song:
Kiss it better by Rihana

I'M HYPERVENTILATING as I tuck myself underneath the bed to block out the words spoken by Rebecca. I know she isn't real, my body knows too, especially my fingers but all I see is her standing in front of me with that typical cruel smile and a belt in her left hand.

My bandaged leg is sprawled across its side as I put my hand on my mouth to not let the imaginary figure find me.

"Caterina." She whistles, her one ankle crooked, I remember shooting her and when she fell, her ankle got twisted as she dropped from the stairs.

"Caterina, where are you? I know you are hiding from me, now be a good girl and come out." I close my eyes thinking about a certain unique flower I treasured before Rebecca tarnished it under her heel.

I can imagine her limping and it looks like she is deliberately taking her sweet time to take in the environment, smell the faded emotion, and touch the present world.

When I don't hear any sound, I slowly open my eyes only to scream as her bloodied face appears right in front of me.

She gives out a sinister chuckle. "Caught you." Her violet eyes glisten in pure malice. "What did you think? Your mother won't catch her daughter? It's quite a shame you are giving me." She tsks. With a sudden hold on my hair, she grabs a fistful of it and tugs hard enough to make me look at her with painful eyes.

The first time she pulled my hair, I screamed. Then the second and later on, I cried. But after repeated actions, I stopped allowing myself to feel, except my eyes do.

My eyes remain a piece of expressive jewelry I love to wear cause it reminds me of something inside me residing as a human. A human with feelings, that can get broken and repaired.

She drags my wounded leg to pull me out of my secret chamber. She tsks while saying, "I always thought you'll be a clever daughter making me proud of you," she turns back with the same psychotic smile, "But I guess you need punishment to understand everything."

I know where she is dragging me so I fought harder than before but who can fight against a ghost? Yet, my vision rejects the dysfunctional thoughts.

"Please leave me." I sob after so many years. The same look I gave when I was a child. My white gown gets dirtier the harsher manner she pulls me.

Her laughter booms in the narrow passage as my skin gets scratched by the rough pavement. Like the child I was before, I shout for help even though I and her ghost know well enough there will be no one to save me from her, not even myself.

↓

THE SOUND OF screams pulls me out of my groggy mindset. I didn't have any meal for tonight trying to find out why I turned into a heavy sleeper suddenly.

I quickly pull out a knife and a torch and start my walk to the source barefoot.

For a second I thought of alerting Caterina but the way she was somehow giving me sleeping pills in juice forced me to tackle the situation by myself. I stumble across trails of water that look like someone limping and going.

The prints land in the same chamber I told Caterina. I found a huge wardrobe. The sound is still coming from behind the door, even the water traces are in front of the wardrobe. I open it to find racks of worn-out clothes settled in them. My brows furrowed and just when I stepped inside the space to push the racks to find any hidden chamber, the floor suddenly turned into an elevator dragging me down with a swift speed.

Within ten seconds, I reached the staircase. The same structure I found at that time when I tried to show Caterina. The torch illuminates light in the corridors I walk by.

The bleak sound of whoosh comes from the main hall, a hall that I somehow feel familiar with. My foot halts when I suddenly realize that it's the same structure Caterina had in her earlier castle which also means she is representing it as a token of her amazing memory or to manipulate someone like me. So, she was right about what she said earlier.

My fist curls as I stride to open the door of the main hall that goes into the underground dungeon. I weave the knife between my fingers figuring by stabbing her in multiple ways than one.

With one final step, I reach down and just when I am about to scold Caterina for tormenting any innocent, shock resonates all through my body. Goosebumps rise in my body finding something I never thought I would see.

There she is, in a sitting position but with her wounded leg stretched out, whipping her back lashes after lashes producing red lines with blood pouring out of her beautiful tan skin.

"Caterina," I whisper hoarsely but she doesn't listen. Her back is in front of me so I have to walk into the cabin to meet her eyes.

When I reach in front of her, I again whisper, "Caterina."

Her violet eyes don't show any life as if it's all suck out of her. She speaks brokenly but not to me. "I am sorry, mumma. I am sorry."

My breath hitches, she is suffering from schizophrenia and I threw out its curing tablets thinking some rascal put it in my bag. But now I want to jerk her back into reality. I clear my throat, "Caterina, it's me, Aristide."

But she doesn't listen. She is completely and utterly lost in her world. A world where imagination is her reality.

