Credit for the AMV above goes to the YouTube channel Kitty!

CHAPTER FIVE

There was no escaping reality, no matter how hard Adrien tried. His father sent him back to school shortly after Marinette's death, and Adrien was honestly very surprised that his father hadn't decided to pull him out of Collège Françoise Dupont altogether... especially after what one of his fellow classmates and friend had done. Even at school, people talked about Marinette's death as if it needed to be discussed. And perhaps it did. Maybe it could help prevent other people from doing what she did. But Adrien hated it. He hated it when that was all everyone ever talked about.

The only word Adrien could use to describe himself was unfocused. Adrien moved from class to class with a somber expression on his face, and the other students parted the hallways for him because no one was bold enough to stand in his way. It was almost as if everyone feared him now, and he wasn't nearly opposed to that theory at all. If people left him alone, that was a good thing. He preferred not to talk to anyone anyway, especially when most of the people he used to talk to were fake.

Adrien dragged his feet down every hall and kept his hoodie pulled over his head. He covered his eyes and kept his head low—away from everyone's view, and he plugged in his earbuds to drown out the outside world.

When he reached his locker, Adrien turned his gaze down the hall to find Marinette's locker, which was about twenty lockers away from his own. He watched solemnly as someone whom he didn't even recognize stood in front of it, adding some sort of sentimental message to her locker.

He forced himself to look away.

Every time he saw somebody write a message for Marinette on her locker, he wondered if they actually meant anything they were saying.

He punched in his locker combination and groaned the moment he was greeted with tons of paperwork he seriously needed to throw away. He pulled out a book for his next class and stuffed it into his shoulder bag. Adrien wasn't even sure why he still tried to pay attention in any of his classes. It was pointless.

His thoughts always ended up wandering over towards Marinette anyway, and her permanent absence made it extremely difficult for him to concentrate on anything else besides her.

Adrien missed her in more ways than he could even describe.

He really did.

"Adrien!"

The voice that addressed him was muffled, considering he currently had music blasting through his ears, and if it wasn't for the fact that he'd been tapped on the shoulder as well, he probably would've completely ignored the person. Grudgingly, Adrien turned around to face the individual.

...and quickly realized how big of a mistake that was.

Chloé stood in front of him with a hand on her hip, eyeing him expectantly. "Where have you been, Adrien?! I've been trying to get a hold of you for weeks, and you haven't been answering your phone! What do you have a damn phone for if you can't even pick up any of my calls!"

Adrien arched an unamused brow and removed one of his earbuds from his ear so that he could, unfortunately, listen to her whining. "Sorry, Clo. I guess I was just too busy grieving to notice you had called." He said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Ultimately, Adrien had been avoiding Chloé altogether. Marinette's death forced him to get a new perspective on a lot of things in his life, and that included his relationship with Chloé. He could hardly stand to look at her anymore, and not because he was disgusted with her, but because he was disgusted with himself. He was ashamed for even being intimate with her, and he regretted everything he ever did with her. But... even though it was too late to change the past, it wasn't too late to rewrite the future.

Chloé gaped at him, clearly taken aback by his sarcasm, but then she let out a cackled laugh. "Grieving? You?" She pointed a finger at him. "Please! I don't buy that for a second."

"You don't have to. I'm not even trying to sell it."

"Whatever," Chloé rolled her eyes. "This whole conversation is irrelevant anyway. The point is: I have some important stuff to tell you." She didn't bother to wait for his response. "So, as you know, daddy is throwing a dinner party tomorrow evening, and he wanted me to bring a plus one... so I figured—"

"No."

Chloé blinked. Then she blinked again. "No? What do you mean 'no?'"

"Exactly what it means." Adrien deadpanned, "I'm not going to a stupid dinner with you. I don't even want to go."

Chloé's brows rose in confusion. "I don't understand. You always used to attend the dinner parties with me."

"Mostly because I was forced to... by my father."

