"Oh look who's here, isn't it our favorite fat bitch?".

I sigh as I grab my spare uniform from my locker, one I always keep here for when I need to wash the other one and it's not fully dry in time.

I still can't believe I forgot my uniform in Jimin's car... they're so expensive, I hate that I'm going to have to buy another one again, that wasn't part of my budget but they're not given by the cleaning agency, we have to get ours ourselves.

I should've gotten one during the weekend but... instead I kept staring at the outfit the alpha had gotten me in a daze.

When I'd seen myself in the mirror after reaching home last Friday... I couldn't believe my eyes, because for the first time in a very long time, I liked what I saw.

The clothes didn't enhance what I didn't like about my body, it enhanced what good I have, which I never thought even possible, I honestly cried here and there on random bouts for the last two days and I'm not really sure why.

Was it exhaustion? Disappointment? The mental discomfort that came because of the memories his touching me had brought back? Or was it because I'd finally met someone who treated me with respect and I had to kick him out of my life because I got scared? Maybe it's a bit of everything.

Between remembering how nice he was to me and all the flashbacks I got from my past marriage, needless to say I was a mess.

"I see you're sticking to the bitch now that you know it simply means dog" I state as I lock my locker, I should've bought this lock ages ago but I'm not making the same mistake twice, I can't have my clothes thrown in dirty water all the time, I'm just glad I was allowed to wash them at work, Sophie should've left them in the meeting room for me.

She's a nice beta so I'm not afraid of her pulling a trick on me, she's aware of the bullying but she also knows that there's not much she can do, Hanna and Bee are a favorite of the team and no one would do anything because they're all the same, they're all wicked, all except for her and two other wolves, they bring little comfort in the hell that this place can be.

"No, we prefer the modern meaning of it, which just means you're a hoe. Two men for yourself? Please, they must only spend time with you because they pity you, that's all, I'm sure you mean nothing to them, they'll let you go once they realize how much of a loser you are".

"Wow, thanks for the heads-up, I never knew you cared about my well-being that much, how nice of you" I say with a bored tone before walking past the two girls to head to the bathroom, have I really gotten used to this?

It's a little sad, isn't it?

Hanna scoffs, her scent one of annoyance, the same sickening perfume stuck to her skin. "What's wrong with you today? Why are you so boring?".

I shrug and turn around once at the bathroom's door to stare at them with a blank face. "I don't know, try to be funnier and see if that changes something".

"You-" I enter the room and lock the door behind me before slamming a hand on the porcelain of the expensive sink, fuck they're annoying.

I close my eyes and breathe in deeply to calm myself as pain spreads across my hand and wrist, I wince when it throbs uncomfortably and great, now I'm going to have to work with a sensitive wrist, I must have used too much strength.

I massage it softly before stepping out of my clothes to wear my uniform, we're supposed to meet up soon to get the tasks of the day so I can't waste too much time, I just hope I won't be stuck with H and B all day, I'd rather avoid possibly murdering them, my tolerance has really taken a hit this weekend.

Once done, I tie up my hair like usual and grab my clothes before stepping out to see that they're gone, thank goodness, someone else must've come by and they left together. I reach my locker, unlock it and then put the clothes on the shelf before locking it again, a little tug to it to make sure that it's going to hold and then I'm on my way.

I meet In-yeop and Dal on the way and watch as they slow down so I can reach their side, I smile lightly at the sweet display, they must be the only two persons in the world who I dare consider friends, an alpha and another omega like me.

"Hey noona, how was your weekend?" Dal asks me, his eyes sparkling, he must have had a good one, I can hear the excitement in his voice, his bubblegum so strong that it feels like I'm eating it and indeed, his need to share is so strong that the words are spilling out of him before I can even reply.

"Sorry, let me just tell you about mine first- I'm officially part of a pack! You know how they've been courting me for months now? Well this weekend, they officially asked me to join them! I'm still in shock about it, I moved out of the family pack yesterday" he chirps proudly as he jumps up with a squeal, it takes me everything to not break some more at his words.

A pack... I wonder what it feels like to be part of a healthy one.

"That's wonderful, Dal, I'm very happy for you, I told you it would happen soon" I tell him softly and he nods his head quickly, a little more and he'll start floating over the floor but really, it's good for him, he's a nice guy.

I turn to In-yeop to see his eyes already on me, his fresh coffee has turned darker instead of its usual lightness, it lets me know he saw through me, he always sees too much, this alpha...

"What about you? Did you do something great with your pack?" I ask him to divert his attention, something that doesn't work, he always worries about me even if he won't say it.

"No, we stayed at home this time and watched some tv-shows that we had been pushing back for a while. We also made a lot of food for the week, I brought a bag for you, take it home later, I can give you a ride home if you want".

He did what? He brought me food that was meant for his pack?