Tears pour from her eyes. "I am of no good. I am sorry, mumma. I promise I will never do it again. I promise, mumma, I promise." Just when I am about to interrupt her. She nods her head bowing down. "I should have died."

Somehow her silent words broke the record system of my heart. The slow and steady rate is now faster, it wants to show her it chooses her, it needs her like the droplets of blood pouring in and out of its system.

I shake her shoulder to drop down the leash. Instead, she gives herself a brutal hit backside. "You're always right, mumma, I am of no good. I must die."

Tears now flow from my eyes of how much she may have endured during her period. I want to hug her, cherish her, and tell her she isn't alone. A newfound determination arrived Instead of restriction, I opted to give her love. Show her how much I mean to her and let her open the door of love.

So, to distract her and to pull her away from the situation she is currently living in. I kneel in front of her holding the leash tightly dropping it away from her reach and kiss her without any second thought.

Lavender.

She is my lavender.

The smell of lavender in her body somehow became my toxic trait to keep it all together myself and inhale it whenever I want closure from her.

Heaven.

That's where I currently reside along with my Hell.

Her soft pink lips parted as I put individual kisses on both her upper and lower ones. She is momentarily shocked at the situation.

A shock is much better than a fictional world.

I pull back taking my pleasure insight. Her eyes now dialet light and I smile. "Welcome back, Caterina."

↓

I AM LOOKING down in full embarrassment as he washes my sweaty hair with the lavender fragrance he inhales now and then complementing the owner who made it, coursing jealousy to the female who is getting all his side of attention where I too am present.

I hold the border of the tub forcing myself to appear steady and calm. Somehow he dabs the back side too deeply pouring out cusses from my mouth.

"Sorry." He mutters but what shocks me is he starts blowing air on my skin, creating goosebumps all around my tissues. I shudder pulling my knees together and shaking slightly.

"Where is the guy who said he will always hate me?" I mumble.

He halts his work but I don't turn back to look at him knowing that he is somehow behind the reduction of drug sales, burning of weapons and probably burning my haven.

"I still hate you." My heart cracks piece by piece as each letter of that particular word stabs me from every side.

I nod my head after some time. "You can go." My lips tremble but I bite to keep myself cool for a particular period.

"But I have to clean you-"

My glare targets him to keep him quiet. "Get. Out." I grit but when he doesn't, I rotate the knob that leads to the shower directly behind me as the water pours on my half-healed wounds.

His eyes widen. "What the fuck are you doing? You'll get hurt."

I smirk. "When did the FBI fall for his culprit?"

His nose flared, obsidian eyes narrow. "I won't fall for someone like you."

My smirk remains intact instead of my glass-breakable heart. "Good. You might want to see me die then by your hands, then."

"Yes."

There and then my first rejection seems impractical and worthless. I sigh, shaking my head as the pain soon seems unbearable to me, I stand in front of him naked and walk out, more like limp to my wardrobe drawing water traces to my destination.

"At least let me put a bandage around you." I don't say anything as I start drying my body and when it comes behind my back, with a deep breath I go for rubbing behind me knowing that the physical pain is much better than the emotional one.

"Caterina!" I don't even wince when the fabric touches the wound but I do find pleasure in watching him getting the reflection of my pain. He rushes to my side forcefully snatching from my hold and slowly dabbing behind and at the same time blowing.

He pushes me to sit down in my bed and brings the first aid box to wrap a bandage around my body with precise perfection.

After that, he greets me good night and walks out.

I sigh and think of taking a rest but after three hours without any drop of sleep, I walk to bring out the hidden sword and rush to Aristide's room. Finding it open, I peep inside and tip-toe to his side only to find him sleeping peacefully.

My heart pains to again fracture by killing another life that gave something equivalent to life to me. My brain already gave me the green signal to kill him yet my heart cries and I hate when I bear to become vulnerable.

With a deep sigh, I raise my sword high to kill the rare flower that bloomed behind my mother's watch but only for the flower to glow brighter.

He open his eyes and with calmness he speaks. "Hello, my Reaper. What service so you want?"

The loud clank loudly makes in the room where he patiently watches me. "Kiss me."

What is happening? Can someone please tell me?
However, this book has been finished two/three months earlier and consists of two parts.
I would like to name this series as Filthy duet:
1st part: Filthy Chaos
2nd part: Filthy Corruption
Now, I am kind of very sad and disappointed that you all are not voting. Do vote and comment kindly, please.