"Oh, so what? It'll just be for a few hours." Chloé insisted nonetheless, batting her eyelashes innocently as if that would somehow get him to change his mind. "Besides, it'll give us a chance to catch up. My father would be delighted to see you, you know."

"The answer is still no, Chloé."

"Adrieeennn!" Chloé whined as she stomped her foot in frustration. "C'mon! I need you there! I'm going to look so foolish in front of everyone when the family asks where my boyfriend is."

"I'm not your boyfriend."

"But you could be~"

Adrien slammed his locker door closed, somewhat startling Chloé. When he turned to face her again, she was staring up at him with wide eyes. "It's about time you realize we're not in a relationship." He said seriously, "I don't want a relationship with you, Chloé. I am not attracted to you whatsoever."

Chloé stepped back, but her expression remained determined. It irked him when a smug smile spread across her lips. "If you aren't attracted to me, why do we have sex almost every other weekend, hmm?"

Adrien tilted his head to the side, offering her a fake, exasperated smile. "Do we?" He questioned, and he watched as her smile fell. "Oh wait. Not anymore, Chloé. Because I'm done."

Adrien moved past her before he could witness her reaction, and his shoulder bumped hers as he passed. Continuing down the hallway with an emotionless expression on his face, he didn't bother to look back and see Chloé's face. The least of his concerns wondered if Chloé was chasing after him. Adrien wanted nothing more to do with her, and he hoped that message came across clearly enough.

He picked up his pace, and his hand tightened involuntarily around the strap of his book bag as he neared Marinette's locker. By the time he reached the girl who was standing in front of it, she was about to head to her next class.

He tried not to let his eyes wander over to the message she had left. Though it was considered public, he felt that was an invasion of privacy.

Even though he would probably come back to read it later.

When she realized his presence, the girl looked up at him in question.

He cleared his throat awkwardly, "Did you know Marinette?"

The girl didn't hesitate to answer. Her expression remained emotionless as she replied, "Yes, I did."

"For how long?"

She raised a peculiar brow at him, but she didn't seem to mind his questions. "Not for long, unfortunately," She sighed somewhat regretfully, "We were just starting to become friends before I discovered she had deceased."

Adrien shoved his hands into his pockets. "I... uh... don't think we've ever met. I'm Adrien."

"I know who you are," The girl said, her tone sounding suddenly almost bitter as her eyes studied him from head to toe. "You're Adrien Agreste. Fashion model for teen weekly, playboy, fencer, rich, and a daddy's boy."

Adrien winced. There was no denying that his reputation had some good and some bad sides to it. This would be one of those circumstances where he would consider his reputation to be a bit bad. He may have been a model, and he may have wealth, but none of those things mattered much to him anymore.

They stopped mattering as much the moment he found out Marinette was dead.

"Right," He reached up to rub at the nape of his neck sheepishly, "What did you say your name was again?"

"I didn't."

He winced. "Can I ask what your name is then?"

The girl finished pinning her sentiment on Marinette's locker before she turned around to face him fully. There was no emotion held in her voice as she said, "Kagami. Kagami Tsurugi."

Recognition struck him the moment he heard her name, and he pointed a finger at her as if it had all suddenly clicked. "Wait... I know you! We have fencing tryouts together."

Kagami crossed her arms above her chest, but her expression remained passive. "Indeed we do. It somewhat humors me that you just now realized this after months of duels."

Adrien frowned slightly, "I didn't just realize that. I mean... cut me some slack. It's not like we were really friends."

"Thank god."

"Look," Ignoring her remark, Adrien rolled his eyes. "I'm not here to try and be your friend." He admitted carelessly. However harsh it sounded, Kagami didn't seem to care. "All I want is to ask you some questions about Marinette... if you're comfortable. I have some questions in need of answers."

Kagami raised a brow. "And you think I have the answers to them?"

"Maybe."

She scoffed at that, and he couldn't find it in himself to add anything else.

Instead, his attention was diverted over Kagami's shoulder, where he found his best friend leaning against a locker, who was currently talking—no, flirting with—a blonde cheerleader. Adrien only had to take one look at the girl to know he had fucked her once before, and he wasn't necessarily proud of that.

