Chapter 64

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Finn took Lena's hand and escorted her to the dry porch of the wooden cabin. They stood facing the rushing water. Like waterfalls, it bordered them and connected the roof and grass with streams of a blur. A thunderbolt quaked the grounds and continued to grumble and growl.

Still grinning unrestrainedly, Finn could finally collect his thoughts and complete the question he had begun two long minutes ago.

"Are you alright?"

Lena answered, but words did not depart her mouth. She hugged Finn, hearing his pulse accelerate as she placed her ear against his chest and snaked her arms around his back. He hugged her back, his chin resting gently on her head.

"Can I ask you something?" she said softly.

"Yes. Of course."

"Which planet do you like the most?"

Finn's mind stumbled as it tried to move his thoughts to the memories he had made on Pluviam, Boreas, and Kepler. Images of Demeter popped into his head as well. He remembered stargazing on the roof with Lena. He remembered getting to know her at the waterfalls when they played a game of truths. All night they had talked about everything and nothing. He could see the blue fireflies in his mind, and the heedless walk through the unknown. He could hear their voices playing in his head, making promises to each other. It all came back to him.

With Lena in his arms, Finn did not think about the time he had to carry her as she was dying from poisonous berries, or how he found the treehouse deserted after she had been taken by Arrakis.

Finn remembered them finding each other on Boreas. Sitting by the fire, reading a tale, and falling asleep to the songs of Thrake's howling winds.

With the essence of love upon his lips, Finn did not think about Lena drowning in the ocean, or the blood that was shed when his father stopped his execution. Finn thought about titters and teasers and forgot all about the tears and tragedies.

With Lena's head against his chest, he could think of nothing bad. Positivity, hope, and aspiration took over his conscious until he had to consider Kepler. He remembered their fall from the sky and how they got back up on their feet, even when gravity tried to push them down with its forces. He thought about their crouched run, drawing breaths in sharp gasps as they scurried through the city at midnight. He remembered how they were nervous. How they got caught and were saved by a stranger. How they walked to the graveyard together and had to flee once again not an hour later. From his own home. A place he had always seen as a sanctuary had become the center of danger. The goods and bads were all there, and yet, not one unpleasant thought crossed Finn's mind. Because on Kepler, Lena had always been there with him.

Finn tilted his head slightly as he backed away to meet her eyes.

"I could not give an accurate answer to that question. I see myself fit for no planet by the simple variable of its plain existence." He shook his head lightly. "Only if you are there to create and share each memory with me can I candidly call a place favorable."

Lena was smiling with felicity and returned her head to Finn's chest. "That answer will do."

The rain subsided when they entered the cabin. Its door had a broken lock and no one knew the location of its associated key. It's interior consisted of a single small room with a dusty fireplace at one wall and shattered windows on another. Along the floor, weeds were growing through gaps between the moist planks. Every step caused the wood to squeak.

There stood three chairs with books stacked on top of one, their pages rather brown than white, all around an ancient table with stuff scattered upon it; boxes and baskets with rusty tools, broken mason glasses, dried out paint, useless twines and bleached bundles of fine strings covered its entire surface along with other arbitrary items.

On one wall hung a canvas, its colors too faded to make out the artwork. A mushroom-colored sofa chair, with metal springs poking out and its cushion looking half-eaten, had its place in a corner, and some bent nails and loose bricks were dispersed on the ground in the company of dead insects and spiderwebs.

"This certainly feels like home," said Lena casually. It took Finn a second to understand her hint at Pluviam.

"We'll make it your home," he said, watching her walk over the creaking floorboard.

He imagined cleaning the floors and furniture, repairing the door, and adding new glass to the window frames.

"How did you find this place?" she asked, attracted by the rubbish on the table. "And who did it belong to?"

"We don't know who lived here before. It's very old. There's a lot of mysterious junk from the past centuries in the forests."

"Why didn't I see any of it two days ago?"

"You have to know where to find the ruins. I should take you one day. I think you'd like to see that old stuff."

"Like a museum! I can't wait to see it." His chuckled pulled her eyes toward him. "What?"

"Nothing." He tried but could not suppress his grin. "It's just—you know, others would call it a junkyard. And you—well—you call it a museum. You make it something pretty. I really like that about you."

Lena blushed faintly and turned her smile away from him. Her fingers wiped the window ledge of dust. She could see the edge of the cliff, but everything behind it was as white as Thrake's snow. She couldn't tell whether it was a cloud, fog, or the sky itself.

"So, tell me the story. How did you find this secret cabin?"

"It's not a very happy story," answered Finn.

"Are you sure? Whatever happened, we wouldn't be standing here right now, if it wasn't for your discovery."

Finn's head was spinning. The truth was found in her words. The cabin was where his journey had begun.

    "That's fair. I'll tell you." Like the dust from the ledge, Finn wiped his memory of the painful events he repressed. "I was nine. It was winter. More than a year had passed since Levi's funeral, and I didn't seem to be recovering from the shock. People kept telling me it'd be alright. How many times was I told that time heals all wounds? I couldn't stand it. They didn't know how much more it hurt hearing those words. A year had passed and I was the only one to know how little of the pain had gone away. Time healed nothing for me.

On that winter day, my father and I were arguing. He said I have to better myself at school, or I'd fail my classes. I felt very misunderstood and Blake seemed to be the only one not to tell me what to do. Probably because he was just a child himself. We made our way up his street. We had never gone there because citizens don't usually leave the city. Especially not two unauthorized kids. I said to Blake that I was running away and he wanted to come with me."

    Lena lost her eyes in the white of the view as she was listening to Finn. She imagined the bright nothingness to be the snow of that wintry day.

    "It felt to us as if we had been walking for days when it had only been a few hours. It was snowing quite severely, and I think we were lost in the woods. We kept walking and found this place when we perished from the cold and couldn't feel our toes. We didn't care if someone would be here. The door was unlocked and we just walked in. We were freezing. I remember how vibrant my teeth were chattering. One look at this place and we knew it had been vacated. I thought I could stay here, make it my home."

    "What made you go back?"

    "Weakness. I think. I couldn't stay here. I had nothing."

    "I don't think it was weakness." Lena looked over her shoulder and lifted the corner of her mouth lovingly. "You must have been very strong to go back, knowing how hard it would be to face the emotions and memories."

    "It's interesting how you introduce me to my own life as if it were something new. Something good."

    "Is it not? Can it not be difficult and good at the same time?"

    "It can be." Finn smiled.

    "The majority of good memories were sculpted from the most difficult moments. It's how you became best friends with Blake. You found this unique place. You met me."

He nodded. How right she was.

"Yes. I dare say that all the pain I've suffered was necessary to make me understand what it means to sacrifice and appreciate. If I had to relive every overmastering moment of my life, so that I can end up here again with you, I'd do it blindfolded."

The rain was still tapping the roof like many little fingers. Notwithstanding, a warm light joined through the windows and filled the room with something angelic. The sun was coming out to play.

Finn had a cordial expression. "This is perfect. Follow me, you have to see this!"

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