At least my last night went in that pain, imagining my Arpita with my best friend. Don't know when the dawn broke and everyone came to work again I realized when our peon came and asked me for some tea or something. After that Simple and Chulbul came they were still angry with me, Now what else I can ask from God... my Love, my friends everyone is angry with me, maybe that's the best time to go. But no, I still have to suffer, I have to see Arpita with RV, if they will be happy only then my soul can rest in peace, just hope so, if it doesn't happen then what will I do?

It's noon and still no news from RV. Hope He went to Arpita and She signed those papers even in anger or hate. Great She must hate me now, it's all happening as I want, then why is this pain raising?

Why am feeling suffocated?

Why everything around me seems worthless?

Is this my jealousy or possessiveness that I have to see them together, or My love that I can't be able to see her as Mine, I can't be able to feel her presence around me?

She will not be there in the kitchen when I will return home, She will not be waiting for me anymore...all these thoughts were making me sick and self-disgust, when the cell rang and it called her name "Arpita" my Arpita My love, My life, "Arpita" and don't know why but I hugged her name (my cell as its calling her name on her call..) and cried to my heart as She still wanted to talk to me, I know Why!

As I didn't return home last whole night, even didn't call, She must be worried for me, that's my love who still care for me even when I hurt her, So badly.

The cell was ringing continuously, I couldn't pick it as I couldn't act anymore and She must guess my condition by my voice at that condition. And the worse part was that I couldn't as I want to hear her name as much as I can in the last few hours.

As her calls stopped I called RV to assure that He was really going to her with those papers.

"RV.. please say that you are going to meet Arpita," I said controlling my voice from tumbling.

RV-"Yes I am Avi and am just about to knock at your door, to steal your love, snatch her from your arms; now it depends on you and her, if you want you can still stop me believe me I will be the happiest person on earth if you changes your decision."
He said in a detached tone.

"Steal your love, snatch her from your arms" his words seem like melted led to my ears. I controlled myself, as I know he was saying it to trigger me, but now I can't. I hardly said-

"No, can't step back now" and cut the call.

Am still feeling as He is laughing at me, my misery though I know He was not. God knows how I spend that half an hour, after which He called me back and his words were-

"Great Avi! thankyou, thank you so much for giving Arpita to me, She is really very beautiful, and now when She has signed those papers you have to promise me for one thing."

I was surprised, was he telling me the truth or just lying? Or He meant what He was saying I just could sigh -"What?"

His reply shocked me-"Oh, I thought you will get it, well if you want to hear... ok then, I just want one favor of yours now, that you will stay away from her from now.
you know She hardly prepared herself to get away from you if now you will come close I doubt, She can change her mind. You know until I complete all formalities legally, She will be your wife, so just stay away from My Arpita. "

and He disconnected the call.

"My Arpita" how can He say that when he knows how much I love her, how can He think to say all that to me, I was seething in anger but soon realized that fact is that I want it to happen, I allow him to snatch my love from my arms, then why his words affect me so much, I suppose to be happy that She signed those papers and accepted RV, no He didn't said that She accepted him.

Maybe He convinced her to be his friend so in a few days He can propose to her and take my space in her life after all She will not go back to her stepmother now.

It's good. Then why I feel bad, why this anger, why all this frustration, why I feel like hate RV, why I want to see Arpita, why I want to hug her, why I want to confess my love to her, what should I do now, I feel like am the biggest idiot on the whole earth.

I can see him laughing at me in the mirror I just banged the vase on it and it shattered into pieces, Simple came in running and found that glass shattered She called the peon and he cleaned it all.

It started to dark by now just like my life. All dark no sign of light and I know there will be no ray of hope after it as My Arpita will not be there anymore, I just sat back to my chair behind the table to be in darkness, Darkness! Yes, this was going to be my life for the rest of my days in this world. That Voice, which could bring that light of love back in my life! I have sent her far away from my life.