"In-yeop-" "Don't refuse, everyone wanted you to accept it, Bora even added some special desserts for you so the bag is pretty heavy, just accept it and let me drive you home, don't go running away, you know I'll find you".

I bite on my bottom lip and look down at my feet, my emotions a turmoil, because am I really allowed to accept? Why would they do that for me? What do they gain from helping me? I can't do anything for them and it makes me feel like a failure, I don't deserve this.

"Just accept, noona, hyung won't say it but he worries about you, he doesn't like that you live alone without a pack by your side, let him do at least this" Dal says with a small nudge to my arm, I eventually nod just so we can drop the subject, I really don't feel at ease receiving help, it makes me feel awkward.

"Okay then... thank you". "It's no problem, Y/N, no problem at all".

Together, we make our way to the meeting room so we can receive our tasks and when we enter the room-

"Look at the size! Those have to be pants for elephants! What is that doing here?" a voice snickers before bursting into laughter along with a few others and I freeze in the doorway as I watch Hanna and Bee hold one end of the waist band each to stretch it in mockery, they know very well that it's mine.

I feel my body heat up in humiliation, Sophie behind them with a look of terror on her face, she tried to stop them but who can stop these girls when most of the team is laughing along? Saying that it's mine and to let it go would only make things worse.

"Oh, Y/N, good timing! Look at this, aren't they just soooo large? What do you think? An elephant would fit inside, wouldn't it?" Bee mocks me with a wide smile on her face and I bring a hand to my neckline to pull on it, why does it feel so tight all of a sudden?

In-yeop steps in front of me and Dal forcefully takes it from their hands to fold properly, Sophie hands him my shirt as well and then he's running out of the room, probably to put it in his own locker where my clothes will be safe, his bubblegum is filled with spikes, he's just as angry as In-yeop, yet not angrier than the alpha.

The latter's coffee is making it hard to breathe with how strong it's gotten but it helps distract my mind from this humiliation just enough so that I can resist the tears threatening to burst free, I really want to hide right now, I feel like trash.

Every wolves in the room turn quiet while the humans scoff their dislike, unaware or simply uncaring that they just irritated an alpha, a pack alpha no less, they're used to commanding order after all and this here is no different, he's seeing red and we can all sense it.

"Come on, we were just joking! We didn't know it was her clothes! But I'm sorry, Y/N, I didn't mean to insult you, we really didn't know! How were we supposed to know that they were yours when they were in the meeting room?" Hanna says with raised hands as if this is no big deal, In-yeop makes a move to stomp her way but I stop him by grabbing the back of his uniform, what's the point?

"Yeah, we didn't know, sorry" a few others apologize as well but it's easy to see that they don't mean it, they just say that because they were caught and they don't want to have to deal with an angry In-yeop, his alpha wolf makes their omega wolves whimper while the betas simply know better than to stay on his bad side.

"It's okay, just drop it" I mumble to him before forcing myself to walk inside and in the corner of the room, In-yeop follows close behind before sitting next to me in a way that hides me from most eyes, everyone looks away when they meet his glare.

I swallow thickly and try to keep my feet standing on the tip of my toes so that my thighs appear smaller, except that it doesn't help, I clench my fingers and use them instead to cover what I can, I really don't feel so good.

Dal comes back quickly along with a few other coworkers who are late and then sits at my other side just as our manager enters the room and from there, it all happens very fast.

In-yeop and Dal are sent to wash the bathrooms in the four first floors, Hanna and Bee are sent to wash the windows, Sophie is sent to the cafeteria, it keeps going like that with people dispatched to different floors and tasks until a few remain, me included.

"Now, I would like to have a volunteer for taking care of the CEO's floor".

We all tense up at the manager's words because it's well known that the CEO is very picky and difficult, many people who haven't cleaned his office properly have lost their job, it's quite literally like playing the lottery, whether you leave jobless or not with him.

But that also means being alone while cleaning because the CEO is almost never here, it should be fine, right?

So I raise my hand slowly, Dal gasps and tries to make me lower it but I really need some time away from wandering eyes, they've had fun at my expense enough for today. "I'll do it, I'll volunteer".

The manager nods before writing my name on the board next to the CEO's floor and... that's it, my fate is sealed.

"Thank you, Y/N, very nice of you. The others will wash the floors on all the other floors, you may go".

Everyone stands up to get started right away and I do the same, except that a hand on my shoulder has me stopping, coffee and bubblegum clearly unhappy with my decision.

"Y/N, why did you volunteer? You know what happens to most people taking care of the CEO's floor, do you want to lose your job?" In-yeop asks me in disbelief, he didn't see that one coming at all, nor did Dal, I usually stay on the safe side as much as possible.

