❛ SURVIVOR'S HEART ! ❜
chapter thirty-nine ―― round in circles

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ EVERYONE, except for the younger members of the group – Carl, Beth, and Jimmy – gathered in the living room to discuss what they thought was the best way to handle the Randall situation. Charlie sat in one of the chairs and Josh sat in front of her, his body between her legs and his head resting on her thigh. She smiled a little at the back of his head, she loved that he always wanted to be close to her, to touch her in even the smallest of ways. She'd never had that before. She leaned forward a little as everyone got comfortable, either sitting or standing around the room, and she kissed the top of his head before leaning back in her chair.

"So, how do we do this?" Glenn asked. "Just take a vote?"

"Does it have to be unanimous?" Andrea looked over at Rick.

"How about majority rules?" Lori suggested.

"Well, let's-let's just see where everybody stands, then we can talk through the options." The leader of the group told them, but Charlie could see that even he didn't really know how to go about this whole thing.

"Well," Shane started. "Where I sit, there's only one way to move forward."

"Killing him." Dale jumped in. "Right?" He glanced around the room at everyone. "I mean, why even bother to take a vote? It's clear which way the wind's blowing."

"Well, if people believe we should spare him, I wanna know." Rick told him.

"Well, I can tell you it's a small group – maybe just me and Glenn." He looked over at the Korean boy, who looked up and Dale's face fell at the look on the boy's face.

"Look, I-I think you're pretty much right about everything, all the time, but this-"

"They've got you scared."

"He's not one of us." Glenn argued. "And we've-we've lost too many people already."

"And we aren't risking anymore of us." Charlie added, looking up at the old man.

"I know where you stand." Dale narrowed his eyes at her and she took a breath as she looked down at Josh as he tilted his head back to look up at her. Dale looked around the room, his eyes settling on Maggie who stood next to her father, who was sitting on the couch. "How about you? Do you agree with this?"

She hesitated a moment before looking over at Rick, "Couldn't we continue keeping him prisoner?"

"Just another mouth to feed." Daryl added from his spot where he was leaning against the wall and Charlie glanced over at him – she hadn't really seen him much since their talk on the rv a few weeks ago. He had been distancing himself from the group, or at least it seemed that way.

"It may be a lean winter." Herasel told them.

"We could ration better." Lori suggested.

"Well, he could be an asset." Dale insisted. "Give him a chance to prove himself."

"Put him to work?" Glenn questioned.

"We're not letting him walk around." Rick countered.

"Definitely wouldn't be comfortable with that." Charlie shook her head and Josh rubbed his hand up and down her calf as a sort of comfort and she let out a small sigh.

"We could put an escort on him." Maggie offered.

"Who wants to volunteer for that duty?" Shane quipped.

"I will." Dale stated.

Rick held up his hand, stopping the two. "I don't think any of us should be walking around with this guy."

"He's right." Lori agreed. "I wouldn't feel safe unless he was tied up."

"We can't exactly put chains around his ankles, sentence him to hard labor." Andrea looked around the room, her arms crossed over her chest.

"Look, say we let him join us, right?" Shane started. "Maybe he's helpful, maybe he's nice. We let our guard down and maybe he runs off, brings back his thirty men."

Dale scoffed lightly. "So the answer is to kill him to prevent a crime that he may never even attempt? If we do this, we're saying there's no hope. Rule of law is dead, there is no civilization."

"Look around, Dale." Mason sighed from where he sat on the floor, his back against the wall and his eyes closed as he leaned his head back. "There is no civilization anymore." The room was quiet for a moment, Charlie looked over at her best friend and though she agreed with him, it was weird to see him so . . . hopeless. He had always been the optimistic one, he always saw the bright side of things but things changed. The world changed and she knew, as much as he still seemed like the same go-lucky boy, that he had changed, too.

"Could you drive him farther out?" Hershel suggested. "Leave him like you planned?"

"You barely came back this time." Lori shook her head, looking over at her husband. "There are walkers, you could break down. You could get lost."

"Or get ambushed." Daryl added.

"They're right. We should not put our own people at risk." Glenn agreed.

"If you go through with it, how would you do it?" Patircia asked. "Would he suffer?"

"Morbid." Charlie muttered under her breath, leaning forward and wrapping her arms around Josh's shoulders – she didn't like that they were discussing someone's murder like it was a completely normal thing to do. No matter how messed up the world had gotten, and despite the fact that killing Randall meant that her people – her family – were safe, the topic made her stomach churn.

"We could hang him, right?" Shane looked over at Rick, his eyes briefly landing on Charlie and Josh as the boy reached his hand up and placed his on the girl's arm. "Just snap his neck."

"I thought about that." Rick sighed. "Shooting may be more humane."

"What about the body?" T-Dog asked. "Do we bury him?"

"Hold-hold-hold on!" Dale cut him off, waving his arms in the air a little. "You're talking about this like it's already decided."

"You've been talking all day, going round in circles." Daryl told him, pushing himself off the wall. "You just wanna go around in circles again?"