"Life" let's see how many days are left there to suffer, to burn in the fire of living hell. Simple opened the door and caused the outer light to pour in-" Avi it's almost 9, we all are leaving and I think you too should go home now."
She said in sympathy.

"HOME! What is that Simple? I don't have any home now." I replied without facing her.

Simple-"Avi I know what's going in your mind and soul, but think about Arpita. You are here from yesterday, She must be worried about you, at least don't punish her to love you."

"I am thinking about her Simple that's why am not going there. RV has talked to her and She is convinced to divorce me, if now I go there She can feel bad and who knows if I lose my control and confess everything in front of her She will never accept RV after me"

Simple just shouted on me with wonder-"What! What are you saying Avdhesh? How can you think that? You are just impossible..."

It was expected from her that's why I didn't tell her before. But what happened next was unexpected for both of us. She suddenly stops in mid and I heard that voice for which I was dying.

"So you are hidden here."

It's my Arpita, her anger was visible in her voice, how can I expect her to not question me, I slightly wiped my tears and gathered my self for another self-destructive performance. While Simple just looked at me and left us alone there was a victorious smile on her lips when She looked at me as if She was saying,

"Now face her and answer her questions let me see how long you can hide your actual condition!!! Lie as much as you can."

As I had confessed my fear of losing control over emotions and facing her already.

"How can you do this to me Avdhesh Ji? Do you think am a doll or something which you can play with and pass on to your friend? You just send these papers with that guy and thought I will sign them and let you go like this, for that woman, No I will not."

What she said!

Was that mean She didn't sign those papers yet!

Did that mean RV was lying to me?

But why and how could He cheat me like that? What should I do now?

How could I face her?

OK if he didn't convince her to leave me then I have to do it myself.

"Be practical Arpita" I said as nothing happened.

"Be practical! That's all you want to explain for your deed, is it Avdhesh ji, You are sending a guy for me, want me to marry him, just because you want to marry someone else and don't want your name as the one who spoilt my life."

She said it all in one go with disgust. Her words pierced my soul.

"sending a guy for me!"

how disgusting was it? But I controlled my self and all I could voice was

"Yes"

"really Avdhesh ji, do you know what the meaning of marrying someone, I don't think so, ok let me explain it to you in your way, what it was for you.
Ok .. just close your eyes and imagine me in his arms, as I was in yours, all those nights, in the last few months, no space between us not even for air. How does it feel? Can you feel anything?"

Again there was disgust in her voice but this time may be for both of us as She was visualizing all hell. And as She voiced her words all the images created by my mind again started to appear in front of my eyes and I don't know what I clutched firmly in my injured palm...I want to shout at her and stop her words. But anyhow, I hardly controlled my self and I think about what's the real meaning of Marriage, of love that pure desire to protect her whenever I hugged her that tight, and I know RV. He will look after her well may be better than me because He can stay with her whole life unlike me.

And I said-"No!... I didn't feel anything."

but seems it was too late, I couldn't hide my self anymore, it started to feel suffocated, I couldn't breathe with it, the thought of losing her was unbearable for me and now I was making distance with her this way, I was hurting her every second with my every word. Her condition was unbearable for me; couldn't bear her like that for even a second more.

I just got up and stood next to the window facing out so she could leave.

But instead of leaving She was coming closer to me, with her each step my heart was hitting badly against ribs and asking for more closeness of her as it wants to beat in her presence only.

She came next to me, I know She was crying silently and I can't bear that, the way She was looking at me without a blink. Her state was enough to melt a stone but I couldn't. Its for her well being I had to hurt her and my self both.

I can't dare to look into her eyes so I just turned face. And it was on time as with next blink a tear rolled down from my eye, which I wiped quickly and next moment, I realized ... she was in my feet, begging for my love, crying badly.

"Please Avdhesh ji, Don't leave me, I can't live without you."

