Texts From Last Night

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Arcee: Wheeljack is soooo cute

Arcee: He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him

Chromia: Are you drunk?

Arcee: No I'm Arcee

>>●<<

Miko: Packing for collage has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.

Bulkhead: MIKO NAKADAI

Miko: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO WRONG NUMBER!

Bulkhead: I wish I could unread that

>>●<<

Lennox: Just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off my chest. You're all assholes.

Epps: I should have known you were drunk when you were having a conversation with a tiki torch

>>●<<

Miko: Jack, I think you went too far last night

Jack: Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Burger King

>>●<<

Epps: Only two more days and then we're on leave!

Lennox: Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.

>>●<<

Sunstreaker: So Bluestreak, how'd your date go?

Bluestreak: It went pretty well

Bluestreak: When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.

>>●<<

Smokescreen: I hate Snapchat

Bee: Why?

Smokescreen: Someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl

>>●<<

Jack: Last night was weird. Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am...I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.

>>●<<

Prowl: You're paying for the new berth-frame. Now where am I going to sleep tonight?

Jazz: Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty berth frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.

>>●<<

Glenn Whitmann: Where did you disappear to last night?

Maggie Madsen: I assumed that you passed out. I'm drinking jager and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship would have been appreciated.

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