Instantly, Adrien frowned.

Nino was going to be a father... no matter how far he tried to run from it. He didn't have the leisure to move on like that... and so easily. Alya needed him. He didn't realize how badly Alya needed him.

Adrien's eyes anxiously returned to hers in a heartbeat. "Look, if you want to think about it first, no sweat. Here..." Quickly, he scribbled his phone number onto a small piece of paper and handed it to her. "If you're up to answer some questions, call me."

Her fingers brushed against his as she took the piece of paper from his hand. Kagami glanced down at his number before she met his eyes again. "You are nothing but trouble, Agreste." She said curtly, her voice flat and unwavering, but... it wasn't a direct decline to his proposition either. Adrien couldn't help but smile. Whether her words were meant to be a sarcastic remark or an insult to whatever honor he had left (if he had any left), it didn't matter.

All that mattered was that she was going to consider talking to him.

And that was enough.

Offering her a small smile as thanks, Adrien continued his way down the hall, but his smile fell almost instantly the moment he realized that his next objective was to confront Nino, who was too busy flirting with another girl to notice him approaching.

"Adrien! You have a tail!" Kagami called after him.

He turned back around and raised a confused brow, unsure of what she meant by that... until he realized Chloé was running after him, a frantic look spread across her face.

His frown deepened at the sight of her.

"What do you mean you're 'done?'" Chloé asked him worriedly once she had been able to catch up with him. The look she had to offer him was pained, and he wasn't sure whether to feel sorry for being the cause of it or not.

"I'm done messing around with you, Chloé."

Her bottom lip trembled slightly, "Why?"

He offered her a pointed look. "Because it's wrong, and I want to start doing the right thing. Besides, wouldn't you rather be with someone who actually loves you?"

"But I do love you!"

"I said someone who loves you."

"But don't you love me?"

"Not in that way," Adrien groaned in frustration. "Do you even know what love is, Chloé?"

She scoffed at him. "Of course, I do!"

"Whatever," Adrien rolled his eyes. "It doesn't even matter how you feel about me because I don't love you like that in return. I'm sorry, Clo, but you need to understand and respect that."

Her lower lip jutted out as she pouted, but for the first time in a long time, she didn't argue against him. Adrien arched an eyebrow, almost as if he was anticipating her retort.

Which he was. But instead, she asked him softly, "Can we at least be friends?"

Both of his brows rose in surprise. Now that, he hadn't been expecting.

Chloé had always been adamant about the fact that she wanted to be so much more than just friends. But, when you're put in a position that might cause you to lose someone you care about, your views on what you want might just change.

"Really?" Adrien was unconvinced. He arched a disbelieving brow. "You would actually treat me as your friend and nothing more?"

Chloé nodded eagerly, though there was no gleam in her eyes as she met his. "As much as I care about you, Adrien, I don't want to lose you as a friend. We've been friends ever since we were really little. I couldn't imagine my life without you in it at all. So yes. If it means you'll stay, I want to at least remain your friend."

And that was all he needed to know. Adrien smiled softly and extended his hand out to hers, and Chloé took it hesitantly. "Friends?"

He watched as a small smile crept to her lips, and she nodded, "Friends."

Adrien parted ways with Chloé feeling lighter. It was almost as if a burden had been lifted off of his shoulders; almost as if his decision to end things with Chloé intimately was a way of avenging Marinette's death.

He felt relieved.

But that would be short-lived. "Nino!" Adrien called out to his friend, and he watched with a disapproving look in his eye as Nino looked past the girl he was currently talking to and smiled.

Adrien couldn't find it in himself to smile back.

Whether Nino noticed the cold look his best friend had to offer him or not, he excused himself from the girl he was talking to as he made his way over to Adrien. They met halfway. "Hey dude, what's up?"

Nino outstretched his hand, attempting to do their usual handshake.

But... Adrien didn't acknowledge it.