I looked at her and my heart started to bleed on her miserable condition, what I had made her from a young, happy, full of life girl to a shattered pregnant futureless women.

"Please Avdhesh ji, Stay with me, even if you don't love me,"

Of course, I love you my heart and soul screamed.

"I love you; you are everything to me."

She was fumbling as she was crying badly and saying all that I wanted to say always; but now I was hearing it all from her and instead of giving pleasure it was hurting me because She was ready to sacrifice her self esteem just for me, even when She thinks I never loved her ever, which shade of love was that We both had come so far in love that our self-respect and existence! Just don't have any existence for us.

"Everything to me, Please stay with me. Ok if you want to marry that girl, go ahead I will not say a word. I will sign these papers with pleasure, but you have to promise me that you will stay with me. I don't care what the world will call me, keep, second lady whatever.."

Oh god, why all this happening with me, I was doing all this for her safety her happiness, and here, She was still ready to go to any extent for me, why She loves me so much, her words "Keep, second lady" pour in my ears as melted led and shacked me badly.

" all I want is you. I will not ask anything for me or for my baby, I promise, I promise. If you go away from me I can't live I will die Avdhesh ji. I can't breathe when I think myself without you.."

That was a limit for me, I couldn't act anymore I couldn't see her like that anymore, I found my self unable to stand, to stay away from her even for a second and I fell on my knees in front of her.  Even I was feeling the same from the moment I thought to send her away from me, I couldn't breathe properly, it was suffocating, I can't live with the thought of living without her. She was in front of me, just at arm's length, She was crying, voicing my feelings.

I promised myself that I will never allow any sorrow to touch her and here I was hurting her so much that She was shattered in my feet. I never dreamt to treat or see her such weak.

I forgot everything... there was no past, no future for me all I know was that My love needs me, my care, my support.

I took her face in palm and wiped off tears from her cheek, her sobs were intolerable for me, She was in front of me, maybe for the last time, I know She will not accept me after what I had done to her and by tomorrow when RV will submit those papers or whenever it will happen... She will not be mine ever, all I had was that moment so I did what I always wanted to do and did every morning and night when She use to sleep fast.

I drag her close and held the back of her neck firmly so She can't go away and placed a soft kiss on her lips and stopped her begging and sobs both.

As I kissed her, those lips. I realized after how long I found her, I saw her, I felt her, and maybe after this moment I would not be able to see her. I looked at her soft gentle face the soft light of the moon was making her shine like a fresh pearl in its shell.

I kissed her a bit more passionately, her hands were on my chest as if She was about to push me away from herself. No, I can't bear it. Just one more time, just one more time I want to touch her feel her, to touch those lips which are my life, just one more time...and don't know how many times but I kissed her, every time I tried to control my self and stop, but I couldn't.

Every time the urge of her closeness was turning stronger. After many continuous kisses, I hardly controlled my self as She was like a doll in my firm hold... no response which means She didn't like it at all, how can I expect her to reply to my soul's call when I hurt her so badly.

It was hard but I tried to leave her, I tried to release her from my arms, but can't stop my self from kissing her for the last time. It would be my last touch and after it as RV said I will not have any right to touch her, to think of her if I want her happy.

It was hard but I loosen the hold on her waist and touched her lips for the last time, but when my all hopes were dying She blew new life in it, before I could get away from her She responded, her lips followed mine before I could leave her, She kissed me back.

I found a new life in me, I held her more firmly and kissed her with all my love, which She received with same love and triggered that passion of love which I was controlling hardly, I hugged her as firm as I can and her arms went around my neck and I can feel her fingers caressing me. Finally, I found all that I wanted before dying, her love, her acceptance of my love, I expressed my love which I could never voice in that moment, in that touch in that kiss.
💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

"It is the passion in a kiss that gives to it its sweetness; it is the affection in a kiss that sanctifies it."

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

This is All for this part.
It's a bit long, hope you liked it.
Thanks for reading.
Jo...