faree003  I love you😘
This chapter is for you. Thank you for the vote of confidence everytime I feel like giving up❤

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Rufaidah came back from Islamiyyah one Saturday afternoon visibly shaken and reeling from what their teacher told them in class. He spoke extensively about death and the torment of grave and eventually hell fire(Jahannam). She wonder why people are so forgetful and negligent, why we live as if we will never die, as if we don't have an inkling on what is to happen if we disobey Allah and die when He is displeased with us. Everything that is commanded to be done in Islam is for our own good, it makes us better, refined and civilized human beings. Anything that is prohibited is for our own good too, because not doing that thing no matter how tempting is better than doing it but we are heedless, we are arrogant, we try to mislead each other by making the laws flexible to our needs and what we think is right.

She knows that she is in no position to judge anyone herself because months back, she doesn't even pray, neither cover her beauty from non mahrams but she now know better and she made a vow to always strive hard to be better, to always follow the dictate of Islam, not her heart desires and definitely not what is trending in the society.

Deep in thoughts, she almost bump into the wall without noticing her surroundings,she is in a haste to go to her room, cry out her regrets of the years she wasted being angry at the world, taking no heed to Reedah's advice and the fear that had she died when Reedah does, she is definitely going to hell and nothing can save her, she has no excuse to give Allah because He test His servants with different calamities in whatever form He deems fit and ignorance is never an excuse even to those who weren't born Muslims but she was blessed to be born into Islam and had misused her chances of getting the best out of this world and the world beyond.

"Rufaidah what happened to you? Why are you looking so sad?" mommy cut her train of thoughts as she went into the kitchen to pick some fruits before going to her room.

"Uh uh nothing Ma. Good afternoon. What are you doing here?" She asked instead, evading her mother's question.

"Can't a woman go into her kitchen without being asked as to what she is doing?" She teased raising  a brow in question.

"Yeah, right. I forgot that the mistress of the house still knows how to cook" she jibed back raising her hands in surrender.

To Rufaidah's surprise, mommy followed her to her room with an inquisitive look and that of concern. Sighing in defeat, Rufaidah narrated everything that she heard in school to her mother amid hot blazing tears.

"Shhh come here dear, come here" Mommy engulfed her in a tight motherly embrace gently patting her back urging her to stop crying.

"No one is going to hell in shaa Allah, especially not you dear. I have been observing you for days and I know that you're a righteous being. You told me yourself that Allah is The Most Forgiving Most Merciful so why do you think you're an exception to His general rule?"

Rufaidah shook her head 'No'

"It is good to remind ourselves of Allah's wrath and the torment of hell fire in other to keep our imaan in check but it is equally important to remind ourselves of His Mercy and the Bounties of Jannah for the same reasons" She concluded, feeling a distinct heaviness in her chest,feeling like a hypocrite for not being a good muslimah herself. There and then she made a resolve to be better, she even considered joining the same school Rufaidah is going to because she is lacking in so many things and time has changed for her to be arrogant in seeking knowledge. But  most times, getting better is easier said than done.

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"Yahsalam! What if Daddy changed his mind and said no. Innalillahi wa Inna ilaihi rajiun. I didn't know him much that time but I was scared to lose him, now that I know the amazing being that he is, I think I'll die of sadness" Rufaidah rambled anxiously pacing Zubaidah's room.

It is her introduction/ betrothal/ wedding date fixing day all combined together. Mommy even told her that there's a chance Al'amin's family will come with the traditional wedding boxes. To avoid meeting her in laws she came to her uncle's house to hide which is obviously a bad idea.

Laughing so hard with tears in her eyes Zubaidah sighed dramatically, shaking Rufaidah back to her senses before handing her a glass of water " Drink this up, take a deep breath, lie down and sleep" She commanded.

"How can I sleep when my whole life is at stake? Are you even listening to what I was saying? What if he says no? What should I do to make him say yes? Will my life ever be the same again?" She jerked her hands from Zuby's wide eyed.

"Yah Allah! Where is everyone when I need them most? How can I drive some sense into your thick skull Rufs? If he is going to say no why will he tell them to come in the first place?daddy has changed, everything is good in your family remember?" She hit her head with her hands agitated.

"I know but what if...?" She couldn't even finish her sentence before Zubaidah shoved a large chunk of cake in her mouth shutting her up. she then picked her phone and dialed Yaya Sham's number.

"Assalamu alaikum bro. No time for pleasantries. Dan Girman Allah kazo ka dauki Rufaidah before she drives me nuts. She has been pacing this room for hours now saying rubbish and I tried my best to calm her down but it seems like I am escalating the issue" She rambled.

"Both of you need to calm down and I can't come because I am at work and in the middle of something, just hand over the phone to her" Zubaidah handed Rufaidah who is sending daggers her way the phone before leaving the room making sure to slam it with a loud bang. She never knew her cousin is this handful, she would've left her alone in the house and attend her group meeting even though it's boring but it will be better than being stuck with an anxious lady who has no reason to be anxious.

"Noor" he called her with the new nickname almost everyone call her with.

"Yes" she replied fidgeting with her hands.