I sigh and free myself from his hold. "Would it really be such a bad thing? And anyway, that's the last of my concern right now, I just want to be alone today, you heard them laugh, there's no way they didn't know these clothes were mine, I just feel so humiliated, In-yeop, Dal, I don't want to be near them" I tell the two men who frown, my whipped cream is always melting when I'm here, they hate that.

"They're all assholes, Y/N, don't let their words get to you" the alpha tries but that's easier said than done, I nod in a dismissing manner before pulling my arm out of Dal's hands to walk to the door.

"I'll be fine, don't worry. I'll do my best to not lose my job, I can't afford it. I'll see you guys later" I tell them before going to the storage room to grab my cleaning materials, everything settled on a janitor cart before I make my way to the private elevator that leads straight to the big boss' floor.

I guess we find out today if cleaning really is a job for me or not.

I step inside and use the special access card to gain permission for his floor and when the doors close, I briefly see the two wolves waving slowly at me with a dejected face before they're gone behind the reflective material.

I huff to myself as it starts going up, am I dying? Sure, my self-confidence is in pieces right now, I feel like shit but as far as I know, I'm not dead. What risks killing me more than words right now is this elevator suddenly dropping without restraints while I'm inside.

I grip onto the handle of the cart, great, Y/N, that was a nice thought to have, good job.

I look up to see that we're on the eighth floor, just two more and we're there but it's suddenly not fast enough, really not fast enough. It's one war after the other, there's no break possible for me, I'm attacked no matter where I go or what I do.

When the doors open, I quickly step out of the elevator and take a look at the hall welcoming me since it's my first time here. It's very simple, a few plants here and there on the black marble floor with large windows that give a nice view of the Han river, he gets to see that whenever he's here? How lucky.

I keep advancing to enter the office behind the black door at the end of the hall and what I see upon pushing it open is a darker, more monotone room, some more plants covering a few surfaces but not that many since most of the curtains covering the windows are currently shut, maybe they're fake ones?

I keep looking around me and find nearby his private bathroom, it's definitely a lot more luxurious than what I'm used to seeing and it's also already sparkling clean if not for the mirror that would need some wiping, I guess he came by yesterday.

Getting ready on my tasks helps me focus about something else than the very deep scar that burns within me, one that never has time to heal because there's always someone to throw a knife in the open wound when I least expect it, I guess what they say about cleaning being therapeutic is true, plus I get paid for it, I can't really complain.

Now, today might cost me my job but hey, at least I'll have had a free therapy sessions in this beautiful office, because while it is dark, there's also something warm about it, is it the scent? I'm not sure where I smelled that before but it's comforting, it helps.

It's with that in mind that I start with dusting the surfaces carefully before using the broom on the floor, eyes on the lookout for anything that shouldn't be there, my past serves me well on that one, something I won't complain about at this very moment.

I became obsessed with the smallest details because of my ex-husband, because if I wasn't careful enough, he would point out every single things I forgot and then he would make me feel bad about it.

"I work all day long to provide for you, the least you could do is clean the house well! I take care of the rent, the food, everything you could need and what do you do in return? You lounge around and eat all the goddamn food!".

That's all he saw out of me, someone lazy. The toilet isn't wiped properly, you forgot the shower, the trash can isn't empty, there are dishes in the sink, why is this on the table? Can't you clean this properly?

His vision of a perfect home was one in which it looks like no one lives, I couldn't possibly do that when I would stay at home all day long, how was I supposed to exist while also making it seem like I wasn't?

Honestly, now that I have some distance with this past of mine, I can see that I was simply convenient in his life, I was simply there at the right timing.

He'd tell all our friends that if I hadn't appeared when I did, he would've gotten in bed with the first girl walking up to him. His way of telling our romantic union was to say that I kept him from sinning, the worst thing to exist in his mind.

That's why we married. I was convenient because I loved him first. I was convenient because he saw in me someone who wanted to please, not knowing that if he squeezes the fragile clay too much, it can break.

He never told anyone he married me for love because he didn't, he married me because then he could finally have a body ready to be used by him only. Our honeymoon was trash because I realized once in his bed that I wasn't ready and he wouldn't have that happening, not when he could finally get what he wanted all this time.

So what did he do? He forced me, he begged and pleaded and whined and got angry, and then he had me and I started getting afraid of these moments with him, and then I started getting scared of him approaching me, and then I started getting scared of him coming back home.

I hated that the most, always being on edge in the one place that should've felt safe for me, because I never knew when he would come back from work, and when he did, I never knew what he would say, what he would find not to his liking.

And when he would approach me, I started not knowing anymore what he would ask of me, was it only a hug, a touch? Or did he want me in the bed at his mercy?

I fill the bucket with warm water to clean the floor, head lost in memories that throw me back in emotions that nearly brought me to my end two years ago.

I mop the floor remembering all those times when he would negotiate with me after I'd tell him that I couldn't give him anything that night, that I really couldn't because the simple touch of his fingers on my skin would make my heart clench in discomfort.

