a lift, company, someone to rant to, or someone to keep the bullies away, let me know. I... I resigned from my previous job, I work at home for a new marketing business now. I can make my own schedule and my colleagues are real nice people, so don't hesitate to call".

There's pride in his voice as he reveals that last bit of information, and I nod with a smile. In-yeop is very kind.

He kisses Bora goodbye, a pat on my head and he's walking out of the building. The beta winks at me as everyone settles in their rightful spot, curious eyes falling on the newcomer that I am, and she walks to the front of the room to introduce me.

Seeing all the friendly smiles directed at me... it feels good. I'm glad I went out today.