"There's nothing to be anxious about okay? Whatever will be will be, besides you always pray to Allah for the best, His choice and something that has khair in it right? So hand over everything to Allah, relax, calm your nerves and pray as you always do. In shaa Allah, you will soon become one with Al'amin, everyone wants that for you. Just keep repeating lahaula wala quwwata illa billahil aliyil azeem and all those azhkars to calm you okay? I will meet you when am done" he didn't wait for her reply before cutting the call.

She tried to take deep breaths which obviously didn't work, she has never been this anxious about anything in her life. She finally decided to perform ablution and offer two units of prayers, maybe it will calm her. It actually worked and she even slept off on the praying mat where Zubaidah met her almost an hour later. She came bearing the good news that everything went well and her wedding date has been fixed in three months time. She smiled triumphantly feeling slightly jealous of Yaya Shams because whatever he told Rufaidah to do actually worked before quietly closing the door behind her.

It was dark already when Rufaidah woke up with a start mumbling duas. She stretched before getting up to retrieve her phone which she couldn't remember where she kept. After a futile search in her handbag she checked the small clock on top of Zubaidah's vanity which reads 7:30pm. She hurriedly went to the bathroom to perform another ablution after which she offered maghrib and ishaa prayers taking her time in sujood telling Allah her desires and seeking His guidance.

Hajar came in shortly after she was done saying her azhkars.

"What happened? Did he say yes?" Rufaidah blurted, forgetting to reply Hajar's greetings.

"The obvious happened, what else?" Hajar stated matter of fact, making her way to the closet.

"Please tell me nothing is wrong I swear to God my heart will soon explode. Come and feel the way it is beating fast if you think I am lying " Rufaidah stood up to meet Hajar who is trying so hard to keep her cool facade intact.

Rufaidah put her hands on her chest and true to her words her heart is beating fast and she's even trembling.

"Relax. They said yes, everything went well and in shaa Allah you will become Yaya Al'amin's queen in three months time" Hajar said finally laughing to her heart's content. Zubaidah had told them about what happened earlier when they came back.

Rufaidah whispered Alhamdulillah before bowing down in Sujud Al Shukr to thank Allah.

"Lallai Rufs. Someone might think that you've been in love with Yaya Al'amin for three decades and you have suffered for years before finally having him. Congratulations though. May Allah bless your union and Ya sakamu a danshinku" Hajar hugged her giving her their killer identical smile. Whenever she looked into the mirror, she used to wonder if she really is cousins with Rufaidah or they are twins separated at birth.

She left a happy Rufaidah in the room to snitch on the members of the house that she is awake and tell them about her reaction.

They all came in to congratulate her. She started shouting and jumping only to act meek and coy when Hajia Samira came in to offer her heartfelt felicitation.

"I think she is possessed" Zubaidah announced, shocked at the total switch of character by Rufaidah.

"Nothing is wrong with her, she is just happy" Hajia Samira said, getting up to leave.

"Who even told you that a woman is supposed to be happy when she gets engaged? Do you think married life is easy and something to look forward to? Especially in this era that men don't even value and treat their wives with respect." Zubaidah said in a sombre tone, changing the happy vibe to a moody reflective one.

After some minutes she clapped her hands and yelled "Gotcha" before running out of the room.

"Allahu yahdiki Zuby" Hajar shouted after her.

Around 8:45pm, Yaya Hafiz came in to congratulate and also tell her that Shams is waiting for her outside. She finally found her phone under the bed before she left, making the girls promise that they will come to her house for the weekend and wedding preparations because Zubaidah keeps stressing that there is no time.

"Goodnight Yaya Hafiz. Tell Uncle Jibran I said goodnight" she waved before entering the passenger side.

"Assalamu alaikum B" she squealed squeezing giving him an awkward hug.

"Waalaikissalam bride. So no more pacing up and down kenan. Burinki ya cika" he replied smiling down at her. His heart filled with gratitude that his sister is happy and is soon getting married to a guy he trust not to ever hurt her or let her cry.

"Alhamdulillah B! You have no idea how scared I was. I was thinking of the worst case scenarios" she went on to tell him about everything that happened as he listened with keen interest chipping in some things here and there.

"You are going to make a beautiful bride, a good wife and a happy home in shaa Allah. I trust you" he told her as they reach the house.

She met her parents waiting for her with proud smiles. They also congratulated her, told her how she made a good choice and that she will be happily blessed in her home. They talked about everything and nothing until it gets late.

She took a hot relaxing bath and got ready for bed. She wondered why her malik didn't call her since morning but then, she didn't check her phone for almost eight hours if not more.

"Subhanallah" she muttered as she saw 60 missed calls and 120 text messages. She quickly dialed his number with shaky hands, poor guy he was anxious too, maybe more than her and she totally forgot to check up on him.

"Assalamu alaikum, I am so sorry darling please forgive me, wallah I couldn't find my phone earlier and when I did I was in haste because Yaya Shams was waiting for me then I met my parents and had been with them since then until now" she said in one breath.

"You scared me Noor. I thought you don't want to marry me or something bad happened to you. Shams and Hafiz blocked me saying I will disturb their peace of mind" he let out a woosh of air.

"I  am really sorry! You have no idea what I went through today but I wont tell you until after we get married " she teased and they agree to do just that.

"Congratulations Fiance, in 3 months we will become one till jannah in shaa Allah" he said making her blush.

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No rants today. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Drop your comments on how you think am doing so far and what you'd like to be done differently.

Shukran jazeel.