"This is a young man's life!" Dale shouted. "And it is worth more than a five-minute conversation! Is this what it's come to? We kill someone because we can't decide what else to do with him?" He looked over at Rick. "You saved him and now look at us. He's been tortured. He's gonna be executed. How are we any better than those people that we're so afraid of?"

It fell quiet in the room, everyone exchanging glances, letting what Dale had said sink in. Charlie tucked her face into Josh's neck, tightening her arms around him. She was scared she was turning into Shane, shoot first and think about it never. Like she had somehow become this person that was okay with murdering a boy just because there was a possibility he could hurt the only people in the world that she cared about. She felt like she had at the C.D.C when she jumped at Jenner with her knife raised and every intention of hurting him because he had tried to take her and everyone she loved out with him.

"We all know what needs to be done." Shane stated.

"No, Dale is right." Rick shook his head. "We can't leave any stone unturned here. We have a responsibility–"

"So what's the other solution?" Andrea cut him off.

"Let Rick finish." Lori told the blonde but she continued.

"We haven't come up with a single viable option yet. I wish we could-"

"So let's work on it!" Dale shouted.

"We are!" Rick argued.

"Stop it." Carol cut in, stopping the two. "Just stop it. I'm sick of everybody arguing and fighting. I didn't ask for this. You can't ask us to decide something like this." She looked between Shane and Rick. "Please decide – either of you, both of you – but leave me out."

"How can you ask them not to make you decide this, but you ask them to?" Charlie sat up, looking over at the woman. "You think they want to decide something like this anymore then you do? I mean, Shane's been a real dick – sorry, Hershal, won't happen again." She looked over at the old man, knowing that he didn't like cussing in his house, and he just nodded. "And he's done some massively questionable things, but do you really think he wants this on his hands? He's a cop – was a cop – and every time he came home after he had to put someone down on the job I could tell that it was eating away at him. He never wanted to kill anyone, that's not why he became a cop, he wanted to help people. Save people.

"And, Rick? He's probably the most moral guy I know. So you have no right to put this on either of them. You have no right to make them decide this because you don't want to, because it's too much. You didn't ask for this, you think they did? You think any of us did? No, we're all just doing the best we can with the hand we've been dealt – some better than others." She glanced over at Shane and he rolled his eyes, but he couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips because she had defended him. "Don't put this on them. We're a family, we're in this together. We should all have a say."

"And what do you think we should do?" Dale asked, a bite in his tone and the girl turned to him. "Because earlier you were all for shootin' him in the head yourself." Josh narrowed his eyes at the man, his lips parting to defend Charlie but someone beat him to it.

"Watch it, old man." Daryl warned, glaring at Dale with his arms crossed over his chest.

"All right, that's enough." Rick held a hand up, stopping them. "Anybody wants the floor before we make a final decision has the chance." He told them, looking around the room and both Paricta and Maggie sat down, no one said a word and Josh squeezed Charlie's hand. She squeezed back but turned to look over at Daryl, nodding her head a little in thanks and he returned it.

"You once said that we don't kill the living." Dale broke the silence.

"Well, that was before the living tried to kill us." Rick countered.

"But don't you see? If we do this, the people that we were – the world that we knew is dead. And this new world is ugly. It's. . . harsh. It's survival of the fittest. And that's a world I don't want to live in. And I don't believe any of you do. I can't." Dale ranted. "Please. Let's just do what's right."

"We may not want it, but that's what we got." Josh told him, squeezing Charlie's hand again. "The world's not the same, we're not the same."

"That's what you think?" Dale asked the boy.

"That's what I know."

"Then I feel sorry for you." The older man mumbled before looking around the room. "Is there anybody else who's gonna stand with me?" He nearly begged.

"He's right." Andrea nodded her head. "We should try to find another way."

"Anybody else?" Rick asked, looking around but on one said anything.

"Are y'all gonna watch too?" Dale scoffed, tears in his eyes. "No, you'll go hide your heads in your tents and try to forget that we're slaughtering a human being." He shook his head. "I won't be a party to it." He started towards the door, stopping next to Daryl. "This group is broken." He told him before he left. Charlie pushed herself up, holding her hand out to Josh and she pulled as he pushed himself up then the two left the house. Making their way across the field towards the trees they used as target practice.

"You okay?" Josh asked, wrapping his arms around Charlie as he leaned against the tree – the girl sat between his legs, her body turned sideways and her legs bent over his right leg. She closed her eyes as she leaned against him, her head on his shoulder.

"No." She mumbled and he tightened his arms around her, not saying a word and he held her to him, holding her as a broken sob shook her body.

NOVA SPEAKS !

missed yesterday's update because i
was cleaning my room after weeks
of it being a mess and i was always
trying to get my twilight fic published!!

it's called let down if anyone wants to read it!!!

and i also had physical therapy.

anyways, here's this chapter!! the end is getting closer!!

what do y'all think of the story so far? or the characters?? i would really love to hear some feedback!!