But to him, what I felt didn't matter, it was always about him. His way of being considerate was as such - give me what I need and I'll give you the space you need after. Do what you don't want to do and I'll give you what you asked for once I've had my fill.

It was wrong, so very wrong, but just to get his hands off me for the rest of the night, I would agree, I would suffer willingly knowing that after that, I'd have a moment of peace, even if it meant spending it with a broken soul.

I mop the floor remembering the nights I remained awake sleeping on the couch of the living room so I could be away from him while he'd sleep in the bed. He never complained about it and now I know that it's because he didn't need me by his side, he just needed my body when his hormones would suddenly rise and swallow his mind.

I mop the floor remembering when he would stare at me after I started gaining weight, like I was slowly losing my worth, like he was now doing me a favor by continuing to desire me.

The only things out of this that he enjoyed were the bigger boobs, the bigger butt, but that added to my pain, I hated when he would grope me out of nowhere whenever I'd walk past him. It caused me to start covering myself up with my arms when I would have to go near him, he simply found it funny but I was on edge every single times.

I spent a marriage having my body attacked by lust and my self-worth muffled behind thick walls, and now that I'm out of this, now that I'm finally living a life of my own, now that I can finally rest at home, I have to live something similar to my marriage again, but this time at work.

Sometimes it's easier to bear and I get to work with a smile on my face, other times I work while feeling like crying, because even though I've survived until now, even though I made it out of my painful past, it follows me everywhere I go.

I still have arguments with my ex haunting me before I go to sleep, arguments we'd have often about why he couldn't simply respect me when I'd tell him that he was hurting me, I can still remember word for word what he would answer, the ways he would dismiss my tears and the emotions are as vivid as they were then, except that this time, I'm alone in bed.

There's no running away, there's only walking forward with chains heavy at my feet.

And it hurts, it still fucking hurts and I'm tired of being in pain, I'm tired of my mind being lost between the past and the present, it goes and comes as it pleases, it's a wanderer, it freely goes wherever the wind carries it and it lands more often in fire than it does on the grass.

I notice a little stain on the floor and my brain latches onto it, stain, there's a stain, it needs to go.

And so I use the mop on it until it goes, except it doesn't.

I grab the scrub brush and use my hand to try and get rid of it, except it doesn't go.

I take a stronger product, I spray the floor and I try again until my arm hurts, until my knees hurt, my wrist screaming at me that it's in pain but the stain, it needs to go, why won't it go?

A lump forms in my throat, tears clinging to my lashes because fuck, why is it not working? It's frustrating, I was already feeling sensitive but this- this is making it so much worse, why can I not get rid of it?

I don't know how long I scrub it off for but when I wipe the foam with a cloth to see it still intact, I groan and throw the brush away before sobbing into my arm as I sit up against the nearby wall, my patience gone, it's all gone.

I feel awful, it's like having a swarm of bugs flying in my soul, they blur everything and they're annoying, they're so fucking annoying because they poke everything, they touch everything and they bounce on surfaces and they're loud but you can't get rid of them and it becomes overwhelming, unbearable.

The pressure in my chest increases exponentially and when I start crying, it quickly becomes wailing, painful wailing as my heart splits in half, my senses buzzing and dimming as all I can focus on is my hurt, because I'm so tired, so tired.

Why can't I enjoy life the way I want to enjoy it? Why is there always darkness hiding in my light? Why does it always manage to swallow my sun to throw me in darkness?

If only it was something I could fix, I would do so in a heartbeat but I am powerless and exhausted and there's no one to help me through it.

I don't notice right away when someone sits next to me, I don't notice right away the scent that wraps around me, but I do notice the hand that settles on my head to caress softly and I look up in shock, my surroundings a blur as the tears keep falling, my crying giving place to breathless sobs, who's there?

"What happened for you to cry that much, little omega? Why are you in pain?".

I can't replace the masculine voice, not in my state but his words melt into my soul and when my sobs merge into cries again, a hand pulls me to a chest before arms wrap around me and his scent fills my nose, soothing and comforting as I let it all out in his warmth.

Is this what crying in someone's arms feels like? Was it always supposed to feel so safe? I usually hate feeling someone touch me when I reach this state but right now, I feel like I would sob even harder if the arms holding me were to let go.

"That's right, let it all out, don't keep it in, little omega" the voice coos softly, arms tight around me through all of it, they don't let go even when I start calming down slightly, eyes shut and lids heavy.

The weekend is catching up to me, I didn't sleep much and it shows when a veil slowly covers my mind to bring shadow to my soul, I have no strength left to fight it when I start sagging in the arms holding me with a sigh of exhaustion.

I feel a softness press to my hair before his voice speaks up again.

"You can sleep, little one, you're safe here".

And I do, because indeed, it feels safe, so safe.