Written by TheBestRobin1

Warnings: There's angst ig but if you don't read this it means you're missing out on something real good besties. I mean it 

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It's dark. It's cold.

The wind swirls and ripples, grey pooling with light that seems to drip from the windows and pool on the floor. Avoiding me. The light is avoiding me.

Which, I suppose, is fair.

I shudder. Draw the blankets closer to myself. Nights when ice studs the sky and scorches the air, when it scrapes your throat every time you breathe, they're so much harder to stand than they used to be. I used to have Spryzen: perhaps a simple chunk of plastic and metal, but I'd always sworn there was a heartbeat; Valt, the light of my life; Daigo; Xander; Ukyo; Orochi. I had Astem; Boa; Spryzen.

It really is cold.

I did lose a lot of weight in the Pit. I was never the healthiest child, after all, and I suppose I could've eaten more often, especially being Valt's friend...

Used to be.

And it's all gone now. It's all gone.

This is useless. Thinking about everything I used to have. It's not coming back, not if I wish for a thousand years. Santa would never grant a child such as me a wish that great. If he did, I would refuse. They're better off without me. They're better off without me. I'm a stepping stone- a thing to be used and tossed aside, lest it weigh them down. What else is it good for, anyway?

I know they're with Valt right now. One elevator ride and two blocks later, and I could be with them, laughing in the almost-warmth of their bakery. Valt's father returned, I heard, for the time being. Got a break, even with all the holiday flights. It's going to be the best Christmas the Aoi family will have in a while. I won't be part of it.

Reminiscing. Regretting.

That's not what I wanted. Sulking on Christmas Eve?

Look forward, not behind you.

But I inevitably stray to the past.

Was I always meant to be a disease? Did Theodore make me one? Would I have been like this anyways?

Like this?

Destructive. Cynical. Sadistic. Cruel.

Is this my fault? That I don't even know if I'm myself or Theodore's little monster?

Am I better off as Red Eye?

Beep! Beep! Beep!

My alarm.

The one to visit Valt.

Beep! Beep!

It sounds as if it's taunting me.

It is taunting me.

Beep! Beep! BEEEEE-

The cord is the first victim, torn out of the wall with such force that the rubber is ripped apart. The plug thuds to the ground, unevenly beheaded. The cord bleeds sparks, and they snuffle out of the frigid tile.

BeEEeeEEeeBeeEE-

It's still going.

It's still fucking going.

Shut up!

The rest of the alarm clock slams to the ground, and my bare foot comes down on top of it. The cheap plastic snaps into pieces, explodes outwards. There are shards buried in my skin. Blood taints the floor pinkish. I slam the remnants against the wall, over and over and over until the mangled remains of the motherboard are dust and splinters. My breathing is uneven.

But it's silent. It's blessedly, peacefully quiet, and now I've broken my only clock in an irrational fit of rage, and-

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"

It seeps into my brain. Not seep- rather, it oozes to the front door, pounds on it, then, as it opens, charges an explosive and rips the entire wall down. It surges in with a force that staggers me. Rockets around until I can hear nothing but electronic screams and I'm torn from my body, throwing myself back, back, back into-

Green fluid.

Rustling coats.

Electronic humming.

Overwhelming cold and burning snow.

Metal sings in my hands.

The dragon's here- where is he?

Point me in his direction. I will find him.

And we'll kill him.

The moonlight is burning my eyes. I wince and uncurl myself, stand up. There's pain in my feet, my legs, my stomach. Blood twines around me. I look down.

Ah. The clock

It's been torn apart. Shattered, twisted, deformed... it's difficult to describe how something so small, so solid, could be so quickly gutted and destroyed. I drag a piece out of my thigh. It's red. Glistening.

Two almost-perfect halves, save for the jagged line and chipped shaving running down the center; the bleeding outer edges snapping and disintegrating before my eyes.

We scream together. It hurts. Half my heart feels as if it's being ripped away.

My voice sounds so empty alone...

I told myself I was done with this. I told myself it was over. Astem has left me in peace. I am safe. I am safe. Why must I still remember this? Why am I still suffering? I'm done with this!

