Years of Pain

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Dazai looked at Chuuya shocked. "Mine...?" Dazai said softly, so softly Chuuya barely heard him.

Chuuya nodded. "Yes... He is yours..."

"When? When did you know you were pregnant?"

"...When everything with the Guild was going on... that night I used corruption... I found out two days before that I was pregnant..." Chuuya said softly.

Dazai chuckled angrily. "Are you crazy?! You could have gotten hurt! They could have killed you and my son!"

"But I didn't get hurt! I'm fine and Rei is okay. And since when do you care how much pain I am in?! You used me any chance you got."

"You know what. Yeah, I admit I was a dick when I was in the mafia. I made mistakes. I took advantage of you. Emotionally and physically. And I shouldn't have and for that I am deeply sorry Chuuya, I am and I have changed. I left because I knew I could not be the man you needed me to be. But I am now. And I don't think it's fair to be denied the right to know about my son just because of our differences."

Chuuya sighed. "I am not denying you the right... I wanted to tell you about Rei... but I was afraid. I was scared you'd walk out on him one day like you did me and I didn't want to see him hurt."

"You didn't want to see him hurt or you couldn't deal with the pain of me possibly leaving you again?"

"I didn't want to see him hurt you dick! This isn't about me you selfish pig! I only have Rei's best interest at heart, and at the time keeping him from you was clearly best!"

"What did you just say?" Dazai walked up on Chuuya and Chuuya looked at him with a cold stare.

"You heard me. Keeping him from you was a good decision at the time."

Dazai grabbed Chuuya's arm harshly. "I am his father he should know about me!"

"Get your hand off of me right now!" Chuuya said tugging away and Dazai pulled him closer.

"No. Where is my son?!"

"With someone who actually loves him and was there for me!"

Dazai looked at Chuuya coldly.

"What? Go ahead and hit me. I know you want to, better yet. I dare you. I am not that same person I was 4 years ago." Chuuya shoved Dazai away making him let go of his arm. "If you ever lay your hand on me again in that manner I'll fucking kill you. Now move out of my way."

Chuuya said as he pushed Dazai out of the way, and Dazai caught his wrist. "You can't-" Chuuya turned around and punched Dazai in the face sending him flying across the apartment walk way. Dazai smashed into the rail.

"I told you not to touch me! Why can't you just leave me alone?! Why?! Ha?! Why?! You always show up and ruin everything! You've always been selfish! So inconsiderate to how I feel! I still remember you slamming my face into the damn walls! Using me as a punching bag when you got drunk and angry! I remember the nights you where touching me and whispering those sweet nothings in my ear that was clear bullshit because I always knew you were with someone before me! I hate you! I hate what you've made me become!" The ground started cracking viciously under Chuuya's feet. His emotions where taking over his ability.

Dazai's eyes widened. "Chuuya... I... -"

"Shut up! Shut the fuck up! You always get to make yourself look like the victim! I am sick of it!" Chuuya was cracking the walls of the apartment building but suddenly his ability dissipated when he heard the cries of a child. The cries he was familiar with hearing. Chuuya felt little hands in his hair and he turned around seeing Fyodor and Rei. Chuuya just looked at them not saying a word. Fyodor didn't need him to. He knew. He knew from the moment Rei got agitated at home that Chuuya was in pain. Fyodor pulled Chuuya into his arms and Chuuya couldn't hold the tears back anymore. He sobbed softly onto Fyodor's shoulder, and Fyodor rubbed his fingers through Chuuya's hair and he kissed the top of his forehead.

"Shh... it's okay mon beau. Please don't cry... you know I hate when you do..."

Fyodor leaned back and he put his hand on Chuuya's cheek. Fyodor looked at Chuuya sadly, and he wiped his tears away. "Why don't you go back inside the house? I don't think today is a good day for you to go back."

Chuuya nodded as he sniffled. Chuuya took Rei from Fyodor and he walked back into his apartment closing the door behind him. Fyodor looked at Dazai and he walked over to him.

"So, you are Dazai Osamu?"

Dazai spit blood from his mouth chuckling. "Yeah what of it?"

"Fair warning Mister Osamu, stay away from Chuuya and Rei. They do not need you. And frankly your presence here today has made him very upset. It's best you do keep your distance, because if Chuuya gets hurt like that again..." Fyodor smirked. "I'll kill you myself."

Dazai chuckled standing up. "He's not your Chuuya and that baby is my son rather you like it or not, and I have a right to see my son."

"The son you didn't even want to take care of?" Fyodor said.

"The son I didn't even know about!"

"Your word against mine. And with your abusive past towards Chuuya, and with documentation of it at the Yokohama Police Department."

Dazai gritted his teeth.

"Oh... did I strike a nerve? Yeah, I know Dazai. I know that you forced yourself onto Chuuya when he was eighteen before you left. I know you beat the shit out of him to the point the neighbors finally got involved because they heard his agonizing screams. Just like this also isn't Chuuya's first time having a baby by you."

"What...?" Dazai eyes widened in shock.

"You were so drunk you probably don't remember but that night you beat Chuuya nearly to death and put him in the hospital. He was pregnant. And he was so disgusted by what you did he didn't want any painful part of you to remember, so he had an abortion."

"You're wrong. Chuuya would never-!"

"A broken heart can make anyone do something they never would do. Don't believe me go to the clinic yourself. Otome Clinic in Tsuzuki Ward. His file should still be there it hasn't been long enough for it to disappear."

"How do you..."

"Because I was there. I was a volunteer nurse. And the doctor I worked with gave Chuuya the abortion. Like I said don't believe me go ask for the file."

Fyodor said as he was walking away.

"And do take my warning seriously Mister Osamu. I wouldn't want to cause Chuuya any unnecessary pain." Fyodor said before he walked into the apartment shutting the door behind him.

Dazai stood in the hallway, his hands balled into fists, his body trembling. He knew it was stupid, Fyodor was just probably trying to rile him up. But he had to know. He had to find out. No matter how crazy it seemed. 

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