Nino drew his hand back. "Okay then. What's going on with you now?"

"Were you really over there flirting with that girl just now?" Adrien asked, his tone flat and unwavering.

For a moment, Nino stared dumbfounded at his friend. And then he snorted, "Don't tell me you're jealous."

Jealous? Adrien wanted to laugh at that. Instead, his facial expression remained emotionless as he stared at his best friend.

Nino's amused expression didn't waver. "Do you like her or something?"

Ha. Far from it actually.

"Actually, no."

Nino raised a confused brow. "So what's the issue then?"

The issue was that Alya needed him, and he needed to man up, but Adrien knew that this wasn't the best time to bring it up. Their school wasn't exactly the most appropriate place to talk about it either, but that didn't mean he wouldn't if he had to.

When Adrien remained silent, Nino continued, "Don't tell me you two have already had sex?"

Adrien shrugged, "Something like that."

"Jesus Christ Agreste."

"It wasn't that great, but that's beside the point."

"What's the point then?"

Adrien crossed his arms. "The point is that you shouldn't be trying to get with anyone else. You and I both know you have a girl who needs you."

"She's not my girl."

"Fuck you, Nino. Alya is better than that bitch you were just flirting with." Adrien spat out and watched as his friend's eyes widened. "She's different from all the other girls, and that's what makes her someone you can't afford to lose."

Nino rolled his eyes. "It's not even any of your business."

"It is when I can see she's hurting."

"Fuck off, Adrien."

"No, you fucking listen to me," Adrien snarled and stepped forward, grabbing ahold of Nino's shirt collar and pulling him forward. Due to their slight height differences, Adrien towered over Nino. He didn't care if it would cause a scene; Adrien was angry. "You need to put on some big boy pants, step up, and be the man she needs. She's scared out of her mind right now because she has no fucking clue how she's going to do it on her own. Imagine raising a kid all on your own!" Adrien shook his friend as if that would somehow get some common sense into him, and he felt Nino tremble under his hold. "Imagine it!"

Nino squeezed his eyes shut, and Adrien swore he saw a tear slip past the barrier and stain his cheek.

Again, Adrien shook him. "Wake up, man. If you don't know what to do, ask for help. Ask me. But don't run away from it. Don't run away from her."

Adrien pulled Nino into a hug before anything could escalate, and he felt his best friend fall into the embrace and cry onto his shoulder. The blonde knew that his friend was better than that. But sometimes, people make terrible decisions based on fear.

"Don't be afraid, man," Adrien whispered against his friend's shoulder. "I got your back. Anything you need, bro. I got you."

Because he did. He would have Nino's back. Always. Even through times like these. Adrien knew deep down that he and Alya both needed each other.

Maybe even more than they realized it themselves.

The intercom in the hallway, however, interrupted and ruined their bro moment.

"May Adrien Agreste and Nino Lahiffe please come to the principal's office."

When Adrien returned home from school, he knew his father would be there to greet him.

Not to say hello, of course. Only to reprimand him for getting called to the principal's office.

After being called to the principal's office, Adrien and Nino were both given a suspension for apparently starting a fight on school property. Though, it wasn't a fight at all, more like a confrontation that needed to happen. Unfortunately, neither of them were given the opportunity to explain themselves.

When they left Mr. Damocles' office, Adrien apologized to Nino for getting him suspended.

Nino told him it was fine.

They were forced to part ways and head home, and Adrien knew that the moment he stepped through the front doors of the mansion, his father would be waiting for him.

And sure enough, Gabriel Agreste stood at the top of the staircase looking very displeased. "Why did I get a call from your principal telling me you were suspended for a day?"

Adrien casually strode into the main room, shrugging his shoulders as he replied idly, "Because he's an ass."

"Refrain from using such language in my presence."

Adrien chose not to respond to that.

"You know that I allow you to attend school because you promised to be on your best behavior." Gabriel sounded heartless and stern as he spoke, and as a child, that would've frightened Adrien to an immense extent.