The kitchen is aglow with Christmas lights Valt set up. He swore it would make everything look more alive. He'd admired the way the counters sparkled and the floor reflected the red and gold.

It's bright and beautiful. The Christmas spirit! Valt proclaimed.

My heart aches when I see them. I miss Valt. I miss Spryzen...

I don't miss Requiem...

There is one thing in my kitchen that is not clean, white, pure. In the small space beneath the sink, there's an ugly, brick-brown box. I know the weight of it before I pick it up. When the lid's tugged off- it feels a thousand pounds more than it should- Red Eye's mask gleams at me.

Despite how I pounded at it for hours, it's just as I remember it. Clean and sharp, molded to fit my face perfectly. The voice changer is in perfect condition. It shines in the red-gold lights.

I itch to put it on again. I miss the power, the single-minded ambition it represents.

My hands twitch.

The ice beneath my bare feet is tacky. I glance down. There's blood on the ground. Shards still in my foot, my leg.

I don't miss the power.

This is your last chance.

The lights spark when I rip them down. String after string of Valt's tireless work burst on contact with the ground. Every time a light bulb bursts, I can hear a scream. Electricity surges down my arms and sparks snap from my skin. It's astoundingly sharp. It's agony. It's pleasure beyond compare.

The room is dark, but for the golden light dancing up and down my body.

One makes contact with that god-awful box. As if it were soaked in kerosene, it erupts into flames. The mask, inanimate as it is, is powerless to stop the flames engulfing it. It's eyes glare at me.

I meet its stare. Watch as it loses its lustre, as its color is eaten away. As it finally crumples to ash.

"Merry Christmas," I mutter.

My body gives out. I lay trembling on the floor.

It's over. It's over. I have nothing to remember the Snake Pit by now. It might as well be a bad dream. I am safe.

I exhale a shaky breath. I'm safe. Everything's in my head.

I'm safe.

The doorbell rings. I perk up. Valt's come back? There's only one set of feet at the door- a muffled thump of something hitting the carpet. I should tell him to leave. After all, I don't deserve to-

No. Even if I don't deserve him, he at least deserves an apology and a Merry Christmas!, doesn't he? I should promise Valt that he'll never have to save me again... no, I should promise that I'll come back. That I'll watch him get better and better and be there for him, like he was for me.

I smile. That's my promise.

I open the door, the words swelling on my lips. "Va-"

The hallway is empty.

"Valt?"

The sentence dies in my throat. There's a package on the ground. An ugly package. Brick brown.

My hands shake as I pry the lid off. I unfold the letter. Merry Christmas.

I set the letter aside and looked back at the package.

<insert picture of Red Eye's Mask here, please ^^>

Merry Christmas, Red Eye.

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Reader-chan, please cut me some slack, I haven't written in a month. Happy holidays!

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Bimsha is speaking because I can't let this go without saying a few words. 

GENIUS! THAT'S IT. THAT'S THE STORY. 

The use of language is spectacular. This is the literal meaning of when people says words can hurt. If your heartbeat doesn't pick up, and you just feel that hurt pouring out of the words, Idk what to say to you, really. 

This is angst like to the real core. The way Robin just poured all that hurt, angst, trauma through the words is beautiful. I've literally got no words. Just keep writing these masterpieces! I loved it! I literally just adore this oneshot because it's just too beautiful. You have made it angst in every sense of the word. The first person narration fits the story perfectly. We get to see a piece of Shu's mind and that emotional baggage through his own voice. I could literally hear the desperation.

 Btw the line breaks are awesome. It gives the story a great flow and slows down the pace so that the reader is allowed to digest every raw emotion. I also think it adds to the mess Shu's mind has become. It's going back and forth and you've just proved it through your lines and words. 

Five stars cuz the story is *chefs kiss*

THANK YOU FOR ALLOWING US TO SEE THIS BEAUTY! 

Keep writing more stories!

Merry Christmas!TheBestRobin1

Thanks for participating. I've still got goosebumps WANODWND plz