But that didn't work anymore. Especially when Adrien was able to get away with a lot under his father's nose.

"We didn't even do anything wrong, father. Nino and I were talking about something very important, and someone in the hall must've thought we were starting a fight."

Gabriel didn't look convinced. "The principal said someone saw you grab Mr. Lahiffe's collar."

"I did, but not for the reasons you may think."

"What other reason could you possibly have for grabbing someone else's collar aggressively?"

"We were having an... intense discussion."

Gabriel sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I do not have time for this nonsense. Go to your room."

"But father—"

"We will discuss any further punishment if needed later."

Adrien frowned at the man in front of him. Of course, his father would be unwilling to listen to him or to try and understand the whole story. Why should he expect anything different? Without another word, he bounded up the steps and passed his father, heading for his bedroom. He slammed the door behind him, fully aware that it would probably cost him an additional punishment, but he honestly didn't care.

He felt so alone.

His home was like a prison.

Was this what Marinette felt like before she decided to take her own life?

He didn't even want to know.

"Hey, kid?" Plagg poked his head out from his holder's shirt. "You okay?"

Adrien groaned and flopped back into his bed, throwing an arm over his eyes.

"Kid?"

Adrien groaned again, "Life sucks, Plagg."

The kwami hummed idly, "I guess. But you have it better than most, kid."

Adrien chose not to respond to that.

Instead, he reached into his school bag and pulled out Marinette's journal. As he propped his head up on his pillow, Adrien began to flip to the page he'd left off on.

Truthfully, he wasn't staying efficient in reading Marinette's writings. Sometimes, what she had to say made him feel even worse, especially when he was already drowning in guilt.

Nonetheless, he flipped to the second journal entry and began to read.

Journal entry number 2:
Date: September 3, 2017

Hi again. Things are already starting to get intense... and that was only the first entry. How will you handle the rest? Things didn't get nicer or easier from there, and I still have so much to cover.

I guess I can start with you and me. Our relationship is all over the place, wouldn't you agree? So much so that I could never understand what we were. Were we friends? Acquaintances? Or were we more than that at one point? You always were super confusing, Adrien.

He dropped the book onto his stomach and groaned, reaching up to rub his hands over his face.

So... it was getting to that part of the story.

Adrien wasn't sure if he was ready for that part yet.

Adrien turned his head to the side to look over at Plagg, who had situated himself at the edge of the pillow. He was in the middle of eating his camembert when their eyes connected.

"Are you up for a run?"

The little kwami raised a confused brow. "Now? But it's in the middle of the day."

"So?"

"So, what do you think will happen when mr 'I'm too strict' and 'the mom replacer' come looking for you to add that additional punishment."

"Do not talk about Nathalie like that," Adrien replied sternly, frowning at him. "She did not replace my mother."

Plagg shrugged idly and resumed eating his cheese. "Whatever you say, Adrien."

The silence that stretched out between them left Adrien feeling uneasy. It was filled with tension that didn't make any sense.

"She didn't."

Plagg rolled his eyes. "Okay, I heard you the first time."

But... that didn't sound convincing.

"Father would never..." Adrien thought to himself, though it was spoken completely out loud. He turned to shoot his kwami a frightened look. "Would he?"

Plagg chose not to respond to that.

Adrien decided to remain silent. Either his kwami knew something was up, or there was nothing to worry about.

If his father and Nathalie really were in some sort of relationship, he would know...

Right?

Because as much as he cared about Nathalie, he didn't want her as a mother figure in his life.

No one could take his mother's place.

His phone vibrated beside him, and Adrien sat up against the headboard of his bed as he reached for his phone. He opened a message from Alya, and his eyes widened in shock when he realized what exactly she had sent him.

'I wanted to tell you this when you came over to visit me, but I was kind of afraid and ashamed to tell you. But you need to know. The truth is... I'm pregnant... and your best friend, Nino Lahiffe, is the father.'

_______________________________

"I didn't come this far, to only come this far." — anonymous

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